More alien x human AUs?? Please pls :D they're great for otp fics
(you probably already know this but i already did some over here !! )
(also if any of you use these prompt and write something, please tag me in it! i’d love to read/reblog it!)
“ok but what does this do?”“listen, this is really cute how you’re asking me all these questions but jfc stop i need to do some work.”“… what’s that?”“FOR GOD’S SAKE-”
“i know how you don’t need to sleep and everything, but please if we’re gonna share a bed can you at least pretend to sleep?”
“okay just because i’m from a different planet doesn’t mean i don’t know how to blend in.”“you just tried to dry your hair using the toaster”
“why haven’t you updated your status?”“because i don’t know how to explain to my friends that i’m dating a celestial being.”“…couldn’t you at least say it’s complicated?”
you’re the new exchange student and when i asked what country you were from you told me this country i had never heard before. so i looked it up. turns out that’s a codeword they use in area 51… o k
i taught you human swear words and you use them in really inappropriate situations… did you really have to say that at the funeral??
you told me that you had three hearts and i didn’t believe you so you told me to listen to your heartbeat. oh my god you really do have three hearts?? and why is your heart suddenly beating faster
i asked what you wanted to eat for dinner and to put it on the shopping list. ok i know you have ‘weird’ tastes but i don’t think i can buy an entire pig’s intestine without looking insane, where do you even find it?
to try and make you look less alien i had to make a disguise. it’s so cute how you looked so happy when you saw your new look, this is the purest thing i’ve seen all day
i had to give refuge to this runaway alien, unbeknown to the alien i’ve been paid to befriend the alien and feedback to the government about your behaviour. but holy shit, i need this money so bad but you’re honestly the sweetest person i’ve ever met and you’re not even a person
(alternatively) so the only reason i’m helping you is because i’m an undercover scientist who’s recording your actions and i’m meant to sedate you in your sleep (horrible i know) so that i could dissect you and examine your insides (it’s part of the job ok roll with it) . but now i’ve gotten to know you you’re actually the nicest person i know SO we’re running away where the rest of the scientists can never find us! c’mon it’ll be fun!! … i was hoping you’d focus on the positives
“there’s difference between making an impression and flat out telling someone that you’re not from this planet”“i think they like me though!!”“ok that is true, i think they’re into you”
you came round to my house with no warning and i thought you were a friend of mine, who knew i’m an alien, yeah i didn’t have my human skin on and you’re not my friend. i can explain!
“oh isn’t it your (insert length of time here) anniversary with Person B today?”“yeah yeah it is… we’re having dinner tonight, it’ll be great!”“you znark you haven’t told them yet have you?”
you told me you had a secret and i was made a joke that you were an alien and holy shit i was right for once
dude!! that is a cool alien costume! damn you’ve even got one of those realistic alien guns! that’s sick!
(additionally) that’s a real probe isn’t it
“you’re the cutest alien i’ve ever met” Person A laughed.“you’re the cutest human i’ve ever met” Person B replied.Taking a long sip of their coffee, Person C looked over at the couple. “It’s funny because you both know you’ve both never met a human or an alien before, yet you didn’t want to ruin the moment.”“You just ruined the moment why did you say that, Person C why?”
“aren’t aliens meant to eat people’s brains out?”“no you’re thinking of trillaxes. they’re dickheads, one of them killed my cousin.”“oh… i’m so sorry.”“my cousin was a dick too.”
“next time do you think you can refrain from explaining what the term; ‘verrecting’ is around kids.”“they liked it, i think so anyway! they found it disturbing!”“wrong word.”“no i know what that means. it was used in the right context.”“*sigh*”
