#finnlio

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I am punished by love

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Thank you to @orphanheirs for tagging me a while ago; I finally have something to show! A little bit of context: This is Finn's perspective, early on in the story when his relationship with Celio is still fairly new. Shire is Celio's horse who hates him vehemently (but loves Finn). (And yes, she is a Shire horse because Celio is very uncreative with naming things lol.)

I'll put the tag list at the top: @mapplesand @sidhewrites @spideronthesun !

Wind rustles the willow tree. Light seeps through the curtains, dandelion-colored and timid. Finn and Celio lay together, assigning bird calls to their owners, telling each other of lemon syllabub and shop windows. Moments like this are rare. Spare mornings left untouched by churchgoers or patients. When they do arrive, Finn always finds himself wrapping an arm around Celio's stomach, half-mumbling, half-begging for a peaceful moment together, while Celio insists otherwise. I have to stop by the market, he says. Or it will be exercise, cleaning, letters to respond to, even despite the sun being asleep. "A schedule does our health good." he claimed a moment ago, standing by the bed. "You act as if I subject you to torture…" "You torture me," Finn grumped. He outstretched a hand, lazily failing to catch Celio's shirt. "Men die from broken hearts, you know." "So you will be dead in my bed because I made breakfast," Celio's voice sparkled. "Yes. Tragically." "Then you can help me." Finn made a noise that spoke for itself. Celio sighed. "I'll bring it to you. You'll forgive me." He leaned over the mattress, combed through Finn's disheveled hair and placed a kiss over the mole on his cheek. Finn took the opportunity and snapped his arms around Celio's waist, tumbling him onto the bed, chests pressed together. While Celio tried prying his fingers off to no avail, Finn burrowed his face in his neck. "You were not as asleep as you were acting," Celio said. "You'll forgive me," Finn responded, muffled. Refusing was useless. Finn's head lays on his chest, now, no longer holding him captive. Celio's heart vocalizes under his ear like a lullaby. Men were cold to the touch more often. Bodies mute, dead on their side of the mattress. The closest to adoration Finn experienced was searing tea splashed on his front by a betrayed wife. He never held it over their heads. Being in his company was a sign of the times; he end of careers, families, happiness. It was never as airy as he'd fantasized, but with Celio's fingers traveling over his vertebrae, today, he hopes, near-prays it will be different. He holds his hand, and Celio's pulse misses a beat. At first, Finn thinks he must have imagined it, but it only races further, reminiscent of him forgetting to close the gate behind Shire. Did Celio not want to be touched? Perhaps forcing him to stay had truly upset him?— "I love you," Celio says. Oh. Finn adjusts to look at him. Celio focuses on the ceiling before finally returning the gaze. His eyes are porcelain, loving in the identical, anxious way of a teenaged boy's first kiss. Finn's heart pangs. He always looks at him like he's someone else. He treats Finn as someone who never failed. Who never committed unspeakable acts, who never wept, or panicked, or placed molding bread in front of his parents. He runs him baths, rubs knots out of his neck as if he never spat at him for saving his life—he never deserved that kindness. God, or whatever fickle thing set his future in front of the gallows, knows he didn't. Finn watches men die and has the audacity to be aghast, to need comfort from Celio for the same damn thing every day when he hangs his coat. It is as if Celio is so godly he cannot comprehend his human failure... It is practically manipulation to keep his intrigue alive, your lips pursed on the words: if you were anybody else, you wouldn't like me. Finn opens his mouth, this time, albeit for a moment. "I love you, too," he says. The phrase is too simple. It does not repay the debt he owes. Still, Celio's heartbeat quiets.

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It's awesome when I get to write Celio having a little crush on Finn because omg no way me too. Easiest task of my life.

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Finn, standing up during his court hearing: Yeah I fucked that guy I fucked guys last week I'll start an opium den so I can have men-exclusive orgies there, I don't even need to be possessed to do it, and you know what fuck everybody who doesn't send me to jail and fuck """Father Harcourt""" in particular with that stupid bitchass title and his pretentious bitchass name and his fancy shoes he proudly pays for with orphan corpses. I need him to die in a carriage accident.

Celio:

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Decided I wasn't invested in Finnlio for like a week and was kind of worried about that but the fixation is already crawling back again. Thank you Mitski

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Have you got it in you?

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Always wanna know more about Finn and Celio 😈 but also. Would love to know more about any of the pairings you're most itching to talk about/share something of!

Hiii I'm sorry this has taken so long! I've wanted to answer for Finnlio but have just been stumped on what to say, specifically. I think I'm just going to ramble about their perception of each other since it's been on my mind!

So, I'm a big fan of using the abstract, whether that means dream sequences or something more blurred with reality, and Finn's greenhouse is a good example of that! Basically, when he almost accidentally killed a patient due to having An Episode in the middle of surgery, he created a mental "safe space", the greenhouse, to retreat to when necessary in order to dissociate calm himself. Even though I've been too intimidated to officially write one of them yet, the greenhouse scenes are my favorite... They make for an easy way to glimpse into his psyche and how things change as time goes on.

First, Finn is confused to find Celio to be a part of the greenhouse now (early in the story, pre-relationship). As Finn's "gardening", Celio's giving sage advice, encouragement, etc. Funniest to me is Celio trying to bring one of the pots over but struggling with the weight, and Finn being all like "here let me help you!". Very much a savior fantasy, making Celio into something coy and delicate because he thinks that's attractive 😅. Literally his two purposes of being present there are 1. be supportive to Finn 2. look pretty. As time goes on, though, it does get more realistic and more sinister. Suddenly, the greenhouse has sprung a leak. Then two. It's always raining outside, Finn has started putting buckets down. Finn tells Celio to be careful of the buckets, yet he's kicking them over anyway. His own "safe space" has become a place of anxiety, somewhere where he fears the gun on Celio's hip and argues with him the same as reality. I could say more but I should keep the climactic bits for when I actually write them lol.

Meanwhile, Celio, unfortunately, is more reality-focused so there's less opportunities to use direct symbolism. But I still find a way! The best way to describe how he sees Finn in more abstract scenes is basically the devil on his shoulder. Celio almost fears him, because he's a reminder of all the things he wants but shouldn't have. It's shallow, Finn hardly even has a personality, he's just the personification of The Temptation. As time goes on, Finn does become less of a bogeyman to him though and—actually similar to how Finn views Celio—Celio treats him as a damsel in distress. Whenever Celio has what he wants, he becomes obsessively terrified of losing it, so any dreams he has are basically "Finn's in danger, let me shoot things to save him". No personality from his boyfriend afterward other than "wow, Celio, you're so strong and capable and perfect". I'm sure that doesn't say anything about him as a person...

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I feel like people might see my House MD reblogs on main and then go to my writeblr like "this had to have inspired Prodigal right" but actually, shockingly, I had that whole concept before I knew House MD was Like That. So you can imagine my surprise when I started the show...