Hawks is charming without trying, confident without seeming arrogant, and somehow manages to make saving lives look effortless. On the surface, he's the kind of person who could talk his way into anyone's heart with a grin and a wink.
But dating someone like Hawks wouldn't be all sunshine, feathers, and stolen glances.
Behind the easygoing attitude is a man carrying enormous responsibilities, a complicated past, and enough secrets to fill an entire agency. So, what would actually make him boyfriend material... and what might send you running the other direction?
Let's break down the green and red flags this man has, and you can answer by the end of it if you'd still date him.
🟢 Green Flag #1: He's Incredibly Attentive
One of Hawks' most underrated qualities is how observant he is.
His entire job depends on noticing details other people miss. He reads situations quickly, picks up on subtle changes in behavior, and can process information faster than most people around him. That doesn't just disappear when he's off duty.
As a partner, Hawks would likely remember the tiny things. The snack you casually mentioned liking three months ago? He'd bring it home one day without being asked. The fact that you've had a stressful week? He noticed before you said a word. The way your mood changes when something's bothering you? He's already figured it out.
What makes this especially appealing is that Hawks doesn't seem like the type to offer attention performatively. He wouldn't make a big production out of remembering details. He'd just quietly show up with exactly what you need before you even realize you need it. And his attentiveness would probably make you feel genuinely seen.
Of course, this could occasionally backfire because there would be absolutely no hiding anything from him. You can't claim you're "fine" when he's already noticed the change in your voice, your posture, and the fact that you've been staring at the same text message for twenty minutes straight.
🟢 Green Flag #2: He's Protective
Let's be honest: Hawks is the definition of someone who throws himself into danger to keep other people safe.
A lot of characters get labeled protective when they're actually controlling. Hawks doesn't really fit that mold. He respects people's independence and abilities. He doesn't seem like the type who would lock someone away "for their own good."
Instead, he'd be the partner constantly looking out for you.
Walking home late? He's checking in. Feeling unsafe somewhere? He's already on his way. Need help moving furniture? Somehow he's there before you even finish asking.
The downside is that he could absolutely overextend himself trying to shoulder everyone's burdens. Hawks often acts like it's his responsibility to fix everything, and that tendency could carry into a relationship.
🟢 Green Flag #3: He Always Makes Time for You Somehow
This might honestly be his biggest green flag.
Hawks is one of the busiest people imaginable. He's a top hero. He's constantly working. He's frequently involved in situations that demand his attention. Yet somehow, he still feels like the type who would make time for the people who matter because he chooses to prioritize them.
Maybe it's a quick phone call between missions. Maybe it's grabbing lunch together during an impossibly packed schedule. Maybe it's stopping by for ten minutes just to see you before heading back to work.
The gesture matters because it demonstrates intent.
His schedule might be a disaster, but he'd find a way to remind you that you're still part of his life, and those little moments would probably mean everything.
🔴 Red Flag #1: He's Emotionally Unavailable
Now we're entering dangerous territory.
Hawks has spent most of his life learning how to hide what he's really feeling. He's used to wearing masks, keeping things professional, and carrying burdens alone.
That doesn't magically disappear in a relationship.
Even if he deeply cares about you, getting him to open up might feel like trying to unlock a vault.
You'd know he loves you. You'd know he trusts you. But actually getting him to talk about his fears, insecurities, regrets, or emotional wounds? That could take years.
As a partner, this could create moments where you know something is wrong but can't get him to tell you what it is.
He'd retreat inward, insist he's okay, and try to solve everything himself. And for someone who values emotional transparency, this could become incredibly frustrating.
🔴 Red Flag #2: His Life Is Full of Secrets
Dating Hawks would mean accepting that there are parts of his life you'll never have complete access to.
And that's difficult.
His career revolves around classified information, undercover work, and confidential operations. There would be days when he leaves without explaining where he's going. Days when he comes home exhausted and can't tell you why. Days when you know he's hiding something but also know he legally can't tell you.
Even if you trust him completely, secrecy creates distance.
Humans naturally fill gaps in information, questions become assumptions, assumptions become anxiety.
Over time, that can put strain on even healthy relationships.
🔴 Red Flag #3: He Disappears for Work
If you're dating Hawks, his job is essentially your relationship's third wheel.
Hero work doesn't follow schedules. Danger doesn't wait for date nights. Emergencies don't care about anniversaries. There will be canceled plans. There will be missed dinners. There will be moments where you're halfway through spending time together before he gets called away.
And unlike many jobs, his absences often come with genuine risk.
You wouldn't just be frustrated. You'd be worried. Every time he leaves for a mission, there would be a lingering question in the back of your mind about whether he'll come home safely.
Even when he wants to be present, there will be circumstances beyond his control.
Final Verdict
The reality is that loving Hawks would require a tremendous amount of patience and understanding.
His heart may be with you... but his attention may not always be able to be.
Hawks is one of those people whose green flags and red flags are deeply connected.
Would dating him be easy? Probably not.
Would it be rewarding? Very likely.
The question is whether the green flags outweigh the red ones for you. So...
Woukd you date Hawks despite his red flags?
Absolutely, sign me up
Yes, but we'd need a serious conversation
Probably not. I need more emotional openness
No. The red flags outweigh the green flags for me.
Voting ended onJun 8
Feel free to add more green flags or red flags in the comments and I might share them in the following parts!
let’s play a question game because i’m tired and i like talking about myself + i’m curious about you’re guys’ answers
Rules: State 2 of your red flags, 2 green flags, 3 things you look for in a partner / life companion and make a collage of 6-8 pictures about what intimacy and love look like to you <3
EDIT: forgot to mention that this can be applied to both romantic and platonic relationships. Not everything is about romance.
i’ll go first
2 Red flags
1) High standards / Loses interest really fast. In general, i tend to get overly excited at first when i meet someone and im very eager to get to know them, but the moment i sense something not clicking i shut them off and distance myself. I’m nervous about being disappointed and slightly scared of intimacy. I mostly need to feel understood, like on a philosophical and psychic level (i feel like a goddamn book character, sue me) so if that isn’t the case, i’m not interested.
2) Overthinker / minimal self-confidence. I’m pretty insecure and feel like everybody hates me so it’s pretty difficult for someone to convince me that they genuinely like me as a person and they’re not in fact disgusted by me (trauma babe <3). I also tend to over-explain things and i get too into my head, being suspicious of everything and everyone. I also apologise like- a lot. Must be tiresome.
2 Green flags
1) Emotional intelligence. I feel like one of my best qualities is my ability to listen and at least try to understand other people. I’m very considerate and i always confirm my love for my beloved ones via poetry, art, physical touch and words of affirmation. I’m also a very sensitive person so i don’t judge and try my best not to make others uncomfortable.
2)Always has something to say. Yep, im a yapper and a nerd to the bone. I have plenty of interests and i’m a very curious person who always looks for meaning in things. Im also very animated when i speak, which may be annoying to some, but it’s certainly entertaining, for better or for worse.
3 things i look for in a partner
1) Communication skills. I feel like communication is the basis of a healthy relationship, without which there can’t be trust, sincerity and depth. Someone who’s willing to reach out, to talk things through and not give up immediately, to express their love, fears, dreams, things i could do on my part to strengthen our bond. Someone who makes their boundaries clear and asks whenever they are uncertain about things.
2) Intelligence / Interests. To be clear, by intelligence i do not mean “ Straight A’s, PhD, successful, NASA FUCKING APPROVED”. Nope. I mean in general, someone who thinks for themselves and has opinions, someone with interests and passions, real passions that give meaning to their life. Someone with a high EQ (emotional intelligence) because i could never be with someone emotionally unavailable.
3) A strong ethical compass. Someone who stands up for what’s right and whose ethical values align with mine. Someone brave and outspoken, who doesn’t tolerate bigotry, insensitivity, ignorance. Someone kind and gentle.
What is intimacy?
No pressure tags <3 @robintheoriedbyler @bylerfiles @justwhenbluemeetsyellow @miwihearts @miwiromantics @yourlocalbadgerscales @star-41306 @nommereranger @somewiseoutthere + anyone who’d like to join
A little note before we get into this one... This post was actually requested by one of you! 🩵 And I won't lie... this one was a little harder to write than most. Coming up with Shigaraki's green flags took some thought, but I hope I managed to do him some justice. 😅
Now, let's dive in.
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🚩 Red Flags
Poor Emotional Regulation
Shigaraki isn't exactly known for keeping a cool head. Especially early in the series, frustration, anger, and impulsive reactions tend to take the driver's seat. Instead of talking through conflict or stepping away to cool off, he often escalates situations immediately.
In a relationship, that kind of emotional volatility would make communication incredibly difficult. Every disagreement could feel unpredictable, leaving you wondering which version of him you're about to meet.
Trauma That Goes Largely Untreated
One of the things that makes Shigaraki such a compelling character is also one of his biggest red flags.
His past is heartbreaking. Abuse, neglect, manipulation... his life was shaped by experiences no child should ever endure. Those experiences explain why he became who he is, but they don't erase the impact they have on the people around him.
Untreated trauma has a way of showing up in relationships. It can affect trust, communication, emotional availability, and coping mechanisms. Understanding someone's pain is important, but it's never the same as being responsible for healing it.
Trust Issues
Shigaraki doesn't hand out trust easily. And given everything he's been through? That's understandable.
Building trust with him would probably feel less like taking a walk together and more like climbing a mountain, one careful step at a time.
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🌱 Green Flags
Authentic
You always know where you stand with Shigaraki. He's not someone who puts on a charming mask or pretends to be something he's not. What you see is exactly what you get, whether that's comfortable or not.
There's something refreshing about that level of honesty. You'd never have to wonder if he was being fake just to impress you.
Determined
Once Shigaraki commits to something, he commits completely.
His determination is relentless, and it can be an incredibly positive trait. It speaks to perseverance, resilience, and the ability to keep moving forward despite setbacks.
If that same determination were applied to building a healthy relationship instead of tearing society apart... that's a very different picture.
Capable of Growth
One thing you can't take away from Shigaraki is that he changes. He starts off impulsive and emotionally immature, but over time he becomes more strategic, more thoughtful, and more aware of the people around him. His goals remain destructive, but his personal development as a leader is undeniable.
The ability to grow is an admirable quality. It shows that someone isn't necessarily locked into who they were yesterday.
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Overall Thoughts
Shigaraki is one of those characters where understanding him and excusing him are two completely different things.
His trauma explains a lot about who he became, but it doesn't make his actions healthy or safe. At the same time, beneath all the anger is someone capable of growth, unwavering determination, and a surprising level of authenticity.
Sooo... would dating him be easy? Absolutely not.
Would it require an enormous amount of patience, emotional maturity, and trust from both people? Without question.
But that's also what makes him such an interesting character to discuss. He's far from one-dimensional, and his strengths exist right alongside some very serious flaws.
So now I'm handing the question over to you...
Knowing both the red flags and the green flags...
Would you still date Shigaraki?
Absolutely yes, I'm colour blind 🫣
I believe he's capable of growth... so yes, I'll give him a chance 🥰
