#hb chazwick

[phantom-of-christine]

Newest short made me remember this sketch I did a while back

[iriso-page]

That would also explain why he only ever brags about having one big dick instead of two. Like, two dicks would probably be a bit more impressive than one large dick, so uoud think that's what Chaz would brag about. But he doesn't. He only talks about a singular large dick.

It's brag worthy. You can't really blame him 😏

[iriso-page]

So, we all assume Chaz has two dicks, cause shark. And while I really like this idea, I have another one; what if he only has one dick, and that's why it's so big? What if shark demons usually have two average sized dicks, but Chaz was born with his dicks merged into one, which is why it's so BIG.

BIG BRAIN ANON OVER HERE 👀

I think people like their sharks too much to go for this, but this would absolutely be perfect for Chaz. It might even explain why he's always vying for imps instead of his own species 😏 They don't know what to expect 🍆

[iriso-page]

Honestly, I feel like if Chaz apologized his ass off and.... you know, DIDNT try to force Moxxie into marrying him to get at Crimsons money... I think Moxxie might have forgiven him.

AU where Chaz is the ex-boyfriend that's constantly trying to get a threesome going and is almost constantly found crashing on Moxxie & Millie's couch.

[iriso-page]

My hyperfixation with sharks is only gonna get worse because of Chaz and his shitheaded-ness

I already follow a bunch of sciency animal people, and I refuse to believe it's a coincidence that someone made a post on why Thrasher Sharks have tails like that soon after the episode was posted.

Apparently they whip fish with them. Do with that information what you will.

[iriso-page]

Listen, Striker will always, ALWAYS own my heart. He loves rent free in my head and chest, and there's no one that can replace him.... Chaz, however..... Chaz can stay IF he pitches in on the bills and maybe cooks dinner once a week.

You think this man knows how to cook without setting himself on fire?

You'd be lucky if he gave you a single slice of pizza after he orders an entire pie for himself. You're never getting rent.

[iriso-page]

CHAZWICK THURMAN NSFW HEADCANONS 🔞

~ Gee, Chaz, how come mom let you have two wieners?

~ He's not lying when he says he's big. He's a big shark, it just makes sense that he's proportional.

~ When his claspers get going, it really will become the 'cum zone.'

~ It doesn't help that they cum at the same time.

~ Though not at the same speed, so you get all the fun of a money shot AND having to squeeze it out of him.

~ They don't always get hard at the same time, so you better warm up those hands or mouth.

~ If one isn't currently occupying a hole, he likes to aim it towards your face.

~ He might be nice enough to lick it off for you.

~ They also both piss at the same time. Do with that information what you will.

~ You will be doing most of the work no matter which position or activity occurs.

~ He will argue for the rights to top, but he's not against putting his hole to good use.

~ It's the only time his smugness melts away, if only for a moment. He'll still brag that his hole is the best and that's why you wanted to fill it so badly.

~ Don't expect much afterwards. He's drained quite literally, and almost immediately passes out.