genre. fluff. headcanons.
warnings. these are kinda disorganized rly random but oh well.
pairing. hanse x reader.
wc. 803.
request. not officially requested by still requested by @eternalgyu <3
a/n. i miss victon sm goodbye... (but first hanse fic so yay)
hanse has always noticed that you eye his tattoos. especially after you’ve been dating for a little while and got more comfortable with each other, you’re more obvious with your stares. but you’re still too scared to ask for a tour, and hanse thinks it's cute, that you’re so shy about it, not wanting to pressure him.
he offers to show you them up close one evening. you listen intently as he tells you the meaning behind each one, giggling at how some of them were honestly dares or jokes. he lets you trace each one, not leaving out how he had covered old ones with new ones. it starts out with just the ones on his left arm, but when he sees that you’re still curious about the ones he got on his chest and back, he isn’t shy to take off his shirt and show you. you’re a little shy being met with his bare back and chest, but also in awe of both his muscles and the pretty black ink decorating his soft skin.
after that you start to make it your habit to trace his tattoos. it’s soothing, both to you and hanse. he likes it more than he would admit, and in a way it makes him feel loved and pretty to you. to see that you’re so in love with the artwork on his skin, that you don’t think it’s too much or weird, it makes his chest feel warm.
you feel the same way about his piercings, and are always excited when you find cool new jewelry for him to try. some days he goes without his lip ring, but on days that he is wearing it, he can tell that you get a little extra clingy. kissing him and feeling the cool metal against your skin never gets old.
hanse has his own unique style, and you love to play around with it with him. it’s always heavily reliant on black. he’s experimented a lot in the past to find what he likes best and what feels like him, and he found that black is exactly what feels right. knowing that colour is often out of the picture, when you style him, you like to add elements of texture instead. spiky chokers and bracelets, silver or black rings, even pretty belts. it’s fun to match with accessories, even if you both have opposite senses of style.
if you like your outfits to be colourful, you can still match with jewelry. or, if you like black outfits like hanse, he’ll buy you matching shirts so you can have fun styling it in different ways. while most of the time your boyfriend adorns black band shirts, tank tops, or hoodies, accessorised to the max with shiny silver, sometimes he does like to wear more traditional clothes. button ups or white t-shirts, occasionally a suit or sweater. it’s rare, but you love it all the same as his usual aesthetic.
if hanse had to describe his relationship with you, it would be comfort and laughter. you’re his person. someone who loves him just the way he is, who doesn’t expect or want anything outside of what he already offers. you make him smile, you make him laugh, you make him feel so in love every day. one look at your eyes and he can feel that things aren’t as bad as they seem, that they’ll be okay as long as you’re with him. you make him forget about his worries and allow him to live in the moment, to enjoy every second he gets to spend.
you’re so connected emotionally that any time you have to spend apart from your boyfriend is rough. you’re used to being around him all the time— having almost everything you do in a day accompanied by your favourite person in the entire world. you make do with texting and calling as often as you can. you’d spend hours on video call, even if you were outside running errands. it doesn’t compare to actually being together, but it’s enough to make it bearable.
you know that despite his appearances, your boyfriend has a very soft heart. he’s empathetic and scared of a lot of things, but you help him overcome things that once terrified him. you slowly become his home. and overtime he can barely remember what his life looked like without you; only that it could never compare to what he has now. hanse thinks you’re precious. he adores you, frankly. he’s not ashamed that he’s absolutely whipped, that everytime he sees you his eyes light up, or that he’ll never get tired of telling you that he loves you. it’s a truth that will never change, and he’d shout it out for the whole world to hear if he could.
↳ victon taglist (bolded could not be tagged): @eternalgyu,, @minholing,, @candewlsy,, @blossominghunnie,, @weird-bookworm,,
Hello! Could you do making out with Victon please?
With pleasure! ♡
So since you didn't request a specific format like headcanons, I decided to do a little drabble for each member, but then I got carried away so those "drabbles" turned into about 600 words per member sjfxlmxsjnlsmhgsxslkjkm - I'm so sorry if that's not what you wanted -
Also it became a bit smuttier than I initially intended, oops- Like it's not full-on smut, but I guess "suggestive" would be an understatement...
Sorry this is so chaotic, I just get really hyped about victon 💗
Note: I don't write about Chan, so he is not included in this post.
18+ content ahead!
± 600 words per member
Seungsik
The late-afternoon sun cast its light on your skin as you sat on the edge of the pool and dreamily dangled your legs into the water. "I got the towels!" Seungsik called from behind you. When you turned around, you were greeted by his wide, happy smile as he came up to you, carrying two large beach towels.
He tossed the towels into a chair and jumped into the water without hesitation. "Come join me, the water is lovely!" he said, full of excitement, while reaching out his hand. You allowed him to help you into the water and once you were in the pool, Seungsik immediately pulled you against him.
His wet hair stuck to his forehead and your faces were so close to each other that some of the drops from his hair landed on the tip of your nose. You pressed a soft kiss on his lips and then pulled away to look into his gorgeous eyes, only to be met with a mischievous grin on his face. "Is it hot in here, or is it just you?" he said while snaking his arms around your waist.
You scoffed at him, in disbelief that he could be so greasy, and you pushed yourself away from him. "If you're so hot, then maybe you should cool down a little," you replied while mirroring the look of mischief from his face. Then you pushed him completely underwater, but Seungsik immediately got his revenge as he pulled you right down with him.
Both of you gasped for air when you came up again. He coughed while you were still trying to wipe the water out of your eyes, but you both laughed happily. "That's what you get for trying to drown me," Seungsik said while he swam back to you. You gave him an offended look and splashed some water at him. "No, that's what YOU get for being so cheesy all of a sudden!" He turned his head to dodge the water from hitting his face and laughed.
Suddenly you felt his arms around your waist again as he pulled you back against him and he pressed a kiss on your lips. Before you could properly kiss him back, he pulled away just enough to look you in the eyes and grinned. "Don't pretend you don't like it..." Your felt your cheeks getting hot from his comment. You wanted to say something witty in return, but for once you were speechless.
He gently took both of your hands in his own and gave each of them a kiss, after which he guided them to his neck. Following his gentle guidance, you wrapped your arms around his neck and dug your fingers into his hair. When he kissed you again, you could feel his smile against your lips. This time you wouldn't let him pull away and you held on tightly to his neck as you kissed him back. His lips were still wet from the pool water, which just made it all the more hot to you.
His hands moved from your waist down to your hips at a pace that was almost provokingly slow. Then down to your butt and even further down to the back of your thighs, suddenly lifting you up so you could wrap your legs around his waist. "You're so hot..." you whimpered against his lips, while he carried you through the water, towards the edge of the pool. Even when he sat you down on the edge, you kept your legs wrapped tightly around him, making him chuckle a little bit. In an ideal world, you would never have to let go of his warm embrace.
Seungwoo
Seungwoo sat on the couch, reading a book when you entered the room. Aside from one of his t-shirts, you had absolutely no clothes on. He noticed you right away and raised his eyebrows in that unique way he always does. "Well hello," he said with a little laugh and he shut his book. "Couldn't you find your underwear this morning?"
You looked down at yourself as if you had no idea what he was talking about and shrugged in feigned ignorance. "Nope," you replied while you walked into the kitchen, "do you want some coffee?"
Seungwoo got up from the couch without replying and he stood closely behind you while you made the coffee. He laid one of his hands on your hip and he used the other to play around with the edge of your shirt - or rather his shirt, which you were wearing. He brought his face to your neck, letting out a little sigh while he brushed the tip of his nose against your skin. "You really know how to get my attention..." he mumbled, sending a slight shiver down your spine.
Still you decided to act completely ignorant as you turned to him. You looked into his tapioca pearl eyes and smiled innocently. "Have you had breakfast yet?" you asked.
This was enough to set him off. He took your wrists in his hands and pushed you with your back against the wall, pinning your hands above your head. He pressed himself against your body and began to kiss you passionately on your lips. A little squeal escaped you as you felt how he pushed one of his legs in between yours and pressed it against your sensitive area.
He grinned against your lips, now letting go of your wrists in order to wrap his arms around your waist and pull you even more tightly against him. Then he removed his lips from yours and brought them to your neck instead, hungrily kissing you right next to your jaw.
The intensity of his kisses and his hold on you made you weak in the knees. At this point you were glad he held you so tightly, because you might have lost your balance otherwise. Not that you minded at all. You loved to surrender yourself to him. Having him all over you was one of the best feelings in the world - as if you had a warm, loving shield around you, that also happened to be a great kisser, among other things.
He continued to kiss your neck while his slender fingers hooked themselves under your shirt and he began to tug on it. You instinctively raised your arms and before you knew it, Seungwoo had already pulled the shirt over your head and tossed it somewhere into the room. You wrapped your arms around his neck for support while his lips returned to yours again and you pushed your tongue into his mouth, making him moan happily.
"I've already had breakfast..." he mumbled against your lips. His hands moved down from your waist to your hips and you could feel how his grip tightened around your butt. "...but I'm starting to get hungry for lunch," he continued and suddenly you felt how he lifted you up and sat you down on the counter. You squealed as he pushed your legs apart and placed himself in between them. He gave you one final, intense kiss on the lips and then began to trail his kisses down from your neck to your chest, all the way down until his mouth was right between your legs.
Sejun
It was late and night. Neither you or Sejun were able to sleep, so you had decided to watch a movie together. You sat in your favorite spot; in the corner of the couch, and Sejun sat next to you, resting his head on your shoulder.
"I'm thirsty," he whined all of a sudden. You laughed a little, until you saw how he looked at you with those puppy eyes, letting you realize who was gonna have to solve this problem for him. "What, you want me to get it for you?" you asked in disbelief and he nodded sweetly.
With a groan, you got up from the couch and went into the kitchen to grab a glass of water for him and you took one for yourself while you were at it. But when you returned with the water, you saw that Sejun had taken your favorite spot on the couch. Even though he was smiling innocently, he knew very well that was YOUR spot.
"Lim Sejun," you said sternly, "you better get out of that spot right now." He grinned at you, distracting you with the exposure of his beautiful dimples and he shook his head stubbornly. "I don't want to! It's comfy..." You attempted to pull him away from your spot, but Sejun still refused to go anywhere.
Eventually you gave up and decided to get back at him by sitting down on his lap, facing the TV. He looked a little surprised, but satisfied with the outcome. His arms wrapped around your waist and he rested his chin on your shoulder again, but you weren't so keen on letting him have his way. In order to distract him from the movie, you began to grind yourself back and forth on his thigh.
Almost immediately, you felt how he slowly began to get hard and he nervously attempted to shift into a different position. By now Sejun wasn't the only one who began to get needy and you turned around on his lap so you were facing him. You cupped his face with your hands and began to press gentle kisses on his lips. He returned your kisses with the same gentleness and placed one of his hands on the back of your head, softly stroking his fingers through your hair.
You could feel a smile growing on his lips as your kisses became more passionate and you stroked his lovely dimples with your thumbs. "Why do you have to be so cute," you mumbled in between kisses, causing him to grin happily. He moved both of his hands down to your hips and held them tightly as he slowly began to move them for you, making you grind on his thigh again.
You let out a surprised moan and pulled your lips away from his to look into his eyes, which had a little sparkle in them. He was so beautiful when he smiled at you like this. "Don't stop," he said with a husky voice while urging you to keep grinding on his thigh. With flustered cheeks, you obeyed and began to move your hips with more intensity.
A satisfied smirk showed on Sejun's lips and he placed his index finger under your chin to guide your lips back to his. When you felt his tongue brush against your lips, you greedily parted them for him. Both of you let out content little moans as your kisses grew more passionate and hungry and the way you were grinding on his thigh got more desperate.
Let's just say you both missed the entire plot of the movie you were watching...
Hanse
Hanse had been rapping loudly in your ear for several minutes now. Of course he was a great rapper and usually you loved to hear him show off his talents. But not at 2 am when you were trying to sleep. You'd had a long day and wanted nothing more than to close your eyes and drift off, but Hanse still had a lot of energy and didn't feel like shutting up just yet.
He brought his lips so close to your ear that you could feel his breath on your skin as he rapped a part from Take Over and you groaned loudly in annoyance. Finally you had enough and turned to him. You roughly grabbed his chin and pulled him closer to you so you could press your lips on his to shut him up. When your lips detached, you looked him in the eyes and said "I love you very much but please shut the fuck up."
He looked flustered from your sudden kiss. There was a dark blush on his cheeks and a little giggle escaped him. But just when you thought he would finally be quiet, he began to rap his second verse from What I Said: "When I spit bars on this beat, they call it fire, go tell 'em I killed this, man I gotta go harder-"
You pressed your lips on his again and this time also pushed him down into the mattress. Without breaking the kiss, you crawled on top of him. You knew damn well that he just did that so you would kiss him more, but you didn't care. At least he shut up this way.
He grinned so much that you could feel the corners of his mouth curl up as you kissed him. He gently brushed his tongue against your lips, nearly begging for you to let him in. Though you didn't think he deserved to be kissed like that, you enjoyed it too much to refuse, so you reluctantly parted your lips for him.
He put his hand on the back of your neck to pull you even closer to him and he let out little moans as he greedily accepted your kisses. But when he got too excited, you put him in his place by pushing his shoulders back into the mattress, forcing him to stay down. A soft whimper escaped him and he squirmed beneath you in enjoyment.
After a while, you pulled your tongue back from his mouth, but didn't stop kissing him just yet. Rather than pulling away completely, you sucked on his lower lip a little and nibbled on his piercing, fully aware of how horny that made him. He squealed and bucked his hips up at you, brushing his bulge against your inner thigh.
Satisfied, you pulled away and grinned down at him. "Alright, let's go to sleep." He immediately pouted at you and took your hand in his. "Nooooo you can't do that to me! Please!" he whined and he began to press kisses on your hand. You looked down at him without saying a word, but couldn't help but smile a little. He smiled back at you and continued to press tons of kisses on your hand, moving up to your wrist. "Please," he begged, "please let me fuck you first."
You scoffed at him and let out a defeated sigh. "Fine," you groaned, "as long as you know that you don't actually deserve it after being so annoying." He nodded enthusiastically and swiftly pushed you down into the mattress so he could get on top of you. He immediately brought his mouth to your neck and began to place kisses al over it, whispering "I don't deserve you" against your skin.
Byungchan
You sat at your desk with your study materials in front of you. In only two days, you would have a major exam for a course you really struggled with. You had been studying for days already and even though it was going somewhat decently, it took a lot of effort to even understand the littlest things.
You looked up when you heard a knock on the door and Byungchan entered the room. "Hey y/n, are you coming to bed soon? It's 11 pm.." A smile appeared on your face, because having Byungchan around felt like a wave of relaxation after attempting to study for hours. But that smile soon disappeared when you remembered how much work you had left to do.
"I'm sorry honey, but I still have too much to do. I can't just stop yet. If you're really tired you can go to bed without me." Byungchan shook his head and sat down on top of the desk, right next to your study materials. "No, it's not that I'm tired..." he said while picking up your book to have a look at what you were studying. After reading a small paragraph, he quickly put it back down with a mildly disgusted look on his face. "...I just miss your company."
You took his hand and played around with his fingers. His hand was warm and soft and it became so tempting to join Byungchan into the bedroom, but you stayed strong and shook your head. "Not yet. I have to finish this first." Byungchan got up from the desk and stood behind you, laying both of his hands on your shoulders. "How long do you think you need?" he asked, while he gently began to massage your neck and shoulders for you.
You slowly felt yourself getting hotter, but you still picked up your book and returned to the right page. "I don't know honey. Another hour at least..." you sighed.
"Hmmm," was all he replied. He continued to massage your shoulders while he brought his face to your neck and pressed a kiss on your skin. You ignored him and continued to read from your book, but goosebumps began to cover your skin as he pressed more and more kisses onto your neck, while his hair tickled against your cheek.
You froze when you suddenly felt his tongue on your skin and a little shiver went down your spine when you realized he was giving you a hickey. "Hey, I'm trying to study!" You meant to say it sternly, but it came out as a pathetic whimper. He chuckled and the way his breath brushed against your skin made another shiver go down your spine.
You put the book back on the desk and stood up from the chair, turning to him. "Okay how about this: I give you 10 minutes, but after that you have to leave me alone so I can study. Do we have a deal?" He nodded and immediately locked his lips with yours, making you let out a little gasp. His arms snaked around your waist in order to pull you tightly against him and he hummed happily against your lips as he kissed you.
You were a little taken aback by his enthusiasm, but it also turned you on and you wrapped your arms around his neck in return. You slowly shuffled backwards to the desk and sat down on it, pulling him closer to you. He cupped your face with his hands while he kissed you, stroking both of your cheeks before suddenly pulling away from you with a big smirk and sparkly eyes. "10 minutes right?" he asked and you nodded. "That should be enough," he said and then he locked his lips with yours again, while guiding your hand down to his crotch.
Subin
It was a beautiful spring day and since the weather was so good, you and Subin decided to get ice cream together. The birds were happily singing their songs as the two of you entered the park with your ice cream. He got chocolate flavor, while you got vanilla. "Maybe we could sit over there," you said, pointing to an empty spot in the grass. And thus you sat down in the field together, bathing in the sunlight while being surrounded by tons of little flowers.
After finishing the last bite of his ice cream, Subin lay down in the grass and closed his eyes in satisfaction. "Are you photosynthesizing?" you asked him with a little giggle. He pouted at your mockery and opened one eye to look at you. All of a sudden, he sat back up and pointed at your lower lip. "You have something on your face."
"Oh-..." Your cheeks flushed in embarrassment and you brought your hand up to your lip to wipe off the little drop of vanilla ice cream, but Subin firmly grabbed your wrist to stop you. "I'll handle that," he smirked and before you knew it, he was licking the spilled ice cream right from your lip. "SUBIN!" you squealed and you quickly pushed him away, completely flustered.
He just laughed and even had the audacity to lick his lips. "Hmm, you taste nice. I should have gotten vanilla too," he said with a huge smirk, while you were still trying to come to your senses. "Subin, we're in public," you mumbled and you subtly tried to look around to see if anyone had noticed. "So what? People kiss in public all the time," he replied, still with a smirk on his face. "Yeah and that's gross," you murmured in response.
He chuckled and inched a little bit closer to you again. "How can love be gross?" You felt how his index finger hooked underneath your chin and directed your face towards him while he brought his lips back to yours. "I want another taste," he whispered under his breath and then your lips connected again.
Since you weren't caught off guard this time, you could clearly taste the chocolate from his own ice cream on his lips. The combination of lingering chocolate flavor from Subin's lips and the vanilla flavor from your own created a kiss that was almost oreo flavored. The sensation was almost overwhelming, but after a little while you relaxed and gave in completely.
Without breaking the kiss, Subin brought his hand to your shoulder and gently pushed you down onto your back while he lay next to you on his side, supporting himself on his elbow. He moved his free hand from your shoulder to your face and softly stroked your cheek with his thumb.
The grass beneath you tickled the back of your neck, giving you little goosebumps on your neck and butterflies in your stomach. You brought your hands to Subin's neck, stroking your fingers through his hair and soon you noticed that this gave him goosebumps as well.
After some time, Subin slowly pulled his lips away from yours and continued to stroke your cheek while he looked into your eyes. You both had the same loving smile on your face as you looked at each other like this. Then he lay down on his back as well and you rolled onto your side to look at him. "Maybe I'll have the chocolate flavor next time," you grinned.
Summary: Everyone has certain needs, but in his world of money and lust Hanse surely didn’t need love. Or so he was convinced until he paired up with you.
Warnings: Camboy/camgirl themes, masturbation, Hanse is a little bit mean (in only the best of ways I have problems okay), some teasing sexual and verbal, some manhandling, dom/sub themes, oral (fem receiving), rough sex, fingering, protected sex, some cum play (cum eating), dirty talk, degradation, cursing, sex toys, overstimulation, crying, a little pain, squirting, praise, dirty talk, use of the terms doll and sweetheart, drooling.
Word Count: 5395
Hanse’s brow was raised, continuing to silently sip on his glass of whiskey as he listened to Sejun speak as both a friend and manager. He’d been listening to the man rattle off this plan for the past half hour at this point and frankly he was running out of ways to rephrase his suggestion. It almost pained Hanse to watch at this point...almost, but then again if he was going to suggest what he did Hanse was gonna let him suffer just a little for it. Eventually however, enough was enough, Hanse sighs and puts the glass down.
“You know I like to work alone, Sejun, so why are you asking?” Hanse asks, arms crossing over his chest as he watches nonchalantly as Sejun huffs, arms dropping dramatically to his sides.
“Please Hanse, she needs to catch a break. She’s good, she’s just stuck in the early phase. The one where its only the same old creeps every time. Just help her build a bit of a rep that’s all I ask. She could really use it.” Sejun practically begs and while it wasn’t really Hanse’s thing he couldn’t really say no to his friend like this.
“Send me her profile. I’m not agreeing to anything, but I’ll take a look at her at least.” Hanse concedes at least that much, getting his friend to back off slightly for the time being, “Why are you so invested in her though?”
“She’s my newest client!” Sejun beams, “Well I guess I should say she’s my second client considering before it was just you.”
“What? Did I not pay well enough? Cause if that’s the real issue I can fix that.” Hanse offers still somewhat looking for a way out, to no avail.
“No. No, nothing like that. I just wanted to start branching out some and she seemed like the perfect person. Like I said though she needs help getting out there. Come on Hanse, consider it a favor to me.” Sejun’s comments make Hanse roll his eyes, mumbling something about how he never should have hired his friend.
“Hey I said I’d look at her profile or whatever. Get off my ass and I’ll think about it. I’m not making any promises though.” Hanse tries to wave him off again, but with Sejun it seems as though that’s rather pointless as he thanks the man as if he’d already fully agreed to any and everything.
Still Hanse had agreed to take a look at your profile and so he would. At the very least he might be able to lend you some advice through his friend and perhaps be enough to end Sejun’s begging even if he didn’t quite agree. Sejun had sent the link, all he had to do now was click around the familiar website to take in all the various aspects of your profile while savoring his whiskey as he did any night off...and a few on.
He had to hand it to you, for someone so new your profile was very well put together. Though perhaps Sejun had helped you with that as well. Between saying and showing just enough to tease to interacting with the right amount, and even scheduling things when you should expect a decent amount of traction your profile looked good. Which did peak the man’s curiosity...why weren’t you getting more attention? Scrolling through posts he weeded through pictures of lingerie, toys, aesthetic images, and even kinky texts to find an image of your body. Sucking a breath in through his teeth as he brought his glass up again, throat suddenly running dry. You were gorgeous, breathtaking even, so there was no reason in hell or on earth itself you shouldn’t be drowning in followers or even notice. Yet, he hadn’t heard or seen you anywhere. Which only left him one last thing to check, a stream. He pulled up a recording of a past stream of yours to see if perhaps there was something about being on camera that you couldn’t nail down, only to find nothing yet again. Falling back in his chair with a huff, noticing that he had started to grow hard even. Something that he often had much more control over by this point, that fact speaking volumes about you. He was stumped though, not knowing what advice to give his friend. Hanse pulls his phone out with a sigh knowing he might just regret this, but pulls up his friend’s name anyway to send him a text.
Hanse: Go ahead and send her my profile. Shoot the idea by her. If she’s down then we’ll MEET. This whole thing is going to be on my terms though and my terms only.
Sejun: Of course! I already talked to her about connecting her to someone though, she seems down, but I’ll send your profile her way.
Hanse shakes his head deciding to go distract himself from the possible regrettable decision he just made before he could overthink it too much. Meanwhile you were getting a late night email from Sejun, your newest helper and manager. Noticing how he talks up his friend and client Hanse, including his profile and the potential to work together soon even. Sure you had been onboard with Sejun’s suggestion, trusting him completely on that. Yet now you suddenly felt nervous over the fact there was a potential option for that. Still, you decided to open the link and take a look for yourself.
Your first thought is shock, more in the sense that his presence seems to be the polar opposite of yours. Not that that necessarily means anything, being on cam is about putting on a show whether it’s truly you or not. Still the man was breathtaking and looked like trouble compared to your more sweet, innocent image. When Sejun had suggested it you expected another person with a soft image, not that you were complaining by any means. No, in fact, maybe you should thank him for this. Perhaps mixing some trouble in was exactly what you needed. At the very least it could get you some attention. Though this man’s screaming presence of danger was doing anything but scare you off, only enticing you more.
Y/N: Sejun, set up the meeting. You have my schedule and all. Just don’t let me meet me alone in a back alley or something creepy. Cause I might actually agree to do some questionable shit in the presence of that man.
Sejun: I told you! See I know what you like better than you even do! You can trust me though, I wouldn’t suggest him if I thought you’d be in any real danger. Though I will warn, he might be a little...mean.
Y/N: Mean can be hot... if it’s in the right way. Either way I’ll meet with him and if it’s not something I can handle then we’ll call it off. I trust you though. 😊
You hadn’t lied to Sejun about your trust in him. Still, the way butterflies were going every which way in your gut right now over just the thoughts of what this man might be like had you nervous. As if you were fawning over your first high school crush and scared to lose your virginity to him or something, utterly ridiculous kind of nervous. Especially for a camgirl. This was a business meeting goddamn it, between two working and professional adults. Very attractive adults mind you, but that shouldn’t be enough to have you restless through the night. Logical reasoning didn’t seem to win out this time though and so your eyes drifted over to your bedside table, pulling out a vibrator and finding the perfect video off that profile to pair with it. Even if you and him didn’t enter a business relationship, you were quite thoroughly fucked, this man would be your new addiction. Especially if you slept this well after getting off to his videos was more than just a one time thing.
Sejun wasted no time in coordinating arrangements between you two, making a group chat to send out date, time, and location. Letting you both finally get each other’s name. Though your heart stopped for a moment when Hanse got adamant in the group chat that he would meet you alone without Sejun’s pushy personality there to be any sort of outside influence. Instead that you’d both fill him in once you had met and talked one on one. You still trusted that Sejun wouldn’t put you in danger and that if anything did happen he would come running at the simplest of texts, but that didn’t mean you weren’t anxious over the thought of meeting Hanse like this.
Stepping into the hotel you and Hanse were planning to meet in you knew there was no going back now. Picking up your key from the front desk and making your way up to the room, opening it to silence and so you had to will your voice into working and speak up. Not that it entirely kept the nervous tremble out of it.
“Hello? Hanse, are you here?” You question as you shut the door behind you and glance around as you start to step in.
“I am. Just getting comfortable. Don’t be shy.” Hanse calls from deep inside the room, giving you a direction to go towards only to stop in your tracks when you actually see him.
Hanse was lounging back on the couch in the room, letting the setting sun cast in through the window and over his bare skin. Chest and legs bare and tattoos on display with simply a blanket haphazardly thrown over his lap. A glass of whiskey in hand as he raises a brow at your stunned form, snickering around the rim of the glass as he brings it up for another sip before holding it up in gesture.
“Would you like a glass? You seem... tense.” He offers picking up on your body language rather easily and trying to ease you into this setting. Even if he wasn’t necessarily all that interested in having anything to do with you he had no intentions of being cruel.
“Slightly... more so stunned than otherwise. A glass might help though, you’re right.” You agree with a small nod, watching as the man languidly begins to move again. Gasping softly, yet not enough to go unheard it seemed, when he stands and the blanket falls to show that he had nothing on at all.
“Stunned? And why is that?” The shit eating grin on Hanse’s face showed he wasn’t entirely clueless to the reason why, but his ego wanted to hear you say it. Watching closely as he poured you a glass wondering if he was going to scare you away like this.
“I didn’t quite expect you to be so...forward.” You admit, feeling as if your skin was burning as you reached out to take the glass from him. As hot as you felt in this moment however, you weren’t going anywhere, not until you saw this through.
“I assumed you did your research and so there would be no reason to hide anything. So why not be fully comfortable?” Hanse shrugs as he takes his seat again, not bothering to put the blanket back over himself this time however, “Besides, I’m a very blunt, forward person. Is that going to be a problem?”
You shake your head, taking a gulp of the whiskey and letting it burn down your throat and hopefully kick in as you will yourself to go sit on the couch along with him, just at a bit of a distance still.
“It’s not. Blunt can be good, you know where you stand. I like that. Besides I had no idea at all what to expect, so I probably would have been shocked no matter what.” You out yourself slightly, causing Hanse to chuckle. He had to admit though you were handling all of this better than he expected.
“Well I had some time to settle and get comfortable. I’ll let you have the same. You tell me when you’re ready and then we’ll talk business.” He extends the courtesy to you, watching as you remove your jacket and shoes, moving to somewhat mirror his stance and lay back a little bit.
“I’m fine, we can go ahead and talk now.” You assure him, hearing how he hums the glass and finding that even that is attractive. Even if now is not the time to be getting turned on, not that he was helping that with his appearance currently. You were proud of how well you had done focusing on his face however.
“So I know what Sejun had said, but the reason I wanted to get you alone was to ask you what you’re really expecting from this if we were to work together? Don’t bullshit me either, I’ll know.” Hanse watches you closely as you sip the drink before leaning your head against the back of the couch.
“Because I’m tired of seemingly wasting my time. I’m not miserable camming, but like doing anything long enough without really being appreciated takes a toll. Especially when the whole point it to be noticed.” You respond with a shrug, “I’m not a quitter don’t get me wrong, but it was starting to get to me. So if I’m going to keep doing this then I need to do it right. That’s what I want to get from this. Maybe neither of us ever shows in the other’s videos, but if you can just help me with advice or anything so I know I’m actually doing this shit right...then that’s what I want.”
“You’re not just here to make money getting your back blown?” He can’t help but to tease watching you almost choke in shock at his question, despite picking up on how genuine you seemed to be, “Seriously though, advice or assistance I can do easily. Perhaps even a collaboration, I’d just like to make sure you and I are on the same page though.”
“Of course. I’m fine with that too. I just know that just because someone shows it all off on the internet doesn’t mean they wanna fuck someone they don’t really know.” You take a turn at speaking bluntly now causing Hanse to raise a brow before setting down his glass as he finishes his drink.
“I mean I’m a rather sexual person and I figured I wasn’t the only one with needs so why not make some money off it. After all... I’m not exactly shy.” He snickers holding his hand out to take your glass as well when he notices you’re finished.
“Don’t we all. I do wonder though...and if this is too personal feel free to pass up an answer, I just don’t know anyone else who cams to ask. Does it ever get lonely? I mean I’ve been single a long time and this covers those needs, but I can’t image its an easy thing for someone to accept when you start dating them.” Your question catches Hanse off guard for a moment, looking over you for a moment as if to gauge if you had hidden reasons for asking.
When he doesn’t pick up on anything he decides to humor you with an answer after the honesty you’ve given him so far, “No. Well not to me anyways. I’m not for all that mushy, gushy, love shit. I gave it a try and learned that it’s a lie. A way for people to manipulate and take advantage of each other and I refuse to be naïve enough to believe in it anymore. I find other ways to care for my needs and between that and having friends my life is complete.”
Hanse sighs, noticing your stunned expression again, the way you blink over at him wide eyed in response. Your face falls slightly, almost becoming a puppy dog face and he shakes his head slightly not waiting for you to speak up again before he does.
“Don’t tell me you believe in that fairytale love story shit. Why would you need any of that crap?” Hanse crosses his arms watching your expression fall further, almost feeling perhaps he had been a little too harsh with his words when it seems as if you might cry.
“I mean I don’t need it. I don’t have it now and I’m living life just fine and happy... that doesn’t stop me from wanting it though. If that’s not for you then fine, live like that. It’s not for me though.” You speak softly, enough so that Hanse realizes he did overstep slightly, but not enough to make you cry.
“Fair enough.” He backs down, not sure why he cares if your feelings were to be hurt by his view, but finding that he does, “Would you like to talk about anything else? Or should I go ahead and update Sejun? I’ll show you the email before I send it so you can confirm.”
“That’s fine. If we think of anything else we can shoot a text or meet up again.” You agree, Hanse picking up on how you still seem to shrink back some now that you’ve grown quiet in response yet letting it be. Who was he to care anyways? He didn’t know you that well. Besides, it was probably just a physical response to finding you attractive and not his problem.
Hanse drafting up an email to Sejun outlining what the two of you had briefly talked about in terms of an agreement, handing you the laptop after to allow you to look over it and make adjustments as you saw fit before he sent it off. Allowing a moment of silence to settle for a moment before deciding to take a chance, wanting to test something out and see if that was just a physical response.
“You know... the room is booked for the whole night so we might as well make use of it don’t you think?” Hanse’s inquiry makes you pause, staring at him for a moment to see if maybe you were understanding incorrectly or not.
“And just what are you implying Hanse?” You raise a brow at him causing him to lean into your space with a deep chuckle.
“What do you think? After all, I said I was a sexual person. Plus we both agreed we’re not opposed to working together like that and we’re attractive, so why not consider this a chance for a test run?” Hanse plops down on the edge of the bed now, leaning back onto his palms as he watches your reaction.
Your actions contradicting as you shake your head, but move close to him, “I can’t believe I’m about to agree to this when you just fucking insulted me the way you did.”
“What? You want me to make it up to you now?” He can’t help but be smug as he looks up at you when you step between his legs, “Give me ten minutes and I bet you won’t even remember your name, let alone anything you’d have to be mad at me over.”
“Oh is that so? And what if I said I don’t believe you? You might know how to cam, but that doesn’t mean you know how to fuck. Who says you even know your way around a woman?” You seem to strike a nerve, which may have slightly been the point so as to get him back a little bit for his earlier attack towards you.
Hanse growls under his breath, though whether it was a remark towards you or simply a sound of irritation you couldn’t decipher as he instantly reaches to pull your top off. Fully intending to follow through on the light hearted promise he made more just messing around, but now a matter of pride due to your challenge. Your pants are quick to follow, it crosses your mind for a fraction of a second that perhaps Hanse had some intention of this all along seeing as how he had been naked from the start. Not that the man in question leaves you anytime to ponder over that. Hanse stands while his hands grip at your hips, quickly swapping your positions so that you’re on the bed with him standing now. Shoving you back onto the bed a tad harsh, a bit from irritation as his pride acts up, but also due to knowing that as you fall back no harm will come with the bed behind you.
Hanse’s hands moving down from your hips to your legs, fingertips just barely grazing over the flesh before firmly gripping your knees. He spreads your legs, eyes focusing in on your clothed cunt. Getting down on his knees he leans in closer, hands pressing up your inner thighs and spreading you out as much as he could, not wanting to leave you any room to move away as he places a kiss to your panties. Pressing his tongue flat against your entrance letting it sit there as saliva pools and mixes with your arousal to form a wet patch rather quickly. Hanse moves to slowly drag his tongue up then only stopping again once he gets to your clit, letting the fabric grow damp before wrapping his lips around your clit and sucking, the sensation overwhelming you for a minute. You’re suddenly very grateful that he had taken a second before doing that as even the wet fabric rubbed against your clit slightly rough. Not that you thought you should expect anything different from the little you did know about Hanse. His tongue pressing against the bud while it’s still trapped in his mouth, putting more pressure before swirling around it for a minute. Pulling away with a pop as he looks up at you moving one hand away from your thigh and holding it out to you.
“Give me your hand.” He requests leaning his head against your thigh as he waits for you to listen. You raise a brow not sure what he was wanted, but reaching out anyways letting him guide your hand between your legs, having you pull your panties aside. “Stay just like that. Out of my way.”
Without waiting another second his mouth is on you again, tongue teasing your entrance before curling in as he watches your reactions. He presses closer with each movement, his nose brushing against your clit and when it makes you cry out, fingers tightening around your panties to not reach out and tug at your hair he grins against you. Deciding that while he was planning on breaking you down as quickly as possible he could tease just a hair when he noticed what you liked, making sure you knew just how good he could treat you. Pressing into you a little firmer before shaking his head and moaning against you when you tense up as a result.
“Cum on my tongue sweetheart, you know you want to. Don’t worry, I won’t stop not until you’re shaking.” Hanse’s voice is almost gentle in comparison to his actions as he mumbles them against your core, the vibrations from each word spoken deeply causing a sharp spike of pleasure to shoot up your spine. Arching for him in effect, free hand reaching up by your head to grip at the sheets as your moans increase in volume.
Part of you hated giving in so easily to him, but you were so ill-prepared for how good he’d actually be that you were helpless to the pleasure he drowned you in now. Hanse knew just how to pull the string tight and make it snap so quickly it seemed as if he didn’t even have to try. Pulling back once you cum, just enough to stand though. He pushes away the hand gripping your panties replacing it with his and forcefully pulling them down your legs before taking his place between them again. His grin shit eating as he looks down into your glazed over eyes.
“Look at how pliant you are for me. Talking all this shit just to be a good girl the second someone touches your slutty little cunt, huh?” He toys with you licking over his middle two fingers before slipping them down and into your cunt with one smooth motion. When he curls them just right to make you arch again, withering in sensitivity his other hand slips under your back to unclasp your bra. “And you thought I wouldn’t know how to treat a woman. Are you eating your words now baby?”
“F-Fuck you Hanse!” You grit out between clenched teeth, he knows it’s not from anger however, but instead you trying to hold back your sounds.
“Oh you will sweetheart, when I feel like it though.” Hanse chuckles, fingers pulling out and teasingly pinching at your clit before he walks away to go get a condom from the bedside table, tossing a wand vibrator besides you as well making you gasp.
“You fucker! You fucking planned this didn’t you?” Your tone is breathy, eyes widening at him in disbelief as he simply shrugs, rolling the condom on.
“I wouldn’t say planned, but I wanted to be hopefully prepared in case it were to.” He admits, thumb moving to rub your clit and line himself up. He hesitates, however, due to the way his heart stutters looking into your eyes when they glaze over with lust and pleasure again. Not sure why his chest suddenly felt tighter than his pants would have in this situation, yet he almost felt panicked at the thought of looking into your eyes right now. So he wouldn’t, playing it off instead as he flips you over onto your stomach, feet hitting the floor as you bend over the edge of the bed.
He teases his tip through your folds as he leans over you, reaching for the vibrator he had tossed besides you earlier, clicking it on and placing it into your hand before guiding that to your clit as he slowly pushes in inch by delicious fucking inch, “I’m going to fucking break you doll. Fuck you so good you’ll be begging me to do shows with you ever night from now on.”
You were already falling apart beneath him before he even moved, Hanse’s free hand gripping at your hair and pressing your face further into the sheets when you moan out so loud that they might be hearing from the hotel for noise. Not that he cared much, but perhaps you had dignity to spare. The thought making him question his motives yet again, after all, why the fuck did he care?
“Please.” Your choked out sob caught his attention, leaning down to catch a glimpse of the tears glittering in your eyes and he swore he almost busted right then despite the amount of control he’d built over the last few years.
“This doesn’t work like that doll. You gotta speak up, tell me what you want sweetheart. Be good enough and maybe, just maybe, I’ll be nice and actually give it to you before I get what I want.” He mocked as if you didn’t both want the same thing in this moment.
“Please move Hanse. Fuck! Please, I’m begging. I want you to fuck me so hard I can’t barely walk out this room. Fuck me so well my body commits it to memory.” Your tone of voice along with the way your hips wiggle just slightly convinces him enough, and while typically he’d be the type to punish someone for this you were being too good right now for him to care. No, he’d have all the time to mold you into his perfect little submissive on camera later. For now this was enough for him.
His hips started moving quick and hard, drilling your hips into the bed with each thrust. Hitting deep enough that just the slightly twinge of pain sounded in through the ringing pleasure, something you found yourself loving though. Each roll of his hips making your free hand claw at the sheets as you felt a high rush towards you quicker than you thought was possible to stop even if everything else did in this moment. Hanse noticed too, feeling you getting impossibly tighter around him.
“Let go doll, but don’t move the toy away. You’re going to give me one more before we’re done, like the good girl you are for me now.” His tone softens with you, seeing the way you seem to shatter beneath him, leaning down to kiss your temple, something he never did. The action seemed to be what set you right off though, Hanse praising you through it, “There you go. You’re so perfect when you cum on my cock for me. Give me one more doll.”
Hanse reaches down to slip his fingers between yours when he notices you clawing at the sheet again, gripping onto your hand tightly while his face stays close to yours watching how you’re drooling now. His free hand sliding over yours on the vibrator again, noticing how it trembles along with your thighs and wanting to make sure you’re soaking up every ounce of possible pleasure right to the very end.
“Come on sweetheart, cum for me again. I’m about to cum too, but you first.” He watches you nod blindly, cumming around him with a gush of wetness squirting around his cock and he pulls out leaving the vibrator there until he’s drained every drop from you. He’s quick to toss it away so as not to hurt you, not knowing your limits quite yet. His condom goes next, pumping his cock a few times before he’s cumming hot ribbons across your back and ass making you twitch at the sudden feeling.
Hanse shudders at the sight before pulling it together again, well mostly. He can’t help but lean down though, tongue licking over your form and scooping up his cum. He gently cradles your neck, guiding you into a kiss in your dazed state, kissing you deeply to share his cum with you. Feeling pride swell in his chest for some reason when you swallow.
“There’s a good girl. Stay here and take deep breaths. I’ll be right back.” Hanse assures you taking note of your whiny nature and going to get a warm washcloth along with a water bottle. Coming back to look over you, while he wasn’t emotional he wasn’t heartless especially not with someone who submitted to him. Taking note of how it seemed you had subbed out a bit at this point and using cleaning you with a few scattered kisses as a way of assessing how far you had dropped and helping start to ease you back.
Hanse wraps a good blanket around you before carrying you to the couch, giving you the water and bringing the snack box from the other side of the room so you could get what you wanted while he changed most the ruined sheets with the spares he had requested due to “getting cold”, as if it wasn’t going to be obvious what you both were up to. Carrying you back to bed and tucking you in before getting under the covers with you, watching you snuggle into his side and blinking owlishly.
“Hey...you with me?” Hanse questions softly, running his fingers through your hair and gently working out some knots from earlier. “What’s your name sweetheart?”
You take a moment to respond before humming softly, “Y/N.”
“Good job, and do you know where you are right now?” He pushed a little further, not wanting you to sleep until he was sure how you were doing.
“Yeah... hotel with you, getting the best dick of my life.” You mumble against his side causing him to chuckle as his grin returns.
“Perfect. Get some sleep now, you did amazing doll.” He watches as you almost immediately pass out realizing that didn’t give him any of the answers he was hoping for. In fact, if anything he seemed to have even more questions now.
One thing seemed for certain however, if he stuck around you he would be well and truly fucked. If you were going to fuck him up though...then he sure as hell would return the favor.
a/n: inspired by bloo’s drama ; wrote this blasting it on repeat at four in the morning, so i’d recommend listening to it as you read and look up lyrics afterwards or beforehand. ♥︎
general taglist: @jwnghyuns @eaudenana @soobin-chois
as midnight closed in close, you could’ve sworn the glittering moon’s stardust fell into his hair as he drove. the occasional glances down at him as you stood up in the passenger seat, the upper half of your body sticking out of the rooftop of the aging car he insisted on buying because he supposedly fell in love with it at first sight. chipped maroon paint flakes fell into your palm whenever you grazed it ever so slightly, but as long as it made him happy you refused to argue about the purchase. regardless, it was his money and his decision. plus, the rooftop was a bit of an eye opener towards beginning to like the vehicle. hence why you finally agreed to a late night drive with your boyfriend.
“if i get in trouble for sneaking out tonight, im blaming you!” you tease aloud, sinking back down into your seat as your eyes never left his side profile.
the laughter that left his lips made you smile, your heart flipping at the sight of his dimples popping out for you. “blame yourself for agreeing!” as he stopped at a red light, he took his chance to turn to analyze your features; something he genuinely enjoyed doing.
he brought his hand up to cup your right cheek, smiling at your loving facial expression as his calloused thumb rubbed tiny circles into the apple of your cheek. the sight of his tattoos peeking out from under his black and white knitted sweater made your heart beat faster, always falling in love with the art pieces that scattered across his body. looking back to focus on his face, you notice his eyes focusing on your slightly parted lips. taking the opportunity, you leaned forward and brought his lips against yours without hesitation. it was deep, sensational even. both moving in sync, his hand still cupping your cheek as your one hand laid on his chest as you both sat in the car. you were about to request access with your tongue when the beep of a horny brought you both out of your little moment, some yelling followed suit from the car behind you both.
laughter from both of you escaped your mouths, hanse automatically driving off as he realized the roads were clear to do so. as you turn your head to look out the window, your cheeks heat up in slight embarrassment. sure, they probably couldn’t see in through the newly tinted windows but that doesn’t mean you can’t help but feel the tiniest bit of embarrassment. your boyfriend just continued with small fits of laughter accompanied by lil peep playing on the old radio in his car, hearing the smile in his voice as he attempted to sing along but failing as he remembered what happened minutes before.
sitting on the hood of his car, the time nearing one thirty in the afternoon, you stuffed a kimchi kimbap into your mouth as hanse drank a cola flavored slushie with a gamja hot dog. sleeping with sirens’ if i’m james dean, you’re audrey hepburn’s acoustic version played on his shitty car speakers in the empty parking lot down the street from his apartment complex, the mood comforting as your thighs touched with his head on your shoulder.
“stay with me tonight.” hanse suggests, his tone flat with a hint of seriousness laced into it.
swallowing the bite of kimbap, you kiss the top of his head as you wrap your arm around his waist to pull him closer into your side. “why? are you not feeling okay?”
he lifts his head to look at you, adjusting his seating position on the hood of his car to properly look at you as he grabs your free hand in his. “i’m fine, i just don’t want tonight to end. it feels, perfect.”
you smile at his remark, nodding in agreement. jumping down from the hood and onto your feet, as your feet land you pull him down gently with you by his hands. although confused, he allows you to do so. watching with a raised curious brow, he laughs as you start to slow dance dramatically with him in the middle of the parking lot as you sing along to the lyrics. if anyone were to see you both in this moment, they would either feel lovesick at the young couple who were madly in love with one another or would be concerned for the two. either way, nothing in this moment matter but you two. all your focus was on hanse and vice versa, the smiles evident and laughter being heard from miles away.
as the song finished, you both stared into each other's eyes for a few seconds. the only light being from the moon itself and the flickering streetlight awaiting to be fixed a few empty spaces down from where you two stood. the stars danced along to the change of song, filling the darkened sky with minuscule speckles.
“why does this feel like some kind of drama.” he admitted, making you laugh before placing your lips on his.
cupping his face in your hands, you smiled into the kiss as his hands found your waist and slivered underneath the hoodie you were wearing. after several minutes, you both pulled away to regulate your breathing. you went to walk back towards the car, about to suggest a nightly cuddle session inside of his apartment down the street until he pulled you back into his arms. letting out a soft chuckle, you put your chin on his chest as you looked up at him.
“let’s stay like this for a bit longer.” he recommends.
you comply, not questioning why but rather enjoying the moment. although green day’s basket case doesn’t really scream romance to you, being in this very moment with hanse was everything you needed. and, once again, vice versa.
genre/cw | suicide attempt, self harm, self hate, crying, blood, hurt comfort, mention of sex, mild language
wc | 1.2k
notes | if you are feeling suicidal, please talk to someone. taking your own life isn’t the answer, I promise you. this story is in no way glorying self hate and self harm, it’s basically only for hurt comfort, which I love writing. please find help, love you!
✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧
Hated. Unloved. Ugly. Unworthy. Useless. Repulsing. Unwanted. These were all accurate descriptions of how Y/n felt. Of course, none of them were true, but some people in her life, especially her ex boyfriend, tricked her into believing the lies.
For two years, after Y/n and Doheung’s breakup, Y/n was in a dark place. And the bigger problem was, she didn’t want to get out of it. But then, in her senior year of high school, she met Hanse. He was a light in her life, and helped her realize the truth. And recently, he had convinced her to move in with him. They loved each other and wouldn't have it any other way. Although, Hanse was an idol, which made their relationship difficult at times, but it was worth it to them.
Y/n sat on her and Hanse's shared bed and wrote down her thoughts, as faint music played from her iPhone and rain drops raced down the window.
Soon enough, VICTON's Stupid O'Clock began to play. And it was a song Hanse wrote for Y/n after their 'first time'. She made him horny like crazy and he had to write about it. Of course ALICE and the members didn't know it was for her. They didn't even know she existed.
Y/n smiled as Hanse's part began to play.
Even if it's not my style
I can accommodate your Fantasy
So I make you crazy
This is my daily
Baby right, you come to me
I could burn myself everyday, Maybe
It will get hotter
When I splash
Till the break of dawn
You're gonna be obsessed
Every night, I'll be you, you'll be me
Then after burning in the dark again
You make me get up
And wake everyone up at the blissful dawn
At the speed determined by instinct
Fill your night with me
Even after hearing the song one thousand times, it still made her feel things.
The next song that played was a piano piece without lyrics. She didn't even know the title of it, but it did have a sad, depressing sound. It caused all of these thoughts and memories to return. She subconsciously began looking for something sharp, but stopped herself.
"What the hell am I doing," she asked herself, looking down at her shaking hands.
Her anxiety began to consume her as she paced back and forth.
"Please come home Hanse, I need you," she whisper cried to herself.
She then fell to her knees and covered her face with her hands, trying to suppress her screams. This wasn't her first anxiety attack. In fact, the last one was a few months ago, and it ended up in her harming herself. From that day on, Hanse watched her like she was an infant. But today he had a meeting. It was important, and he couldn't stay home if he wanted to.
The room felt as if it was darkening to Y/n. And as much as she tried to stop herself, there was always the "What if death is the quickest way out?". She began searching for a sharp thing and remembered that she had put a letter opener in the kitchen drawer. She rushed down the stairs and ignored the sound of a car pulling into the driveway.
Hanse was home.
She dove into the drawer with her hands and her eyes lit up when she found the wooden handle letter opener. She took a deep breath before slicing her wrist, causing a dangerously large amount of blood flow out of it and onto the white tiled kitchen floor. She stared at it with a bittersweet smile before getting dizzy and daunting from blood loss.
Hanse stepped in through the door and was unaware of the situation, as she has fallen behind the kitchen counter, which was out of view from where he stood.
"Baby I'm home!" he announced, excited to see his girlfriend. He waited to be embraced and kissed by her, but she never came. He assumed she was busy with something at the moment.
He walked up the stairs and searched the whole second floor. Not in the bathroom, closet, studio, or bedroom. He then got slightly panicked because her phone was in the bedroom, and she was never far from her phone. Not on purpose.
"Y/n!" he ran down the stairs and into the kitchen when he gasped at the sight before him. "Y/n!"
He ran and knelt down beside her critical state. He shuttered at all of the dark red blood splattered on the floor. He immediately put pressure on her wrist and called emergency services. He then held her close to him and rocked her back and forth as he waited for the ambulance.
"Don't go... Don't go," he cried, tears freely flowing as he kissed her lips. "If you leave, I won't know what to do with my life," he said with a broken voice.
Sirens sounded in the distance.
~~~~~
Hanse paced back and forth in front of the emergency room. He was alerted when there was a door opening and closing in the room she was in.
"Is Y/n okay?" Hanse asked the nurse who was helping the emergency surgeon, hoping for a positive answer.
The nurse smiled at him. "Your girlfriend is a lucky one. She barely survived the massive amount of blood loss, but she will live. You may see her if you'd like," he answered.
"Thank you," he sighed, a huge smile of relief on his face.
"You should be thanking Dr. Min. If it wasn't for her, your girlfriend may have not survived."
Hanse bowed before walking into the room. Everyone left except for a female nurse who was removing an IV from Y/n's arm. She was still sleeping due to the anesthetic she had been given before the surgery.
"I'll leave you two alone," the nurse bowed before exiting the room.
Hanse went to the side of her bed and held her hand tightly, as if she would disappear if he let go. He leaned up and planted a kiss on her cheek and stroked her hair with his other hand.
"Why would you ever want to leave me?"
~~~~~
It had been three days since Y/n had the surgery, she still hadn't awakened. But still, Hanse waited.
Y/n opened her eyes and stretched like she had been asleep for years, but it was only three days. She looked over to see Hanse had fallen asleep while holding her hand.
"Hanse," she cooed, shaking his hand a little.
He opened his eyes and smiled at the sight of her being concious.
"You're awake," he smiled, resting his head on her lap. "Why did you do it?"
"I just wanted the pain to go away Hannie, I'm sorry," she teared up.
"No don't be sorry," he pouted, standing up from his seat to climb into the bed next to her and hug her. "I never should have left you."
"You had to Baby. It's not your fault. And I promise I won't do it again."
"Okay. I'm holding you to that promise," he replied, smiling into her neck. "I love you. Don't ever leave me, okay?"
He simply likes to make sure that you’re alright more than anything else, Hanse wouldn’t exactly like to think of himself as paying attention, more that he just cares and wants to make sure that you’re doing fine.
B ⇴ BICKER
Like any pair of best friends, the two of you definitely have your moments when you bicker, usually when you think that you’re both right. You liked to try and prove to Hanse that he was in the wrong, but he thought that you were wrong too and so he’d try and talk over you, getting louder and louder at each other.
C ⇴ COMFORT
Whenever he’s cheering you up, Hanse will always try his best to be positive and try and find the good in things. He’s never down and gloomy as he worries that it’ll only make you feel worse, instead he’s optimistic in trying to come up with some solutions that will hopefully be able to help you out.
D ⇴ DISAGREEMENTS
If something doesn’t get agreed upon quickly, that’s usually when an argument tends to occur between the two of you. Hanse tends to want you to make your mind up quite a lot, his patience doesn’t always extend for as long as it could. He doesn’t like to be the one to decide, so when he’s waiting for you to decide, he wants you to make up your mind pretty quickly and stop him standing around waiting.
E ⇴ EARLY YEARS
There were plenty of conversations when the two of you first met, you found yourselves talking about a whole world of things which quickly led you to start learning plenty of things about one another. You tried your best to remember the things that you learnt about each other mostly so that you could impress the other person when you were able to recall a piece of information that they had told you.
F ⇴ FAMILY
Hanse’s family treated you incredibly well, mainly because they were constantly hearing good things about you from Hanse and knowing that you were taking care of him. He told them all of the good things that you did for him and all of the funny stories that you had from your friendship which often tickled his family too. Hearing so much left them as huge fans of yours, especially as Hanse was your biggest fan too.
G ⇴ GETTING TOGETHER
Whatever the two of you want to do when you hang out, Hanse will make sure that you do it. He doesn’t care how hectic it is, who might be around, or how careful he’s got to be about his condition, if there’s something that you want to do or somewhere that you want to go, he pulls through every time.
H ⇴ HABITS
The two of you had a habit of knowing exactly when the other person was lying to you, you knew each other far too well for the other to try and convince you that they were feeling alright, or perhaps that they weren’t the one that was responsible for a prank, when you definitely knew otherwise.
I ⇴ INSIDE JOKES
Most of your inside jokes were used as blackmail, you loved trying to get your own way by threatening to share an embarrassing story or too that you had about Hanse. If Hanse wanted to try and embarrass you in front of the boys, you’d only have to mention one of your stories for him to quickly go quiet again.
J ⇴ JEALOUSY
It’s an obvious sign whenever Hanse get jealous that he goes very quiet and observes a lot of what’s going on rather than saying anything and getting involved in conversation. If someone is making him jealous, he’ll watch them closely and wait until he can catch them out by saying something or do something that will send a clear message that they’re not your best friend, and that he is in fact your best friend.
K ⇴ KICKS
Hanse got a kick out of making you cringe, usually using aegyo to try and embarrass you and leave you squirming as you watched him. He knows just like the boys it’s something that you hate to see him doing, and so he uses that against you whenever he can as he knows it’s a guarantee that you’ll react to him.
L ⇴ LOVE
He loved how well the two of you knew each other, which ultimately made being friends together one of the easiest jobs in the world. You knew what each other liked and disliked, how they’d react to things, and how they’d behave in certain situations so the two of you were always prepared. You could probably write books on each other with how well you knew one another, even the finest of details too.
M ⇴ MEETING
The two of you first met when you were working at the coffee shop just beside the company building. There had been a few conversations between you and Hanse when he stopped by, but eventually he decided to ask you for your number and see if you wanted to hang out properly sometime with him.
N ⇴ NONSENSE
He completely let go when he was around you, it was one of Hanse’s favourite things about being around you, how easy it was for him to just relax and go about his day without a single care in the world.
O ⇴ OBSESSION
Hanse was obsessed with how close the two of you were, everyone knew that when you were together you were pretty inseparable, if one of you wasn’t around, it was always asked whereabouts you were.
P ⇴ PRECIOUS MOMENTS
The times that meant the most to Hanse were the times when he could just be himself around you, Hanse loved that he never had to be an idol or follow certain rules when he was around you. Especially when his schedule had been particularly busy, just feeling human around you again was a huge deal to him.
Q ⇴ QUESTIONS
It took a lot for Hanse to ever really ask you outright for help, and so when he did, you knew just how much he meant it and how desperate he was for you to step in and let him rely on you for a little while.
R ⇴ RANDOM FACTS
Together you had planned a tattoo that you wanted to get for your friendship, it was just a case of deciding when you were going to get it. You’d spent many nights together designing the perfect thing that would be representative of your friendship and the various things that you’d done together over the years.
S ⇴ SUPPORT
There was always an extra spring in Hanse’s step on stage whenever he knew that you were in the crowd and watching him, his motivation skyrocketing whenever he saw you there. He loved performing in front of the group’s fans but seeing such a familiar face in the crowd gave him an extra reason to go for it.
T ⇴ TRIPS
Whenever he went out on the road, Hanse loved to try and bring you along with him and the group. He loved being able to take you around the world and have experiences that no one else would be able to give you.
U ⇴ ULTIMATE
There was no one else for Hanse, he knew that he had hit the jackpot being able to be the one to call you his best friend.
V ⇴ VISITS
He stops by your home quite a lot, especially when he’s driving past. Even if all he can say is hello, Hanse enjoys being able to see you in person and see how you are rather than just judging from a text.
W ⇴ WISDOM
One of the things that Hanse tries to do with his advice is be organised so that he can share his thoughts logically with you.
X ⇴ XXXX
Whilst the two of you weren’t massively affectionate with one another, you had your moments when you were feeling clingy and wanting attention, deciding to poke and annoy the other person as much as possible.
Y ⇴ YOU
You were his number one, there was no one that was higher up for him than you.
Z ⇴ ZZZ
Quite often Hanse will stay at your place if you plan on spending the evening together, with Hanse sharing with Subin too it’s a lot easier for you both to get some space and not interrupt any of the others too.
summary: just as the tittle claims, this is how the first night sleeping together with him would be like.
g: fluff, smut. requested!
warnings/side notes: gender neutral reader x hanse. established relationship. handjob, no proper lubrication, cum eating. the nsfw part is under the cut. i've received requests for all of the members in this specific scenario, and I'm actually excited to write them all. for now, i hope y'all enjoy this. ><
your relationship with him wasn't new, in fact you had been a couple for almost a year, but with his chaotic schedule and your own busy life, it was almost impossible for you two to spend time together outside form his studio and the sporadic coffee or tattoo dates.
that time was one of the very few occasions in which you were both free on the same day and so you offered to watch a movie at your place in hopes of helping him to leave behind his stressful week
of course he had been in your apartment before, not as often as you in his dorm but it wasn't an unfamiliar place for him.
soon enough you were both snuggled on your couch, popcorn on your covered lap and his arms securely attached around your frame.
recently he had been particularly excited about this harry potter movie, and even when you knew it was a bad idea (because you always end bickering and debating about which character is better), you didn't regretted your decision of bring it up one bit.
his hands on your waist holding you close to his body and your intertwined legs under the blanket as the movie unfolded in front of you were a bit too much of your liking, you didn't even complained when he argued about slytherin being the best house.
laughs, gasps and scattered kisses were shared for about three hours. it wouldn't ever stop surprising you but it was amazing how he could watch the movie for the nth time and still be amazed by everything.
after it was over he reached for his phone, and the bright screen made you both cringe in your place since the rest of the lights were off and it hurt your eyes momentarily.
hanse looked at you with pensive eyes at seeing the late hour, wondering how on earth would he get home.
you hesitated for a bit, but then
"you can sleep here, you know?"
he bit his lip, deep in thought because he didn't wanted you to feel forced to invite him or anything but he as well didn't want the boys on his back with questions and complains if he appeared in the middle of the night.
"are you sure? i can always call our manager"
"and having seungwoo scolding me on the phone first thing in the morning? no thanks"
you tried to joke to hide your nervousness, hoping he could get the hint and realize that your offering was sincere
he finally nodded, and you both got up
after tidying up and turning off the tv you headed to your room and he followed, suddenly quiet but happy on the inside because it was the very first time you would sleep together
despite the ease with which you moved around each other, it felt like a big step for him
you shyly handed him a large pair of shorts and a purple shirt and he chuckled, thanking your habit of buying oversized clothes that often were a bit too big for you
you entered the bathroom and after washing your face and changing into something more appropriate for sleeping you went out
hanse was laying on your bed, scrolling through his sns feed when you jumped on the bed and hugged him from behind, head on his shoulder blades
you stayed there for a few minutes, trying to ease your mind and calm your racing heart
despite of being in a relationship with him for quite some time now, he hadn't seen your bare face before so you were kinda nervous, not knowing what to expect or how would he react
your boyfriend was the type of boyfriend to remind you all the time how much of a beautiful person he thinks you are, speaking of both your looks and your soul so it wasn't really an insecurity of yours. however, the bubbly feeling on your stomach persisted
by the time he tried to roll on his back to hug your body, you held onto him tighter and mewled against the soft fabric of the shirt
"what is it, baby?"
"I'm not wearing any makeup"
you cringed at how high pitched your voice sounded, and he chuckled before untangling your arms from his waist and sitting on the bed with his back on the headboard
he attracted you to his lap and even when you tried to snuggle on the crook of his neck, he held your chin with the hand that wasn't busy on your hip and stared at your face
"i can tell"
you mouth fell agape, though you weren't offended. yes, he had a smirk plastered on his handsome face, but he was gazing at you in the most loving way, eyeing back and forth from your eyes to your lips, and his touch on you was just as tender as ever
you smacked playfully his shoulder and he broke into a fit of giggles
you were happy and you could tell by the way he couldn't stop smiling that he was happy too
his thumbs caressed your hip bones, and your hands gently stroked his short, black hair. it was a matter of time before he leaned on to peck on your lips, humming at your warmth
"let's go to sleep, you look tired"
he nodded at your words and dragged you with him until you were both under the covers and your head rested on his arm as a pillow
he insisted on being the big spoon, so you let him, easily falling asleep with his other arm around your torso and a goodnight kiss on top of your head.
alternative ending here.
let's say that when you told him "let's go to sleep, you look tired" he nodded, but instead of actually going to sleep he kissed you one more time
he bit on your bottom lip and your lips parted, giving him access to play with your tongues and deepen the kiss
you melted, sharply inhaling when he squeezed your thighs and ass, and just as your own hands reached his shoulders for support, you could feel the tension still latched on his body
it was true that after the wonderful evening you spent together he was far more relaxed than he would like to admit, but he still felt heaviness on his back. you understood his silent plead, and smiled against his lips
kiss after kiss, you tried to massage his shoulders to help him relax, loosing momentarily your balance though he was there to stabilize you
his lips lingered over yours for a few seconds, a choked gasp escaped his throat when you accidentally grinded on his clothed crotch and you murmured a soft "sorry"
you placed yourself on his thighs instead of his hips, playing with the hem his shorts and waited for him to nod before sliding them down his legs and throwing them aside along with his underwear
soothing caresses landed on his soft skin until your fingers finally wrapped themselves around his shaft and he threw his head back. your thumb rubbed his tip before stroking him, slow and gentle in order not to hurt him
you felt him grow hard in your hand with each minute that passed and as your wrist made all the job controlling the speed, your other hand collected the precum that started to spill
because of the position it wasn't possible, but you could see in his expression just how much he wanted to thrust into your hand and you chuckled, taking advantage of his sensitiveness to pump him faster
he was a mess, whimpering and growling under his breath. knowing of how much he loved when you complimented him, you kissed his lips without stopping your hand
"look at you, you look so pretty this way"
he whined, furrowing his eyebrows when your pace haltered before picking up again and adding pressure around the base with your other hand
he wasn't going to last much longer, and as you felt him on the edge, you lowered yourself to face his crotch with and idea to prevent making a mess on your bed
he moaned loudly, eyes shooting open in half of a second when he felt your lips and warm mouth around his length
your tongue around his head was sloppy because you didn't want to tease him too much, just enough to push his limit and make him cum
you sucked, hollowing your cheeks and not long after he came undone on your mouth
length twitching and heavy pants were all you could hear and see when spurts of white filled your mouth
his fucked out expression made you chuckle, and he tried to playfully glare at you through his heavy eyelids but you couldn't care less, standing up to help him dress up again
you rolled on the bed, giggling when his arms engulfed your figure and attracted you to his chest
"are you okay, love?"
you nodded, turning around to face him with a bright smile on your lips
"yeah, why?"
"you know, it was your turn"
"it's okay, we'll see tomorrow"
"but-"
you knew he wanted to return the favor, but you also knew how tired he was so you dismissed his complaints and kissed his jaw, hugging him back
Chan: Babe, & he would give you an oddly specific nickname like If really like cuddling he call you his cuddle bunny.
Sejun: Babe, Kitten, he would 100% walk up behind you and just call you "mine" as he kisses your neck.
Hanse: Doll, prince/ss, I feel like he would call you something like panda or dodo if you act really silly.
ByungChan: Cutie, Sweetie and baby.
Subin: if you're older then most likely hyung/Noona (maybe even mommy) but then we have. Honey, Baby, then pup I really feel like he would say it idk why yall can be watching a movie or show and he see you not looking happy and be like "what's wrong pup" like idk I feel that vibe from him.
