> Dirk: (Attempt to) Recover.
As everyone reading this knows, your name is Dirk Strider, and you are a fucking god. It’s no secret to your Tumblr audience that having become your ultimate self, you are unimaginably powerful, infallible, and every other SAT word that could be considered a character trait of a “pretentious jackass” — sorry, “majestic deity.”
So, imagine your surprise when out of nowhere, the ship that you stole —or borrowed in perpetuity — suddenly changes its flight path into a literal circle, rather than the metaphorical one that it’s essentially always been in. It takes less than a nanosecond for you to understand what just happened. Not that you needed to see the Pizza Hut logo on the only screen not playing some freakish Funko Pop gibberish to figure it out, because you didn’t.
The first thing you do is message Hal.
TT: Hey, dude? TT: What the fuck just happened?
=>
When your brain clone makes it clear that he has no intent on fixing Pizza Hut's retaliation, you decide to take matters into your own hands. Not that it'll take you more than a second to readily narrate the resolution to this stupid little game. It's easy.
With ease, Dirk figures out what he has to do to put an end to this, because what caused it to happen in the first place was an obvious oversight. Dirk fixes what needs to be fixed, and everything goes back to the way it should be.
Nothing changes. The ship continues flying in circles. The screens continue playing that stupid movie at twice the speed, on loop. You still have no idea what you're supposed to do.
On another metaphorical sheet of paper, in red metaphorical ink:
Actually, none of this is obvious, especially not to Dirk, and [...]
Underneath your shitty triangle glasses, your stoic 'tude falters.
DIRK: Hey, Hal? DIRK: Stop narrating against me.
Your request goes unanswered.
