We had this morning off for zoom church which was lovely - people were being super open and honest about struggles they were having and it was just nice to see people encouraging and supporting each other.
Back in my little office for an hour now until lunch so just trying to make sense of all my manic highlighting and scribbling from yesterday and get it all compiled into a word doc to get essay 2 hopefully fully planned out today and started tomorrow. I honestly don't care if it's shit by my lecturer's standards, uni have put a safety net system in place so that as long as we get 40% of the marks to pass the module, our overall grade can't be dragged down. It can go up if we do really well (which frankly is out of the question for this module lmao it's caused me so much stress and anxiety this semester that I barely took anything in from the lectures) but it's a real comfort that this one crappy module can't disadvantage me. As long as I write something coherent that answers the question even to the most basic extent and my references are correct, I won't fail and it'll be done with minimal stress ✌🏼
Also feeling especially positive right now bc blasting SL2 - On a Ragga Tip and getting PUMPED! 💃🏼
Its only a paper moon
Tick Tick Time
there is love in your body (you can't hold it in)
The sun no longer shines (on your side)
Q’s for Lise
How did you find writing Tony Stark?
Remarkably enough, for a character I often find myself frustrated by, I really enjoy writing Tony. He’s fun - his glib way of talking, often using more words than necessary to talk around whatever he’s trying to get at, and at the same time terrifically blunt - is in a weird way kind of adjacent to Loki. They both tend to circumlocute, but in very different ways.At this point in the series it’s especially fun - developing Tony’s relationship with the idea of Steve/Loki from here to...where it is at the current point was something I enjoyed doing, even if it largely happened “off screen.”But this iteration of Tony has a better sense of what’s going on (in some ways) than Steve does, because from an outside perspective he’s not dealing with the level of denial that Steve feels.
What was your motivation for the ending of The sun no longer shines (on your side)?
At this point I was coming to (what I planned to be) the end of the main series. I’d been having Loki and Steve circle each other, Loki moving in and out as he pleased and walking a fine line without ever committing to anything, even as he and Steve get more and more tangled together. I actually knew that once I introduced Doom in “Tick Tick Time” that I was going to use him for...this, basically. When Loki is scared - when Loki is freaking out especially about the prospect of emotions - he tends to run in the other direction. If I wanted to get them somewhere, I needed to force Loki to stop running.In retrospect, there’s a kind of neatness to the fact that Loki and Steve’s relationship started with Loki crash landing in the Tower, and here it comes to a crossroads in the same way. Why I chose to end the fic there - I think it had to do with the fact that this fic was a specific arc and I knew that I had a whole other arc that it was moving onto. “The sun no longer shines (on your side)” was about bringing them together and forcing both of them to confront that this Thing they’ve been doing isn’t just a passing fad. The next fic (that I wrote, not chronologically), “with an untrained voice” (and here I am looking ahead), was about closing the circle. I do this a lot throughout the series - writing a specific story and then, rather than adding another chapter, having a separate fic that deals with the aftermath and repercussions. For some reason, I feel a need to separate those things.
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Here at the beginning of ‘its only a paper moon’, we find ourselves with a face full of Tony Stark; how else can one describe the man? Tony’s...Tony-ness is often difficult to pin down but the author has enough of his cadence and flavor for succinct verbosity that you can hear Downey’s voice when you actively read the first scene of ‘its only a paper moon’. A treat, to be sure, and its Tony who asks the questions that’s been on the readers’ minds, namely, “What’s the deal with you and Loki?”. Its something of a thesis statement.
“He raised a hand and crooked a finger, beckoning Steve. He didn’t really think about taking a step forward, but he took two toward Loki before he stopped, maybe a foot between them. He laughed, a little nervously.”
Loki’s bordering on erotic pear eating might be on Steve’s mind, calling back to the first time he thought of Loki in a romantic light. Here, the tension ramps up despite Steve’s nerves. Loki offers his hand, and Steve takes it, marking the beginning of whatever the hell its is that Steve and Loki become at this point, at least in Steve’s mind.
“He pushed the rest of the way down, smashing his lips to Loki’s with enthusiasm if not skill, and it felt right.”
Here’s Steve’s instincts again, which he’s relied on heavily in regards to his interactions with Loki up to this point. Tony discerned it before it happened, but now there is no turning back. He kisses Loki and is ensnared, whether he likes it or not.
“Dangerous, whispered a faint voice at the back of Steve’s mind, but most of him thrilled to it, his heart pounding against his ribs.”
Steve’s mind is full of what Loki can be, can do, his fantasies of a trust in him that Steve’s instincts nearly begged for. Of course, everything isn’t as it seems.
“He reached down, fingers wrapping around Steve’s cock, and squeezed so Steve arched up with a shout-And lurched into consciousness with his cock rock hard and his pulse pounding, for a moment still groping after a dream before he registered what was going on. Dreaming. He’d been dreaming, but it’d been so vivid-”
Not a truth, then, just a fiction. A dream. But what an incredible way to set up Steve’s attractions, to make clear just what it is his mind and body wants with Loki. Writing it off as a product of Tony’s words, Steve gives in anyways, surely thinking of Loki the whole way through his release.Tick Tick Time is the longest installment thus far, clocking in at almost 12k words. We get straight to it; the team has found out about Loki. This dates back to the installment before ‘its only a paper moon’, which was ‘the fog won’t lift in your town’. We find ourselves in the middle of an Avengers meeting, which definitely doesn’t go great, but could certainly be worse, at least from Steve’s point of view. Someone like Clint, on the other hand, might think this is more disastrous than any other present.
Onto Steve, alone in his room, pondering over everything from Loki’s nature, to his likeness spilled out over his sketching paper. He’s turned around by Loki having saved him. The implication of the thing trails into his dreams...or is Loki truly visiting him in his dreams? The reader wonders, and hopes. Loki is getting under Steve’s skin in such a way that he is left fretting over where Loki might be, if he is alright. For a month, this happens, and even someone of peak physical and mental stability (though the latter could be argued) might be driven in circles worrying. Of course, Loki appears again. Steve immediately asks where he’s been. The previous month of mixed up emotions has clearly gotten to him, and Loki, in his way, is surprised.
The slow burn continues. Each sentence leaves little bread crumbs, little markers of subtle increases of care and concern they have for one another. The characters themselves are completely oblivious, but a well minded reader who’s in it for the romance will certainly pick up on it. Again, however, the conversation comes back around to whether or not Loki might change his ways, change his modus operandi and make up for his ill made decisions. It's a common theme, to be sure, but in this context it is electric:
‘“They didn’t like it,” he said, “But yes, they accepted it.” He took a deep breath and then added, slowly, “If you gave them a chance to…”
“To what,” Loki said, unmistakably amused. “To glimpse my better nature?”
Steve pressed his lips together, feeling a prickle of frustration at the note in Loki’s voice. “You don’t need to make it sound as though the idea is so absurd. You’ve proven to me-”
“What have I proven to you?” Loki’s voice was suddenly quite sharp and he sat straight up. “What, other than my ability to carry on a civilized conversation? You attribute too much to a whim born of simple boredom.”
“Why are you so quick to tell me that I’m wrong?” Steve asked, the twinge of irritation becoming more definite. “It’s like you want me to assume the worst.”
Loki’s laugh was bright and sharp. “Hardly! I merely have little interest in hearing you grasp at straws to maintain your absurd hope that I will someday realize my sins and repent, casting myself on the mercy of such heroes as yourself.”’
The topic dies down, but the heat doesn’t. It’s becoming more clear that there is an underlying thread here.
‘Loki raised his eyebrows and cocked his head to the side. “You don’t like me turning up in your bed unannounced?”Steve had spent enough time with Tony to catch that one, and refused to acknowledge the warm flush he could feel spreading on his face.’
They set up a coffee date, and the ensuing conversation to get Loki to stay is met with that epithet again, ‘my good captain’. Steve seems somewhat taken with it, but he seems somewhat taken with Loki in general, so no surprise there. Loki proposes a half an hour, where Steve can ask what he wishes and he’ll get an answer. Its a kind of trope that’s found throughout literature. And, it’s a means to maybe suss out some things about Loki. It goes on not quite as expected, as Steve asks more mundane questions than exciting ones, at least in Loki’s estimation. Natasha is the chosen envoy, or seems to be, the next day. The Avengers will tolerate Loki’s interactions with Steve “for now”.
As Steve and Loki meet for their coffee ‘date’, the nuances of their responses to one another are clear in the narrative. And, all the more intriguing. Loki was present, again, at another Avengers battle and while Steve is initially irritated, Loki points out what a disaster it would be had Loki revealed himself.
Steve’s preoccupation with...well, rehabilitating Loki is as endearing as it is maddening. Likely, Loki would agree. Nevertheless, it is a hope Steve can’t help but hold out for, at least at this stage in the game. Remember, the series at this point was meant to be winding down. Such a huge shift in characterization would require more time, and so this joint coffee excursion halts Steve’s thoughts of turning Loki at least less morally questionable.The trust has built up enough to allow Steve to be more comfortable opening up. He admits he wants to talk to Loki, and goes on to talk about himself in pre-serum terms. Loki makes it about himself, missing the fact (or choosing to ignore, maybe) that Steve was not proselytizing and talks entirely too much about how is is what he is. It’s almost a tell, this penchant for driving home the base opinion of him.
A story for a story, Loki says, and offers one of retribution, again going back to what a terrible creature he must be. Is he pushing Steve’s buttons? Is he genuinely trying to make a point, here? The sympathetic reader might feel their heart twist in their chest, but ultimately its likely a test. How long until the good captain breaks character and gives up on him?Steve is awfully upset by the story, but he sidesteps his initial reactions to ask himself a very important question; Why tell me this? Steve sees through Loki straight away, seems to know Loki must’ve been baiting him. After a silence, Loki clearly marvels at Steve, and not for the first time either. It’s a wistful thought for him, the idea that Steve may have done some good on Asgard had he been Aesir, and Steve is understandably thoughtful at the notion.
Our final scene in Tick Tick Time cuts right to the chase. Loki has come to warn Steve of literal impending Doom. The argument that follows is a back and forth and ups the ante emotionally. Steve, being Steve, can’t understand why Loki would take up with Doom, come to tell him of Doom’s plans, and still not think of himself positively. In short order the argument provides us with some glimpses into what Loki has been doing, which will start to further unfold for us soon. Steve is left with a sense of failure, and we are left to wonder where this twist will take us next.
The next stop is an interlude, a look into Loki’s side of things. The summary for this installment is succinct; “Loki needs to get rid of this inconvenient Captain America Problem”. Loki picks up a man named William at a bar of some sort who has passing similarity to Steve. It’s not an uncommon scene in fanfiction, but it is infused with Loki’s internal ponderings which the audience has been hopeful for. Even in this simple way, we can see where Loki is emotionally fraying around the edges. “He will exorcise this need from himself, Loki thinks. This mad obsession.” Note this quotation says ‘exorcise’, a darker, deeper mindset than the alternative you might initially misread, ‘exercise’.
This is a big step for Loki. It ends in his belated realization that Steve is in his bones, now, and there’s nothing for it. Perhaps his plan backfired, or maybe it simply revealed a truth, but it is a satisfying read. We know where Loki’s head is, where his heart is, and everything else. This is more than just a curiosity for him, this is more than a game. In this temporary moment, Loki’s hunger for Steve is established.
Now that that is settled, we continue forward in ‘The sun no longer shines (on your side)’ with the backdrop of Doom’s attack. After the fact, Loki shows up unexpectedly, as he is wont to do, and Steve is somewhat exasperated. Lise’s ability to keep the same premise (Loki’s popping in and out of Steve’s life) in nearly every installment fresh is impressive, and part of what makes the read so good. With every meeting, there is another underlying layer of basically every tension between them, and with every meeting, we are hooked again and again to see what might be uncovered or divulged. The theme is generally the same; Loki’s sneakiness, his trickery, to Steve’s nobleness and stoutheartedness. One expects them to hate each other before the end of it but on the contrary, they seem even more drawn to one another.
Their philosophical see-sawing gives way to Loki asking if he’s seeing anyone. Given the segment before this particular fic, your heart breaks for Loki. Why would he ask such a thing? Steve’s sure confused by it. He asks if this is a test, which implies a certain kind of paranoia. He wants to trust Loki, but he can’t quite get there. And honestly, who can blame him?
“He found himself almost glad of that, that he got to have this private, special (bizarre) thing, whatever it was.”
Steve’s affection for Loki is clear later on. His thoughts are constantly turning towards Loki, and it appears maybe Loki isn’t the only one with a fascination here. When he makes his appearance, Loki seems lighthearted to Steve, perhaps just in contrast. Quickly the reason for his visit is revealed; he asks Steve to dinner. Visibly anxious when Steve goes on the defense, your heart breaks for the Loki we saw in the previous installment. Steve agrees, and Loki suggests that it was a hard won dinner, an important nugget for later on.Tony shows up, apparently still working on figuring his way through how Loki’s magic works. It’s a nice segue into Steve asking after a classier outfit, and Tony noodles out what’s really going on. A date, it seems, and the scene turns to Steve waiting for Loki. The lead in is perfect. One gets the sense that Loki is obviously up to something, but experiencing it from Steve’s bashful confusion makes the scene.
““Never fear.” Loki’s eyes glittered slightly in the dim light. “I shall look after you with the most tender of care.” A bizarre, tingly feeling trailed down his spine as Steve blinked.”
It’s another one of those pear moments, Steve responding to something Loki has done or said with pleasure.The ‘date’ seems to go well, except for the whole topic of Doom of course. At a later point, Loki reappears and nearly gets a skillet to the face for his trouble. The banter is familiar, until Loki remarks on how honestly good Steve is. Where he expected a certain corruptible center, Loki has found the opposite with Steve.
““I told myself it was but curiosity,” Loki said, and took a strangely prowling step in Steve’s direction, and then another. “What strangeness, after all. Surely beneath your shining exterior was a rotten core that I could bring to the surface. Why not? There always is.””
Loki sees Steve for who and what he is, beyond just the visage of Captain America, and its someone he craves.
““I would have you,” Loki said, his voice lower still. “And seldom do I fail in getting what I want.””
They kiss, at long last, and it’s a natural thing. The build up is minimal, you see it coming, presumably so the thing stays natural. It is a heated few minutes, cut short by...something. What, precisely, we don’t know, and Steve is left uncomfortably aroused. Loki promises to return and pick up where he left off, steals another kiss, and is gone. This time, it was real. The kisses were real, Loki’s intentions seem to be pure as he insists he’s not meaning to toy with Steve.Weeks pass, and the next that Steve hears from Loki is via JARVIS. Loki’s in the tower, unconscious. The team doesn’t argue (that much), and Steve is greeted to a gruesome sight and scent; blood. Excessive amounts of blood. Loki wakes and there’s some relief in the fact that he is himself, spiteful and full of sardonic laughter. Steve races to help, and we’re left with a cliffhanger of uncomfortable proportions.
ESSAY 2 FIRST DRAFT DONE AND COMMENTARY FINISHED READY TO SUBMIT! One more day of looking at this bastard essay tomorrow just to reword and restructure a bit, add references and bibliography and then I can start preparing for my actual exams on Tues and Wed 😭 I can't even think beyond then tbh but man I'm proud of myself for getting it done with enough time! Now for a catch up with Nanna Ann, a big bowl of Matthew's chickpea curry, and a soak in the bath. I wanted to do a little workout but I don't honestly think I have time by the time I spend 40 mins on the phone and then eat dinner hopefully around 8. Maybe we'll get out for a quick evening walk. Anyway I look rough as hell so here is a pic of my little basil plant Barry, who is thriving unlike me 😂 Need to prune him tomorrow before he starts falling over himself. Happy weekend!
The overturning of CHEVRON happened on June 28, and it affects how regulatory agencies make their regulations, such as the FDA. This means that companies could put ingredients that can harm us into our food. This includes meat produce.
It also affects how drugs are approved for medical use, how sanitary regulations are made, could decrease the amount of worker protections we have. This is because local judges can make the decisions on what regulations are allowed and which ones will be thrown out.
Local governments are NOT qualified to make these decisions, the ones who actually are qualified, the doctors and scientists, no longer are in charge of making the regulations.
This could affect how air and land pollution is prevented, affecting the health of thousands in this country and possibly others.
This could affect how sanitary regulations in restaurants are made.
In truth, this will only harm the people, because it doesn’t allow the experts to make the decisions, and instead gives all the power to the Judiciary Branch of the US Government.
To: Shawn Halifax, Executive Director of Woodlawn Plantation, Alexandria, Virginia,
From: Njideka Maduakor, Sophomore Biology Major Chem Minor, Howard University,
Washington, DC
Date: February 27, 2022
Subject: Reduce and Reuse. A plan to restructure the Woodlawn Plantation site.
Purpose: The purpose of this proposal is to recommend first taking a further critical look at the wedding expenses. Then after you have restructured the expenses of the site, replace it with whatever revenue is absolutely necessary to keep the plantation in good standing, financially and morally. By transitioning away from weddings over the course of a few years, Woodlawn site coordinators can evaluate the cost of maintenance and potentially replace weddings with an event equivalent-though potentially not as profitable as weddings currently are.
Problem Description: Shawn Halifax requested Howard University Students in the ENG-009 Tech writing course to propose a solution to replace wedding events on Woodlawn Plantation in Alexandria Virginia. These weddings account for 34% of the plantation's income. Weddings on plantations are problematic. While it is George Washington's estate, it once housed 155 enslaved people. With the majority of the weddings being hosted by white Americans, it is culturally tone deaf to have such a celebration where so much inhumane suffering occurred. Murder, rape, torture, all just some of the horrific things blacks were subjected too on those grounds. Woodlawn’s current mission is to “Engage with our community to preserve history and care for nature at this former site of enslavement…promote sustainable practices, nurture wellbeing, and contribute to community repair.” Weddings do not align with the mission of the site and in fact- no matter the demographic- is actively against the mission.
Proposed Solution: I propose a slow and steady approach to the problem. After a discussion with Shawn Halifax, he already expressed interest in looking at requests for weddings with more scrutiny. I do not agree with this potential idea. Instead, start reducing the number of weddings. If 25 weddings are held during the wedding season, next year make it 20, the year after that make it 10, and so on and so forth. As the years pass, assign a cost benefit analyst. Keep track of all the upfront costs, unexpected costs,tangible costs, intangible costs and ongoing or future costs, as well as for the rest of the revenue where that money is being put down. Finally consider how much of the costs are actually going to the maintenance of the site. Discovering which areas can be as subsidized or reduced. Replacement of weddings can be done with community events, school events, collaborations with Howard, or anything that may be equivalent to whatever costs may be necessary when weddings are gone. Community events could include; Farmers markets or Spotlight nights. School events could include classes, Critical race theory classes, educational tours, or student cleanup projects to help with maintenance. These events could be run by Woodlawn staff, or have a representative from the community as a way to provide a job position.
Alternative Solution: The alternative solution is to possibly not remove weddings at all, but as part of your mission to inform and collaborate. Make sure that both the wedding planners and the guests have full understanding of the location. Maybe offer a tour, or a pamphlet encouraging guests to treat the land delicately and send donations of their own accord to your program. Of course this would happen during the wedding, or before the wedding starts so people can contextualize the location. This may help in the future dissuade people from continuing to have weddings at this location.
Budget and Timeline: Unless a similar position is already filled, a cost benefit analyst will need to be hired, the job pay rate averages from 53k - 103k a year. On to the costs of weddings you will need a full breakdown of where the costs are going. ‘Upkeep’ could be a wide range of things. This plan could stretch between five years, with a reduction of 5 weddings per year, or a seven year plan with a reduction of 3 weddings per year. Woodlawn Plantation operating budget was likely around $1,023,153.21 last year, based on budgets from previous years and accounting for inflation. 34% of that money is equivalent to $347 872.10 US Dollars.which means if twenty five weddings are hosted, one wedding needs to cover $13,914.88. According to eventective.com micro weddings with only 25 guests can cost upwards of $10,000 dollars. Huge weddings with over 300 + guests on average are $25,000 dollars. This potentially signals places where costs could be cut as weddings are slowly reduced, and would need further analysis and full breakdown of operations budgets with the woodlawn board.
The budget regarding post restructure events will mostly be up to Woodlawn. Though the cost for a ticket to a plantation tour can cost anywhere from 79-100 USD according to similar sites pricing. At the current costs that weddings cover that would require around 3,500 guests a year to match the pricing. It seems unrealistic, but if the budget could be reduced to only need 3,000 or even 2,000 that could create an easier to overcome hurdle. With the amount of weddings hosted, Woodlawn already receives at least 7,000 guests. It is already a popular site in Washington D.C which makes it all the more likely they could sell tickets at that price and still have visitors.
Experience: I am put in a unique position as a Howard student, that is first generation African American that did not descend from slavery. I was personally appalled by the mere suggestion, even though I have no connection to these sites I can deeply empathize with the feelings of those who were victimized at woodlawn.
Conclusion: The journey to eliminate a problematic practice is a long one. Replacing weddings with any other events will be difficult, many people would likely not come to a plantation for any other reason. Perhaps with the implementation of this proposal you may be able to delay the search for a suitable replacement.
Traditionally in science fiction, aliens have been used as an allegory for the “other.” The weight of Immigrants, foreigners, political movements, and identities have leaned on extraterrestrials to tell their stories at some point. While a valuable tool, allegory and symbolism can only ever act as stand-ins for real representation. Roswell, New Mexico, is a show about three (white) aliens who are discovering their identities after crash landing in the United States near the U.S.-Mexico border. They are befriended and helped by other young adults from Roswell, the main character being Liz Ortecho, the daughter of an undocumented immigrant. By including an authentic undocumented experience through the Ortecho family, Roswell, New Mexico provides much needed representation for the undocumented story, but also exposes the difference between the white and non-white immigrantion struggle.
The aliens in Roswell, New Mexico, are technically immigrants, which creates an interesting dichotomy between the aliens, who immigrated from another planet, and the actual human immigrants in the show, who came to roswell from just a few miles south in Mexico. Both arrived in the United States without documentation and yet are treated very differently. The aliens in Roswell, New Mexico show the difference between the white and non-white immigration experience. There is no mention of how Michael, Max, and Isobel received their documentation, while Arturo Ortecho is still applying and struggling to gain his citizenship after living and owning a business in the United States for Liz’s entire life. While the aliens are running from secret government organizations and have to hide their other-worldly identities, there is a different kind of threat for Liz’s family, who has to live in fear of ICE and Arturo’s discovery every day. Not only is Liz’s family subject to the very real threat of ICE, but they also face descrimination from other Roswell citizens. Their family diner is shot up within the first few minutes of the pilot episode, setting the tone for the racist attacks that plague the Ortecho family for the rest of the show. The aliens also face similar attacks from the Manes family, who come after them because of their non-human-ness, but the threats the aliens face are all fictional and specific to the show. Though both undocumented, the alien’s whiteness allows them to assimilate into the Roswell community welcomed with open arms. To the average passerby, Michael, Max, and Isobel would not be given a second thought. Liz, even though a legal citizen, still faces racism from Wyatt and other Roswell citizens because of her skin color.
The true undocumented experience is rarely portrayed in media, with characters often being used only for their immigration status. Roswell, New Mexico does a great job of exposing viewers to the daily struggles of undocumented families. Jeanie Mason, the actress who plays Liz Ortecho, was approached by a little girl who’s parents are also undocumented and was so amazed that she could see herself in Jeanie’s character. Roswell, New Mexico’s fight for representation reaches not only the casual viewer, who gains insight and empathy for the undocumented experience, but also viewers who are undocumented, and can now see themselves represented in media.
In any era of change, there is a reaction against the changes that are surrounding the public at large. In the 1920s, change was obvious as, for the first time, more Americans lived in cities than on farms, women asserted their independence in multiple ways, many flaunted the law in speak easies and yet others began to crack open the way for African Americans…