for ur shitty needs [requests CLOSED]

thank you for visiting!!

[awfulwhumpsideblog]

Some of my favorite magic side effects:

-Nosebleeds. Never gets old.

-Coughing up blood. The good ol’ “cough into your hand and pull it back to see blood” also never gets old.

-Headaches. You keep fighting as your head pounds, desperately telling you to take a break. At first they fade within minutes when you stop using magic, but overtime, they become chronic.

-Fatigue. After a big battle, you stand triumphant, and then just fall asleep on the spot.

-In a similar vein, overuse causing you to straight up faint rather than just fall asleep. Darkness begins to overtake your vision in the middle of battle, unconsciousness abruptly looming over you.

-Any of the side effects happening to another person. Maybe two close characters are connected, and whatever side effects character A would normally endure are transferred to character B. When A uses a blast of magic B screams loudly because holy shit that hurt.

-Magic gradually deteriorating your mind. Using it too much eventually caused hallucinations and an inability to retain memories, or even larger scale memory loss. 

Feel free to add more, I’m looking for some to steal

[liesmyth]

#personally im a huge fan of magic that burns you up#magic that causes fevers and ravages your flesh until you waste away#magic that holding onto is like trying to contain the power of the sun

[crimeronan]

oh look, it’s my wheelhouse!

magic as autoimmune disease. a force needed to sustain you that nonetheless is attacking your tissues/organs and will not stop

magic as necrosis and sepsis. an infection you have to cut out of you before it takes hold and bleeds through your major organ systems

magic as parasite. it needs a host. you need a body. it is growing inside you. eventually you will be formed around it instead of it around you. and then you’re its plaything forever

magic as electric current. fucking ouch!

magic as one of the worst things that can happen to you. magic as a death sentence.

i want to see more chronically ill and wasted magic users. give me people who have no choice in their deterioration, who are trying to slow the process or to burn themselves out as fast as they can. magic as an inescapable curse. magic as destiny (horror edition).

[ayeforscotland]

Tumblr is doing some stupid AI shit so go to blog settings > Visibility > Prevent third-party sharing.

[jondoe297]

also use Nightshade and Glaze to protect your artwork and images!!!!

here's a link to Nightshade

here's a link to Glaze

best combination is usin Nightshade then Glaze on your images. Glaze creates a protective layer and Nightshade poisons the A.I. software.

[rozentias-deactivated20240103]

small monetary things you can do for palestine 🇵🇸

itchio currently has a bundle of 140+ games for only $10, and all proceeds benefit medical aid for palestine

click a button to send money to help palestine via ad revenue (free!)

ask for a commission from these artists, who are donating the funds to palestinian aid charities. the thread also has lots of places to donate.

other artists or creatives who are commissioning - here, here, here, here, and here

another thread of charities can be found here

[onetwothreemany]

FEMA is doing an emergency alert test on all TVs, radios, and cell phones on October 4, 2023, at approximately 2:20pm ET.

If you live in the US and you have a phone you need to keep secret for any reason, make sure that it is turned off at this time.

Yes, I'm doing this months in advance, and yes, my blog has very little reach, but I figure better to post about it more than less.

Please reblog and add better tags than mine, I'm bad at tags.

[freedomisscaryshit]

Also, when you finally turn your phone back on, make sure you are alone or can otherwise midigate the sound. Because it WILL go off the second you turn your phone back on.

Please be safe 💜

[eroticcannibal]

I dont know if this will go as badly as the UK test did, but the advice for at risk people DID NOT WORK for us, many people had their phones go off despite turning off the relevant settings and turning off their phones despite assurances that turning off your phone would be enough to prevent the alert.

I would highly suggest that you do not leave room for technical errors and that you store secret phones in a safe location where it cannot be heard, maybe with a friend or loved one that you can trust. Or perhaps go out with your phone to a public place.

[kedreeva]

~~OCTOBER 4TH APPROACHES~~

If you haven't figured out a safe place to go or to stash your phone before now, you have less than 2 days left.

[filthy-rat]

pining: 👀

mutual pining: 👀👀

mutual pining where both parties perceive their feelings to be unreciprocated:

👌👀👌👀👌👀👌👀👌👀 good shit go౦ԁ sHit👌 thats ✔ some good👌👌shit right👌👌there👌👌👌 right✔there ✔✔if i do ƽaү so my self 💯 i say so 💯 thats what im talking about right there right there (chorus: ʳᶦᵍʰᵗ ᵗʰᵉʳᵉ) mMMMMᎷМ💯 👌👌 👌НO0ОଠOOOOOОଠଠOoooᵒᵒᵒᵒᵒᵒᵒᵒᵒ👌 👌👌 👌 💯 👌 👀 👀 👀 👌👌Good shit

[puirell-deactivated20221122]

an incomplete list of slightly weird AUs

journalist au / ghost (1990) au / ghosts au / ghostbusters au / librarian au / the mummy au / scientist au / farmer/fisherman au / marine biologist au / afl au / nfl au / nba au / pga au / wimbledon au / musician au / doctor au / early edition (1996) au / breakfast club au / back to the future au / archaeologist au / artist au / twitch streamer au / celebrity au / high school/uni au / ancient civilisations au / caveman au / surfer au / glee au / professor au / florist au / astronaut/passengers au / dune au / victorian au / medieval au / jane austen au / inheritance cycle au / gold is au / la noire au / cat/dog au / pilot/cabin crew au / cyberpunk au / steampunk au / solarpunk au / superhero au / fashion designer au / olympics au / game show au / american idol au / fortune teller au / roaring 20s au / f1 au / great depression au / 80s au / disco au / rockstar au / wild west au / hitman au / hollow knight au / jurassic park au / zoo/aquarium au / minecraft au / pirate au / war au / prison au / circus au / shire au / nyse au / startup company au / alien au / lawyer au / ikea au / president au / mailman au / secret agent au / hairdresser au / birdwatcher au / angel au / falafel restaurant au / biker au

[aegissi]

no talking stage I pull u towards me by our red string of fate and then we kiss on the mouth

[otterandterrier]

Tumblr and the No Good, Very Bad Idea

So. You might have heard the news that, as of July 12, Tumblr is testing out converting GIFs into looping MP4 videos to help pages load faster:

This is bad. Tumblr is the only mainstream site left where you can post GIFs and they’ll continue to be GIFs - well, sort of, as Tumblr previously tested and implemented turning GIF into GIFV with the same purpose, and it decreases the quality of the original GIF file. Turning them into MP4 videos is even worse.

GIFs are GIFs. They’re not videos. Creators spend hours making a GIF that will look good as a GIF, not as a video.

I hope I don’t need to explain to anyone why continuing to screw over creators is bad for a site like Tumblr, whose continued existence depends on creators not giving up on it, and why gif-making is important to fandom existence.

I for one will not continue to make any more gifsets if I know they’ll just be turned into MP4 files. It’s disappointing to spend my time making something and watch it become ugly once it’s uploaded - and that’s what is already happening without the MP4 conversion.

WHAT CAN WE DO ABOUT IT?

Don’t bother sending a support ticket! They will tell you to do what I’m about to tell you:

Send an ask or submission to @wip​ - the official “work in progress” blog of Tumblr where people can send in suggestions.

Their ask box is open every Monday from 6AM to 6PM EST.

The conversation isn’t over, guys, but it’s important to be a part of it. If you’re a creator or support creators (and you should), then set an alarm on Monday and go send them a message.

[staff]

This is 100% new and 100% Tumblr with 0% ads.

If you love ads, then this post is not for you. If you love Tumblr but hate ads and want the one to continue without having to endure the other, then this post is literally for you. Hello, you.

As of today, you can set up ad-free browsing on your personal desktop computer, from anywhere in the world, and then enjoy the same effervescent Tumblr you know and love (yes, including mobile) without the interruption of ads. Scroll away.

Some caveats:

It’s $4.99 for a month of pure, unadulterated nonsense.

If you like a discount, you can get 33% off (that’s four months for free) at $39.99 for a whole year. Imagine.

This is opt-in. You don’t have to do this. We won’t make you.

How do you opt in?

Easy! Just go to your Account Settings on desktop and hit “Go Ad-Free.” From there, you can choose to pay monthly or yearly:

And that’s it! You’ll be able to enjoy your favorite blogs and posts without any pesky ads getting in the way.

That’s all for now, Tumblr. Back to your blorbos.

[modmad]

I’m actually reblogging this original version bc there’s a lot of reblogs with various ‘takes’ on this and my sole contribution is: I like tumblr. I do and do actually want to help it survive, and this whole thing will add up to 60 bucks at the end of the year (40 if you take the offer) and that’s a year full of goofs and shitposts that I can’t actually live without.

I’ve had 10 years or thereabouts of quality dumblr for free I’m absolutely willing to give this hellsite a pat on the head for that

[ceekari]

new proposition: instead of going back to using ‘lemon’ again, let’s use a different fruit this time

I’m thinking… Apple

please remember to tag all your naughty posts with ‘Apple’ from now on

[goldenstripes001]

How dare you leave this in the tags

[edgebug]

genius. im in

[scrabbleknight]

I will tag all my shipping posts with Apple.

[sandraugiga]

It is the forbidden fruit after all…

[brainfuzz]

Yes! Different color Apples for different citrus

Orange=Green apple (everyone can read)

Lime=Yellow apple (Teen and up)

Lemon=Red apple (Explicit, NC-17, adults only)

Grapefruit=crab apple (explicit kink)

[cipheramnesia]

Better, use different brands of apple products.

[skadisprawl]

This fic is rated iPhone for everyone - if you want to read my AirPod-rated content, it’s all on AO3

[cartilogenophobe]

Or use other corporations

Microsoft - says it in the name; its soft, it’s fluff

Tesla - 16 up. (You gotta be 16 to drive) Basically the PG 13 to R category. Nothing super explicit.

Apple - NSFW, explicit, violence, but still within the realm of “normal” kink.

Amazon - the “You want it; We got it” of fics. It’s the super kinky shit.

[accessibleaesthetics]

Gentle reminder that your work-arounds for these tag issues should not include replacing letters with numbers or other symbols that will made the words illegible to screen reader users.

[accessibleaesthetics]

I’ve seen this mentioned a couple times in the tags, so let me assure you all that adding apostrophes should be completely fine. #’girl’ should not interfere with screen readers.

[accessibleaesthetics]

A few additional notes based on things I’m seeing in reblogs and tags:

Yes, adding a period work too. #girl. is very accessible.

Using numbers instead of letters does in fact make things difficult for dyslexic people too, this is an added disadvantage.

Using numbers instead of letters does in fact make you sound like a Homestuck too, this is an added disadvantage.

Using asterisks instead of letters to censor words is a bad idea, it can greatly impede screen reader users.

This only applies to tags, you do not need to (and absolutely should not) start censoring your post’s content.  

[postplus-protest]

Hi :)

First off: Really thanks for all the work you and @bannedtags do.

I see a lot of people screaming at staff, which I get, they made a lot of weird decisions but to some degree this website has always still been functional and we always found a way around stuff. I worked Customer Service myself, so here's what helps because people have to scream at Apple! And any other company who tries to sanitize the internet, otherwise I'll soon have to read fanfics on P*rnh*b.

1. Delete the app, leave it a really bad review, air your frustration and then change to Desktop. But especially mention APPLE in your reviews.

1.1. Leave a bad review on the Apple

2. Chat with Apple Customer Service and tell them!

2.1. Go here, click "Apps & Features" -> "Topic is not listed" -> Write App Update is a joke or something in the text field -> You should get the Chat option.

2.2. Tell them what happened (CS probably is NOT aware, no one tells them shit), and why it is ridiculous, if words like "antis*mit*sm" (<- ridiculous!) really should be b*nned and ask why this doesn't apply to Twitter, Reddit or Facebook apps.

2.3. If they tell you are at the wrong place with them, ask them where to go with this. Ask them for an email address. So you can send your complain there.

2.4. If they tell you, they can't give you an email address, be that person and ask for a manager (politely!!!!). Everyone that's behind an advisor, can do more shit and escalate it further until it reaches people who actually have to say something.

2.5. Be nice to the person you talk to, they're just trying to get around and any case DON'T leave THEM a bad review. However this survey is phrased EVERY answer reflects on the advisor, NOT on the company. People can loose their jobs over bad surveys, even if it's NOT against them. DON'T. DO. THIS. (If there's JUST a textbox for one question, like leave a comment, leave a comment there!)

3. Here's the thing, if enough people do this, Customer Service has to act. They can't be spammed with 500 chat requests over this ONE issue a day, keeping them from working on everything they should work on, like broken phones. If enough people do it, they have to escalate it further because they see it's indeed a problem for people and that it reflects bad on the company.

4. Just leave bad reviews for Apple everywhere and mention this is why. You can't review the Apple App Store, I believe. However there are multiple Apple Apps you can review. Also Facebook, Twitter, Instagram. Just write it in the comments, tweet at them, whatever :)

5. Does it do something? Maybe, maybe not. Still better than just screaming at staff for this.

Here’s some things that might be helpful for everyone!

[pencildrawer12]

For anyone having trouble reading the text in black (I’m hoping there wasn’t any good reason for it to be in black instead of white):

“2.1. Go here click "Apps & Features" → "Topic is not listed" — Write App Update is a joke or something in the text field – You should get the Chat option.

2.2. Tell them what happened (CS probably is NOT aware, no one tells them shit), and why it is ridiculous, if words like "antis*mit*sm" ( ridiculous!) really should be b*nned and ask why this doesn't apply to Twitter, Reddit or Facebook apps.

2.3. If they tell you are at the wrong place with them, ask them where to go with this. Ask them for an email address So you can send your complain there.

2.4. If they tell you, they can't give you an email address, be that person and ask for a manager politely!!!!. Everyone that's behind an advisor, can do more shit and escalate it further until it reaches people who actually have to say something.

2.5. Be nice to the person you talk to, they're just trying to get around and any case DON'T leave THEM a bad review. However this survey is phrased EVERY answer reflects on the advisor, NOT on the company. People can loose their jobs over bad surveys, even if it's NOT against them. DON'T. DO. THIS. (If there's JUST a textbox for one question, like leave a comment, leave a comment there!)

3. Here's the thing, if enough people do this, Customer Service has to act. They can't be spammed with 500 chat requests over this ONE issue a day, keeping them from working on everything they should work on, like broken phones. If enough people do it, they have to escalate it further because they see it's indeed a problem for people and that it reflects bad on the company.

4. Just leave bad reviews for Apple everywhere and mention this is why. You can't review the Apple App Store, I believe. However there are multiple Apple Apps you can review. Also Facebook, Twitter, Instagram. Just write it in the comments, tweet at them, whatever :)

5. Does it do something? Maybe, maybe not. Still better than just screaming at staff for this.”

[postplus-protest]

Reblogging for visibility issues in original post. Thank you @pencildrawer12 !

[exeggcute]

not to be overly serious (lol) but if you're mad about these stupid new ""safe mode"" changes on tumblr's iOS app you need to be directing your energy towards apple because, realistically speaking, there is literally nothing tumblr staff can do about this lol. they've either gotta follow apple's rules or get their app removed from the app store.

but also this is just part of a way bigger and longstanding issue with apple's walled-garden approach to software where you can only get shit that meets their very specific standards and doesn't compete with their own proprietary apps AND if users make an in-app transaction apple gets like, a 30% cut or something insane. this is why epic games had that whole thing where they took fortnite off the app store in protest (and which iirc is still part of a big pending legal case that'll have some serious precedent based on its outcome.....?) so like. this is actually just one tiny battle being waged in a full-scale war of online content and access and censorship and yelling at a bunch of ragtag mobile devs on tumblr's staff will fix exactly nothing, I promise. so go complain about it to apple!!!!

[exeggcute]

actually, extremely relevant example because I just saw someone mention discord as an example of an app with nsfw content that apple does allow in their app store (which means clearly tumblr's just doing this on purpose), but here's the thing: discord got fucked by apple too!!! on this exact same issue!!!!

earlier this year discord announced that iOS users would no longer be able to access "mature" servers from the discord mobile app due to apple's content rules. it was a whole thing. apple walked back the restrictions ever so slightly (so you can still visit servers with "incidental" nsfw content as long as you opt in to a certain setting, although I don't an iphone so idk exactly what that looks like) but you definitely cannot access Big Jack's Bareback Shack on your iphone anymore and it is unequivocally apple's fault. discord was gonna get banned entirely on iOS devices if they didn't comply.

[bannedtags]

A Growing List of Banned Tags

This is my second go at making this blog. The first time, I got shadowbanned immediately for writing a post with these words on it, so I’m going to have to link to a google doc instead.

You can find my current list HERE

If something is not on the list that does NOT mean it isn’t blocked. It just means I haven’t checked/added it if it is.

If you’d like to contribute tags you’ve found, please send it via an ask or submission so I can double check and add it to the list.

EDIT: Right now many of these are only banned on IOS, but that really doesn’t make it better

[kithtaehyung]

okay, writers (and readers!) please go through the above list, especially if you are one to really pay attention to specific warnings. now more than ever it’s going to be super important to list/read the warning list of written works before diving into a fic because just tagging warnings/tw will result in a banned tag.

[emswritingprompts]

101 ways to say i love you

firstly, tysm for 101 (actually 103, haha) followers! when i started this account i honestly had no intentions of having so many of you lovely people take interest in me, but i’m very grateful nonetheless! this is my gift to you all, and, again, thank you!

i’ve seen a few other posts like this, but i wanted to go ahead and make my own! this is going to be completely different from the others that i have seen as well, so there’s a lesser chance of duplicates for those of you who really enjoy these!

“You don’t have to do this alone.”

“I won’t let you do this alone.”

“I’ll always be by your side.”

“I’ll get that for you.”

“Let me bandage you up.”

“I want you to be a part of my future.”

“Here. You look hungry.”

“Come here, I’ll carry you.”

“I fed your pets while you were away.”

“Is something wrong?”

“Is there anything I can do to help?”

“I have an extra ticket… Would you like to go with me?”

“I saw you looking at it last time we were in the store together, so I got it for you.”

“Stay with me.”

“Thank you for making me smile.”

“Your smile is beautiful. I want to see it more often…”

“I want to kiss you.”

“You have a beautiful soul.”

“No… No! Come on, I can’t lose you!”

“You make me feel safe.”

“Don’t let me go.”

“Give me a brush. I’ll fix your hair for you.”

“I want you, and only you.”

“Your hands are too cold, I’ll warm them up.”

“Kiss me.”

“I know you don’t feel great, so let’s stay home today, okay?”

“You’re so beautiful.”

“Hold me. Please.”

“You’re family.”

“Marry me.”

“I took care of the laundry already.”

“Go back to sleep, (term of endearment).”

“I’ll protect you.”

“Take care of yourself.”

“Let’s take a break and relax.”

“You’re the first person I think about when I wake up.”

“You smell so nice.”

“Let’s move in together.”

“I wanna know everything about you.”

“Don’t leave yet.”

“Let me see your scars…”

“I remember when we first met…”

“Here’s your medication.”

“I have a surprise for you.”

“I bought this for you. It’s in your favorite color…”

“Your skin is so soft.”

“I would do anything for you.”

“I’ll help bring in the groceries.”

“Last night your feet were really cold, so I found some of your socks and put them on you.”

“I would go anywhere with you.”

“You’re cold, take my jacket.”

“I promise.”

“You’re so golden.”

“No one has ever made me feel like this.”

“I missed you… a lot.”

“Come back soon.”

“I got us matching shirts!”

“I know you can do it.”

“I’ll never forget you.”

“Wait!”

“I’ve waited so long for this…”

“You look like something’s bothering you… You can talk to me if you need to.”

“We make the best team.”

“I’ll hurt whoever did this to you.”

“You didn’t deserve that… You deserve so much better.”

“I want you to meet my family.”

“I want to start a family of our own…”

“Your back is so tense. Would you like a massage?”

“This is my favorite picture of us.”

“Don’t hurt yourself again…”

“You should be more careful.”

“Hey, your favorite movie is on. I’ll get the popcorn.”

“You’ve never let me down.”

“I saw that you were almost out of shampoo, so I went and got some for you.”

“You’re overworking yourself… Please take a break.”

“I named my little plant after you.”

“It’s an honor just to know you like this.”

“I didn’t make you uncomfortable, did I?”

“I never imagined that someone’s heartbeat could sound so amazing.”

“What was your childhood like?”

“You looked so cute when you were little.”

“You look just like your mom/dad.”

“What happened to you?!”

“Does it hurt?”

“I’m sorry.”

“I love waking up next to you.”

“Don’t be scared. I’m right here.”

“Have you been drinking enough water?”

“We can look out for each other.”

“I’d like to take you on vacation one day, just the two of us.”

“Are you sure you’re ready?”

“You’re so funny.”

“Do you want to help me fix dinner tonight?”

“You don’t have to pay me back.”

“No, you’re sick. You’re not doing chores until you’re better.”

“Your voice is so relaxing.”

“Text me when you get home safely.”

“I found this meme that I think you’ll like. Wanna see it?”

“Can I give you a hug? You look upset.”

“I’m yours.”

“I love you.”

[backhurtyy]

[digivolvin]

u know i’ve expressed my love for fake married/fake dating many, many times but like. is anything better. is anything better on this earth. does any trope or genre truly care for us quite like this one. let us reflect on a few of the gifts that fake married/dating consistently gives us:

character a asks “hey, will you pretend to be my date for a week for [convoluted excuse that could easily be solved without a fake relationship]?” character b, fully convinced of the futility of their DEEP AND UNREQUITED LOVE, figures this’ll be a chance to spend time with them and possibly put their feelings to rest. character b is always wrong & it is always amazing.

having to SHARE A LIVING SPACE FOR ARBITRARY FIC REASONS. having to see eachother in their pajamas first thing in the morning, messy haired, drowsy eyed and soft faced. going from “you can have the bathroom first” to brushing their teeth beside eachother and feeling like this closeness has always existed (at the same time, painfully aware that it won’t always). 

related to the last one – “"practicing”“ their casual touching so that it’s easier when they’re in public. feeling SWOOPS OF ARDOR AND AGONY when they feel the brush of a hand on their neck, or an arm loop around their waist. don’t you love how fake marrieds/dates are always method actors who must FULLY INHABIT their roles. i love it. i live for it. 

bed sharing. :^) we all pretend we’re bigger than this but we are not. 

"kiss me while everyone’s looking.”

the character who wasn’t aware they were in love (maybe always had been) until the fake relationship is in full swing, realizing they have to sort their feelings out before their time together is up. sometimes they succeed and angst is minimal. most of the time they don’t, really.

telling eachother “i love you” in public and meaning it, heart aching over it, but bELIEVING THE OTHER 2 BE ACTING. my soul is still 15, this garbage still gets me. u don’t get pining better than this.

the days leading up to the end of the arrangement where one of them, still confused and muddy about their Feelings and unsure how to break things off, stiffens to the casual, reflexive touching and puts their walls back up. the other one accepts and respects this as the end of their agreement and squashes back down all the hope they ever had, stuffs it next to the heartbreak they’re ignoring deep in their chest. 

when they realize they’re actually fully and enthusiastically mutual about the way they feel and it’s, like, two parts euphoria and one part agony because they just cannOT BELIEVE, the happiness tears them in two. maybe there are weepy or laughing kisses. i don’t know but i’m usually invested like 2000%. i love fake dating/marrieds. 

I LOVE EM.