#hot messes

[bklynmusicnerd]

Mickey and Morgan have to be one of the most toxic duos in modern BB history. Just awful allies to each other and everyone else.

[mumblelard]

It kind of suggests that "hot minute" is sometimes used in an anti-hyperbolic sense to mean "a long time", and ... "Hot minute" is often used in a sense of "busy" or "rushed", vs implying a literal short amount of time.

Since when has "a hot minute" meant a long time? - English Language & Usage

either this perversely functional, but totally unnecessary, rhetorical neologism, anti-hyperbolic, has short-circuited my brain, or i’ve been sniffing the wrong kind of glue again

[la-di-doodles]

Help I have a problem

[buffshipper8490]

[bd-ask-jacks-and-spades]

OK, I really want to help you guys, but realizing all of you guys are a hot mess. Trust issues of the wild zoo i can understand why i seem to be a little sketchy so as my apologies.

♠: I figured it out.

♠: Tumblr thinks we're a charity case.

🐕: Maybe they'll stop thinking it if I stab 'em a few times.

🇬🇧: Which you can't. If you could, you already would have.

♠: I think I know just what we need.

♠: First of all, Jack, I'm gonna make you a goddamn prosthetic leg.

🇬🇧: Me?

♠: Yes you, the other Jack isn't missing any legs now, is he?

🇬🇧: Right.

♠: Since you're the most pitiful-looking of the three of us, getting you a leg that's not a fucking wall spike should improve our image.

🐕: Our? We're not a fucking group or anything.

♠: Tell that to the internet.

🐕: I'm not letting you touch my arm to make a new one or some shit.

♠: Fine. But we're all going to need suits. Now, I don't know shit about fashion. So we're going to need to consult someone good at looking sharp.

♠: We need to find a DD.

[artfornaught]

Just finished Fallen Hero: Rebirth and I laughed afterwards about how Ortega first sees Ida after all those years drinking a beer alone in a diner.

Let the hot mess reign.

[parlezkate]

Title: Tommy Pays for It — Round Five (AO3) Rating: M for sex, violence, language, substance abuse Words: 6400 Excerpt:

The girl harrumphed and leaned on the bar with one elbow to look at Tommy. She was taking the bait. Why do girls always take the bait? She narrowed her eyes and looked him over, finally asking: “Why are you such a dick? I could be a really nice girl and you’d—”

“You’re not,” Tommy interrupted. He glanced at her briefly, just long enough to make full eye contact, before looking up at the TV with feigned boredom. “Nice girls don’t tell a guy sitting by himself at a bar to buy them a drink.”

She looked genuinely insulted by that for a moment and then cracked a smile. “You’re not wrong. What’s your name?”

He set his beer down and slowly cocked his head to the side until he was flat-out scrutinizing her through half-lidded eyes. “Tommy,” he replied, after a few beats. He took another drink of his beer and looked away from her again, turning his attention to anything else.

“Aren’t you going to ask my name?” she challenged him, as if he’d broken some kind of code of conduct.

“Nope,” Tommy answered, itching his ear and gesturing to the bartender. When he came over, he ordered another shot of Jameson.

“Wow—buying yourself another drink but not me? So rude,” she snorted. She was off balance, and he liked it that way. “Why don’t you want to know my name?”

Tommy shrugged. “Because I’m not trying to fuck you.”

[artfornaught]

More OC's that I made accidentally and adore. For some reason they are detectives, where he is a psychic with the personality of a golden retriever, and she is a supernatural badass with a bad personality. They are walking disasters.

They don't have names yet, but her code name is Snake Eyes and he is Other Guy.