#ice pirates

[tomoleary]

Steven Chorney — Ice Pirates Movie Original Poster Art (1984) Source

[nerds-yearbook]

Ice Pirates had a release date of March 16, 1984. It was originally intended be a serious sci fi movie penned by Krull writer Stanford Sherman with a 20 million budget. When a new budget was set at 8 million, Stewart Raffill rewrote it as a comedy. It is very loosely based on Jason and the Golden Fleece from mythology and pirate movies. It was one of the rare movies that warned of the dangers of Space Herpes. New studio head Frank Yablans had been accused of making it a difficult shoot. It has also been said the original ending had been cut without telling the director pryor to release. The film performed poorly, but has since has taken on a bit of a cult status. ("Ice Pirates", Sci Fi Movie Event)

[sandmandaddy69]

[petrichorca]

Stede and Ed hanging out in the snow on an ice ship. @y2jenn made this beautiful piece for @veeagainsttheday's and my post-apocalyptic ice piracy AU/climate change fic Runaway Effects. Go give Jenn some love because she's the best and I stare at this art all the time!! Also our fic is rated E for Explicit because, well, obviously they do more than just cuddle for warmth. ;)

[crafted-oubliette]

Ice Pirates: WTF Did I Just Watch?

You ever watch a movie and the entire time you're sitting there like "What the ever loving fuck am I watching?" Yeah...that was me here. I picked this movie up when I was at Movie Madness looking for pirate movies to watch for research about my (ever growing) Black Pearl post. This is not a pirate movie, but its also not not a pirate movie. It's a space movie, but it's also just a bad movie. A bad movie with some surprising names in it like Anjelica Huston (of Addams Family Fame), Ron Perlman (fuckable at any age), John Carradine (truly this is a mystery to me), and the one weird name I actually wasn't surprised by: Bruce Vilanch.

I am honestly not sure where to begin here. The costumes are weird and anachronistic to the nth degree. From Crusade Era costumes, to 1600s pirate garb, and early 1900s maid dresses. And that is just the anachronistic shit. There's also pearly white nylon/spandex skin-tight leotards with matching white hair wigs. And a trashcan with eyes and a tongue. This is not an acid trip, this is a real movie.

So the premise is that there's no water left in the universe except ice...somewhere? The movie said but I can't/refuse to remember. Our ragtag group of pirates has to go get that ice. And also save a king? And also saving him is time locked so if they don't go to the right coordinates they'll be stuck in a time loop forever. Also there is one, singular Space Herpe? Not herpes. Herpe.

Let me tell you: taking a 15 minute power nap during this film is not a good idea. Or maybe it is because the plot is all over the place. I don't actually know. You do you. What do I care?

Bruce Vilanch is very Bruce Vilanch. That's the only thing you can count on in this film. Angelica, why are you here, girl? You look good though...

This movie is fucking weird.

This movie was made at time when everyone was banking on space movies. So it has all these vibes from other things: Star Wars, Heavy Metal, the og Hitchhiker's show on BBC1, Conan/Hundra vibes, there's even a Mad Max scene. Really, it's just all over the place. It's one of those movies that makes you wonder just how much cocaine was involved here. Which to me is an entire sub genre of movies that includes the original Star Wars Trilogy, Witches of Eastwick, Tammy and the T Rex and oh so many more.

What the actual fuck did I watch? A bad movie that might have been made better if I was a fan of hallucinogens or hard drugs. 1/10. It's a wild ride. Ride it if you want but I'd just as soon recommend you skip it for a better bad movie.

On a side note, I haven't decided what I want my blog here to look like. Since I made a friend today, I'll post this now for them. This one's for you @grant-obrien-eating-an-apple .

[earlofgormenghast]

Best 80s sci-fi movie outlaw

Space Cowboy

Mercenary Lone Starr

Ice Pirate Jason

Fugitive James T Kirk

Voting ended onFeb 10, 2023

[throwbackmovie]

Uncredited Amazons in THE ICE PIRATES – 1984

[loveboatinsanity]