Henry has a great many talents; he’s not the sort of person to downplay his skills. Gift wrapping, however, is certainly not one of them. If it’s in a box he’s usually fine, or at least not actively making a mess of anything, but anything more complicated than that tends to turn into a disaster at his hands no matter how many TikTok tutorials he watches on the subject. And as the sign above the station proclaims, the proceeds all go to charity—so really, isn’t Henry doing a public service by having someone with big brown eyes and criminally long eyelashes wrap his gifts on his behalf? It’s a selfless act in the grand scheme of things, surely.
Or, pre-Christmas shopping is hell, but some retail workers make it more than bearable.
the best most hilarious jokes and absolutely irresistible banter! ♡
evie!!! you kill me 😭 have some eurotrip banter - alex is in a bad mood because henry won't have sex with him in a six bed dorm.
“No,” Alex mumbles. “But maybe you could agree to a blowjob in a confessional or something.”
“We are not having sex in a cathedral,” Henry replies, biting his lip in an increased effort to keep the laughter in. “That is a touch too sacrilegious for me.”
“Fine,” Alex replies, his expression softening as he runs his tongue over his bottom lip. Bloody hypocrite, Henry thinks. “A castle. A non-religious monument. A museum!”
“Most of those places have tight security,” Henry points out. “I’d rather take my chances at the hostel.”
“Not with Prudence around,” Alex points out darkly. “She’s everywhere.”
“She’s probably here right now,” Henry teases.
Alex pretends to look under the table, then ducks his head back into view. “Either that or she’s been kidnapped.”
“Alex, you can’t say that—”
“I can and I will,” Alex sighs. “But it doesn’t change that we have two more nights of forced celibacy before I can do some very bad things to you.”
HELLO!!! ♡ For your ficlet fest: 06:22, Kensington Palace, David. 👀
HI EVIE! I saw your prompt and immediately started writing :D Hope you love it!
Want your own ficlet? Rules here!
❤️🤍💙
kensington palace, 6:22am
David wakes up suddenly to a strange sound. It was a weird sort of wind sound, but he was curled up on his inside bed – there isn’t any wind inside. He closes his eyes again and settles down to sleep some more. Then the noise comes again, and this time David thinks it sounds wetter somehow. He raises his neck up to look around in confusion – there definitely isn’t any rain inside. The third time the noise happens, David realizes it's coming from the big bed that he isn’t allowed on. It’s such a tall bed that David can’t actually see what’s causing the noise. He gets up and shakes the sleep off his limbs, and then jumps from the floor to the super uncomfy padded bench at the foot of the bed and peeks his head over the edge of the mattress. The sight that greets him makes his ears droop and a whine builds in his throat.
His Henry is awake before his alarm. That isn’t so unusual, even in the few weeks since he met His Henry, he’s had terrible sleep patterns. Not like David. David plays hard all day, sniffing and running and following His Henry around the hallways and grassy mazes until he’s eventually so tired he just sort of collapses wherever he is and sleeps until the big noise that means it's time to get up blares through the room. But His Henry doesn’t sleep that much. David sometimes wakes up to His Henry sitting on the floor and petting him, long before the sky gets light.
But today, His Henry is still in his bed, and he’s curled up, sort of like David does when he sleeps. But His Henry isn’t relaxed – he’s clutching at the blankets and his whole body is shaking and there’s wetness on his face and oh— His Henry is crying. David doesn’t think before springing onto the mattress and padding over to His Henry’s pillows. His Henry’s eyes are screwed shut – he doesn’t seem to notice that David is here at all, actually. So David climbs over His Henry’s arm and curls up in the small space between his chest and his chin, pressing his body as much as possible against His Henry’s cooled skin, willing some of his body heat to help.
His Henry keeps crying a little longer but then shudders hard and abruptly freezes at the feeling of David against his chest.
“D-david? What – hic – you’re not supposed to—”
David cuts off any more words of protest by licking up His Henry’s chin and cheeks. His Henry should relax about the ‘rules’ and pet him. It’ll make him feel better.
“Blegh. I suppose you think that was a – hic – gift of some sort.” David does. His Henry is still sniffling a bit, but there’s a smile trying to break through the grim set of his mouth. His Henry shoves himself to a sitting position against the pile of pillows, and David takes the opportunity to jump fully into his lap, tail wagging like crazy.
“Oof! You watch those paws mister,” His Henry says, trying to be stern, but his hands come up and scritch behind David’s ears and stroke his back. David wags his tail even harder and pushes his head into the feeling.
“You’re a good boy, yes you are. Coming up here all on your own to pull me out of my dream. Good boy.”
David’s tail wags even harder in triumph. His Henry isn’t crying anymore! And David helped! David should get pets for a while and then they should go outside so David can find all the new smells that happened since yesterday. David has the best ideas, His Henry should listen to him more often.
“Alright, stop barking, you’ll wake the whole wing,” His Henry chuckles, still petting him. “How’s this for a plan, hm? I’ll keep petting you until my alarm goes off in eight minutes, and then we’ll go outside for a long walk around the grounds. Sound good?”
David woofs quietly and lets himself sag all over His Henry’s lap. Helping His Henry, pets, and a long walk: it’s a good morning.
every time Dex tells a lie, his ears grow. the team, understandably preoccupied with actual haus ghosts, somewhat clairvoyant goalies and pies appearing out of thin air, never quite notice.
Dex can't repair a thing to save his life, but he's extremely skilled in building huge, intricate projects in the sims. the Haus dryer has remained broken for several semesters.
au in which dex is suddenly way more relatable (I have worn the same clothes for like three days in real life but I look AWESOME in Animal Crossing)
Bitty is Gordon Ramsay. Jack, who lives under a rock, does not realize this. Jack's friends realize this halfway through cooking dinner that first night Jack and his mystery boyfriend are coming over. Chaos ensues.
Happy Nice Ask Day to all who celebrate! ♡ I wanna know, where do you find inspiration for your creative projects?
Thanks Evie!
Sort of all over the place- my favorite books/movies, song lyrics, other fics, florida man headlines, wish fulfillment, spite…
Sometimes I’ll see a tumblr post or a prompt in fest and just get seized by the urge to put those little guys (gender inclusive) into a Situation.
One time I just want to write a series of the sappiest, fluffiest, most cozy little slice of life things and I hit 100 followers around the same time so I took the opportunity and made the first ficlet fest happen. 😂
