Drunken Gods
Percy Jackson x Dionysus!Reader Selina Beauregard x Clarisse La Rue
“I’d suffer hell if you’d tell me What you’d do to me tonight.” — Hozier, Dinner & Diatribes
You really should have known better than to host a party.
Not because you weren’t good at it—gods, no. With only three members in Cabin Twelve, parties were practically a sacred duty. You had the space, the music, the wine that definitely wasn’t approved by Chiron, and the kind of charm that made people feel seen even when they were three cups past sensible.
No, you should’ve known better because your father was Dionysus.
And Dionysus was pouting.
“One sip,” he said, hovering beside you like a sulking storm cloud in leopard print. “Just one.”
“No.”
“I’ll say you’re my favorite kid.”
“No.”
“I also won’t bust the party tonight.”
You raised a brow, unimpressed. “You won’t bust the party tonight because I lied and told Castor and Pollux that the new paints I got for their birthdays were from you and not me.”
He narrowed his eyes.
“…one drink?”
“NO.”
“Come on, please, sis,” Castor begged later, hands clasped dramatically.
“Let us come,” Pollux added, already grinning like he’d won.
The twins had perfected puppy eyes centuries ago.
You sighed. “Fine.”
“Yes!”
“We promise we’ll stay out of your hair,” Castor said solemnly.
“And not hang out with you,” Pollux added. “At all.”
You pinched the bridge of your nose. “I am going to regret this, aren’t I?”
They were already gone.
The party bloomed the way all good Dionysian gatherings did—music spilling into the night, laughter tangling with fairy lights, the air buzzing with something just this side of madness.
You moved through it with ease, greeting people, refilling cups, keeping one careful eye on everything. Madness was your father’s domain—not yours. You wanted people to have fun, not lose themselves in it.
Across the room, you spotted your dear friend staring. It was a habit she’d picked up recently.
You glided over, resting your head against her shoulder and blinking up at her dramatically.
“Clarisse,” you murmured, “stop staring and just go kiss her.”
Clarisse La Rue scowled. “You’re lucky we’re friends.”
“And stop pouting,” you added sweetly. “It doesn’t look good on you.”
She huffed, jaw set stubbornly—right until Selina Beauregard glanced over and smiled. Then Clarisse folded like paper.
You grinned.
Young love.
It was later—too many drinks later—when things shifted.
You noticed it the way you always did: a tone too sharp, a laugh too forced. An Ares kid had backed a girl toward the wall, his voice low and ugly in a way that made your skin crawl.
You stepped in without thinking.
Your fingers dug into his shoulder as you shoved him back—not hard. You weren’t a fighter. You didn’t need to be.
“Hey,” you said lightly, voice deceptively calm. “Is everything okay over here?”
The girl scrambled away the second his attention snapped to you.
“We were just talking,” he snapped.
“Talking?” You tilted your head, your smile sharpening into something dangerous. “Wow. Is that what you call whatever that was?”
You gestured dramatically to the empty space where the girl had been standing.
Maybe rage-baiting really was in your blood.
His hand went for your throat.
The world lurched.
Someone gasped. The music stuttered, then died. Lights flashed. No one moved.
Wow, you thought hazily. Not a great host if no one comes to your aid.
Then—
Chaos.
The weight vanished. You hit the floor hard, coughing, vision swimming. Shouting. A fist connecting. A very familiar voice yelling.
When you looked up—
Percy fucking Jackson.
You knew of him, of course. Everyone did. Hero. Savior. Seaweed Brain extraordinaire.
You just never expected him to be your knight.
Or you know at a party at all
The Ares kid staggered away under Percy’s fury and Clarisse’s lethal glare. Slowly, the party breathed back to life.
Percy turned to you, suddenly awkward. “You okay?”
You stood, brushing off your clothes. “You know, Jackson, with everything going on, I figured you’d be sleeping or maybe taking a night off . Not rescuing me like some knight in shining armor.”
He rubbed the back of his neck. “Well… unless you were about to fight back, I wasn’t gonna leave you there.”
You smiled softly. “Sometimes making a statement is better than violence.”
“And what statement was that?” he asked. “Letting him manhandle you?”
“That everyone saw him be an ass,” you said calmly. “And if they didn’t, they’ll hear about it by breakfast. Public shaming is very effective.”
You stepped closer. “Now, my knight… how can I ever repay you?”
“You don’t have to—”
You rose onto your toes and kissed his cheek.
Percy went redder than Tartarus.
“Well,” you said lightly, “every valiant knight deserves at least a kiss.”
For a moment, the world felt quiet between you.
Then you held out your hand.
“The knight is still young,” you teased. “Dance with a girl, Percy Jackson.”
The music softened. You pulled him to the edge of the room, away from the noise. His hand hovered, unsure, before settling at your waist. You swayed together, slow and easy, laughter low between you.
Magic hummed in the air—not wild, not dangerous.
Just warm.
When the song ended, you stepped back, smiling.
“See you later, Seaweed Brain.”
Percy watched you disappear into the lights, heart pounding, already certain—
He’d be coming back.
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Hope you enjoyed trying to force myself into writing every day again so nothing's going to be in order! Also I am the top percy beth shipper I just got blessed with this idea!
