#eternal lessons

[mybeautifulchristianjourney]

God's Gentle Whisper

by Aiden Wilson Tozer

There are truths that can never be learned except in the noise and confusion of the market place or in the tough brutality of combat. The tumult and the shouting teach their own rough lessons. No man is quite a man who has not been to the school of work and war, who has not heard the cry at birth and the sigh at life's parting. But there is another school where the soul must go to learn its best eternal lessons. It is the school of silence. Be still and know, said the psalmist, and there is a profound philosophy there, of universal application. Prayer among evangelical Christians is always in danger of degenerating into a glorified gold rush. Almost every book on prayer deals with the get element mainly. How to get things we want from God occupies most of the space. Now, we gladly admit that we may ask for and receive specific gifts and benefits in answer to prayer, but we must never forget that the highest kind of prayer is never the making of requests. Prayer at its holiest moment is the entering into God to a place of such blessed union as makes miracles seem tame and remarkable answers to prayer appear something very far short of wonderful by comparison.

[addymantra]

Eternal Lessons #2

The working world is the hardest thing to deal with as an adolescent. There is little comfort in knowing others like you are going through the same thing, because the crisis is very real mentally and the pressure is immensely real when you're burdened with tuition fees and just simple things like a car to get you to and from work.

The quarter life crisis is very real: not knowing wtf you're gonna do with your life, how you're gonna make money, how to even be happy.

I'm probably like a lot of people, who've worked shitty minimum wage jobs to make a fraction of what you owe to institutions, dealt with managers who had no respect for you, and stared at the clock wondering when this would all end.

And the worst part is, you're told to just suck it up. This is the real world, and you have to get used to it. To not do so is weakness, immaturity.

I look at all these shitty jobs now, having to put up with them for now, and it might be a lesson the universe keeps throwing at me. To strengthen me, teach me tolerance and compassion even to those who hurt me.

But is it so wrong to just want respect at your workplace, and assurance in a career after going insane chasing degrees?

I feel like I have a $50,000 (no exaggeration) sign floating over my head and it bleeds red with money I don't have, a future I'm unsure of, and a life I wish I took control of when I had the chance.

Had I been not afraid of defying my parents and following their wish for me to go to university, would I be happier? I was too young to know what I wanted, too rushed to become something to even savour existing. But maybe there's no point in regretting now, and I should just play the cards I was dealt.

Or make up my own game and win everytime.

I have about a year and a half until I graduate, and I'm half excited, half terrified.

Excited to finally seize control of my life, say enough is enough, I did my part and now I'm ready to pursue what I instinctively feel is right for me.

Terrified because I'm still a child deep down and my spirit despises confinement to imaginary boundaries like time, borders, laws, prices, and social codes.

A good friend of mine once said to me,

"I've made it my priority to be happy."

And for the first time in a long time, after searching for possible careers, internships, all that productive bullshit, nothing else made more sense.

Something so simple yet so beautiful.

I repeat it to myself nearly everyday, it keeps me sane.

You know that feeling when you're just completely in your zone, and you just keep going with whatever you're doing, adding this, adjusting that, and you just follow the flow that is the synergy between your mind and hands?

Whether it be cooking, painting, building something, making love - it doesn't necessarily have to be society's idea of productive to make you happy. But it's that feeling of, "damn, this feels right, I could do this forever." or doing nothing at all, that is happiness.

[addymantra]

Eternal Lessons #1

Tumblr is such a weird thing. You'll see a post that says Personality > Appearances but see like 20+ pics/gifs of hot skinny girls. The eye is drawn to physical attraction at first sight but it's not until you start talking to someone that you can see if you are compatible at all. I've decided that the desire to be sexy is an external influence, it can be internalized and plague me deeply or I can feel good inside out. Some days are different than others, but that's all part of being a woman in these weird ass times. I've also learned I'm not one to flaunt, and I shouldn't be hurt over the fact that I choose not to. I have nothing against it so much anymore, it's just I'd rather have people like me for the funny shit I do or the food I cook or something. Anything else but fall in love with mere skin and an enhanced face that isn't mine. I don't know how to define beauty, I don't even know if sexy should be in vocabulary, but self-love definitely exists when you cancel out the noise and look at yourself without thinking about how others see you, or how you look in pictures.