Shoot For The Stars Chapter 2:Rejected Feelings
When morning came I just laid there staring at my ceiling as I thought about the prom that's coming up soon, now I'm not the type of girl that liked prom at all but, there are times I can't help but think about perhaps dancing with Hope and those cheesy cliche high school prom shit happens, and we end up.
I know I should think about it but it's like no matter what I do it slips its way in any way. “Are you going to skip today?” My roommate asked as I glanced at the dark-haired girl. Her name was Xion, she was a nice and mostly quiet girl. And from what I can tell she seems like a nice girl though, I don't ever recall her getting into trouble except when with Axel but that's mostly Axel's doing she just seems to get caught up in it. That's just from I've observed over the years I don't really spend any time with her, we're strictly roommates our relations to each other doesn't go any further than that.
I shook my head in reply. “No, I'm not, I just need a few secs before I get up” She nodded before grabbing her bag. “Okay, see you” She left while I remained in my spot thinking about how pathetic I was being over this. I released a frustrated sigh as I got out of bed to do my usual morning routines before going to my classes. I had to rush just, so I wouldn't show up too late. I arrived about a minute or two late no big deal and thankfully it was with my calmer teacher who doesn't make too much of a deal out of things.
"Cutting it a little close?" I didn't have to turn to know who it was, Prompto was another classmate of mine, and we have had friendly talks here and there mostly about photography since that was an interest we shared though he clearly loves it more than I. “Yup but you know how it is with traffic these days” I quietly replied with my lips slowly breaking into a smile as the same with him before we went back to 'Studying'.
I took 'notes' here and there before the bell rings its divine tones letting us know that it was time to go, I picked up my stuff and walking to my next class while trying not look bothered or anything. I was almost to my class when the boy from when I spotted the dirty blond boy from before only this type he was wearing a red....cape that means that he's part of the student council, and he just let me sneak out last night? Oh god, I hope he doesn't use that for blackmail. We walked pass one another with no acknowledgment from him so, I assume he didn't notice me as I head to my class. Again I took a seat and barely paid attention to the lesson but only just enough to where I took a few notes. I was feeling a little too down to give any more effort than that but it's not like it mattered graduation really wasn't far off soon I'll be able to live my dream.
It's all I really wanted honestly and nothing so far has made the desire for it fade, my dad sure did try though so much to the point where he can barely look at me saying that I was throwing my life away, and he wanted no part in it so, I had to turn to my mother the only one willing to actually support it which is a shame because up until that point in my life my dad and I were close. As thick as thieves, but he found space travel too dangerous and too big a risk for me to do.
He wanted me to lead a safer life with a much less life threating job, something like a doctor or a lawyer both fine jobs in their own way but I didn't want that. Not in the slightest, I wanted to travel & explore. Discover new things and worlds like on star trek, I want to see if there's really other life out there like ours and if so I want to communicate with them. To learn from them, see what they know and if we can use it to further earth's progress.
It's the kind of stuff that could really help us as a species and I want to be part of it. I just hope that nothing like aliens happens.
Soon class had ended and it was another rinse and repeat the only thing that was worth noting was lunch when there was a change in the menu.
I sat with my friends munching on my food while listening to them converse.
"So has anyone asked anyone to prom?" Serah asked, Noel much like the rest of us responded with a no.
It made me happy that Hope didn't have a date, given me a slight chance to offer myself as one which would probably just be seen as a friend thing but that didn't matter much as long as I was the one going with him.
"Same here," Serah said which left me to question if no one asked her to prom? "
I was asked but I just didn't want to go with any of them" She replied. "So I was wondering if maybe we could go as a group?" She suggested looking between us for any opinions on it.
"I don't see why not" Noel shrugged. "It's better than going solo" I guess that's true, it's better than what I was planning on doing since I knew that I was never going to get the courage to ask Hope out a second time even if this time it would have been as friends.
I thought as my mind flashed back to when I first confessed my feelings to the Sliver haired boy.
I sat in my dorm mentality freaking out at myself for what I was going to do later on today. You see my friends and I requested a pass so that we can go to the fair and that's where I was going to confess.
The only problem is I was having a total mental breakdown and I don't think that I could actually do it. I've never really confessed to anyone before nor have I ever felt this strongly toward someone so the thought of confessing and the possible reject weighted heavy on me.
What if he says no? What if he doesn't want to be friends with me anymore because by confessing I made him uncomfortable? So many scenarios played over in my head. Each one worse-er than the previous one.
Before I could break down any further I felt a hand on my shoulder, soothing me as I took a relaxing breath.
"Calm down I'm sure it's going to be fine so whatever is going on in there" Serah placed a finger on my head as she said 'there'. "Isn't going to happen okay?"
"But-" Serah placed her finger to my lips now shushing me as she waved the other back and forth, shaking her head.
"No buts I've seen the way Hope has looked at you and I know that the boy likes you back now go out there and assure him that the feeling is mutual it's about time the two of you got together anyway" I questioned if what Serah said was true in my mind.
Did Hope really like me back? Were my feelings really returned by him and I just haven't noticed it? I guess they might, I trust Serah enough to know that she wouldn't lie about something like this so hearing her confirm this eased my mind.
I nodded to myself before standing up and turning towards Serah. "Alright let's go" The two of us shared a smile before stepping out and heading to the gate where the two boys stood.
Noel smirked playfully. "It's about time you two showed up, Hope and I were just about to leave you behind" Noel joked as Serah stepped forth.
"Really you two would leave us behind to fend for ourselves?" She placed her hands on her hips, looking Noel dead in the eyes.
"I've seen you two in combat training, you would be fine" Serah smiled removing her hands from her hips.
"That's true but I think going to the fair is going to be much more fun together," She said walking forward. The ride there was nice the four of us chatted away about what ride should we go on first and snacks we're getting.
Every now and then I would sneak glances at Hope, he was sitting right next to me on the bus and it made my heart flutter uncontrollably.
When we arrived at the fair I was almost too afraid to actually do it but the more rides we went on and the more fun we were having made me feel brave. So I gave Serah the signal and she had Noel go help her with something while I put my plan into motion.
"Hey want to go on that?" I pointed to the Ferris wheel drawing Hope's attention to it.
"Sure" He gave me his hand, the two of us got on and sat down. "Their starting to turn the lights on" I looked out and saw that he was right.
It was getting dark enough for them to do that and it made everything look really pretty. "So beautiful," I said in a low voice.
Hope must have heard me as he smiled, nodding his head. "It sure is" He had this look in his eyes that seemed like he was reminiscing about something that I wasn't sure about. I couldn't help but stare at him in silence taking in the way the light shined in his eyes and illuminated his face.
After a few minutes passed and I didn't think I could wait any longer I inhaled which caught his attention as he looked at me with concern.
"Are you okay?" He leaned forward, sitting closer on the edge of his seat. "You've been acting a bit off today" I swallowed my saliva surprised that he noticed but I shouldn't have been since I knew how observant he is.
"I have been wanting to tell you something actually" I couldn't look him in the eyes as I said this.
"I'm-I'm"My heart rate picked as I tried to put together a sentence properly.
"I'm in love with you...." My voice was low but still loud enough for him to hear at least I hope so because he wasn't saying anything, making me more nervous than before.
Since he wasn't saying anything I slowly looked up at him to see that his head was turned off to the side.
"____ I'm sorry but I-" He sighed. "I think we should just stay friends" As soon as those words left his lips it felt like my world had shattered but that's just being overdramatic if I do say so myself.
I quickly pulled myself together as I waved my hand back and forth dismissively. "Yes, right...I figured as much"
I looked out the window avoiding eye contact. "I just thought that I should say something though....to get it off my chest"
"I'm really sor-" He was about to apologize again for the second time but I really didn't want to hear it honestly.
"Seriously it's fine, all I really wanted was to get it off my chest okay?..." He nodded his head not saying anything until we got off but it was directed towards the others.
"I think it's time we head back" I was standing a little ways behind Hope looking off to the side when I felt someone staring. I looked forward and saw that it was Serah, I could tell that she guessed that I was turned down.
"Yeah, we don't want to be out pass curfew" Noel had agreed. We walked back to the bus stop with Serah and I walked behind the two boys.
"I'm sorry ___ I was so-" I shook my head cutting her short.
And that was in our second year here and my feelings for Hope still haven't gone away which I was surprised at myself for. I always told myself that if I ever fell in love with someone who didn't reciprocate my feels then I would move on.
Yet here I am, the boy of my dreams doesn't return my feelings and I'm still a lovestruck puppy for him.
"Alright then it's settled we are going to prom together" Serah smiled brightly before grabbing her tray to throw away the stuff on it before heading to her next class, same as us.
When I got to class I noticed the boy Serah was talking about the other day who failed flight simulation and he looked down in the dumps. Normally I minded my own business but I guess today I was feeling nosy so, I poked his shoulder catching his attention.
He lifted his head up looking slightly annoyed until he spotted me and then immediately smiled in a flirty way. "Yess?"
I was starting to regret messing with him now but stuck with what I was planning on asking him.
"Are you okay? You looked kinda down" He placed his palm on his face leaning a little close.
"Oh don't worry about that, I'm fine" He looked like he just thought of something judging by how he perked up a bit. "Hey, are you going to prom with anyone?"
"Yes with my friends" He nodded replying with an oh.
The teacher soon showed up and got on with the lessons. I couldn't wait to just get back to my dorm so I can rest already cause by the time school was over that's all that was on my mind sleep.
I went to my dorm and straight to my bed, I don't know what made me so tired but I was. Practically fainted the moment my head hit the pillow, falling into slumberland.
I feel like everyone was out of character Lance, Noel, & Hope especially and that's what dissapoints me the most about this chapter.
To clear anything up this only just as Voltron characters in it, voltron itself won't be in here. I don't want to say too much because I don't want to spoil what I'm basing this on but you will find out soon.
