Jun 16, 2021
The impostor syndrome hit so hard today, damn.
seen from Netherlands
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seen from Mexico
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seen from Italy
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seen from France
seen from South Korea
seen from Saudi Arabia
seen from United States
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seen from Poland
The impostor syndrome hit so hard today, damn.
Am I ready for classes to start up again? No. Is my professor talking about foregut, midgut, and hindgut anyway? Yes 😭
Registered for 4th year! Now, I'm ignoring all the studying I should be doing for Neuro to look at residency programs... at least it's a semi-productive procrastination? Lol.
Also, does anyone else's desk look like an explosion happened when they're studying??
October 29, 2019
I know this sounds crazy to a lot of people, but I love traveling alone.
Sitting by myself at the hotel or airport bar and having a glass of wine.
Not having to worry about anyone being packed and at the airport on time.
Spreading out in a huge king sized bed.
But more than that. I feel like when you’re in a new city, where no one knows you and you don’t know them, there’s no chance of anyone calling you and asking you to come over or do them a favor... there’s this sense of calm and quiet that I don’t feel like I ever can quite achieve at home in my apartment.
Like I could probably write the most killer journal entry on the hotel stationary, with the free pen they leave you next to the bed.
You look so happy, what changed?
"I learned to take more breaks and be less stressed."
4/7)
26/07/2019
It’s been 6 days since I started my 4 weeks of summer rotations, and this was my first day of being present for surgery (surgery is only on Fridays and Saturdays apparently).
I’ve been so demotivated recently. I’ve got 4 exams to resit in a little over a months time, and this has probably been the most difficult year I’ve had emotionally and mentally. I’ve questioned my place here more times than I can count, and every single day has felt like such a struggle until recently. Looking in the mirror today, though, made me feel so empowered. Standing in that operating theatre made me feel so empowered. It reminded me why I’m here in the first place, and I’m so grateful for everything, because as hard as it is to remember sometimes, it’s the difficulties that help us to grow and change and improve.
So yeah, this is me, aged 21, reminding myself that weakness is okay, and you can become stronger because of it. Oh, and to never give up on your dreams, no matter how many obstacles you hit along the way.
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Damn
Okay, I have a bit of a conundrum. I really want to take a break before med school, take the gap year I never had. Use the year living out my twenties because I'm pretty sure that once I'm in med school, my life will be a cycle of classes, homework, late night study sessions, sleep and repeat. I will never experience what it's like to be 20. My mind is already slipping from me as a pre med and I could really use the break but, I don't know how to broach the subject with my parents. Am I being selfish by wanting this?