Fem!Beyond headcanons~
• If maleB was bad femB would be 10x worse. She’d be all nice and cute to your face and fuck you up so bad when your back was turned.
• She headlines a screamo all-girl band and tags at night with L’s logo except it’s dicks. All her lyrics are about kicking the shit out of L or making L look like a fool
• She makes up elaborate stories on social media about how she banged L and his peepee is really small and how he tried to get her involved in candle pyramid schemes
FemB: L totally believes natural oils can cure cancer
FemB: don’t buy his homeopathic water ok
FemB: L vapes but it’s like the shitty drugstore juice
FemB: he drinks bongwater
FemB: I once saw him pull an old skittle out of his belly button and eat it (actually true)
• She dressed up as Watari and flashed INTERPOL then ran off, and Watari had to explain later that wasn’t really him.
• Skilled with shuriken but just as likely to drop it on her foot. Wears steel-toed boots as a result and is missing one (1) toe
• Super kawaii handwriting clashes with the foul content of most of her writing
• She legit steals his helicopter off the HQ roof after scaling the building with those suction cups and lands it at Disney Tokyo covered in graffiti
• Dedicated cosplayer and can become nearly any character with clever makeup and outfits she makes herself. Still loves magical girl manga but makes everybody a goth magical girl in her cosplay
• Tries unsuccessfully to get a job with L, wearing different disguises
FemB: *rings doorbell of his HQ* hi I’m your new gardener
She’s dressed as Edward Scissorhands and proceeds to butcher all the plants outside when they won’t let her in
• Makes YouTube rants about canceling L
FemB: L is very problematic and only hires ONE woman out of a huge team of men. I tried to get a job but he refused 😪
• All this really starts impacting L’s reputation since she’s a popular makeup Youtuber with a huge following
• no fake case for her, she’s just going to be a god tier troll until L had no choice but to pay attention