This might require some background info about horse obsession life to make sense! I'm pretty sure it makes sense. Just... lean into it.
I have been a Horse Girl (gender neutral) since the first time I ever laid my eyes upon a horse/pony, and so, I have read a lot of Horse Girl Books in my days. We are talking hundreds, like just. Insane amounts of horse books. I have written an alarming amount of essays and papers on the subject of horse books, many about how they very, very often are, at their core, a power fantasy. Someone downtrodden is lifted up by their special ability to form an unbreakable bond with a powerful or even dangerous animal, finally earning admiration and respect from others. Sounds like something someone we know would enjoy, right?
A very common premise of a Horse Girl Book (which is different from just a Horse Book) is that a lonely, often socially isolated young girl encounters a horse that others consider difficult, and bonds with it. Very often The Girl is in some way different from others. She might be poor, she might be awkward, she might be new in town, or she might be some sort of stable outcast just because a lot of horse girls are a bit evil and prone to psychological mind games. It's very common for her to have to work hard to afford doing Horse Things while the others just coast along, which is looked down upon for Class Reasons. SOUNDS FAMILIAR? As she and the horse learn to work well together, her confidence grows, but so does the resentment of some of her fellow horse girls (often a rich or otherwise privileged one), who are jealous of her special abilities and quick learning curve. Sounds familiar!?
(I realised this got insanely long and so, I am putting a read more here, before we even get to Meng Yao and his Horse. My horse thoughts, my horse feelings... Anyway I swear there is some fic down there.)
Usually, no one except for maybe one mentor figure believe in them, so it's a huge surprise to everyone when the bond between The Girl and The Difficult Horse enables them to do amazing things, like winning an important competition or performing some kind of Feat that Saves The Day. Sometimes they, as a unit, are basically Lassie. This can open doors for The Girl to find acceptance and friendship among her peers, who suddenly aren't dicks anymore.
(In real life Horse Girls often have this weird and competitive homoerotic tension with their Sworn Rival? It's not really relevant here, just sharing. Very intense things goes on with horse girls.)
So I know this sounds insane, but hear me out:
The Nie gives me strong Horse Girl vibes. They have devoted their lives to their dangerous weapons, ignoring the advice of anyone who is like, "hey that seems unreasonably dangerous?" (I love them with all my soul but you can get very badly hurt doing horse stuff) because their souls are entwined and nothing can break their bond except the destruction of the blade itself, which will then destroy the blade's owner. The bond wasn't truly broken, it just took the user down with it, as one does. Horse girls are so obsessive, this cannot be understated, and the Nie's entire thing just screams Horse Girl to me. Baxia in particular is very Difficult Horse-coded. She is a famous, dangerous weapon, and only someone as powerful as Nie Mingjue can handle such a blade, he is so impressive! Look at him and his very impressive sword that haunts his every thought, probably! Extremely Horse Girl of them.
SO ANYWAY, now we actually get to the story: this is an AU where everything is basically the same, except the Nie are clearly Horse Girls (gender neutral). They are just extremely into horses, almost as much as they are into cultivating resentful energy that will one day consume them in a violent, bloody mess, which is honestly a hazard for real life horse girls too.
So, in the spirit of Take Your Fandom To Work day (my first job was horse) and my lifelong devotion to horses, I decided that hey, you know what Blorbo should have? A horse. Petting the soft, soft muzzle of a horse would be good for him. He needs to live through roughly five hundred horse book tropes.
And so, we finally get to a snippet of Meng Yao encountering a horse and deciding that horses? Pretty neat!
Behold:
"Anyway", said Nie Huaisang after catching one quick solitary breath after his tirade, "I think there is someone you should meet!"
Meng Yao, head politely bowed; always, always bowed under that invisible and almost impossibly heavy weight, did not ask "In the stables, Young Master?" but simply kept his smile in place and followed. "I see, Young Master."
Nie Huaisang sighed, needlessly dramatic in the manner of someone not well acquainted with the word no. "Huaisang, I keep telling you, you can call me Huaisang!"
"This one wouldn't dare be so improper, Young Master", Meng Yao not quite protested; he had been with the Nie, and bestowed with Nie Huaisang's attention for long enough to be used to this little song and dance. Nie Huaisang insisting on abandoning almost all pretence of social protocol, and Meng Yao carefully, carefully not protesting as much as he should. Nie Huaisang had assured him over and over that the Nie were different and that no one much cared for rigid etiquette, but Meng Yao knew bitterly well it wasn't true. He knew he wasn't lying; he had just never been in a position to notice or know.
Nie Huaisang sighed louder, and stopped and swung his left arm out in a gesture of behold! "Look up, at least. Here!"
Meng Yao looked up in the direction of Nie Huaisang's arm.
A very small horse looked back.
She was a pretty colour, a very dark and slightly reddish brown, but her mane looked unkempt compared to the other horses, somehow both coarser and thinner. Unlike the others, she stood out not due to beauty, but the ways she was different. Shorter legs, a short neck and a head that seemed slightly too big.
He decided not to think about what her teeth might look like. Being smaller, he knew very well, did not mean one couldn't be dangerous, and he had seen what an infected bite from a much smaller animal could do.
Meng Yao hadn't had much reason to interact with horses of any kind before coming to the Nie and couldn't claim to know much about their body language. Aside from ears tucked back and a raised hoof being a bad sign, he was more in the dark than he liked to be.
Still, he was under the distinct impression that this one looked a bit bored and vaguely unimpressed with the general state of the day.
It wasn't entirely off-putting.
"Here she is!" Nie Huaisang added with an unwarranted level of enthusiasm. "I think you'll like each other. You can pet her, I don't think she'll bite!"
Meng Yao briefly looked back at him. "Very reassuring. Young Master." But he did reach his hand out towards the little horse's muzzle, fingers carefully curled inwards as to not be easy to bite, just in case.
She carefully nibbled on them, as if searching for a treat.
Very briefly, Meng Yao wished he had one to give her.
"Her name is Cheerful Defiance In The Face Of Death", said Nie Huaisang proudly.
I look forward to the day when I don't get excited Everytime I see a red Ford Mustang. I look forward to the day when I hear you're name and I don't flinch, my heart stopping even when I know it isn't and will never be you. I look forward to the day when you no longer visit my dreams, when I don't hear your voice when I'm just on the edge of consciousness, when I don't walk by a high end clothing store and think that you'd have loved to wear that, when I don't think of you when I drink chai tea or sit in a Barnes & Nobles, when I can look at another person and not think... Not wish it was you.
