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When did River learn the Doctor's name and why is it important?

Moffat has recently questioned the validity of all of Doctor’s marriages. Including… the Doctor’s and River’s. The reason he questions this is because the Doctor didn’t tell River his name when they were married.

This irked me because, I for one think they are married, not to mention they think they are married. So I’ve been mulling this over ever since I read his comments. Why? It’s what I do best when I’ve been perturbed.

Here’s what I’ve come up with…

Flashback: The Library

Doctor: River, you know my name! There’s only one reason I would ever tell anyone my name.

Let’s Kill Hitler He, Rory, and Amy all find out that the Ponds’ friend Mels is in fact Melody/River. Only Mels doesn’t know she is River yet.

The whole episode (while her kiss is killing him) the Doctor tries to teach her how to be the River he knows she will be. Then just before he dies he tells her:

DOCTOR: Find her. Find River Song and tell her something from me. RIVER: Tell her what? (The Doctor whispers in her ear.)

What if that’s when he told her his name?

If he had already told her his name, then he wouldn’t have needed to tell her his name at their wedding.

What do you think? Are they married or not?