I was tagged by @gxdcomplex ! I don't know you yet, but send me a DM! 😊💖
Last Song:
Favorite Color:
Gotta be a deep dark red. It's the only color I regularly wear that isn't black.
Currently Watching:
The Magicians! A really fun fantasy show that a friend recommended! I've been watching with my girlfriends and it's been a really wonderful time. The main character is also the eggiest boy I've ever seen. It's a very big recommendation
Currently Reading:
I haven't read anything in so long... I'm slacking, send me recommendations!
Sweet/Savory/Spicy:
Definitely not sweet! I can only handle a very small amount of sweets before I start feeling sick. Savory is probably it for me
Relationship Status:
Currently dating 2 wonderful girls, and constantly making a fool of myself chasing more.
I love love love love love LOVE your art so much!!! It might sound minor or silly, but my absolute FAVORITE thing is how you do Asterius's hair, especially when its wet and long and falling over his snoot and in his eyes and it just makes me want to braid it or brush it out of the way to smooch his forehead 💜💜💜💜
thank you so much for the kind words! not even gonna lie, i really, really like drawing asterius’s hair like that - his usual done-up hair is fun as well (though i still struggle with getting it to look right), but drawing his hair “down”, curly and natural just makes me really happy, haha
Happy belated birthday! (This is super late, but i do hope you enjoy it!)
@gxdcomplex
Reinhart didn’t know what he was doing here. He didn’t understand why those men had taken him. He didn’t want to be here, it was dark and it was cold and there was water leaking through the roof. He sat on the bed, knees to his chest. They’d thrown him into this room hours ago, at least it had felt like hours. There was no window, no way out – except for the door that had been locked from the outside. Papa would find him. He would come and get him, he was sure of it. He rubbed his eye, exhausted after such a terrifying day. They’d set him on a horse, far too big for his little legs, and placed a bag over his head. There were still marks where they’d bound his wrists together. Rey hadn’t seen their faces since he hid behind his father’s legs…he would find him, he just knew it.
Rey gasped when the door suddenly opened, and e pressed his back against the wall. A man and a boy appeared, stepping into the room. The man reached for Rey, tugging the boy to his feet.
“This one’s a coward,” he snarled, looking Rey over. He held the boy’s face in his large hand, Rey’s little fingers trying to pry them away. “We’ll make a killer of you yet.”
“I don’t want to…I want to go home.”
Rey cried out when he was pushed back onto the floor, curling against the bed.
“You’ll learn. You had better.”
The man suddenly looks to the boy that had been silent throughout the entire interaction. “Ensure that he rests. You both have a big day tomorrow.”
“Understood.”
Rey noticed the way the boy stood – like a soldier, with hands behind his back, his feet shoulder width apart. The man simply nods in response, then leaves them in the dark.
He can hear the boy walking across the stone floor, sitting on the opposite bed with a heavy sigh. He removed his boots, then lit a lamp beside his bed.
“I want to go home.” Rey repeated, wiping at his eyes.
“This is your home now.”
“No…no, Papa is waiting for me. I have to go.”
“There is no escape. The sooner you accept that, the easier things will be for you.”
Rey sniffled, shaking his head. “Please…I just want to go to Papa.”
The boy sighed, then stood up and slowly made his way toward him. Rey found his back pressed against the wall again, making himself as small as possible. He crouched in front of the boy. The flame didn’t light up much of the room, but Rey could tell that the other’s eyes were blue – like a limitless sky, the prettiest he’d ever seen. They were stormy, the crashing waves of an ocean, like the ones in his story books.
“Are you hungry?” He asked, pulling a loaf of bread from beneath his cape. He offered it to the boy with a small tilt of his head. “You don’t need to be afraid of me.”
Rey sat upright, crossing his legs as he accepted the offered food. He hadn’t quite thought about it, but he hadn’t eaten since this morning. Since they took him.
“What’s your name.”
Rey hesitated before answering, but he decided that with someone whose eyes are so bright, he couldn’t help but trust him. “My name is Reinhart.”
“I’m Jackson. It’s nice to meet you. I’m sorry it had to be under these circumstances.”
Rey frowned, swallowing the bite in his mouth. “What circumstances?”
Jackson stood, then hoisted the boy onto his designated bed. “You’ll find out. You will learn.”
“I can’t stay. I have to go. Papa needs me.”
“I’m afraid you’ll have to let him go. Forget him. You won’t ever see him again.”
Rey’s eyes filled with tears, shaking his head, wiping at his eyes. “But what about Papa?”
“I cannot speak for him. Nor I for you. But know this…I will always look after you. Know that no matter what happens, I am on your side.” Jackson said, pulling the sheets back. “You must sleep now. They’ll wake us before the sun.” he said.
“Who are they?” Rey asked, laying his head down.
“Sleep, Reinhart. You will know more in the morning.”
~
The days turned to months into years. He’d lost count, forgotten who he was, where he’d come from. He spent his days training, becoming stronger, more agile and tactical.
I am not hard on you because I wish to be. But if I cannot teach you, they will. And Reinhart, you do not want them to teach you.
Jackson had been strict and hard on him, just like their “councillors” had been on him. Rey had never failed to see the marks painted across his body, his back, his shoulders, stomach, his arms. He always tried not to look, always spent their nights soothing his companion. Whatever empathy or remorse he’d felt he kept supressed. He knew there was no place for it. The institution was filled with orphans, each with stories that were comprised of memories distorted by endless hours of torture and manipulation, by governed thoughts and conditioned behaviour. Everyone is to obey. Any defiance will result in severe punishment. Jackson played by the rules, and he ensured Rey did too.
As a child, Rey often spoke out of term, and was punished accordingly. He grew up with bruises and scars of his own, with tears so heavily spilled from his eyes he wasn’t sure he knew how to weep anymore. He’d accepted that this is where he belonged now. With Jackson’s guidance, he learned the art of killing, the masterpiece of stealth. They were at war, a war that would help them survive. It’s what had kept Jackson alive all these years, and it’s how he intended to keep Rey alive too.
Reinhart sat in the library, reading up on strategical and tactical thinking; the avoidance of human error and how to annihilate one’s enemy with the least amount of damage. The councillors games were foul and cruel, pitting him against his peers, boys he’d known from a young age. Sometimes, the battle had a fatal ending. Much to Rey’s dismay.
Jackson found him in a quiet corner, sitting across from him.
“I certainly hope you aren’t plotting in that mind of yours, Reinhart.”
“I assure you, I’ve learned my lesson.” The teen assured. At , Rey had developed a kind of beauty that Jackson had never seen. For years, had watched him crow, had seen the cruelty he was capable of…a lot of it was a result of his own hand. But it was for the best. They were here, and now, well, at least they had each other.
“Are you learning anything new?”
“Nothing I haven’t read before.”
Jackson tilted his head, then moved to sit behind Rey, pressed against him as he put his lips to the other’s head. “Everything is in place.” He whispered. “It’s nearly time.”
Rey turned his head, connecting his lips to Jackson’s slowly, kissing the man with the warmth and affection he’d always felt for him. If it hadn’t been for those blue eyes, he wasn’t sure he would have ever survived this place. “Are you sure this will work?” he murmured, burying his face in Jackson’s neck. “We only have one chance.”
“It will work.” He assured, pulling Rey closer to him and kissed the side of his lips. “I promise you. We are leaving this place.”
~
The young boys were returned to their homes, the institution burned to the ground. On two horses, they escaped from a life that had intended to break them. Their faces covered, and their journey ahead was an unpredictable one. When they were deep enough in the woods, they set up camp for the evening. Sitting against a log, Jackson held Rey as he dozed off for the night. Jackson had never seen the world behind those stone walls, except for what little he’d seen in books. To him, the world had never been this green, the sky never cloudless. The only emeralds that he’d set eyes upon were the ones that gazed at him every night.
Now, he held Reinhart close to him, stroking his hair. They had agreed on their path. They would serve whatever man called himself king, destroy his enemies without leaving a trace. Whatever good that had once existed in them had long gone now. And surely, they couldn’t exist in a world where their talents would be socially acceptable by villagers and towns’ people. The world will be bloody at their hands. They had no other choice. This is what they know, Jackson reminded Rey. It is what they must do.
The king would pay handsomely, and they would live according to those treasures. Jackson only wished to offer Rey all the riches and wonders of the world. In order to do so, he knew he could no longer be no one. He must be someone, and with the king’s aid behind him, there was so much they could do.
Neither of them had memories of their past – of their home, their family. Everything was distorted, or had fallen into some dark abyss in the depths of their minds. All he knew was that he and Rey needed to remain together. His friend, his lover. So long as they were together, nothing could stop them.
~
After their expected report to the king, they returned to their chambers and closed the door behind them. Drenched in blood, their garments were heavy as they walked along the pristine floors, through a room that may as well have been a house. Jackson watched Rey, his confidence grew, and his guilt vanished. It was the understanding that they did what had to be done, that they deserved comfort after years of torture and punishment. Jackson reached for him, gently stripping the man of his mask so he could truly gaze upon that beautiful face.
“You did well tonight.”
Rey smiled, reaching for Jackson, and revealing his face. “As did you.”
Jackson pulled Rey close, and kissed him. In the institution, they’d seldom shown each other such affection. It was frowned upon. Any association with love had been shamed, and although they had shared kisses in public before, it was nothing like this. Like the way they undressed each other, tongues tied in a secret that only they know. Their hands and faces covered in the blood of their king’s enemies, fingers trailing over scarred bodies that they knew so well.
“This certainly calls for a bath. Wouldn’t you agree?” Jackson asked, whispering against Rey’s wanting lips, smiling as he led the other toward the bathtub that had already been drawn by the servants. Still warm, steam filling the room.
Jackson guided Rey into a seat, before damping a cloth, and gently wiping his young face of the blood they’d spilled. He still seemed so young, so impressionable. But Jackson knew he was an unbreakable wall, a barricade of confidence and stealth. He pressed the cloth to Rey’s cheek and gently wiped, moving under his hair line and under his jaw. “If the knight hadn’t moved so needlessly, we wouldn’t have hit his artery. Nor would we be covered in so much of his blood.” He said, wiping the cloth down his face.
“Speak for yourself. You slashed the other guard on purpose.”
Jackson smiled, tucking a finger under Rey’s chin. “A decoy, I assure you.” He said, leaning in and pressed his lips to Rey’s.
Reinhart smiled, a warmth filling him – and he dared to think it – he was happy. There was no one to control their every move. And certainly, they were the king’s tools but at least they had the freedom to be together. The king had no concern with their personal lives, so long as they made these targets look like assassination, he was happy which ultimately meant that he left them alone.
“Mmm, I’m sure.”
“it lured them away, didn’t it? We could have taken the rest of them…” Jackson murmured, kissing Rey’s neck, sucking on his pulse slowly.
Rey gasped, baring his skin to the man’s warm mouth. “They were not our targets. Our mission was clear.”
Jackson pulled away gently, smiling despite the blood on his face. Rey took the cloth from Jackson’s hand, and began to clear his face. “You have a good heart, Reinhart. But sometimes I fear it will destroy you.”
Now it was Rey’s turn to smile. “Are you afraid of losing me, Jackson?”
“You know I am. I never joke of such a thing.”
Rey stood up, pulling Jackson to his feet by his hands. “You won’t. I promise you.” He said, stepping into the bath. Jackson followed suit, sitting down at Rey’s gentle guidance.
Rey was shy of 19 now, a boy who’d grown too soon. Jackson was already 23, the age of a man who’d lived long enough to know there would never be a place for them. Rey straddled his beloved, and moved his hips slowly over Jackson’s bulge, pressing their foreheads together. Jackson held on to either side of the tub, easing Rey into an open mouthed kiss, coaxing the other’s tongue into his mouth, sucking on it slowly. There was nothing like the vibration of his moans, that knowing motion of his hips as he rode him with the passion he showed on their missions. Jackson’s hands moved to his waist, encouraging Rey to move as vigorously as he wanted. With a smile, Rey did just that, his face buried into Jackson’s neck. There was nothing more endearing than the sound of the man’s moans, his breathless voice as he called out rey’s name when he finished.
“That never ceases to amaze me.” Jackson murmured, catching his breath.
Rey laughed, a blush gracing his cheeks as he slicked his hair back with water. “I’m glad you’re satisfied, my love.”
Jackson smiled, reaching between them to stroke Rey’s shaft under the water. “But I see you are yet to be pleasured. That can easily be remedied.” He assured, kissing Rey slowly as he continued the motion with his hand, ensuring Rey received as much as he gave.
Rey now rest against his shoulder, soothed by Jackson’s calloused fingers stroking his hair and trailing down his back. “I can feel you drifting off.” Jackson murmured. “We jad better get you to bed before you fall asleep in here.”
“I’m not a child anymore. There’s no need to speak to me like one.” Rey murmured, brushing his lips against Jackson’s.
“I suppose you would’t want me to carry you to our bed either, then?”
Rey thought of the countless times Jackson had carried Rey into bed, had tucked him in and stroked his hand through his hair, sitting on the edge of his bed until he fell asleep. He had never quite outgrown the comfort that had given him, the first to show him kindness in the darkest of places.
“I wouldn’t object to that.”
Jackson laughed softly, and kissed his chin. Jackson helped rey out of the rub, then helped him dry off, pressing kisses to every inch of bare skin he could reach, over scars that would be a haunting reminder of their lives. Rey pulled on a draping shirt, while Jackson wore nothing but bottoms. Jackson scooped Rey into his arms, and as promised, carried him to their shared bed. Jackson lay on his side, gazing down at Rey’s sleepy face.
“I bid you sweet dreams, Reinhart.”
Reinhart smiled, leaning into Jackson’s gentle hand. “Jackson?”
“Yes?”
“Would it be alright if I said it?”
Jackson tilted his head, stroking Rey’s cheek. “Said what?”
Rey bit his bottom lip, looking up into eyes that struck fear in the hearts of men, but love in his own. He wanted Jackson to know. “That I love you. I love you. I want you to know that, from the very depths of my heart.”
Jackson looked down at the curve of Rey’s lips, pressing a small, fluttering kiss to the corner of his mouth. “It’s alright to say it. You never need to be afraid again. That, I can promise you. I swear it.”
Rey smiled. “I have so much to thank you for.”
“Shhh. Not a word. The only gratitude I need is waking up to you every morning. Without you, I am nothing.” Jackson said. “Until you, I didn’t think I was capable of love or compassion, or even a smile. But now here we are, and there is no one I love more than you.” Jackson smiled, pressing their foreheads together.
Rey closed his eyes, listening to Jackson’s breathing. He opened his eyes once more. “You love me?”
Jackson smiled, a blush gracing his cheeks. “I love you.”
Rey’s smile brightened as he pulled Jackson close to him, kissing his temple before finally closing his eyes with the reassurance that things would be okay. Things were going to be just fine.
