What were these old timey jiggly machines and were they supposed to do?
Around the mid 19th century a popular medical theory was the idea that massage was good for health as it strengthened muscles through "passive exercise" and flushed the body of toxins. At the time Europe and North America was undergoing the Industrial Revolution, and there were many inventors who sought to invent new technologies to treat illness and care for patients. One of the pioneers of "mechanotherapy" was a Swedish physician named Dr. Gustav Zander, who invented series of exercise and health machines between 1850 and the turn of the century. Many of these machines actually were quite brilliant and would be the forefathers of modern exercise and weightlifting machines common in gyms today.
Among his many inventions were mechanical belt vibrating machines that were to take the place of human hands for delivering massages to patients.
Dr. Zander intended his belt vibrators to be used for patients who were badly crippled, injured, paralyzed, or bed bound in order to maintain muscle tone and prevent muscle atrophy. However around the early 20th century medical and fitness quacks began to invent and patent their own machines claiming that they could either cure any disease or that they could spot reduce fat and build muscle. They especially became popular as a muscle building and fat removing machine due to the allure of being able "exercise" without actually having to exercise. Many companies who manufactured these machines marketed to this allure.
The main theory behind these machines, or at least the main theory marketed by exercise belt manufacturers was that the vibration caused by the machine would physically breakdown fat and flush it out of the body. Thus loop the belt around your waist and it would break down that beer belly giving you a toned core. Loop it around your chest and it will reduce those man boobs. Loop it around your bum and it will reduce your fat bum giving you a muscular bum. This of course is all a load of humbuggery, and at best all the these machines did was make people look silly in the gym.
Regardless of their effectiveness, these vibrating belt exercise machines skyrocketed in popularity, especially the 1920's with increased access to electricity and an unprecedented boom in wealth. They could be found in every gym, health spa, and even in people's homes. Popularity declined during the Great Depression and World War II as declining wealth during the depression and lack of resources during the war stunted production and availability. They made a comeback in the 1950's and maintained some popularity into the 1960's. By 1970 they finally died out and never came back into popularity again.
Ha! Just kidding. While old timey belt vibrating belt exercise machines have gone extinct, today in the Year of our Lord 2022 there are a wide variety of vibrating and electro-muscle stimulating machines which claim to be able to turn your flabby belly into six pack abs, give you bulging biceps, and a give you a firm butt all without any effort. The only difference are these devices are much smaller, much cheaper, and can be ordered with the click of a mouse. In our new digital age, what was once old timey humbuggery has merely evolved into modern day fuckery.

















