#etml

[owlways-and-forever]

A/N: I feel like a lot of the fic I read (and write) centers around Emma, and paints Killian as a pining and/or doting partner, and we never really get to see the angry pirate side of him. I wanted to experiment with something different, so this piece aspires to be more Killian-centric and a little bit darker. Hopefully it comes out as what I imagine it to be. Warning, graphic depictions of violence ahead. American Assassin inspired AU.

Summary: After tragedy tears his life apart, Killian Jones is determined to exact revenge on the ones who wronged him. But his path to revenge turns out to be a winding one, filled with surprising characters that may even change his life again.

Word Count: 1306

Links: ao3, ff.net

Prologue

Killian toyed with the ring in his pocket while he waited for the bartender to make their drinks. He'd spent a considerable amount of time thinking about how he'd do this, but he hadn't been able to come to a decision. Putting the ring in the drink seemed a little too cheesy, not to mention a choking hazard, but he wanted to present it in some special way, not just hand it to her like a bar of chocolate.

The bartender set two drinks down in front of him, and as Killian's eyes took in the large, tropical flowers sitting atop each, he knew what he wanted to do. Carefully, he pulled the ring from his pocket and balanced it in the center of the flower, threading the pistil through it. Smiling he turned and located Milah on the beach, where she was emerging from the water, hands running over her dark curls. She smiled when she saw him and jogged toward him, accepting her drink while keeping her eyes locked on his, and he placed his hands on her waist, pulling her closer. Milah's eyes flicked down as she went to take a sip of her drink, and the shine of the ring caught her attention at last.

"Killian?" she asked, her voice brimming with surprise.

"Milah, my love," he said, taking her free hand in his, "you are everything I could ever need in this world and so much more. You brought me out of the darkness and showed me that life could be more than just loss. You're my one true love, and there's no one else I would rather travel the world with. I never want to be parted from you. Will you," he continued, dropping to one knee, "allow me the honour of becoming your husband?"

"Are you serious?" Milah exclaimed, her eyes glistening with tears. "Are you really serious?"

"Is that a yes?" he asked, nerves practically paralyzing him.

"Yes, of course that's a yes!" she nearly squealed, falling into his arms as he stood and peppered her face with kisses.

Killian took the ring and slipped it onto Milah's finger, and she pressed a long kiss against his lips. He opened his mouth under the pressure and was only dimly aware of the applause coming from the people around them.

After a few moments, they broke apart, and Milah buried her face in his neck, laughing happily.

"I should go get the camera," Killian whispered to the top of her head, his heart pounding with joy.

"Okay," Milah agreed, stepping away. She took his cup and lay down in one of the lounging chairs.

Killian took a moment to appreciate how beautiful she looked before jogging off in the direction of the hotel. As he went, he noticed a speedboat zooming across the shallows, sending waves across the sand. Boats themselves weren't unusual, but it was the first time he had seen one so close to the beach. There was nothing sinister about a speedboat, however, so Killian simply kept moving, wanting to get up to their room and grab the camera as quickly as possible so he could return to celebrating.

Just as Killian was wrapping his hand around the hand of the door, he hear a barrage of gunshots, and he turned to see bullets spraying across the beach, striking down one person after another. Fear gripped him, and he turned immediately to run back toward Milah, but people were running everywhere, and he could no longer see where she was. Her brown curls blended into the crowd of people and despite his best efforts, he couldn't seem to locate her.

"Milah!" he screamed at the top of his lungs, trying desperately to be heard over the hundreds of other people calling for their loved ones. "Milah!"

As he ran towards the spot where he had left her, his feet began to grow damp with the blood that was spreading out from the fallen, stained pink sand sticking to his skin. Suddenly, piercing pain shot through his shoulder and chest, spreading down through his abdomen and arm to the tips of his fingers. He screamed in pain and collapsed to his knees in the sand, blood dripping down his bare chest from the wound in his shoulder. Still, his thoughts focused on Milah, and he pushed through the pain, standing and continuing to run, trying desperately to find her.

At last, he caught a glimpse of long black curls down by the hotel's pool, and he sprinted toward her, vaguely aware that we was running towards the shooters. It didn't matter, as long as he was with Milah. He was feet away, so close to her, when he saw her body lurch forward with the impact of being hit, and a guttural cry was ripped from his chest as he watched her fall into the pool. Killian pushed his body harder to reach her, to pull her from the water that was already turning pink with her blood. He was almost there when pain seared through him again, this time knocking him down as his thigh was shredded by a bullet. He tried, but he couldn't stand, so he crawled, half dragging his leg behind him, to get closer to the pool. Another shot and another bullet found its target, this time burying itself in his hip. He was reduced to trying to army crawl his way, leaving a smearing trail of red behind him, but he was rapidly losing strength, and he felt his mind beginning to cloud as unconsciousness threatened.

"Milah," Killian croaked, tears pouring down his face. He was going to die, he was certain of it, and either Milah would follow him, or she would be left behind, and he knew all too well the pain of that.

"Vasha zhena?" a burly looking man with a rifle sneered from above Killian, and he turned his head enough to see the man leering at Milah. "Ona krasivaya."

He ran a hand over himself in a way that made Killian want to vomit and bash his head in, or maybe castrate him, all at once. With a chuckle, he knelt down and grabbed Killian's hair, roughly tugging his head up so he had a clear view of Milah, while he aimed his gun and shot right through Milah's forehead.

Killian let out a choked sob and one arm reached out toward Milah, and he barely even registered the pain as another bullet tore through his hand. The monster still holding him laughed and released Killian roughly, taking a step toward the edge of the pool. Killian watched as he pulled a phone from his pocket, and aimed it toward Milah's body.

"For to remember her tonight," the man said with a twisted smile, and Killian heard the camera click and closed his eyes. "Do svidaniya," he sneered, aiming his heavy boots at Killian's side and kicking him hard into the pool as he walked away.

The edges of Killian's vision were starting to darken, and he knew that if he didn't get out of the water, he would bleed to death very quickly. It was tempting, just to let go, allow himself to follow his parents and his brother and now Milah. He felt so empty inside, as if someone had just carved out his heart. But in it's place he also felt a boiling rage, coursing through his blood and enveloping what consciousness remained to him. He let it propel him as he used his good arm to pull himself through the water to the stairs, where he was able to heave himself onto the top step, just high enough to keep is wounds out of the water. The effort drained last of his energy, and he allowed himself to succumb to the darkness.

[owlways-and-forever]

A/N: This is a relatively short chapter, but it felt like a good place to break things up, so here it is. There's a brief description of trauma, but that's about it. I hope you guys are all ready to meet a new character! Enjoy!

Summary: After tragedy tears his life apart, Killian Jones is determined to exact revenge on the ones who wronged him. But his path to revenge turns out to be a winding one, filled with surprising characters that may even change his life again. American Assassin inspired AU.

Tagging: @killian-whump​, @hollyethecurious​

Word Count: 1010 (3791)

Links: ao3, ff.net, (tumblr) Prologue, Ch 1

Chapter 2: Chosen

Killian sat at the cold metal table, resisting the urge to drum his fingers against the top in his impatience. He had been interrogated four times already, and he knew they were trying to decide whether he was terrorist or completely insane, or perhaps both, but Killian was neither. Every move he had made had been coolly calculated and he would have succeeded if they hadn't derailed his plans entirely and he was positively seething like a cauldron ready to bubble over.

The door to the "interview room", as they liked to call it, opened, and a new woman walked through, her heels clacking against the floor as she flicked through the manila file in her well-manicured hands. After a moment in which she paid Killian no attention and he waited silently, the woman dropped the closed file on the table and smoothed her tight-fitting dress before sitting down across from him.

"Do you have any idea how long you've been here?" she asked after considering him for another moment.

"One hundred forty-one hours, if I had to guess," Killian answered, cracking the knuckles in his fingers.

"Forty-two, actually," the woman corrected, but a raised eyebrow indicated that she was more than a little impressed. She paused as if waiting for him to offer an explanation, but he did nothing of the sort, instead continuing to stare at her defiantly. "My name," she continued, "is Regina Mills, I am the Deputy Director for Operations, which means that –"

"You're in charge of all the spies," Killian finished, and he thought he might have seen the corners of her mouth twitch upward.

"We don't have spies, Mr. Jones, this isn't the Cold War," she sneered, and Killian rolled his eyes.

"Right, agents, operatives, whatever it is you call them now."

"My job is to manage the collection and analysis of intelligence," Ms. Mills continued, undeterred.

"Must not be doing a very good job if you needed to follow my lead into Donetsk," Killian spat, clenching his fists.

"Or, we managed to do a great job, since we were able to locate a nobody in Seattle and track him all the way to a warehouse in Ukraine," she countered.

"I did all the work for you," Killian challenged, bristling for a fight.

"Mr. Jones, I know the world sucks, and your parents were murdered when you were eight, and your brother was killed in action, and your fiancée was shot in the head by terrorists, so you think that god hates you and all you have to live for is revenge. I get it."

"No, you don't," Killian mumbled, anger boiling inside of him and he felt his temperature rising.

"Trust me, I do, but that doesn't mean you get to go around –"

"YOU HAVE NO IDEA!" Killian screamed, his arms straining against his handcuffs, muscles bulging under his t-shirt. "SHE WAS EVERYTHING TO ME, EVERYTHING! I HAD NOTHING EXCEPT HER AND THAT MONSTER…"

"I DO KNOW!" Ms. Mills yelled back, standing and slamming her hands down on the metal table. "My husband was tortured, in front of me, and my uterus was removed with my baby inside while I watched, and nothing, nothing, will every compare to that, so don't you talk about loss to me," she hissed, her black eyes narrowing, and for the first time, Killian genuinely felt intimidated by the woman in front of him, with power and barely-controlled rage radiating from her.

"I'm –"

"I went on my own revenge warpath, and listen to me when I tell you that it is a mistake," she continued. "What was your plan? After you killed the man who murdered Milah, what were you going to do next?"

Killian said nothing, because he didn't have an answer. He had never really considered that far, and if he was honest with himself it was because he never expected to get that far before he died.

"Oh I see, you're the die trying kind?" she smirked, cold and cruel. "You always expected to be killed trying to achieve your goal, so there was no plan for what happens next. Genius, really, you are. But hey, at least you knew your stupid ass was probably going to be killed."

Killian looked down at his hands, cuffed in his lap, knuckles bruised, and was surprised to find that he felt shame prickling in his gut.

"I think you might be a good fit for one of our operations," Ms. Mills stated, after taking a deep breath.

"No," Killian huffed, not wanting to hear her sales pitch about becoming a better man or patriotic duty or whatever she was planning to say.

"It's black ops, codenamed Paladin, and the purpose of it is to identify and neutralize active terrorists who pose a threat to national security," she continued as though she hadn't heard him.

"No," he repeated more firmly, his eyes firmly focused on his hands.

"Mr. Jones, it is high time you got over yourself, and started channeling your rage, hatred, and survivor's guilt into something that is useful for the rest of society," Ms. Mills stated, her hand on her hip as she tossed a stack of papers from inside his file down in front of him. "Either you get on board or you spend the next fifty years in solitary confinement, I don't really care which."

She turned and swept out of the room, her heels clicking on the floor again, and when the door closed behind her, Killian reached out an gently ran his fingertips over the ink, feeling the slight bumps of the letters. It wasn't really a difficult choice, he knew the answer was obvious, but it was taking a lot from him to pick up the pen and sign the papers in front of him. He allowed himself a minute before he told himself to knuckle down and pull himself together, and then Killian Jones picked up the pen in front of him and signed his name across the blank line at the bottom of the agreement.

[owlways-and-forever]

A/N: Thank you so much for all your patience and especially for all your positive feedback. I guess this story is something a lot of people wanted, and I’m happy to fill the niche, and hopefully I can give you guys all what you want.

Summary: After tragedy tears his life apart, Killian Jones is determined to exact revenge on the ones who wronged him. But his path to revenge turns out to be a winding one, filled with surprising characters that may even change his life again. American Assassin inspired AU.

Tagging: @killian-whump​, @hollyethecurious​

Word Count: 1480 (2784)

Links: ao3, ff.net, (tumblr) Prologue

Chapter 1: Caught

Killian dragged himself out of bed at 6:00, rolling away from the girl splayed out next to him under the sheets, bare legs and arms peeking out. He cast a cursory glance in her direction, trying to remember her name – Anna? Or perhaps it was Kate? He shook his head as he grabbed a pair of shorts and pulled them on. It didn’t really matter what her name was, in all likelihood, he would never see her again. It was a routine of sorts, taking home a new woman each night and then leaving for his usual run before she woke up, so he could return home and continue his training in peace. Killian laced up his shoes and quickly gulped down some water before he left stretching his legs as he made his way down the stairs of his apartment building.

It took Killian a little over an hour to finish his customary 10-mile morning run, slower than his usual pace, and when he made it back to his apartment, he felt frustration boiling inside him. Immediately, he grabbed the thick foam wrap and the heavy athletic tape from the coffee table and began delicately wrapping his hands. He never bothered with all the fancy stuff, since it wasn’t exactly boxing he was training for, but he did take some precautions. There was no sense in getting injured before he could accomplish his mission. He cracked his neck and began pounding away at the heavy bag, and time seemed to bleed away into nothing as he worked.

After some time, Killian heard the private messaging app on his computer chirp, alerting him that his contact was back online. He grabbed a towel and wiped the sweat from his forehead, chest, and neck, and then sat down in front of the monitor. The icon showed a new message waiting for him, and he poured himself a tumbler of rum as he clicked on the glowing envelope.

The Pushkin. Donetsk. Two days. Noon.

Killian barely finished reading the message before he was vaulting out of his seat and stuffing his belongings into a rucksack, pulling on clean clothes as he moved. He had less than 48 hours to get to Ukraine, or the opportunity he had been waiting so long for would slip right through his fingers. The months of being tested and having to prove himself at every stage, all so that he could find himself face to face with Zloto, the head of the organization. He had so many burning questions, and Zloto was the only one who could provide the answers.

His fingers brushed over the picture of Milah he kept on the windowsill next to his bed, the only personal item in his studio apartment, and he closed his eyes as the pain swept through him like a tidal wave. He clenched his teeth and used the pain to stoke the fire in his belly. It was rare that Killian didn’t feel a seething anger within him, but Milah’s picture was unfailingly enough to ignite a spark anytime he felt it fade. He grabbed his phone and wallet and stuffed them in the pockets of his hoodie and then headed out the door.

It had started to drizzle outside, and Killian vaguely enjoyed the light tapping of the raindrops on his skin as he walked toward the metro station. He felt like he was always on fire, as if the rage that boiled inside of him actually heated him up. Idly, Killian wondered if others could see steam coming off of him as the drops of rain touched his skin.

Killian’s flight landed in Ukraine and he tapped his feet impatiently, checking his watch. He felt like a ball of energy, or perhaps a ball of tension, as he waited for his rental car and drove to Donetsk. Only the thought of Milah, the image of her blood seeping out into the pool, kept his mind focused on the task at hand. He arrived at The Pushkin a few hours before his meeting was scheduled, so he walked around the city for a little while, noting the chaos that seemed to envelope it. Killian knew the city was a warzone, it was part of his preparation, but there was something different about seeing a warzone with your own eyes. It made the hollowness from his brother’s loss ache painfully, imagining Liam’s last moments spent fearfully in a place like this.

At last noon arrived, and Killian made sure he was sitting at a visible table, his back to the wall so no one could sneak up on him, and he surreptitiously sipped a glass of water that had been placed in front of him. It tasted unpleasantly of copper and it reminded him of the way blood tasted on his lips, and he hoped it wasn’t a premonition of the way his day was going to go.

Precisely nine minutes past noon, his waiter slipped a note onto the table with another address, and Killian ducked out of the restaurant, careful to remain inconspicuous. He made his way to the new address – a seemingly abandoned building that looked as though it had taken a shelling. He kept his eyes peeled as he picked his way through the rubble, looking for any sign of an ambush. Inside the building were too large, brawny men flanking a doorway, and Killian approached them slowly, trying to make it clear that he was on their side. Their hands tightened on the rifles they clutched, but the lackey on the left nodded to Killian as he passed between them. He sensed movement behind him, but before he could react, he felt the butt of the lackey’s rifle connect with the base of his skull, and he dropped to the ground, his vision going black.

Killian came to somewhere deep within the bowels of the building, his arms and legs strapped to a chair in the middle of the room, and he almost laughed at the idea that this would bind him. As if he hadn’t practiced escaping this kind of restraint a hundred times before. A door behind him opened, and Killian heard several sets of footsteps approaching his position, and he waited, not sure whether to expect words or a blow. The scraping of a chair against the floor told Killian that at least one of his new companions had pulled up a chair behind him, but still nothing happened, and they continued to sit in silence.

“Gde Zloto?” Killian demanded, his impatience getting the better of him as the silence persisted. “Where’s Zloto?”

“Do you think ve vould really bring spy like you to Zloto?” a deep voice challenged in its thick Russian accent, laughing heartily, and Killian’s eyes closed briefly as he processed his situation.

“I’m not a spy,” Killian hissed, his fingers tightening around the arms of his chair.

“Naturally,” the voice answered, and Killian got the sense that it’s owner was leaning back in his chair, entirely at ease with the situation. “Tell me, rat, what do you vant from us?”

“Chaos,” Killian supplied, and without warning, the butt of another rifle crashed into his temple, making his ears ring and his head throb painfully, but Killian breathed in through his nose and blocked it out.

“Try again. Truth this time.”

“I want only chaos,” Killian persisted, and he was met with a growl of aggravation.

He prepared himself for another blow, but instead his ears were met with a cacophony of sound as the room ignited with gunfire and shattering glass. Killian looked up, ignoring the shards of glass that were flying, leaving small scrapes against his skin, and saw for the first time that there was a hole in the ceiling that had been crudely covered with a glass pane. Men dressed in black special ops gear were plunging through the hole made by the shattered pane, their rifles belching bullets that found their targets in the brutes standing behind Killian.

“NO!” he snarled, struggling free of his bonds and rushing at one of the soldiers in front of him, tackling him to the ground.

To his credit, Killian put up a better fight than most people this strike team encountered, but he was still woefully overmatched. It took only a few minutes before he found himself pinned, face down on the gritty floor, his arms twisted behind him and a knee pressed painfully into his sciatic nerve.

“Alright cowboy, time to go home, you’re in some deep shit,” the soldier on top of Killian grunted, manhandling him as he tugged Killian to his feet.

“I prefer dashing rapscallion,” Killian spat, his blue eyes like icicles trying to pierce the soldier’s armour.

“Let’s see how dashing you are after Regina gets her hands on you,” he snorted, shoving Killian toward the door.    

[owlways-and-forever]

Hey there! Wanted to pop in and ask how things with Enter the Morning Light are going. I absolutely LOVED the first chapter and I'm so eager for more! I know the muse can be finicky, so please don't see this as a pressure ask! Just wanted you to know how much I enjoyed it. I know that feedback is the ambrosia my muse feasts upon, so I'm hoping yours will enjoy this morsel of love, too ;o)

Hey there! Thanks so much for checking in! The next chapter is like, halfway written, I’m just having trouble getting it to the next part. There’s like, some filer that is needed to set stuff up to happen, but idk, it just doesn’t want to come out. But rest assured, the next chapter is coming! Ideally I’ll have it done by the end of the week, and who knows, maybe now I’ll even find the motivation to keep writing tonight :) <3

[groovetrill]

I'll never say never again

I'll never say never

I'll never say never again

I'll never say never

I'll never say never again

The music brings me right back

And you know that

And you know that

I got the answers in me

Tell me, tell me, tell me, tell me

[owlways-and-forever]

@hollyethecurious replied to your post “Enter the Morning Light - Prologue”

Amazing! Just left you a comment on ao3, but thought I’d ask here, too. Will you please tag me in your updates?

Thank you so much :D <3 :D and yes, of course!!

[lechugafl]

lechuga crisper 2014/08

Basement Jaxx’s “Never Say Never” (feat. ETML)

For fans of Daft Punk, Fat Boy Slim, Chromeo, Cassius, Groove Armada, The Chemical Brothers, Simian Mobile Disco, Armand Van Helden, Hercules and Love Affair, Duck Sauce.

British dance-duo Basement Jaxx’s new album, “Junto” is their first full album in five years and it has been worth the wait. In that time, dance music was hijacked by the likes of the ambiguous EDM: over-commercialized “progressive”-Big Room House (think Swedish House Mafia), Skrillex inspired-brostep, and the current over-the-hill trap music (aka hip-hop/rap EDM-ized). Now we have come full circle back to club-friendly straight-forward house music. Basement Jaxx’s sound has its history steeped in early Chicago house of the 80s and disco music of the 70s. In their video for their first single “Never Say Never”, Jaxx Industries take their spin at the more recent fads in dance music with their creation of the “TW3RK-BOT 1.0: Bringing Dance Back To Mankind”.

for more tracks: http://bit.ly/lechugamix

for lechuga mix 2016/08: http://bit.ly/lechugamix201608

[wecastmusic]

Never Say Never (feat. ETML)

Basement Jaxx

Junto

(2014)