#fall down dead

[soosmain]

Relfection

[burningdreambanana]

I watched Mehmet Günsür's 0% rated slasher

You know it's bad when a bartender is a better cop than you are

I guess as someone who genuinely believes that the Omen II is a masterpiece and that Urban Legends was a great movie, I was hoping for a pleasant surprise. Unfortunately, this was pretty bad.

Actually, this movie is in a strange place where it doesn't quite enter so bad it's good territory, but it does feel at times like it's on a journey to get there.

Does it deserve the 0%? Not sure. The story is very cliché and uninspired, the dialogue is laughingly bad, stilted and unnatural, and it has many questionable acting moments. On the bright side, the Picasso killer (real ones will recognize the psychiatrist from Argento's Suspiria) is properly creepy, the deaths properly gruesome if you like that sort of things (though we mostly see the results and not the act itself), our final girl Christie is likeable enough, and David Carradine's character is pretty hilarious (though I'm not quite sure if it was all intentional).

The Picasso killer was most likely inspired by House of Wax and Silence of the Lambs, which isn't a bad thing per se but the movie never does anything interesting with it and it adds to the movie's lack of orginality.

Mehmet plays an Italian-born cop, Stefan, who is hilariously bad at his job, something he shares with his partner. Recently divorced, addicted to pills, stubborn, abrasive and kind of just an asshole to people he is to protect (which he repeatedly fails to do), and who shows up to work like this

I may not know all that much about it, but I refuse to believe this is acceptable working clothes for a policeman.

He serves as the love interest to Christie and the movie keeps trying to force these "intimate" moments between them but it always feels awkward. Also other than Stefan being hot, I just can't find any reason for Christie to have fallen for that guy.

The movie ends with a rather expected "twist." I wonder if they thought they were going to have a sequel or just did it because they felt they had to.

Anyway, it wasn't as bad as it could have been, the movie is "only" 90 minutes (less than a MC episode!) and I'm always down for some 2000s Mehmet so I don't particularly regret watching it. I will continue to go down the list of his filmography hoping for something better

[betch-tetz]

Dirty mind,

Dirty mouth,

Pretty little head.

[horror-hotties]

Dominique Swain

Horror Cred: Devour, Dead Mary, Fall Down Dead, Sharkansas Women’s Prison Massacre

[horror-hotties]

Dominique Swain

Horror Cred:  Devour, Dead Mary, Fall Down Dead, Sharkansas Women's Prison Massacre

[kierroyal]

[pnk-apricorn-blog]

...

[horrorly-worrorly]

Film Review: Fall Down Dead

Fall Down Dead is a 2007 horror/thriller movie.

Notable stars include Dominique Swain (best known as the title character of 1997's Lolita; she's practically got a cult on here), Udo Kier (who has been in everything from Suspiria to the Halloween remake to Madonna's Sex book), and the late David Carradine.

This review contains spoilers.

Awkward detective, awkward love interest, awkward group.

My Thoughts: If you remember what I said in my Shiver review (something I also mentioned in my last review), you know that I love movies with plots like this. Unfortunately, this is one of those movies where the concept is great, but is executed horribly. The writing is not good, and this is how: The characters. Are literally. THE worst survival group I have ever seen, especially the detectives (how'd they even get on the force?). Virtually none of them are likable (except perhaps Christie and the maid), and most of the movie is just arguing and incredibly dumb decisions. And the filler scenes. THE FILLER SCENES! One "suspense" sequence goes on for minutes, only to climax with...a mouse (if I recall correctly; it's been a few weeks since I watched the movie). Why not have more interactions with the actual killer, since the movie is largely about him?

It's a bad idea to lock a woman into a room for her safety when there's a serial killer in the building. It's even worse when said serial killer STILL MANAGES TO GET INSIDE THE ROOM!

The Picasso Killer (played by the aforementioned horror icon, Udo Kier) is really the only high point of the movie. He turns his victims into "works of art" (like some Hannibal-level thing), and the reason he's so bent on getting to Christie is, not only has she seen his face and lived, but she looks exactly like the woman in a sketch he drew, apparently (I've read that the human brain cannot create a face. Suspension of disbelief, here). But you never really find out too much about him from what I've already mentioned.

Just your average one-person chess game nbd

Now I'm just going to mention a few more things about Udo Kier: He was the star of a lot of controversial '70s films, most of which fall into the horror genre somewhere (I actually plan on watching some of them this summer; I think they look neat). He's played Dr. (Baron, rather) Frankenstein, Count Dracula, AND Dr. Jekyll/Mr. Hyde - all within the span of a few years. Not only that, but in one of his upcoming films he plays Bela Lugosi (the movie in question is sort of about Ed Wood). He's also starring in not one, but TWO movies with The Human Centipede II star Laurence R. Harvey:  the extreme horror anthology The Profane Exhibit and the giallo throwback horror comedy The Editor (I only know Udo Kier is in The Profane Exhibit from this obviously-very-NSFW trailer here, and I only know Laurence R. Harvey is in The Editor from things Mr. Harvey has tweeted), with the latter film also starring Mr. Harvey's Call Girl co-star, Tristan Risk.

But this movie, Fall Down Dead, was NOT a good introduction to Mr. Kier, regardless of how cool his character was.

Would I Recommend This Movie?: No. Part of me wishes I could, but I can't.