Elliot had been so excited to have his sister finally home—and not just briefly home, for a holiday break that was so short it was almost worst than not even happening at all. No, she was home-home, for the next three months anyway, and the next three months were all that mattered because the month after that Elliot would be joining her at Hogwarts and they would not just be together again, but be together at Hogwarts.
He was so excited to see the castle, to be sorted into Slytherin House with Emma, to get his own wand (he had been pestering mum for weeks and she’d promised that they could finally go to Diagon Alley next week and get it, even though she’d originally intended to wait until their letters came with their list of books for their classes), to start learning magic, to start learning all the things Emma had talked about in her letters home.
And he was excited, still. He was. He was just...a little unsure.
Emma seemed so different. And obviously going to Hogwarts, becoming a real wix, was a big deal! He knew it was a big deal. Obviously that was going to make a person different. Obviously. He wasn’t stupid. He just hadn’t realized it would also make them...small. Or maybe it just seemed that way because Emma had learned so much at Hogwarts that now being at home—being with him again—made her feel like everything else was small. Maybe she was just adjusting. Maybe she was just growing up.
Well, Elliot was going to catch-up with her soon. And in the meantime...well, in the meantime, she could at least tell him all about the amazing stuff he was going to see next year. And maybe in the process, she’d remember that even though being at home wasn’t as much fun as being at Hogwarts, he was at home, and they could still have fun together. Right?
“Hey Emma,” Elliot said, a little more uncertainly than he’d meant to. He scuffed a foot on the floor, wondering if she was going to tell him to go find something to entertain himself with the way mum did when she was working on the account books or trying to coax Evelyn to take a nap. “So...do you have underwater windows in your bedroom at school, too? Or, um...or is it just the common room?”
Marlene had quite forgotten what she had come in here for. Some question she needed to ask Severus, surely -- there was no other reason to enter the little room that he’d converted into his potions laboratory. But he had not been in there when she arrived, and Marlene hadn’t felt like chasing him all over the estate when she knew he would surely turn up here sooner or later, so she’d settled down to wait.
And, like any properly curious Ravenclaw, had had little trouble finding entertainment to while away the time while she did. Severus seemed to be quite the reader himself -- and quite the notetaker, too. Marlene hadn’t meant to poke her nose into his private notes; she’d simply picked up the nearest volume, flipped it open, and started reading.
His spidery, cramped little writing was hard to puzzle-out, but no harder than aunt Cullodena’s chicken-scratch; Marlene squinted, leaned closer, and read on. She didn’t understand all of it -- probably not even half of it; she was no potioneering master, had always been too much of a daydreamer to prove adept at a subject that required one to pay close attention and keep careful timing -- but that didn’t mean she wasn’t fascinated by the bits she did understand. She’d passed her Potions O.W.L. with an Acceptable, after all, even if it had been as much luck as anything else that had kept her brew from burning...
She was so engrossed, sitting there in the chair by the window, nose inches from Severus’s book, that she didn’t even hear the door open -- but she heard what followed the opening of the door, all right!
Alice had never been denied books before and so she didn’t know how enraged she should be at these circumstances. Politeness took over her and she delicately repeated,
“But I’m going to be starting here after the Summer, so -,”
“As I’ve already said, it is only available to current students.”
“I can’t get books out from my school now though.” Alice persisted, speaking in an urgent whisper. “Please? I really don’t want to go to the community library.”
The thought of the lack of the books they had there made her shudder. The librarian sighed, turning to another customer, obviously growing bored of Alice. She stared sadly at the three books that sat on the desk – one on paranormal activity, one on planting and The Invisible Man.
“You can take them out on my card.”
Her head flicked in the direction of the voice and saw an older boy not even looking at her properly. She wasn’t used to speaking to older boys apart from Matt and his friends, so she didn’t even know how to take part in the conversation.
“Oh, no, I can’t do that.” She replied with an awkwardly polite laugh and a shake of a hand.
He finally looked at her and Alice was taken aback by the fact that not only was he an older boy, he was beautiful. She never really had an interest in boys before this, but could always appreciate someone’s beauty and he possessed beauty in abundance.
“No, really, it’s fine.”
He spoke in a low voice, but a little louder than Alice’s whisper.
“No, I mean, that would be against the rules.” She said with slightly raised eyebrows, smiling all the same. “But thank you.”
He smirked at her and the librarian turned away from her computer, speaking in an even tighter whisper than before.
“You are 160 days overdue on this book. The charge is £75.”
There was a silence and Alice looked between this boy and the librarian with great bemusement.
“What?” He said with no attempt at speaking in a low voice now. He laughed. “I just found this in my room and thought I was doing a good thing.”
An uncontrollable giggle left Alice. The librarian gave her a stern look causing Alice to try and get a handle on her laughing, but all she really noted was that the boy was looking at her with equal levels of bemusement. Now she was left with an uncontrollable blush.
Embarrassed at the colour, she pointed at the books, picking them up to return them to their correct places.
As she was placing the last of the books, The Invisible Man, back, she jumped at a face appearing behind the shelf.
“Sorry, sorry, I just wanted to let you know I’ve paid my debt to the library.” Alice smiled, turning her face down and away from him.
“Quite a high price tag for a book. I hope it was worth it.” He let out a small laugh.
“Can I speak to you without the shelf between us?”
They now had less space and shelves between them as Alice walked out the library, not wanting to break any more rules in her little place of worship.
“I’m Jay, by the way. Or JJ, lots of people call me that.” Jay announced when they were outside the library with the sun hitting his face and making it comparable to a statue in an art gallery glistening in the light. She took a breath.
Despite them living in a tiny village, she wasn’t familiar with this older, mysterious boy.
“I’m Alice. You can call me Al, but not many people do.” He laughed at her poor joke and it made her heart beat wildly.
“Like the song?”
Laughter sang between them and she nodded wildly.
“Just like the song.”
let’s hear it for the boy – july 29th
“A boy? A boy!”
All that George received for that was exasperation from Alice.
“Yes, a -,”
“Oh, shut up, George,” Millie hit his arm and turned back to Alice. “Tell us EVERYTHING!”
Normally it was Millie telling them everything about a boy she had met at a party or George privately telling her about his undying love for Millie. There was never anything Alice had to say about other people, it was always about her books or subjects or tea or music. This was so very different and she didn’t even know where to begin.
“Yeah, start with what boy it is.” George continued, rubbing at the spot where Millie had hit him.
“Well, his name is JJ and -,”
“JJ? As in Jay Jhaveri?” George asked, looking more alert.
“You know him?”
“Know him? He is dreamy and so much older than us – Ally, you like an older boy? Where would you have met him? At a party? If you’ve gone to your first ever party without me then I will SCREAM -,”
“Mills -,”
“We met at the library.”
“That day you were supposed to meet us at the library?”
Alice provided George with a sheepish smile, them both knowing now that she had ditched their planned true crime documentary marathon, so she could spend the day with JJ.
“So it’s been two weeks?”
“One week and three days?” Alice responded, carefully trying to sound like she hadn’t keeping track.
“What have you guys done? Are you still a virgin?”
“Millie, heck, of course I am!”
Millie shrugged.
“Being older he’ll want sex sooner than guys our age.” She said matter-of-factly. She turned to George, “How long would you wait?”
“I’ve been waiting 16 years. I’m good at waiting.”
Millie raised her hand as if he had proven her point.
She wondered if Millie was right. ‘Boys’ was not something Alice had any knowledge on. Maybe she should find a book on them.
“Anyway,” She changed the subject, suppressing her fear on how these things worked. “You both know of him? What do you think?”
George filled his air up with cheeks and puffed them out slowly.
“I think this is so cute! You seem like an unlikely couple, but if you like him – we need more details! Spill, spill, spill.” Millie squealed, but Alice kept her eyes focused on George causing Millie to turn and stare at him too. He felt both sets of eyes on him and waved his hands wildly.
“Yeah, well, he is cool, I guess… but he is much older than us? What, like eighteen?”
“Nineteen…” Alice said in a small voice. “Nobody else knows about us right now and I’m only telling you two, because we know about the age gap. When I turn seventeen, which is very soon, then we won’t hide it. He’s just… lovely.”
George eventually nodded.
“Well, if you’re happy.”
i think we’re alone now – august 3rd
They skipped the song by Joy Division and it went to Africa by Toto. They only listened to the happy and silly songs together.
One earphone each.
Her head was resting on his shoulder with his arm wrapped tightly around her. The sun was beating down on them. This was how summer slipped away – in the space between his arm and torso.
“Can I ask you something?” She softly edged her head up so he knew she was listening. “If the rules were different with the library, would I have even stood a chance with you?”
She laughed so much that she shook his chest and then his laughter shook her. That was how they moved, one after the other.
“Maybe in a parallel universe I did get those books and we never even spoke.” She mused softly and he let out a long sigh.
“Oh, I’m glad I live in this universe then.” He shifted slightly, moving to his bag. “I did note though that one of the books was this? Hopefully it was this anyway.”
She pushed herself up to be leaning on her elbow and took The Invisible Man out of his hands.
“I didn’t realise you were paying such close attention…” She stared at the book in amazement.
“Yeah, yeah, you’d think I just wouldn’t remember anything about the day I met you.” She laughed again, feeling suddenly shy and embarrassed.
“I think even in the parallel universe where I get those books, you would still have an overdue book and I would still laugh at you…”
“So I wouldn’t be replaced with a library?”
“Wait, no, nobody replaces a library for me. Libraries are my holy ground, my church, my safe place. All people are second place.” She laughed lightly, leaning back into his chest, feeling something tighten in his body ever so slightly.
“I don’t really have a safe place like that. I guess my flat is now, but it’s not really a home.”
It made Alice feel sad. Very, very sad.
He just wanted a home.
She understood that JJ had a hard life and it was one she would never be able to relate to. She also knew there were rumours about the life he had been leading and company he was keeping, but again she couldn’t relate to that. She did know that the person he was with her was who he was or wanted to be and sometimes people were put in hard positions in life.
She put her hand on his chest and circled the general area of his heart.
“This can always be your safe place. Right in the middle of a field, listening to music and, if you like, being with me.” She looked up at him and watched as his eyes moved to focus on hers. Something told her that the answer touched him.
She could never understand a life as difficult as his, but she wanted him to know an easier life even if it was just when they were together.
drive – august 16th
She had never even touched herself before and now his hand was on her. It felt like pure ecstasy and she didn’t want the feeling to ever end. Eventually her hand was gripping at his shirt and her eyes were closing, the last image of his lovely face in her head, as she moaned out, shaking out the feeling of the joy. Her eyes opened again and she was gasping again.
“What the heck?” She asked all breathy and bewildered. He searched her face, his smile reaching his eyes as he kissed her softly.
“You uh… liked it then?”
She shook her head, still unable to get over the shaking in her toes.
“I… have no words.”
He removed his hand from underneath her summer dress and touched her tingling skin.
“Are you cold?”
“A little.”
He kissed her again and rolled over pulling a sweater out for her. She sat up, pulling it over her head. Another present from him.
He groaned putting his head in his hands as she untucked her hair from it.
“What’s wrong?”
She furrowed her eyebrows in equal parts confusion and amusement.
He peeked out from his hands.
“You have no idea how perfect you look right now. Ugh… I just… I like you in my sweater.”
She laughed.
“I like being in your sweater.”
“I’m sorry, my place does not deserve to have you in it.”
She took his face in her hands and shook her head.
“I’ve told you before, I think it’s charming.”
They stared at each other, their faces so close. It was something they were doing more frequently these days. Staring at each other in intense silences. Whenever they did it Alice was tracing the outline of his features so she could remember them perfectly for when she went to sleep. She liked to think he was doing the same.
“I want to make you feel as good as you made me feel.”
He groaned loudly, breaking all the silence.
“Ah fuck, Al, I’m going to take you home before I get carried away.”
Alice bit down on her smile. She had never spoken like that before and felt suddenly powerful over him. She did really want to make him feel good as well, even though she had no idea how to do that. His reaction made her want to try.
-------------------------------
As they sat in his car, parked around the corner from her house and with the windows all steamed up from them kissing, she was sure nobody would see them.
He pulled away and then moved back in for another kiss and then another and then he finally sat back properly in the driving seat with his hands on the wheel and shook his head.
“You really should go in, because I don’t want to be the guy who keeps you past your curfew.”
“Okay, okay, dad.”
He rested his head on the wheel watching her carefully again and she thought they might fall back into staring at each other, but then he spoke.
“I meant what I said earlier, you know. You’re fucking – I mean, you’re perfect. You’re just an angel and I don’t know what the… heck… what the heck you’re doing with me, but you are.”
“JJ, you’re -,”
“I love you, Alice Banks.”
She stopped and stared right into the face of this beautiful boy and this felt like all the romantic classics she had read and read and now it was happening to her.
“I love you too.”
you can’t hurry love – august 25th
“You want to take it outside?” Matt was in the doorway of her room pretending to punch the air. When she looked up from hurriedly hiding away her lip gloss that she had been applying, she saw he was holding a book in front of him.
“Mmm… I can’t today – I’m going over to Millie’s for this thing.”
Matt let out a low whistle, stepping further into the room.
“You know you’re the world’s worst liar, right?”
Wringing her hands in her lap and then hitting them against her forehead, she nodded.
“I am completely aware of that fact.”
Matt took a seat next to her, almost giddy in his energy.
“Well, I thought I was coming here for a traditional summer afternoon, so you now must pay the price of your secret.”
He spoke in a dramatic voice and ended it with an evil laugh. She rolled her eyes.
Taking a deep breath, she readied herself for telling him the only secret she had ever had to keep.
“Firstly, we just got back from our holiday two days ago, so I am not buying the disappointment,” She took another breath, looking at Matt directly, so it didn’t look like there was any reason to be nervous. “Secondly, I’ve kind of been dating someone this summer and -,”
Matt gasped.
“George?”
Alice’s face contorted into pure confusion.
“What? No?”
“Come on, that’s going to be the natural assumption.”
“Hmm… I don’t see how… Anyway,” She had to ready herself again. “I’m dating this boy called Jay, well, JJ, and he’s -,”
“What?” Matt’s face was now far from being excited about this news. Maybe George was the only acceptable person for Alice in his eyes. “JJ?”
“You know him?”
His face tightened and he took some time to reply.
“I know of him. He’s the guy who hangs around Owen Summers?” He put his head in his hands and sighed.
Alice did know that he was friends with him as she had looked at his Instagram and there was that time when her Dad was driving her back from Millie’s one night and she saw JJ and Owen in a car. She had noticed him immediately and he looked like a completely different person to the one she knew from summer walks and bedroom talks, but then he saw her and softened around the edges. She smiled at him then and he did the same, getting softer still.
“How did you even get caught up in that?”
She looked down into her lap, feeling small all of a sudden.
“And how old is he?”
“I’m going to be turning seventeen in a week; it’s only a two year difference.”
“Yeah, sure, that makes it all fine!”
Alice shook her head at Matt getting up from the bed in anger.
“Matt, he’s a good person, no, a great person. Just because he has a few bad friends doesn’t make him a bad person – he’s not like that. I love him and I thought you would be able to trust my judgment. Have I ever been wrong about someone before?” She stopped, pleading with her eyes, imploring Matt to respect her decision. “Do you know something about him?”
Matt sighed, turning away from her and then immediately coming back, kneeling at her feet.
“No, no, I don’t, I just -,”
“Then listen to me.” She spoke with a firmness that she was sure Matt wasn’t used to hearing from her unless they were in a heated political debate and it was never directed at him.
He nodded his head slowly.
“I will, I trust you.” He softened, pulling her in for a hug. “Come on, you know it’s my job to protect you.”
love will tear us apart – august 30th
She walked up to JJ in the playground that surprisingly didn’t have any children in it despite it being a hot day. There was an unshakable giddiness in her stomach at all of this. It was the first time they were meeting in daylight so close to possible people who could see them. How could she not think of their future together and how this could be them all the time? It was almost her birthday and she was hoping he would come to the celebration with George, Millie and her family.
He was sat in the swings as she practically skipped up to him.
“Hello, beautiful,” She giggled, delicately taking one of his hands. Suddenly she felt very shy being in public with him.
“Uh…” He looked up at her and her face immediately changed to one of concern.
“What’s wrong?”
There was a silence that could have lasted a little while longer for Alice. In the silence, he was still hers.
“I need to talk to you.” She let go of his hand and took a step back. How could she not see this coming? “I just… I don’t want to be with you anymore.”
It didn’t make sense.
There could be so many reasons why he would want to end it or the reasons why he couldn’t possibly want to end it, but she could only think of one.
“You said you loved me -,”
She was already crying.
“I didn’t mean it.”
She exhaled sharply. He wasn’t looking at her. There was nothing else she needed to hear from him.
He didn’t mean it.
With tears she didn’t try to wipe away, she turned and stormed off. He didn’t deserve to hear anything else from her and she didn’t deserve to be lied to by him.
“Alice, I -,”
At the faint sound of his voice calling after her, she walked faster so she couldn’t hear what he was trying to say.
don’t delete the kisses | jack + robin (flashback)
When Robin first read Jack’s text telling her to come round his, she’d tossed her phone to the side with all intentions of ignoring him and turning her attention completely back to the book she’d been reading. It’s not like Jack had done anything wrong, not really anyway. But with each day they spent together, she could feel her control over her feelings for him and more importantly - her control over the entire situation between them, begin to crumble. When she first started hooking up with Jack, Robin hadn’t expected any feelings to grow between them. They had been friends for so long that Jack should have felt like an annoying brother to her. He didn’t. He was still mostly annoying, but in an endearing way now, a frustrating way in which he now knew exactly what to say or do to Robin to unravel her, and she knew she couldn’t hide the effects of that for much longer. Ignoring the text was the best way to maintain that control, an unspoken cue that let him know that she didn’t need him.
She wanted him though.
So, Robin challenged herself to read for twenty more minutes before replying, and then another ten after that before pulling herself off of her bed to slip into shoes and slip out of the house. As she made the familiar walk to his house, she couldn’t help but feel puzzled. It was Thursday night - a night Jack, Matt, Leo, and Robin often spent together. Had they had plans to do something tonight? Robin pushed the thought away as she approached Jack’s house, reasoning that they must not, as it seemed Jack was horny and they’d been very careful at planning their meetups around Matt and Leo never finding out about them. She walked in and greeted Jack’s Mum, who gestured up to his room. Robin smirked as she opened his door, dropping her bag on the ground and stopping at the foot of his bed. “Wow, I thought you’d at least try to tidy up a little bit seeing as you were so desperate for my company.” It was only a tease, but it was enough to calm the odd flutter in Robin’s stomach that seemed to be growing ever present each moment she spent alone with Jack.
rhett peeked up at her, one of his hands resting on top of her arm and the other pausing for a moment with the tattoo gun in his hand. “stop distracting me or i’m not ever going to finish.” he told her, a laugh escaping his lips. he’d done a lot of her tattoos and she’d done a lot of his but it always took longer than it should when they were working on each other. he looked back down and went back to working on it, focusing on the lines he was making. “but you can tell me if you need a break. i know this isn’t the best feeling.” he added and paused so get some more ink on his needle before looking back at her face, a smile spreading over his face. “but i know you can handle it. afterall, you’ve put up with me after all this time.” he joked.
This wasn’t the first time a night out was cancelled due to an argument between Matt and Evie, but usually Matt would have rang Jack by now to complain or just to get very, very drunk. He hadn’t heard anything though.
Failed calls later, he let himself into Matt and Evie’s flat to hear blasting Arcade Fire and the stench of cigarettes and crashed glass on the floor. He finally could see Evie in the midst of it all and he felt anger. He always felt anger when he saw Matt leaving Evie in a state like this, but this seemed even worse than usual. They had been doing badly for a while. It brought him joy at the prospect of Evie being free, but anger always was the first emotion.
“What the fuck happened?”
Evie looked up, clearly a little bit drunk, and laughed without humour. It was the first thing she always did when she was mad, like it was a little bit funny.
“Matt’s cheating on me, but I’m sure you already know that.”
He didn’t. If he had known what would he do with that information?”
“He’s doing what?”
Evie stood up and approached him as if she was an angry bull. She was definitely an angry bull.
“Come on, Jack, you fucking know. Tell me who it is.”
“I wish I fucking could.” His hands were raised defensively, slightly terrified, and yet aroused, at the anger spilling from Evie right now. “He’s told you he’s cheating on you?”
“No!” Her mouth was bubbling, hurt wanting to spew out of it, but she fought against it. “He’s fucking denying it, but I know he is. I know it better than anything else. The fucking cardigan and -,”
She threw her hand behind her, to the cigarette ashtray and Jack craned his neck to see it. Evie didn’t even continue speaking as if this was enough of a conclusion.
“You found it?”
“Yeah, it was in our room tonight and he’s saying it’s Alice’s. Fucking prick!”
Evie collapsed into his arms and this was something he wasn’t used to. Never had Evie emotionally leaned on Jack, never had she wanted him to just support her. This was the closest he had ever felt to her and it, unsurprisingly, made him feel strong. Strong enough to find Matt and, oh God, he hoped it was true. He hoped this was the end of Matt and Evie and for him to bring the end to that would be the chef’s kiss to this masterpiece.
He had been the backseat of their love for now, but he was ready to take the driver’s seat.
“I’ll call him. I’ll get him to fucking explain if he’s cheating. He’s got to.” His hands were stroking her hair and he didn’t want Evie to stop needing him. His teenage self would be revelling in this moment, putting this moment on repeat forever and ever. All that would make it better would be for her to kiss him now.
But that would never happen in this current moment so the story had to keep moving along.
“Why would he do this to me?” She mumbled in his chest.
He got out his phone and rang Jack with Evie lying against his chest. That was thrilling in a way. He assumed he wouldn’t answer, but he did just before it went to voicemail.
“Ay Jacky, Jacky, Jacky!”
There was not a soul in the world who would say Matt was sober right now. He was the furthest point away from being sober.
“You’re fucked, where are you?”
He kept stroking Evie’s hair, as if letting her know he was going to sort all of this out.
“And tell him I fucking hate him and never want to see him again.” She half-yelled, half-mumbled from his shirt.
“Wouldn’t you like to know?” Matt laughed.
“I’m with Evie, I know what’s going on -,”
“Evie, beautiful Evie… Fucking hell, I’ve fucked it up. I’m an idiot.”
Slowly he was going from electric laughter to sullen loner in the matter of words. It was almost a confession. Almost.
“Tell her I’m sorry and it’s nothing…”
“Look, you prick, where are you?”
Matt hung up.
Evie looked up from his chest with teary eyes. The reveal that she was broken.
“What did he say?”
He shrugged, unable to say the truth right then.
“I could barely make out what he was saying. He was fucked. I’m going to try and find him.”
She narrowed her eyes, beginning to pull away from him.
“He really did it, didn’t he? You didn’t believe me before, but…”
She pulled away completely and slipped away from Jack, away from everything really. She turned up the volume on Arcade Fire and fell into tears on the kitchen counter.
This was the end of this beautiful moment, but the start of something building between them. Jack could feel that.
Maggie had the closing shift. It wasn’t anything worth mentioning usually, just a little longer before she got to sit at home with her plants and the parakeets. Everyone had cleared out of the main gym, and she’d just finished going through the side rooms. Putting away the equipment and locking up had become a soothing routine at this point. Maggie could’ve done it all in her sleep.
Generally made sure to take her time with everything else, giving the patrons a chance to clear out of the locker rooms and showers. The cleaning staff had keys and would take care of the sanitizing, but she was in charge of getting the rooms cleared and putting any gym towels through the wash.
Today felt different. She’d just finished clearing the woman’s locker room and had opened the door for the men’s when she heard someone’s shaky, raspy breath coming from the back.
“Hello?” She asked careful to keep her voice calm even as she itched for the firearm locked away in the safe at her house. “Can I help you?”
Date: September 16, 2019
Time: 7:00PM
Location: Sera’s hotel room
The hotel room door closes firmly behind her as Sera finally separates the outside world from the one which two sisters had concocted since childhood, unwilling to allow any other figures into her life at this time who did not share the same bloodline. Trust had been fractured, perhaps beyond repair, but enough for now to warrant immeasurable distance from those whom she had once considered family before discovering her own. "Do you remember what today is?” She finally questions her sister, whose time has been bought and paid for in a way which still overturns a typically steadfast stomach, yet it’s a terrible necessity to avoid her own discovery or the scrutiny of others. “I, um... I couldn’t imagine spending tonight with anyone else and I don’t really want to be alone right now.” And I missed you. @azrakaran
