Guess I'll just be distracted and upset by this thing all morning

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Guess I'll just be distracted and upset by this thing all morning
*I had this really cute date on the beach by the night with this lovely girl, but my brain is stupid*
Girl: So... we can go to my place and smoke another joint and maybe have some more beer?
THE STUPID ME: That's really sweet of you, but I have to go home by this time. *HUGS her, gives her a little kiss ON THE CHEEK and goes away*
I DID NOT HAVE TO GO HOME AND AT THE MOMENT I REALIZED THIS I JUST GOT EMBARRASSED TO FIX THINGS OUT - WHAT THE FUCK BRAIN?????
dumb people are always happy because they don't overthink
slightly panicking right now because I know brain will be stupid tonight.
Brain will start making me panic about why I have so many pictures downloaded of my favorite band...brain will tell me that I should be spending my time reviewing my fucking algebra and math instead of paying attention to this...brain will tell me I'm worthless again...
Oof
Life finally gave me a tiny break so I sat down to write my Cowboys AU.
But Cowboys weren't happening so now I have 1,3k words for the cat fic that idk what the plot is
I wish there was some way to record my thoughts and memories
Because every time one thinks of a memory s/he will change a detail so in the end the memory changes a lot from original event. WHYYYY ARE YOU LIKE THIS BRAIN. I want to remember everything exactly how it was, that’s all I’ve got left.
I just dont know whats fucking happening with me, because any little frustration (like my mom don't taking me to watch Fantastic Beasts) is pushing me down even more. And it's really dumb but I feel so bad about it and I just want this to stop