#genital repulsed

[aroaceconfessions]

Hiii. So I may sound dumb for asking this and I don’t want to sound rude but how do you know you’re Ace? I’ve just found out about it but then I found out there’s different kinds and more? I’ve been questioning myself a lot and I genuinely don’t know what I am because there’s so many things that I get even more confused and I feel like I don’t fit in at all. I say im straight and I’ve said im straight but I don’t know. I always get asked if im lesbian because I’ve never had a boyfriend and I’ll be 25 next year. Heck, I’ve never even held hands with anyone (romantically), let alone kiss someone. My family and friends have asked me a few times if I’m gay or something because of it. I say I’m not, I don’t think I am. I’ve even thought maybe I’m bisexual because I’ve never been with a guy but then I think about it and I don’t think I can be romantically involved with a woman. I never wanted to get in a relationship while everyone was having their little boyfriends and girlfriends bc I thought it was too much of a hassle and it just didn’t interest me. I always thought they were too young (altho at the time we’d be the same age) and I just couldn’t see me getting with someone and doing all that stuff. Even now I just want to focus on myself and I don’t really think I want to get married or have kids. I’m okay with being alone. My family says that I’m saying that now and I’ll want to get married and have kids. I just haven’t met the right man but is it that? My friends tell me how great sex is and I need to hurry up and do it but I’m kind of scared. If we’re being honest the human anatomy scares me a bit. The lower parts of the body kinda gross me out? I don’t like watching porn or really talking about sex like that but I’m okay with reading it. I’m okay with art but not the real thing? I don’t know. Am I the weird one for being like this? Am I just stupid for questioning myself? Am I just straight with weird kinks?

Submitted February 6, 2023

[ace-adore]

Hey! I absolutely love your blog. So I have identified as ace for a bit now, but I can't seem to find anything that fits perfectly.I am absolutely repulsed by vaginas and penises and such, and I don't want them near my own vagina. But I would like to be eaten out (TMI i know...) . I don't think it counts as full blown sex, but what am I on the spectrum if that's the only thing I desire? Am I sex repulsed if I like the sensation of touches and kisses without the "dick inside you" thing??

Hello anon! I don’t believe these preferences would factor into needing to change your asexual label in any way? Even if you want to enjoy certain sexual acts, that doesn’t make you less ace. Asexuality is about attraction!

But it sounds to me like you might be genital repulsed rather than sex repulsed, since you want nothing to do with someone else’s genitals but are fine with sexual acts that don’t involve you touching them. I’m the same way! 

Just a little sex ed blurb: only viewing certain things (i.e penis in vagina) as actual “sex” is a heteronormative misconception. The lines of “full blown sex” and “not full blown sex” can be kinda blurry, but in your case of eating out: people call it oral sex for a reason! It’s no lesser than the act of penetration.

Hope this helped!

[aroaceconfessions]

I do not identify as aro/ace, but am wondering if anyone in the community can provide me with a term that may be used by folks in the community or adjacent — feeling repulsed by sexual organs — is there a coined term for that? I am not repulsed by sex itself, but if I think about/see in detail sexual organs, that is not great for me. Any terms for this? Wondering so I can look more into it. Thank you.

[aroaceconfessions]

tfw a gay porn game makes you question you're ace or not

im aware im not actually sexually attracted to the characters but i cant help but feel like im faking it or that im a late bloomer bc seeing the mc and another character do The Activity does make me feel stimulated even tho i know i dont want it for myself

(still highly disgusted by genitals tho. do not show those to me ever)

[aroaceconfessions]

As an ace with a history of religious trauma heavily steeped in purity culture, I don't even like looking at *my own* genitals. I can barely do anything at all with a partner, and the idea of going to a gyno genuinely sends me into a panic attack. So. That's fun ✌ (sarcasm)

[demigray]

Hey, I identify as demisexual, and recently started a porn blog (cos I wanted to) and since doing so, find genitals disgusting. So am repulsed by sex. Is this normal? I want to fix it.

It’s normal. Some allosexuals even find genitalia in particular gross. If you wanted to fix it, you could consider exposure therapy, though it is fairly easy to avoid seeing genitalia. 

[demigray]

I already know I'm on the ace spectrum, but I'm trying to figure out if I'm genital repulsed or not. I'm fine seeing genitals if it's in a neutral or artistic way (and I actually find nude art to be very beautiful), but if there is a sexual connotation I immediately recoil. Then again, the reaction can range from indifferent to uncomfortable to disgusted, so that is confusing too. Does this sound like genital repulsion at all??

Repulsion isn’t necessarily a consistent thing. You could be genital repulsed sometimes or in certain situations or to different degrees. Repulsion is a feeling of disgust, so if you feel that genital repulsion explains your feelings, you can call it that.

[theartoftransliness]

I wonder, if you get bottom surgery to completely remove your genitalia, will that stop you from getting aroused? I think genitals are gross as fuck, but seeing them in a sexual way makes my body react even if I don't want to, and I am incredibly grossed out. Now, I'm only genital repulsed, and not sex repulsed, so would removing the genitalia stop me from enjoying anything sexual?

Zak: I don’t think it is possible to have bottom surgery to completely remove your genitalia. I might be wrong, but as far as I’m aware the closest you could get to that if you have a vagina would be a vaginectomy (removal of the vagina). I’ve heard from trans men who have had that procedure that it has made them feel a lot better about their body. Of course, it sounds like your problem isn’t just a gender thing but rather that you are uncomfortable with genitalia as a whole so that might not be exactly what you’re looking for. I honestly don’t know what the solution to your issue would be.