reading a Kingsman fanfic and listening to Breaking Benjamin while high is truely beautiful. Rip giving up smoking to work in real life healthcare is so sad 😭

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reading a Kingsman fanfic and listening to Breaking Benjamin while high is truely beautiful. Rip giving up smoking to work in real life healthcare is so sad 😭
One Christmas Night
There is a particular quality to the ceiling of a room you know well, looked at from this angle, in the small hours of night when thought is too loud and jumbled and something has just happened that you have no adequate framework for. Harry Hart, I think, is becoming acquainted with this quality for the first time.
This is Christmas night. The party is over, leftovers cleared, guests gone, the house released from the noise and considerable effort of festivity. Eggsy has stayed. He always stays when he is in London; Harry's house has become something of a fixed point in a life that has very few of those. There is nothing unusual about this arrangement.
What happens on this particular night is, however, unusual. But it is not something I am going to summarise here. Not out of coyness, but because it belongs to the prose and would be diminished by anything less. It exists so far in fragments and drawings, suffused with the lucidity that descends at two in the morning when you have been sitting with characters long enough that they begin doing things without consulting you first. What I will say is that by the time Harry is lying here, looking at the ceiling with that expression — which is not distress, nor regret, and not quite anything that has a name in the conventional lexicon of human emotion — something has shifted between them that cannot be shifted back. You can probably get a hint of it. Let it be a hint just now.
The moment sets the whole painful architecture of what I have been drawing and writing about for the better part of seven years — or rather, the part of it that concerns Harry and Eggsy specifically, which is the part that has always cost me the most. Two people reaching for each other by entirely different routes, speaking entirely different languages of love, loving each other genuinely, but somehow at cross-purposes. This night is where it begins. Not cleanly, not with declaration or intention, but as a stumble on a largely unknown terrain. Perhaps as the most consequential things tend to begin, in life and in fiction likewise.
This pencil drawing is the first in my new sketchbook, which is an elegant nod to the story’s ultimate beginning. Harry is in his Christmas sweater, which I enjoyed rendering more than anything else in it (even more than oxfords) — him in festive knitwear feels simultaneously absurd and, if you know him at all, entirely right. The feet above him belong to Eggsy who is fast asleep.
Chapters: 1/1 Fandom: Kingsman (Movies) Rating: Mature Relationships: Harry Hart | Galahad/Gary "Eggsy" Unwin Additional Tags: World Travel, Fix-It, Developing Relationship, Returning Home, Pining
Summary:
Armed with his passport and visa-free access to nearly the whole world, Harry packs a bag and leaves London on a one-way ticket in the middle of spring.
In its own way, this too is healing.
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Harry travels the world, and Eggsy follows. Sort of.
Flowers and Butterflies (Moths Too, Uderrated As They Are)
I wish hartwin were all flowers and lepidoptera. But it's more laden than simple affection and mutual respect on a partner and mentor-protégé level. The inner workings of the soul, the needs of another, and the capacity to heed those needs — that is where the seemingly faultless tandem would, and does, come unstuck.
Utter happiness is but a summer butterfly flitting past. Large White, perhaps, since it does seem to be on the wing most of its adult time on Earth.
For me, such moments between Harry and Eggsy are a rarity. No matter how close they get — and one path to knowing one another is to become physically close — there's always an odd crevasse that they can't quite cross. Something about upbringing, certainly, but more so the frequencies with which their hearts beat. I'm not sure whether it can be put into words. They do love each other, but with different loves. They do need each other, but not the way either of them imagines. And this, I think, is the tragedy of this relationship, however flowery and butterflyingly one can paint it.
I'd expound, expand and exposit, but I'm too spent right now. The drawing is a bit old (February 2024), and anyway I wasn't on here then. But I love it very much and rather think you should see it. I also want you to look at it while listening to Stumblin' In by Chris Norman & Suzi Quatro because this song is just SO them.
INCOMING MESSAGE: These diplomatic meetings are such a bore. Missing you terribly. Hope to find you still in bed so I can join you when I get back. Speaking of, shall I pick up some chinese for dinner? Hx
INCOMING MESSAGE WITH A HIDDEN PHOTO: Missing me already? And you said a gentleman should keep his emotions in check 😉 Alright, I miss you too. Hang in there, super-spy.
I haven't left the bed, honestly trying to remember where I tossed my boxers, but without your search-and-rescue team, I'm hopeless.
As for the Chinese food: oh yes, please! I'm starving to death! Get that spicy sesame duck I love, and plenty of spring rolls. But fair warning - that's just the first course. xxx E. 🍑🍆
Hurry up, I've got an emergency situation here that requires your... personal intervention.
[photo evidence attached]
This is niche, but I have this little headcannon for the Kingsman fandom where Eggsy is, unexpectedly, a very good singer; specifically of Elton John songs.
Harry finds this out when he hears Eggsy singing Tiny Dancer and is charmed beyond his comprehension.
You know, like when Elizabeth Bennett plays the piano?
I tripped and fell back into Kingsman (which happens every few years I don't think I'll ever fully claw my way out of this place it's been ten yearssss). Would really love to do a Kingsman plot if anyone's even still active in this fandom T^T
Would love to do Hartwin, but I also love Merlahad and Merwin! 21+, semi-lit, prefer to include smut. Can be plot intensive or a shorter oneshot! I'm happy to play anyone. Message me if you're interested and I'm always happy to discuss and write a starter!
a tender gasp of inevitable ache [E] [ch3/5] → ao3
(Minor) Daddy Kink, Pseudo-Incest, Pining, Undercover Missions, Older Man/Younger Man, Unresolved Romantic Tension, Jealousy
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Undercover operations required seamless cooperation between the agents involved. That’s why, when Harry ambushes Eggsy in plain daylight to snog him like he needs it more than he needs air, Eggsy doesn’t jerk in surprise. But it’s a close call. Because what the actual buggering fuck?