(un)exploded lion primary + burnt snake secondary
Hi! Wisteria. I just discovered sorting hat chats a not long ago. The test put me as Lion primary but none of the secondary seems fit. Could you, by any chance, help me? I would love to confirm if I'm a lion primary or not and my secondary if able.
I'm currently 23 if that helps. Been out and about in the real world not too long.
My understanding of the primary is motivations and drive. I'm driven by vision of what I want in life. There is something I want to see no matter what. Before, I used to be very enthusiastic about it and hopeful it'll come to pass. As I'm working in real world however I was hit very hard with the reality and my limitations. I still want to see my vision a reality. But I'm no longer confident I can make it happen.
Well, I'm definitely seeing that Lion primary. And it looks like we've got us a Burned secondary.
Before, I'm very judgmental, confident and dynamic. I moved with total confidence in myself and where I'm going. I was very confident in my own conscience and was willing to risk my hide for it. I fought with people on daily basis on political, societal and moral issues. I was so assertive, in fact, that I unintentionally suffocated my friends. I pushed them and molded them to be what I deemed appropriate. I tone-policed them. I brought them along in some humanitarian projects I founded believing their abilities better spent bettering people's lives.
For a time, they went along with me. Until it all came apart... They resented me all along. And they hate me even now.
Oooh. Looks like we've got an Exploded Lion primary in the process of healing. Because yeah. Check for seeing/treating people as tools, check for 'the ends always justify the means,' we've even got words like "judgmental" "molded" "deemed appropriate," that speak to the Exploded Lion "enemy or ally" world view. I'm sorry it all fell apart as dramatically as it did. But you're only 23. You've got plenty of time to rebuild stronger.
I never regretted what I have done. The only regret I have is that I didn't communicate and ask them. I shouldn't have pushed and manipulated them. But did I regret the things I accomplished with them? No. Everything, I did, every impact I left behind was a product of my beliefs (human rights, that every ethnic group should be equals, how we can coexist with nature and how we can progress without abandoning the ways of life but improve it).
Hmm. Casual dropping of the word "manipulate" is making me think maaaaybe Snake secondary. Although Snakes almost never actually use the word "manipulating" when describing themselves. Although sometimes when they're burnt they do...
Here's the thing. We need firebrands like you. But what I don't want is for you to burn yourself out and/or burn every bridge you've got. You're not going to get much done that way.
I believe it is my duty, as someone who can do it, to speak for people and things that cannot speak for themselves. Even though it's not my job and won’t affect me in anyway.
Take a second, now. You've just told me that you tried to speak for your friends, and they resented you for it and that made everything fall apart. Take your own advice and ask. Setting yourself up to be the sole, lone savior is just setting yourself up for a fall.
I want to make sure that we can coexist with nature in harmony. As much as a lone human can do anyway. Even if I have to be alone or be remembered as a monster in doing so. It might not be correct in universal sense, but I will not budge on it. I felt hurt that my judgment so wrongfully made my friends miserable and traumatized. But I’ll keep going no matter what I have to sacrifice. I’m willing to devote my entire life to make sure people and nature can coexist in this transitional era. We are in the transitional era. We are about to move toward a new age.
... a brighter age. A BETTER age. An AGE... OF MUTANTS!!!
I'm sorry, I'm sorry. I only mean to tease a little. Only I read this entire paragraph in the voice of Ian McKellen's Magneto.
(to the degree that I'm considering Double Lion for you. It is the Revolutionary sorting, after all.)
The thing is, I now see the limitations of myself. I was too impulsive. I managed to maneuver myself into a dead-end. Well, not a dead end per se. I can still claw my way out and get back on track. But it will take 10 if not 100 times of efforts.
This is all very brute-force Lion secondary language.
I don’t have a good degree. No work experience. No connections. And definitely no money to my name. I have nothing. I am on the verge of giving up entirely.
... you know, objectively? Almost no one has those things when they are 23. You're not even old enough to rent a car yet (in the US, where I am.) You're going to be okay.
I know that my dream is meant to be, but I’m not sure I will ever be good enough to hold it in my hands in my lifetime. I question everything my dream stands for.
Accomplishing this dream is not up to you, personally. And just because it's not something that you personally accomplish in your lifetime does not mean your effort was wasted. I'm not much of a "Great Man Theory" person. The way I see it, change is made by groups of people. (It's the Badger secondary.)
I don’t dare to judge anyone anymore. I’m just a failure, someone who got kicked out of the job. I’m not good enough.
In terms of the system, all this is burnt secondary talk. 'My primary thinks that xyz is correct, but my secondary cannot accomplish it.' Your primary recently took a pretty massive hit, and it does take a second for Lion primaries to change directions.
I was too vindictive and deliberately sabotaged my job to get back at my team. But I also knew that I was not smart and practical. I’m too slow and dumb. I lost all my shine and confidence in myself.
Okay, well. You did a dumb thing because you were angry, and have since regretted it. But the rest.... just sounds like you're in the Dunning-Kruger trough. You thought you were hot shit, because you didn't have the experience to know better. You've since leaned it's more complicated than you thought, and are in the process of taking steps to do what you do better.
I want to be less ruthless and kinder. Thing is, I never manage to.
As far as I'm concerned, wanting to be less ruthless and kinder is half the battle. Especially since you've been pretty self-aware when it comes to pointing out those tendencies so far, and pretty realistic about the ways they sabotage you.
Compare to my friends or family, I am a lot more ruthless, vengeful and sadistic even.
It's a Lion primary thing to think that how you feel now is you, is identity, and will always be you. But Lions who want to change can change the same as anyone else, even if it sometimes takes them longer to do it.
I can tolerate abuse for a very long time
... why?
but if I have even a smallest chance. I’ll make sure they’ll regret even living. I talked jokingly with my sister, if I hate someone. I won’t kill them. Say, if they have an accident. I will make sure they survive but I’ll make them live in as much pain as possible. I will rip them of their future and hope. If they want to build their own business, I will make sure they can’t even dream of it.
... okay, right. You know, I have seen these... fun vengeance fantasies with other Exploded primaries. I think it's a pattern. Although, to be fair, I don't get that many Exploded primaries writing into me. If you're writing in, it's because you've got some degree of self-reflection and doubt, which you probably don't have much of if you're Exploded.
Same goes for people who stand in my way. If you are willing, I’m open for a negotiation. But if you get in my way, I will make sure to cripple them to the point they can’t stand anymore. I will destroy their hope, dreams, friendship, network. I won’t crush their business but their souls. I’ll make sure they are nothing but a soulless husk that can’t ever stand in my way, or my people’s ways.
.... and the Brotherhood of Evil Mutants will rise stronger than ever before, etc etc. Don't worry Magneto, I've got that part. :)
I believe I understand now why my family and friends call me a monster. I’m trying to use it for good though. Although I still have a very long and arduous way to go before I can make something worthwhile for everyone. I do want love and acceptance, but maybe that’s beyond me.
I really don't think you're a monster. I think you're young, I think you're passionate, I think you've got a simplistic worldview (that you're working on) and that you've got some power fantasies you like to turn over in your mind at a point in your life where you feel very powerless.
Potential theory though. You do use dehumanizing language like "monster" for yourself, and the other vengeance-fantasy asks came from Exploded Badgers. And you DO talk a lot about your community, and things like tone-policing definitely are a kind of etiquette. It's possible that you're an Exploded Authoritarian Badger who lost their community, and coped by 1) kicking themselves out of their definition of "person" 2) clinging really hard to a Lion worldview. That is totally possible.
(But 'partially exploded Lion' is also still possible, and simpler, and I always go for the simplest possible explanation with these things.)
I don’t know what my secondary is. I don’t like surprises. I hate sudden change in plans. One thing I know though, I love learning new knowledge but only on what I am interested in. I do not feel like I’m attached to knowledge or resources. After all, everything is fleeting. I operate best when I’m left to my own device with clear objectives though.
Hmm. Maybe a little prep-work secondary flavored, but this is just people stuff. Even the most fluid Snake secondary doesn't like it when there's a last minute change in plans, or a really unclear objective.
I will find a way to get it done on my own, using what I have at hands. Lying is like a second nature to me though. I know when to lie to get what I want. I lie all the time, but to me, it’s just ‘coloring the story’. I don’t feel the need to stay true to myself all the time. I adapt to people easily and take on their language and mannerism fast. If anything, sticking to the truth about myself and how I feel takes conscious efforts.
And you didn't connect with the description of Snake? Because this is a description of Snake.
I’m not a very fast learner. But I can ‘appear’ as competent and knowledgeable very easily. In work environment, for example, I adopt the language, mannerism and jargons of more knowledgeable seniors. I manage to charm many clients this way. I don’t know that well what I’m doing, but enough to convince people and build up their confidence. I know it in my gut I’m still not good enough or competent enough. Way worse than my colleagues. Yet I manage to convince all the higher-ups that I’m the front runner among all new recruits. I’m still naïve, unorganized and not knowledgeable enough. But somehow I hid all those things and appeared to have ‘potentials’. So much so the head of my department picked me as his personal assistant to personally train me (a very good prospect of advancement). Until it all unraveled.
Yeah, you're a Snake. (With a little bit of imposter syndrome, which is Really Normal when you've started at a new job.)
When I have to talk with people, in interviews or meetings. I will not try to appear all shiny and glamorous. People usually expect that because it's natural for us to put best foot forward. I'll double down on it and bare myself open (to garner sense of accessibility, lower their guard and hold their attention). For example, I will not glorify my accomplishments but I'll list out my failures. Then I'll top it with 'but I believe that is my strength. I know what it's like to fail. I might not be the best or have the most glamorous resume but what I have is determination and will to succeed. I would really love it, if I could grow and be of use to you and your company' Or something along that line. But that depends on people and situations. I'd say, I just respond to what people expect and try to appeal to them in a way they appreciate.
^ Snake. And that's a pretty good speech. I think that would probably work on me. I know that personally I can be a little suspicious of people who are too shiny, and too charming. :D
How I did it is a mystery to me though. I have absolutely no idea what I have done to appear that way. Or what I did to convince them of that perception.
I mean, you just laid out your strategy. You adopt the language of the person you're talking to, while also stressing your passion for the job, and your own shortcomings - using that both as a way to make yourself seem more trustworthy, and a tactic so they can't use that info against you. A very cohesive, laid-out strategy. Snake.
(Same goes for my old friends, I didn’t know what I did it keep them on the leash but I did it). But I don't relate to Snake sec because I'm not that slick or playful. If anything, I'm intense and blunt.
Yeah, because you've got an intense and blunt primary that you live in kind of a lot. I don't think it would be at all a bad thing for you to live in your Snake secondary a little more, for a change.
I really apologize if this is too long, or if you feel sickened or repulsive. I figure I need to layout myself without coloring it. If you could help me figure it out, that would be great!
Don't worry about me. I'm good. And I really do appreciate the self-knowledge, and the honesty, and the vulnerability. (Just no coming at me with random hate mail, okay. So far, Exploded Lions have been the only ones to do that.) You're on the right track. Just keep moving forward.
Thank you in advance and hope you have a good week ahead!
:)













