Apr 3, 2021
Upd8
It's 3am for me and my brain is being mean.
Saying I'm a Toxic, Manipulative little rat.
And that I'm like this because I want attention....
I swear I'm not. I don't want to be.
...
But what if I am? What if I am really am a horrible person?
I hate it. I hate it. I don't wanna be bad. I wanna make people happy.
And this constant venting is killing me.
I'm just so afraid.
#she was right#she was right.#she was right to be mad#she was right to say 'fuck you'#I'm horrible#I don't deserve them#I don’t deserve friends#I don't deserve anything but to be alone#I don't fucking deserve love#my heart deserves to be broken#again and again and again and again until I die from it#I did nothing and that's what made her hate me....it's what made him hate me too....#I do nothing...#I'm a fucking toy you pick up and throw away once you get bored#I'm sorry I'm not good enough#I'm not special#i'm not important#I'm a goddamn loser that deserves to be treated like trash#....#major vent#vent#delete later