post-doing something awful guilt meltdowns my beloved. especially if the person they hurt has to try to comfort them. this shit sucks! what if someone felt bad but not bad enough to not do it again!
UH HUH i love when this is used to amplify the horror and like. centre the way it impacts the victim. what if someone felt bad but not bad enough to not do it again!!!
and the focus of this blog being what it is it’s like. a whumper who rapes someone and then collapses onto them, clinging and saying they’re sorry, they’re so sorry. the days after with the big anxious eyes, the fretting. the blatant guilt and worst of all the requests for reassurance.
“did i hurt you?” (it’s so obvious a truthful answer will just cause another sobbing breakdown, the only acceptable response is reassurance. is a lie.)
“i didn’t- you wanted it, right? you liked it? you wanted me to do that, you didn’t say no.” (hits especially hard if they DIDN’T say no but they still didn’t consent and it was obvious.)
“i’ll never do that again. it was so- i just- i’m so sorry, i’ll never hurt you like that again.” (and the next time whumper crawls into their bed or starts to touch them and won’t stop or crowds in too close behind them to trap them against furniture, the betrayal hurts so badly. but the time after that, they’re not even surprised.)
and the worst of it is how genuine the guilt and sorrow and self hatred is. whumper feels legitimately horrible when they see the marks they left, see whumpee flinch (and have to comfort whumper after), when they’ve climaxed and all they’re left with in the comedown is their dissociating victim laying beneath them shaking with tears streaking down their face. the guilt hits them like a truck. they feel so bad. so, so bad. (they’re going to do it again.)
