First was the hand on my arm. Second was something vaguely on my back. At least, I thought it was, I turned around, too tired to be fierce about it and thanked my lucky stars I hadn’t been. Looking a little pale and somehow smaller than usual, Buki stood in front of me, with a quilt over her shoulders, her hat missing. It somehow seemed surreal to see her without it.
I took the opportunity to check my back and sure enough, she’d... huh. Some things never changed, huh? I took the charm off and I stared hard at it before I met her eyes.
“I'm still not ghost-free, huh?“
“Not ghosts, Shimizu-dono, but an ominous presence nonetheless. You are very clearly possessed by something. I cannot fathom what made you extend a hand to me, a cursed being. A moment of madness? It is a strange affair. Besides...“
“I fear that your kindness will lead to misfortune. Particularly if you tangle with me. I must ask you take care and keep a good distance.“
To be honest, I was surprised she was out and about. I got the impression Kumatani was the type to fret over someone more and she didn’t look a 100% to me.
“You should go back and rest. You look like shit.”
“W-why I never! I am as upright as a daisy! You would gainsay this?”
I still need a thesaurus when speaking to her. Even when she’s not feeling well. Ahh, my head hurts.
“How come Kumatani let you come out?”
Speaking about him like that made him kinda seem like a mom. I didn’t realize that until the words left my mouth. Buki wrung her hands together as she considered her answer.
“... True. He also bestowed upon me terrible kindness. Such eyes burned right into my flesh! Because it has been me and Panayomogi-sama for so long... I felt threatened! But even if he forgets his manners, I do not. I owe you a debt and this gnawed at me. So, I made a plea to Kumatani-dono. A brief trip is all. He could count the minutes, should he like! But, to Shimizu-dono, I had to go.“
“... You didn’t have to, I mean. I’m not going anywhere.”
I hope I’m not, anyway.
“Perhaps not. But what if the world ended tomorrow? What if, by chance, I said your first name and allowed Panayomogi-sama access into your soul? You would perish! And the chance would pass. Dramatic, I know, but this is why I had to rush to your side.“
So, wait... if she uses my first name I’ll be cursed too? Is that part of the Panayomogi mythos or something? I still don’t get everything about Buki or her weird dark god but... I guess at least certain pieces are coming together? In any case, I should try and bear in mind what I can for the future.
“Well. I’m here. I’m hoping that doesn’t change.“
“I also...”
The words tumbled out of her mouth quickly before she put an end to them with a shake of her head.
“Three souls lost is already too many... but while we remain on this dark ground... I fear for the future. Furthermore, I have brought Panayomogi-sama here. That was careless of me...“
“You say that, but you must’ve lived with people you cared about before. I mean... you can’t just act like this is your fault. You didn’t tell people to kill each other, right?“
“No! No, no, I wouldn’t! Perish the thought!“
“Then it’s fine, right? Trust me, you didn’t make this happen or anything.“
She stands there, silent for a few seconds before whipping out another charm and sticking it directly on my face. I really should begin to see this coming. How many of those does she have, anyway...?
“You truly are very cursed, Shimizu-dono. I implore you to keep that to yourself! You stay for my ceremony and hear me out... you do not turn your head away when I am weak and disgusting... and now this? To ignore Panayomogi-sama but pay me mind... it’s dangerous! It’s a buffoon’s gambit.“
Was I really being that kind to her? I kinda thought my actions were pretty normal. But maybe normal things felt special to people who hadn’t ever had them.
“I’m not cursed, I’m normal. And I’m not afraid of some curse, hell, I have enough things to be worried about without a dark god entering the picture.“
“Which is why! You need to watch your sweet talking!”
“... I’m sorry, sweet talking?”
“You know what it is! I won’t hear it! If I am not careful, I will cost you your life. If you value that, keep your distance. And... and I, too, will try to meditate to calm myself.”
Why was she so sure she’d be responsible for hurting me? Like Mikiro and what he’d said, I had to assume something big had happened to her.
“Look, I know you’re afraid. But getting along just makes sense. If we work together, we’ll get out of this easier.”
“I do not know whether... you can trust me or not. Can you say for sure I’d speed up your plans of escape? There is a very good chance I would hinder them.”
“Because you’re cursed. Right?”
She gives me a slow nod.
“I don’t expect you to take my word for it. So it’s enough if you keep your distance.”
That didn’t strike me as right. Buki hadn’t really done anything wrong yet. Rather than judge people on what I heard, I’d always just judged them on what I saw. And yeah, she was kinda out there but she wasn’t a bad person. No one to avoid, anyway. And if I was tolerating people like Shiratori, there was no reason not to tolerate her, too. Everything about her came from some really dark unknown place. Like... everything about her would just make sense if I knew a little more about her.
“When you collapsed... Kumatani said you were under a lot of stress. At the time I figured he was just being Captain Obvious but... he said, even before all this shit happened, you were under pressure. That’s why your body rejected the food. So is it really okay for you to be out here? I don’t know much about it but... you should probably rest up.“
“...“
She searched her person for something until she found... oh come on, is that another charm? I took on a defensive stance but she didn’t seem to have any intention of hitting me with it.
“Open your hands, Shimizu-dono.”
I kinda felt like I was being pranked but it also kinda felt like a jerk move to just leave a sick girl hanging like that so I did as she requested. She put the charm gently in my hands and then pressed her hands together, as if in prayer.
“That’s a protection charm. Panayomogi-sama targets those close to me. He is able to infect people with his darkness should I allow him to. If I break my rules. Those people will be driven mad by misfortune. I cannot... protect people from him when he like that. But I can do this much. Your ‘worry’ I believe is routine behaviour... so I understand this is the right thing to do. Normally people give up, though. I worry you will not. This ‘stress’, as you name it, is... mine to bear. And it would not change, whether this happened or not. So put it out of your mind. Worry not, I will recover and... for your discretion, I am grateful.“
She bows her head and then trots back indoors. Her steps seem a little shaky at times but she seems to be fine enough. I looked at the charm she’d given me and decide to pocket it. I’d thrown all the others away, I mean, they were slapped onto me and I was annoyed. But this one felt like more of a gift.
At this time the sun was going down and the whole outside coated in a kinda orange glow. I sat down and took in the sun for a bit.
A low humming made me vaguely aware of where I was. I snapped out of my stupor soon after. The elevator continued a gentle descent. I did, too, sinking from standing to sitting in a few seconds. Everything after the murder seemed inconsequential but I mentally smacked myself for being so lax. If I didn’t focus, everything I’d checked out and everything I’d heard would just become a blur. I took the moment to just ease up; remember what I could, and think on it for a few seconds.
Think... commit to memory and... try and find a solution.
I’d never been the detective type - hell, I’d hardly touched a book but if there was ever a time to start, I figured this’d be it.
So... the structure of this building... was more complicated than I thought. That’s the initial take away, I guess. It was like two buildings combined into one. I wondered if there was a name for that. The whole thing was a part of the same structure. I’d seen it from the outside, after all. But I didn’t realize parts would connect like this.
The elevator that took us down to that trial room also took us down to some other floor. A little higher than the trial room, I think. And that opened up to a corridor that led to the right... to this other structure. Other part of the building. Common theory is that this is where we did a bunch of work. Outside of the classroom, I guess. Since it was designed as a free school, I suppose whenever anyone wanted to train in the arts or get some exercise they came over here.
Let’s see...
The clinic was one of the first places I checked. Pretty standard, but if Kumatani’s warning’s anything to go by, there’s some stuff in there that shouldn’t be messed with. Maybe he’s being cautious - doesn’t want people mixing the wrong stuff together. Or maybe it’s something more obvious, like poison or something. Either way, I might check it out later. He expressly doesn’t want me to and... it kinda sucks to potentially disappoint him. I mean, I’m not a fan of how, like... adult he is, sometimes. Like he’s better than us and more mature or something. But he’s not a bad person and he’s helped a lot, too. It’s a weird thing, I guess.
We’ll see.
The swimming pool and gym seemed kinda standard although there were some rooms and cupboards I didn’t check out. Tiny things, really, but hey, maybe there’d be something of note there. Something I missed. Every time I consider I’ve missed something I feel sick to my stomach. Like, if I miss even just a little thing, maybe it’ll cost me big time. It’s not like me to be so paranoid. I guess I’m used to worrying but the consequences just... didn’t matter at the time. So it was just easy to move on with it.
But this isn’t normal. And I have to keep telling myself it’s real. If I forget what happened or blank on details, it might cost me my life.
Details... yeah, what else was there?
Sound-proofed rooms... if I’m right, two of them. The music room was definitely sound-proofed. And given the racket Chiffon made and the lack of reaction we got... I think... the AV Room’s probably also soundproof. Just like the rooms we stay at. Maybe it’s a good idea to peek inside those rooms every now and again, just to be sure. The idea of someone screaming and no one hearing... that kinda freaks me out.
Speaking of the AV Room... there was a lot to process there, huh.
Shiratori’s apparently gonna keep an eye on us all. It’s a stupid, stupid, bad idea but that’s nothing new for him. I’m hoping someone that isn’t me provides a better argument than I would. But it’s a really bad move. Nobody likes feeling like they’re being watched all the time. Nobody likes that, but... they especially don’t like it if they know it’s happening.
My eyes move across the elevator as it dings and I pass through the corridor. I keep searching for those cameras. I wonder if I’m looking right into the eyes of someone else far away when I see one. The grand hall feels grander when I step into it - probably because no one else is there. I remember Patchnuki falling down and... all of those voices back then. It’d been a few days ago, but somehow the way I was remembering it, felt like a lifetime ago.
Sure enough, I think there were cameras. They were just hard to see. Kasahara’s theory was that... we were being watched, even now, by those cameras. Because there were cameras in that very AV Room. If I analyzed it, I think... without all the murder and all that... maybe that made sense. Because, the students were supposed to be using a bunch of these rooms, right? Still, why were all these computers and monitors in the AV Room? Were students supposed to be using those?
I felt the more I thought about it, the more my brain hurt. I just couldn’t figure it out.
‘There wasn’t just one mastermind’. I ran those words through my head. The first motive had provided us clues. That meant we were being toyed with, for whatever reason. Rather than being pissed about it, I was more pissed at myself for not being able to figure it out. And Anzai’s clue matched with mine. Not only were multiple people in on this, they were among us. That meant you could throw out a common enemy.
There was a lot to chew on and a lot I still didn’t understand. Chiffon had brought more questions than answers. We still didn’t even know where she came from. Maybe she was just being dumb about it, but I kinda believed her - that she really couldn’t find the place she woke up. It made me think about our memory loss, too. If... we did somehow contribute to this... mastermind this as a group... did we even remember doing that?
We’d probablt lost months of our lives here. Maybe even years. I had no way of knowing. I found myself mulling over Yuunagi’s words, too. Is it possible we’d lost little moment of happiness?
Was there a time when we were all happier and better off as people?
Even Hanji? Wakatsuki?
Something buzzed in my brain. A face. Daisy’s? ... I wasn’t sure. I was tired and my leg hurt and honestly I was done with the day. I wasn’t sure how many hours had passed even in this day. I should watch out for that, I guess. Time is... more important than I thought. If I’ve already lost a whole bunch of time, I should make sure the time I have now counts. Maybe I’ll alllow myself to think a bunch today. That’s fine. I’ll just make sure I bounce back and do something worthwhile tomorrow. That’s a fair trade-off... should be, anyway.
Rather than hang around in the house, I thought I’d get some fresh air and I pushed the doors open. It was funny; you could go outside like this but you sill felt trapped. But the fresh air did help. I passed look over to the bunker we all woke up in. Right before I woke up, I thought I remembered Hanji pushing me... given what he said, maybe I hadn’t just dreamed that. Well. I’d thought enough for one day. I opted to just enjoy what I could of the day so I could prepare for tomorrow.
Something disturbed that, though, or someone... someone who grabbed my arm. They must’ve been real quiet, I almost didn’t notice them.
The door shut with a snap when Chiffon left but as soon as I followed her out I didn’t detect any real grumpiness. Well, I mean, nothing out of the ordinary, anyway. It was weird to consider that: ordinary.
There was nothing ordinary about Chiffon, really. Her appearance, her memory loss... hell, even her actions were a little out there. But the way she spoke, it was pretty... direct. And simple. That made figuring her out a little easier, at least. I thought so, anyway.
Still, she had to reign it in at least a little. There was direct and then there was just asshole. It was a fine line I had to try and walk myself.
“What’s with you, mouthing off like that?“
Chiffon didn’t even look my way but she didn’t seem upset; just... pensive, I guess. Being ignored still irks me, though.
“Hey. Don’t blank me.”
She pauses, takes a deep breath and...
Let out a huge scream. No, more of a shout. But more than that, what the hell?! Just when I thought she was easy to figure out she pulled something like this. I was too surprised to really react until she was finished.
“What the... HELL... is your problem?”
I was wincing plenty at her racket but I really shriveled at the thought of that AV Room door snapping open and either seeing an enraged Kasahara or Shiratori. To my surprise, that door never opened, though. I definitely thought I heard something from the Arts Room though. Poor Nagase probably never saw that coming.
Chiffon just stared at me, as if that never even happened, meeting my eyes with a calm I wouldn’t expect. I mean, I probably looked pretty furious right now.
“I wanted...”
“To hear my voice echo.”
I was completely at a loss.
“Are you serious? Is this seriously happening?”
“That’s what I want to know! I have to do these things, you know. I need proof that I’m here! And that you’re not all just robots sent here to terrorize the last human or something.”
I heard a door from way down the hall open; given the rooms available, I was guessing it was the clinic. No need to pay it too much attention.
“If you’re the last human, maybe we’re better off with the drones.“
“Sounds exactly like what a robot would say...”
A loud cough interrupted us and I cast my eyes to the approaching figure of Kumatani. Ah, well... yeah. Okay, it made sense the clinic wasn’t soundproofed and this little idiot had just screamed her head off. He gave us both disapproving looks; you could feel the scolding before any words even exited his mouth.
“Look, I’m all for people taking their minds off of things, but... please be a little more mindful about what you do and where. What if someone thought the worst? You could give someone a heart attack. That’s no joke.“
“Mindful of what? It’s not a library.”
The poor guy looks like he’s really trying to phrase this delicately.
“Yes, well... there’s been a recent incident and people are on edge. Furthermore, I have a patient. So, please.”
“... Incident... huh?“
“You mean the murder. You don’t need to worry about that. If anyone here wants to kill anyone else, it won’t be because I shouted.”
The heaviest sigh I’ve probably ever heard exits Kumatani’s mouth ahd he smothers his stressed face in a hand.
“Can I count on you to handle this, Shimizu-kun? I can’t leave the room unattended for too long.“
“Oh. Uh, yeah, sure.”
He gives me a nod and then trudges back. I hadn’t paid it much attention before but he looked really tired. Everything had just happened all at once and now on top of that he was looking after someone. Yeah, I guess... that wasn’t easy.
“What’s he mean ‘handle this’? Like I’m a parcel.“
“Nah, you’re decidedly worse than a parcel. Last time I checked, those don’t just break out into screamo arias when they feel like it.“
“An aria, you say...“
She’s stroking her chin and suddenly I know exactly where this is going.
“Don’t! No! No opera crap in the damn passage, geez. Are you crazy?”
“I don’t know! Am I? I mean, shouldn’t I have woken up already if this a dream? I don’t think dreams are supposed to last this long but... there are those stories of people who visualize a whole life and then wake up so...“
Despite her words, I’m not sure Chiffon’s doubting this is really happening. I guess, in a way... in her way, she’s blowing off steam. Complaining and trying to find a reason for this. Unfortunately, I didn’t have that reason for her; not sure any of us did.
“If you were really dreaming you would’ve woken up by now. How many times have I yanked your face now? ... Want me to try it again?“
“Bully! Go away!”
She scuttles away and strikes a pose as if she’s hiding herself. Hopefully she knows she’s in plain view.
“I know it’s reality, stupid! But it’s weird, weird, weird! Amnesia’s not something that’s supposed to happen in REAL life! It’s that quaint thing in fiction! That irritating trope you scoff at when you see it on TV... I remember TV, you know! And walking! I just can’t remember anything about me! It’s an affront!“
“I thought if I walked around with you, something would just click or something... but there’s nothing. Nada, zilcho, nothing!“
“... And you still don’t even know where you were when you woke up, huh?”
“Not that it’d help! If I was going to get some special memory flash it would’ve happened already, right? Like, if I look into your eyes, I should remember your stupid face, right?”
As if to prove her point, she stares at me. Normally I’d just look away but I felt like competing with her and glared her down. Well, glared until she huffed and turned away, anyway.
“But I’m blank. Blank as a piece of paper. It’s clear I’m here for a reason, but I’m... I’m impatient! I can’t wait for the important reveals, I want to know who I am now!“
I was in a weird place of understanding her and not, all at once. She hadn’t been a part of this game at first. That’s how it seemed to me. But now she’d been dropped in and she remembered even less than we did.
Still, I kinda wanted to know where she got all that confidence from. If it were me, I’m not sure I’d think of myself as someone so special.
“This... ‘amnesia’, I guess... who knows how it works? I mean, all of us got it so it’s some artificial thing, right? So who knows what triggers what? Haven’t been thinking about it much but it’s fine enough to just go with the flow for now. I mean, we have bigger things to worry about anyway.“
“I never said it was a big deal! It’s just annoying. I’ll be whoever I was in time anyway so it’s not like it matters.”
She quite literally hand-waves it away.
“But it’s not fair that you’re Kaede and I’m Chi... Shi... Shinigami.”
“Don’t think you have to worry about that one being your name.“
I didn’t really have words of consolation; for her or for anyone else. The more problems hit me, the more tempted I became to shrug them off. But I had to try something. If I let myself ignore these things I had a feeling they’d be back to bite me later.
“It’s only been one day. And there’s been a ton of excitement. Maybe you got distracted. Just wander for a bit and see what that does. I mean, maybe you’ll remember stuff when you’re not trying to, you see? Like... unconscious stuff.“
She stared, and then...
“You want me to knock myself out?”
“No, I do not.”
“Haha! I’m not that stupid, stupid Kaede! I know what you’re saying. It can’t be that great of an idea if I didn’t come up with but I guess it’s worth a try. I mean, if nothing else.“
Chiffon’s become so idiotically pathetic that I’m finding my strength leaving me. She leaves so many openings for so many barbs that I’m just overwhelmed and come away feeling bad for her.
“Yep. You’re a genius. Good for you.“
“Hmhm! It IS good, isn’t it? ... Although... hm... what now...? That’s the whole floor, isn’t it?”
I didn’t need to check my ID; I’d seen it quite a few times now and I could confirm there wasn’t any other rooms to check out.
“Seems like. Unless there’s some hidden door I missed.“
“Ooh, a hidden door! Well. You definitely missed that, but it’s fine. We’ll find it later.”
I don’t have the energy to play along. For a while now some stinging pain’s been giving me grief. I’d been ignoring it up until now but it turns out I hadn’t come out as unscathed as I thought from falling down those basement stairs. Hopefully it was just a temporary bruise or something. It was taking up my attention every now and again, though.
“So... what’s the plan now? I guess there’s enough books and stuff if you like that kinda thing, but...“
It wasn’t really the time or the place. Maybe for her it was different though, who could say?
“I have no idea! But that’s fine. I’m sure I’ll work it out walking around. That’s how you get good ideas, right? By not thinking of them! Be-si-des, I have to find a place to stay...“
“Huh...? Wait, weren’t you staying with Yuunagi?“
“You’re so... you’re so... vulgar! My god! You think I’ll impose for that long? That’s so disgraceful!“
“Unless I missed something, you don’t have a room. Or an ID.”
“Bah! It’s not like it has to have my nameplate! I’ll find some other bed! Or couch! Or... table! I’ll sleep in a coffin before I overstay a welcome!“
“Hey, don’t go around saying something so ominous...“
“A place just for me... I could convert any old room into a glamorous bedroom... aha! Aha-ha! Admit it! The Break Room would be perfect, wouldn’t it? It’s where the important people probably used to take it easy and there are a ton of sofas.“
Shit. God, that’s where they wanna set up their party... anywhere but there. I need to re-direct her attention, but where...? I wasn’t picky about where I slept but that didn’t mean she wasn’t.
Quick... god, I gotta say something!
“That room sucks. I mean. It’s connected to that creepy basement.“
“Aww! Are you being concerned about me? I’m not afraid of ghosts or anything like that. Having such a cute weakness is worthless to me!”
“Who said anything about ghosts? There could be rats down there. They could fight you for scraps and stuff.”
That. Sounded so stupid. I wasn’t going to go the afraid of rats angle but this... this was no real substitute.
“... Hm... I don’t want to waste my energy fighting rats...“
Wait, that worked?
“There’s, uh. There’s a lounge in the other building, y’know. You probably still haven’t checked through it much.”
Ahh! Ahhhgh!
What am I saying? That’s even worse! Someone died there!
“Or... y’know... a library. I thought I saw some sofas there.”
I was sure I’d told good lies before; it was only in this moment I was feeling any semblance of intelligence leak out of a crack in my head. Chiffon surveyed me with some suspicion. Yeah, she probably had to be onto me now.
“... Hm. Alright, I understand. You’re saying I shouldn’t settle! The more I think about it, the more foolish I was! Why settle for the first nice room you see when there are bigger and brighter horizons! Right then! A new adventure calls.“
She points her finger at me and I felt so lucky she was this dumb.
... Though after the crap I just said, I wasn’t sure I was one to talk.
“I’m recruiting you as my vassal! Keep your eyes peeled for good rooms and furnishings. I’ll need them.”
Why is everyone in this house recruiting me? Go recruit someone else.
But, whatever, this was easier than risking her ruining the surprise. And my mood was acting up; turns out this stupid leg was hurting more than I thought and I really just wanted to take a break now.
“Yeah, yeah, princess.“
“Princess... good, good! You’re already getting the hang of it! I suppose... I should let you go for now.I don’t want you shadowing my every move after all. So go forth! Go... go do cool things in my name!“
She threw a finger my face before trotting off, looking behind every now and again as if to make sure I’d really go and do those ‘cool things’. I had no intention of it. Though I honestly didn’t know what she meant, anyway. Now that I was alone again, I felt a million thoughts attack me at once.
It was... weird, having this free time, this free space. I felt like there were a million things I wanted to do and say. And yet, I didn’t have a desire to do anything. Like it’d just be easier to sit right here and watch as the hours passed. Between wanting to, needing to and fighting every impulse I had of doing anything at all... it was pretty weird.
The only thing I could compare it to was as if... I was stuck in some crane game. Being yanked one way, being bogged down under everything else. It helped more than I thought having Chiffon around. If nothing else, she was a distraction. And when I was doing pointless crap, I was somehow able to forget everything that happened. I could almost write it off as a joke, as sick as it sounds. But... it was a pill. And after a couple of hours, I found I was the same as always. Weighed down by the same paranoid and pressure I’d been the second I’d seen Anzai’s cold, dead corpse.
My feet began moving, taking me in a direction even I wasn’t sure of yet. But moving... I guess that, as simple as it was, made me feel a little better.
As soon as I resurfaced I was greeted by Yuunagi’s merry laughter. I made sure to glare at her but I wasn’t as embarrassed as I thought I’d be thankfully. Seemed like Chiffon’s bitter mumbling took up most of the attention, anyway. She squeezed out her ponytail as if she’d been soaked through and gave her feet a good stomp.
“Bah! I feel like I swallowed a cobweb!”
“Th-that’s why you gotta be careful...”
“At least we have a swimming pool now. It... kinda evens out?”
You sound so unsure, Yuunagi...
“The only thing to do is sate my sense of adventure! It’s the only thing that’ll ease this indignation.”
“Kaede!”
She’s... she actually remembered it. I’m in awe. My voice kinda comes out a little dazed.
“Uh... yeah?“
“We’re going! You’re attending, right? To the first floor!”
There were rooms I wanted to check, too so there was no real reason to say no. If I ran about a bit more, I might shake off some of this dust too. It’s not like I wanted to stay this messy either.
Chiffon lead the charge this time which Hirotsugu seemed particularly relieved about. I followed but I managed to give them both a thumbs-up before I slipped out of the door.
“Good luck!”
And it was back into the hall. God, this damn hall was so long. Halls were long, stairs were long... this free school mansion house was such torture. I doubt that was in Patchnuki’s plans but, man, it did add to the stress. Just a little. We were continuing on our merry way until we heard voices near the stairs.
“Wait! Wait right there!“
That was... Shiratori’s voice. His voice was so booming Chiffon stopped in place. She actually seemed a little intimidated.
“Nagase-kun, I’m telling you to stop right there!“
I hear him descend the stairs in a hurry. His voice is so loud it’s basically impossible not to hear him. If you’re around the area, I guess, anyway. I’m really not sure whether to interrupt it so I just kinda loiter upstairs.
“I... um... don’t want... I... I’m sorry. But... don’t...I d-don’t want to see your face right now.“
He seemed shellshocked but really... nothing seems to stop that guy.
“You have to at least hear me out! It’s important!“
Nagase stops in place but doesn’t bother facing him. Now that she’s actually staying it seems like he’s unsure of what to do next.
“Th... that... while I still believe everything being in the open is better... I have to admit the way I’ve... I could’ve breached things in a finer way. That was my bad! I apologize profusely!"
The quiet that stretched made me skin kinda tingle. I’ve always felt there are good silences and bad ones and this was... definitely not a good one.
“I’m... I’m, um... sorry, too...“
“B-because I’m not, uh... I’m... it’s like... I don’t think I can forgive you so easily...”
She looks really uncomfortable to be there and I’m beginning to feel bad even hearing it. But turning away now just feels weird. And I’m nosy.
“You didn’t... uh, um... I’m not sure how to put this but it’s not like... you really lost anything, right? I mean, you know, credibility! Faith. That kinda... floaty thing. But... ‘you don’t deserve to be here’. ‘You cheated’. Those are things, um... I think... I’m sure, that uh, some people might be thinking. B-because I... stole. Because of what you said.“
“I think it’s... easy to say things are better in the open, but, um... is that really true? I definitely think that sometimes you don’t have to know the full story. Because, um, if anything, doesn’t think make me more of a target?”
“It doesn’t! Don’t be ridiculous! Nagase-kun, nobody else will die! I’m going to see to that. And you got here on your own talent, surely! I refuse to believe you don’t belong here! ”
“B-but you can’t, right? You couldn’t get people to go to your meeting thingy... so, I’m... the thinking is that... you can’t stop this either. And... and... and... and it’s my life! It’s not really your business! W-when you act like you’re helping all you do is drive us further apart.”
“And I’m... and I’m scared to be around someone like that. Someone who can callously just... out someone’s secret like that... I’m scared of you, S-Shiratori-san.”
“There’s... there’s no need for that. If it’d help, I can tell you my own secret! If... if it’d get you to trust me, then--!”
“Sorry... I’m so sorry... I just... I just don’t think... it doesn’t work like that, Shiratori-san... you don’t... ’get’ people to trust. I think... um... I think you trust people to trust. I-it’s not really your choice... you have to believe in them... and... in wanting to expose everyone’s secrets, I think, um... all that really did was... like... it showed that you really don’t trust anyone, right? S... so I can’t... you can’t want trust if you won’t trust yourself...”
“Yuu-chan didn’t... judge me at all. She didn’t ask... she said... ‘Chi-chan must’ve had her reasons’. And it... and it made me so happy.“
“Forgive me for, um... for like... this part, but... aren’t you only here because you were told to reflect on it? Yuu-chan and K-Kumatani-san gave you, they like, you know, they were on your case. So you went and did this, but... if you’re only reflecting because they told you to, I don’t really think it’s reflecting.”
“No, but! Look -- listen! We’re strong enough to support each other! I believe in us! Definitely, definitely, definitely! But you have to be willing to give us a shot! I had every intention of telling everyone my secret as well. I just ... needed some good will first. If we all shared what was on our minds, what we kept hidden, we could allay our own fears! Fear is what causes accidents! If we believe in each other, nobody else needs to get hurt! I’m sure of it! I know I... I go too far sometimes! But I’m trying to make amends. Nagase-kun, please! Believe me, I’m trying.”
“B-but! But Shiratori-san, it’s... I’m sorry... I’m sorry! I’ll try but I need some space. And... and I still think... you need to think this through a little more. Because nobody will ever follow the lead of someone who won’t respect others. T-that’s the truth. In reality and fiction. Don’t... don’t push this. Please... don’t make me doubt you more than I do...”
Nagase’s inward body language said a lot. Through the whole conversation, she’d barely made eye contact. She... really was scared and I wasn’t sure I could blame her. It’d happened so fast and... people had died so soon after I hadn’t really considered her feelings and that made me feel like a real shitty person. To have a secret like that just blurted out... I hadn’t put much thought into it but I’m sure others had.
‘She doesn’t deserve to be here’... I couldn’t guarantee that thought hadn’t passed through someone’s head even if it hadn’t crossed mine.
With one last muttered sorry, Nagase inched away from Shiratori before sprinting away, best she could. Shiratori made a vague effort to stop her but his energy seemed to die on him half-way.
“Why... why can’t I do this right?! I’m trying to help! I’m really trying to help!”
His head kinda drops and he sighs deeply before checking something on his ID and entering a door himself. If I checked my own ID, it seemed like... Nagase had escaped to the Arts Room and Shiratori had entered the AV Room. I sighed too. That drama froze up all my joints somehow... and I wasn’t even a part of it. Seemed like it wasn’t just me who ended up affected, too.
“Th... that was tense! You people are so roundabout!“
“You’re a people too, y’know.”
“Fufu! I’m above you guys, though. Even those weird killing rules don’t apply to me. I wouldn’t demean myself to do such things even if they did.“
Her face actually becomes... dare I say it, thoughtful.
“Hmph. You trip up then wallow and regret all the time. Isn’t that tiring? Idiot Red’s an idiot. If it means something to you, stand with pride and state your case!"
“Don’t think it’s always that simple. I mean, not like you’re getting a warm welcome here from everyone.“
“So? If I cared about your opinions, I’d make concessions. But I don’t; you’re all strangers. If you don’t like me as I am, I’m not going to stretch myself into a shape you like for no reason! And if I did care, I wouldn’t stop until I was forgiven. Living with such heavy regrets sounds so tiring. Lamenting over poor results because it failed once? Such arrogance and cheek! I’d have someone beg 100 times over for wronging me. You all do things in such a confusing fashion - perhaps you’d be happier if you just spat it out directly. Honestly, I can’t figure you elaborate people out.”
“... Directly, huh... sounds... difficult but it’s not like I’m against it.“
Wait, did she just call herself simple?
No, but more seriously... I kinda wanted that too - simplicity. But it’s not that easy... I don’t think so, anyway. I mean, even if you didn’t want to regret something, life could mess you up good and proper and make you. It’s not like you always have a choice. And it’s not like these things are always so clear in the moment.
“Phew! What a topic! It gives me goosebumps - hate it! Hey. I’m bored! Let’s check a door.“
On the bright side, she’s never down for too long. It’s fine. I wanted to take my mind off it, too. All this house gave me was shitty feelings and deep things to think about and I wanted no part of either. It was... a lot easier before this. I could just switch off my mind and go wherever I wanted.
I could escape.
This house was a trap in a lot of ways, I guess. I could feel the atmosphere strangle me sometimes. Try and drown me in its nothing. So I had to keep moving. And trying.
According to Mana, Hirotsugu’s been planning some... surprise or something here. The Break Room’s pretty close so at the very least it’s not much of a walk. It was at the very end of the corridor and you could see a little bit of the inside before you ever entered due to a glass window in the door.
I pressed the handle down and let myself in only to be shocked by a clatter and a crash.
“Oh Hiro-chan, are you okay?”
“F-f-fi-fine! Ju-ju-just just f-fine! C-c-cause, you know, a hero n-ne-ne-never f-fa-fa-falls!“
“Kay-oh, just take care.”
I entered with some caution, not wanting to alarm Hirotsugu too much and, to my surprise, Chiffon seemed to show similar restraint. The stunt double was too busy picking up his mess, some coloured pieces of paper and scissors to pay us much mind so Yuunagi ended up being the one to see us first.
Instead of greeting us, she put a finger to her lips as if to shh us. What... was she up to?
She creeps closer to the fumbling Hirotsugu with an amused smile on her face. Chiffon grabs my sleeve in some kind of anticipation.
“Hiro-chan! Quick! It’s Aokami-san from Yokai Rangers!“
He bangs his knee on the table and, undaunted, rises to his feet, looking in every direction. The second he sees us, he almost trips right back over the table but Yuunagi catches him. Not that I think she needed to; the guy knows his stunts.
“M-M-Ma-Maki-sannnn...”
His voice sounds really pitiful... the reaction was kinda funny but I also kinda feel for the guy.
“Sorry, sorry! Saw the opportunity and just kinda had to! You okay, buddy?“
“F... fu-funny... I w-wa-was able to pa-par-participate in th-the the j-jo-joke? Th-then... then I th-th-think I’m ok-ok-kay with it!”
“You’re a good sport!”
“B-bu-but... I c-ca-can... see... s-sh-she!”
He points shakily at Chiffon
“Wh-wh-what’s sh-she d-d-do-doing doing here?! Ma-Ma-Maki-san, th-this-this is a huge problem!”
Yuunagi doesn’t seem to mind him shaking her roughly by the shoulders.
“It’s fine if we keep it hush-hush. Just play it cool, big guy, you got this.“
Hirotsugu takes a deep breath before jabbing a finger at Chiffon.
“Y-yo-you’re n-not welcome here! G-go-go away!”
“Go away?!”
“Y... yeah! Re-return fr-fr-from whence you c-c-came! G-go go home!”
"Wha... go home? I don’t know where that is, you go home!”
A sort of warbled wheeze comes from beneath Hirotsugu’s mask and I’m guessing that reply was really not what he wanted. Yuunagi swoops in and hooks her arm around Chiffon’s.
“Fon-fon, come with? The coffee this machine makes is dee-lish.“
“Eh? Whaa-- w-well... since you’re offering me such attention! Onwards!”
Yuunagi gives me a stealthy wink and while I don’t... really know what she’s up to, I think I can vaguely get a sense of it.
“... P... pa-party... th-th-that was th-the-the idea... um... I th-th-thought it would ma-ma-maybe raise ev-everyone’s sp-spi-spi-spirits... and... th-th-that girl, sh-she d-d-do-doesn’t really know a-any of us. S-s-so I th-th-thought... I’d d-d-do th-th-this as a welcoming p-pa-party...”
“Oh... so that’s what it was. You were just trying to keep it a secret.”
“I’m! Ac-actually v-v-v-v-very ba-ba-bad with secrets... b-b-but Ma-Ma-Maki-san it’d be more f-fun th-th-that way.”
“Huh... what do you know. That’s a really nice idea.”
“D-do-do you th-th-think... th-th-that girl will b-b-be happy...?”
I actually wasn’t sure. I’d like to think so, I know I’d be but I hadn’t actually seen pure joy from Chiffon yet. More just... a smug aura. Did she experience happiness like most humans? I honestly couldn’t be sure. But this was still worth a shot and it was honestly nice to just see Hirotsugu and Yuunagi in such high spirits planning it.
“Definitely. You’re doin’ something good here. Can’t wait to see it all done.“
It’s amazing how I can see how he’s feeling so clearly when he’s still got that mask on.
“Well... b-b-back to work with me!“
I salute him and watch as he hurriedly puts all the paper back on the table.
This room seemed... honestly really comfortable. There was a big sofa and a TV there. I kinda wondered if it worked. There were vending machines, snacks and sodas both trapped in ‘em and a lot of circular tables and folding chairs. Seems like more could be gotten too, if need be. A clock sat on the wall, ticking away minute by minute.
Seems like Chiffon’s still over by Yuunagi. I guess I could talk to her or bother Hirotsugu a little more.
The swimming pool’s door is cold to the touch and somehow you can just feel the watery atmosphere before you even enter. You just know. Well, it’s that and the stench of chlorine that seeps through the door. The cold metal makes my fingers tingle for a second.
The door opens easier than I thought it would and reveals a really large room. Obviously the main attraction is the pool itself but there’s a kinda majesty to whole thing, just how big it is. There’s a diving board, chair for lifeguards and some other seats about here and there. I see one familiar face beat me here.
It’d be hard to miss her and I guess, all things considered, it makes sense she’d been in a place like this. Close to the sea and all that.
"... Geez... that girl...”
Rie sighs, staring hard at her own reflection. I kinda contemplated leaving her be but Chiffon’s loud voice put that thought to bed almost immediately.
“Oh. This place reeks.”
The sailor tilts her head our way now that she’s been alerted to our presence. There’d been this... gentleness or distance on her face earlier but now she just seemed unimpressed. Or... like her usual self, I guess. Nobody wanted to appear too weak at a time like this. I know that was true for me.
“Well ain’t this a curious duo. The hell are you doin’ hanging out with the pipsqueak?“
“Someone oughta keep an eye on her.“
“You’re babysittin’ now?”
My eyes wander to Chiffon and she’s... ah, she’s gone. She’s off having a looking at the pool supplies. So that chick’s not even listening, huh. I don’t even have the energy to be surprised.
“Sure feels that way.”
I thought she’d be amused by that but there’s no trace of a smile on her face; not even a smirk. Instead, she folds her arms and glares daggers at the girl. Not that the other party notices.
“I don’t like it. Expecting me to swallow some chick's just randomly here and oh, she doesn’t remember anything... come on, that stinks and you know it.”
“Sounds bad, sure, but our story’s pretty similar. It’s a rough pill but it checks out, you know?“
She shakes her head.
“That note said ‘16′, right? Her being here makes 17. Doesn’t check out. And she’s annoying to boot. I know that info comes from that lying, murdering son-of-a...“
Rie cracks her neck and knuckles in an effort to collect herself.
“You know, that motherff... Hanji. Since he was talking his head off about how much he schemed this all I don’t think he’d make such a stupid typo. Which means, he either didn’t plan for her or she’s his secret weapon.”
Secret weapon, huh...?
“... She’s so dumb, though.”
Rie seems to consider that and snorts.
“Yeah. I noticed that, too. I dunno man, just don’t like it.“
If someone doesn’t like something, they don’t like it. There’s no way you’re going to force someone to think otherwise. You’re definitely not gonna do it arguing. Honestly, wasn’t even sure of my own feelings about her yet. Her whole existence was a question mark... but whether I believed her or not, I wasn’t sure. I wasn’t sure I trusted anyone here even though, despite my intentions, I was warming to some of them. Yuunagi and Manabu came to mind especially there.
“Oh! Oh! Satsuma!“
“I think she’s calling you, ‘Satsuma’.“
I sighed.
“Duty calls.”
“Godspeed.
Walking over to Chiffon allowed me to realize, at the very least, it wasn’t just Rie - Seiyama was here too, trotting along the pool’s edge. I just hadn’t noticed him until now. But I had no time to strike up a conversation - the second I approached the girl, she grabbed my sleeve and dragged me to a door.
“You forgot my name already? C’mon...”
“Never mind that! Look at this! Are you looking?”
“It’s a door.”
“Yes! I peeked inside and saw cleaning supplies. Isn’t that grand? At the very least, we can keep this place very clean.“
Hey, why is that your priority?
“A~nd! There are locker rooms! Right past that door on the other side. They’ve got towels, suits, goggles... lots of stuff! And a section for girls, boys and people who don’t feel like either, too! Well? Impressed? I took time out of my busy schedule to scout the area out. To then SHARE that information without even being asked... aren’t you overwhelmed by my altruism?”
“... Thanks for opening two doors.“
I meant it sarcastically but she seemed to take pride in it anyway.
“Hm! You’re very welcome.”
“... But... wait. So you went into the locker rooms? And you can, what, go wherever you want? There’s no ID slots or like, special doors?”
“I just read the signs. But there’s nothing stopping you from going anywhere you want. Ah, but... that doesn’t mean you should go into the wrong section intentionally! I won’t be an accomplice to such deviancy!“
I reached for her face and gave her stretchy cheek another pull for being irritating before I’d even realized it. Like that had ever even crossed my mind.
“Ow! Owww! Stobbit! What’re you gonna do if you tear my face, huh?! I’ll... I’d sue you!”
“Here’s some advice for you: think before you say dumbass crap.“
Chiffon hissed at me before skipping off to do something else. I felt it in my bones; if I talked with her again so soon I’d just get mad again so I looked towards Rie and Seiyama. Maybe since I’m here I oughta talk to them.
As soon as I agreed to having her around, Chiffon was shockingly on best behaviour; at least, that’s how it felt to me. The rooms nearest to the clinic seemed honestly a bit on the dull side. Maybe they were interesting, sure, but I just couldn’t see an arts room as appealing right now. Maybe it was just me. The most local and interesting place I could see was the pool. It’d be cool just to look at it, you know? Not like I wanted to swim or anything.
With a location in mind, I began moving and Chiffon trailed behind me, occasionally making small talk. There was this huge and grand stair case we had to get through before we got there... two, in a way, as it went up to a little corridor that just had some tableside desks, urns and potted plants before leading to another staircase. The Hanjis sure love their stairs, huh.
I thought I’d take a break and Chiffon followed suit, if only to glare daggers at the urns.
“Ugh, I detest passing through here... I’m a person of taste but I just can’t see the appeal of vases... what do they do? How pointless! It’s the cheapest of the rich that feel the need to show off their fortune...”
I can’t disagree... but the way she was talking made it sound like she was rich too. Then again, she also seemed to think she was an amazing person. One thing was for sure, from what she was saying this definitely wasn’t her first time passing through.
“You’ve been here before, haven’t you?”
“Yes, well... in some vein. I know of it. Ran past most of it.“
It seemed like a stupid realization but as she spoke, it hit me that I didn’t know anything about her. Sure, she lost her memory apparently but where did she come from? She seemed to be expecting us but I didn’t know why... or how, for that matter. Apparently Kuma and maybe Yuunagi had talked to her about it but I was as clueless as ever.
“Where’d you come from, anyway?“
“Oh dear... did your parents never give you the talk? Well--”
“Not that. Try again.”
She thinks for a bit before giving it another go.
“I’m a pure-blooded Japanese maiden.”
Why is this so hard?
“Are you seriously that stupid?”
She huffs.
“If you don’t like my answers, refine your questions.”
I sighed and tried to put this in the simplest terms I could.
“Where have you been all this time? Nobody ever saw you yet you were actin’ all high and mighty ‘bout us being late and all that. Means you were expecting us, right?“
“As I told your friend in the white coat, I was here! Somewhere.“
“‘Somewhere’.”
"Believe it or not I know how it sounds! Hmph.“
“The room I was in was pitch black. As for why I was there, I can’t remember. Obviously. It took me longer than I’d liked to admit to even find my way out. But it fell naturally, like most obstacles, to my natural grace and acumen.”
“Oh, your ‘natural grace’, huh?“
“Jealous?“
“Oh, I’m something alright.”
Skeptical. I’m skeptical.
“I vaguely toured the area. But I didnt stay in anywhere for too long. Everything was so grand and exact, it all began looking the same after a while. Truly a dull affair. Finally, I found that room of computers and I saw all of you! You were supposed to come find me but you never did! I even saw you use that elevator! ... Eventually I was able to use the one on my end and made sure to give you a piece of my mind when I saw you return. Is that specific enough for you?“
“Hmmm. I mean, specific’s a little...“
She whirled around on her heel to glare at me.
“You take your doubtful tone and you swallow it down you boorish beetroot!”
“I wasn’t doubting you! Geez... you get so wound up over nothing...”
Chiffon didn’t speak much after that but I could tell she was kinda sulking. I mean, she didn’t make it subtle. She steps away so we stop taking our break and move again. I paused and did something even I couldn’t believe. I thought about things in her shoes. I thought to myself, ‘what would Anzai do at a time like this’ and I kinda came to that conclusion. And when I did that, I couldn’t help but feel a little bad for her. I mean, I don’t even know what I’d do in that kinda situation. You wake up alone and can’t even remember your name... you’re all alone in a place like this with no one to talk to. Then you see a bunch of people and you can’t reach them at all... yikes.
You know, all things considered, I’m kinda surprised she’s been this easy to talk to. I let her take the lead while I’m thinking but she stares down at me with some suspicion from the stairs. Whether she’s waiting for me to catch up or wants to start something, I have no idea.
“What are you up to?“
“Nothing, just... sorry. Sorry we left you alone.”
“... Oh, that’s disgusting.”
"I’m SORRY? I was trying to--”
“Only a man of true low stature wastes time with words like that. If you have energy to waste apologizing, keep moving! I’m shocked you thought I was such a petty person, to hold such a grudge! I’m not so lowly I’d think like that. If you don’t like what you did, fix it next time. It’s as simple as that.”
Ugh, she makes it so hard to be nice to her... but at least she’s back in high spirits. She seems pretty simple, if nothing else. That makes dealing with her easy. And it means she’s not as much of a threat... seems that way, anyway. After what I saw... after what we went through... that’s kind of a relief. And I suppose... in a way, she has a point. At the very least, she’s speaking a language I get.
Wait, I hope that doesn’t mean I’m simple.
I take back the lead and I manage to get my hand to the pool’s door before Chiffon. That petty victory makes me happy. It’ll be nice to see the area - it’ll be a change of pace. At least, that’s my hope.
Only a few seconds passed I think, not even minutes but I felt like I’d been sitting in that dining room for hours. When I finally mustered up the effort to move it felt like my body was creaking in protest. But I needed this, I needed something to distract me.
Everyone scattered, heading off in their own directions. I vaguely wondered about that mysterious girl again before shrugging it off; I wasn’t in the mood to track down one specific person anyway. And besides, someone was already here - local.
Convenient. Manabu off by himself looking into space out in the main hall.
He’d always seemed fairly mature. Or at the very least, like he had his act together... so I guess I admired that some. But after the trial... he was pretty shaken up. I guess that’s obvious but it’s still weird to see in a way. I offer him a wave but he didn’t really seem to notice me until I spoke up.
“Yo.“
He attempts a vague wave back.
“Kaede. I wish I could greet you better.”
That was definitely a fake smile.
“Sorry. If you need some time to yourself then...“
“No, it’s alright. I get what you’re doing. I get it, just... sorry, I guess I’m just not all there yet.”
This whole thing seemed like a minefield to me. I’d never been Mr. Social Graces. if I met someone, there was an 80% chance I’d say something dumb and mess the whole thing up. If I was a little smarter, I would’ve thought it over. But I wasn’t good at that. Maybe I make him mad, sure, but it’s possible something I say could also make things a little better. I dunno. Worth a try, I guess.
”Mana, I know this is gonna sound like the stupid copy-paste stuff everyone says but it’s not your fault. I mean, you didn’t hold Hanji at gunpoint and tell him to do that crap.”
That chuckle’s forced too. It kinda hurts that he feels the need to fake it around me but I get it.
I get it, but it still sucks.
“I know... I know but it’s stuck in my head. I didn’t... I didn’t really think about the consequences at all. When we were in that room, when everything was heating up I was just... determined to prove he did it. The worst part is, I’m not sure how much I even cared about Anzai-chan... or Wakatsuki-chan. I just knew he was lying and I wanted him to own up to it. For everyone to see what I saw. But... but...“
“Not like that.”
“Not like that, no...”
I sigh. It was easy to write Hanji off as a bad guy. I feel it’d be a weight off my mind if I did that. Hell, he’d given us enough evidence to. But it didn’t sit right with me. And even if he was a bad guy, I dunno... what, was I suddenly supposed to be happy he was dead now? I couldn’t figure out my own feelings there.
“It’s horrifying. Adrenaline. In the heat of the moment, you don’t feel anything at all. But when it’s all over, you’re just left with the aftermath. And you wonder... how did it get so bad? And why couldn’t I stop it before it got to this point...“
Wasn’t expecting him to speak up again like that. I wasn’t sure how personal this was... like, was this a one-off or was this a constant thing for him?
“... We just need to stop making a mess of things then. I mean... Hanji... he said he’d planned this out, like, he was central to all this, right? So was Wakatsuki. I feel shitty saying it but if they’re gone now... then maybe we’ll be okay.“
“You sound like Shiratori-kun.”
“Ugh! Gross!“
“Ahaha. In some ways, it’s a praise. He’s an idiot but he means well. That kind of positive thinking... is just a little hard for me.“
“I’m not saying everything’s roses and cream, don’t get me wrong. I’m not gonna just forget about what happened. But if we don’t move on, if we don’t at least try something we’ll just be wallowing in our own self-pity. I can’t guarantee nothing else bad’ll happen... or that no one else will die. That’d just be wishful thinking. But what I can say is that we know more now. And maybe that knowledge is good enough to keep us trucking. I mean. I guess all I’m saying is: it’s something. Something’s more than nothing. I’ll take what I can get.”
“Haha... Kaede-kun, you’re very cool. That’s a good mindset. Unfortunately I’m very good at wallowing in self-pity. It’s a bad habit.“
And then, suddenly... something clicked in my head. Something about Manabu felt like it made sense to me.
“... Nah, it’s not self-pity, right? It’s just... you’re overly kind, aren’t you? You’re the sort of person who gives up so that someone else has a chance. Putting others first. That’s why you got all self-righteous about Hanji. You knew something wasn’t right and you wanted to protect us. But when you reailzed what that meant... or... you know, when that happened... you blamed yourself. Because you accused Hanji, he died. You caused that.“
The genuine surprise on his face almost takes me by surprise. The words kinda tumbled out of my mouth before I could stop them and now I was kinda feeling weird about it. I mean, it’s not really my thing to analyze people.
“Uhh, sorry, that was...“
“You’re pretty astute... that caught me off-guard. Takeru’s said something similar before. The two of you are pretty different so... I was surprised. I guess... you’re not that far-off. But calling it ‘kindness’... that somehow feels too great a word.“
Mentioning that name seems to make Manabu all the more distant so I reach out and pat his shoulder.
“He’ll be okay.“
“Mm. He’s a strong guy... much moreso than me. So I want to believe... but... everything’s so...”
He sighs.
“I’d just settle for seeing him. I miss him.”
Manabu’s not crying or anything but he still rubs his eyes and heaves another huge sigh.
“I’m sorry, I really am poor company right now. I’m a useless guy, I guess. I’ll be... I’ll get better, Kaede, I will. I just need to think some things through.”
“I get it. Sorry for getting in your space.”
“No... it was nice. Thank you for reaching out. And... ah, actually, could I ask you for a favour?”
He reaches into his pocket and brings out an accessory of some kind. On closer inspection it kinda looks like a bracelet... some thick wooden beads. Real rustic-looking thing.
“Kotobuki-chan dropped this. I saw her heading to the classroom in a rush. I wanted to catch up with her but... I realized I was... I really wasn’t in the right place to speak to her. If you’re checking in on people, can you return it?”
Ah, now that I think about it... yeah, makes total sense a bracelet like this would belong to that chick. I nod and take it, putting it in my own pocket. I wonder if she’s okay. Seems like she’s been pushing herself a ton. Maybe... she’s still in the classroom. I oughta check it out.
But... okay, now this sound’s been bugging me for a bit now but I’ve been ignoring it. Now that neither of us are speaking though it’s become all the more annoying. Seems like it’s coming from the elevator, a kind of hammering or clanking. The elevator doesn’t look all shady and hidden anymore... guess that makes sense. I stride over to it and give it a rough punch to relieve some stress. But to my surprise, the doors open and reveal...
“Kya! Y-you pervert!”
Oh, if ONLY I could kick this fat ball of fluff across the room...
“What the hell are you doing here? Don’t you have some B-tier script to memorize or some shit?”
“Rude! That’s so rude! Who raised you to speak to me like that?! I’ve never been so! So!”
Patchnuki wobbles around for a bit before almost shrugging, as much as it can anyway.
“... It’s fine, I’m totally zen. My therapist’s been recommending I learn to let things go more and... you know what? This feels right. This is good. This is progress.“
“Goodbye.”
I move to shut the door but it squeezes between the doors. I kinda back away, I don’t wanna like, accidentally hurt it and risk getting zapped again but it’s kinda. Content to stick in place, all squished between the two elevator doors. If I felt more up to it, I’d laugh at the image honestly.
“HEY! Wait, you nasty little brat! Aren’t you curious? Whatever was Patchnuki-sama doing in the elevator? ... Hmm? You’re dying to know, aren’t you?“
“I’m not. Go away.”
“Hey. Hey now. Listen. This is interesting. Hey. Look, I’m... I’m actually letting you visit the west side of the building. I just gotta do a bit of tinkering on this thing and... yeah! Yeah, it’ll be cool, trust me, there’s a pool, there’s gonna be some wine... it’ll be great!”
Manabu, to my surprise, walked up to the door with gentle footsteps and with even gentler hands, pushed Patchnuki back into the elevator, allowing the doors to shut once more.
“Thank you for your time. Goodbye.”
I couldn’t help but snort that time.
“My hero.”
“Hey, least I could do.“
That smile’s the most genuine I’ve seen yet. I’m glad.
“If we can take Patchnuki’s word on it... I guess more of the house will be available to us now. Maybe that’ll give us more to work with.“
“But why? Why unlock these areas?”
He shrugs.
“It seems to like a game. I suppose these little additions and caveats help spice things up. In any case... I’ll stick around here. If anything changes, I’ll let you know.”
“... Yeah. Thanks. I’m gonna go check on Buki.”
Manabu nods and I return the gesture before heading to the classroom. I distinctly remember the room. I talked to Hanji there before... and Manabu too, now that I think about it. Those conversations weren’t so long ago but somehow the words were already blurring in my mind. Was I going to forget them? They seemed so trivial at the time but now that Hanji was dead it was sticking with me. It’s like that feeling during breakfast all over again... fish bone in my throat. I’m not that smart. I’m not confident I can remember the important stuff let alone anything sentimental. But what if I forget what he looks like? I don’t want that.
