#himbo thor

[theprismaticparamour]

I got to attend a free screening of Masters of the Universe. Free tickets. Free popcorn’ drink.

Let’s just say, No himbo has ever himbo’ed so hard!

Of course Loki would stumble upon He Man and spent 9 months convincing Thor that this is a common midgardian Halloween tradition.

And then Thor comes out to you & his brother, in his he man costume.

Loki: 👀📸📸📸📸

You:

[cosmicwhoresimpingismyliving]

✨I have been waiting for this moment✨

✨Ladies and Gentlemen ✨

✨Them✨

[angelyuji]

ahhhhhh loki!!!!! could you do maybe something for a yan!loki??

OMG YES!! I’VE BEEN THINKING ABOUT THIS FOR DAYYS!! thank you for requesting!!!!!

cw // kidnapping, mentions of stockholm syndrome, mentions of mental and physical torture, yandere behavior, gods acting like they own humans, evil loki, himbo thor

·         loki does what he wants

·         so if he wants you? he can take you

·         he does not care about your schedule, your life, or your opinion

·         you can cry and scream and plead but he does not care

·         ur a normal human being so there’s really nothing you can do against a GOD anyway

·         in his mind, he owns you

·         plus he has no patience to slowly add himself in your life

·         you don’t see it coming either

·         like one day you’re minding your own business, setting up for dinner and BAM

·         you’re in his bed, resting in his arms as he reads some book about….magic or smth

·         …anyway

·         loki tries his best to be gentle since he knows that midgardians are tiny and fragile

·         but, like i said, mf does not have patience

·         he can only take so much before he snaps on you

·         “darling, i’ve tried being patient, but you’re testing me.”

·         bro omg he’d growl as he stalks towards you and his eyes would GLOW GREEN

·         pls im going F E R AL

·         ….i better stop

·         so anyway he’d have you trapped in his bedroom in asgard and obviously thor won’t know about it

·         because yk…thors kinda oblivious to everything around him lol

·         honestly i have no idea what time is so pick your choice abt which loki im talking about

·         either way, hes scary and he’d force you to love him

·         whether it’s starving you or isolating you till you’re begging him to come back

·         “please, im sorry. don’t leave me pls”

·         “have you learned your lesson yet, princess?”

·         “yes...yes, i have.”

·         “good girl”

·         honestly there is basically no escape from him, so stockholm syndrome is the only way through your relationship :)

 -

honestly im literally in love with loki and i would willingly get kidnapped by him because loki is my only reason for living :) delusional izzi is back and ready to make more loki content *fuck boy smirk*

[gideonaweaponachild]

google knows what I'm talking about (both of these were the first results)

[dorian-they-ao3]

MCU head canon

Shania Twain wrote “That Don’t Impress Me Much” after a one night stand with Tony Stark

Steve found out and now tells FRIDAY to play it every time Tony enters a room

Peter found out and immediately added it to his Mr. Stark playlist ironically

Thor found out and congratulated him on having a “warrior’s ballad” written in his honour

Rhodey found out and installed floor liners in the Audis with Shania’s face on them

Pepper found out and got him a pocket comb engraved with the song title

Bruce found out and now he says “What do you think, you’re Elvis or something?” every time Tony butts in on his projects

Natasha found out and now exclusively calls him Brad Pitt

[riathedreamer]

all of you non-danish people are so freakign unlucky not to have grown up with gay heimdal. fuck marvel. we had the real shit in a show where the norse gods were all dumbasses and i love them so much

[thesenesx]

Taika Waititi gave Jane Mjolnir so Thor could take his rightful place as the honourary himbo of the Goth Bitch Club™

[cosmicwhoresimpingismyliving]

Me; basically gone off marvel

Marvel; drops the trailer for Thor Love & Thunder.

Me; No…you will not tempted me

Marvel; Himbo Thor, King Valkyrie, Jane Foster as female Thor

Me;