GETTING WASTED WITH LA SQUADRA
(THE DREAM)
Formaggio:
He’s sort of a stereotypical drunk. He’s pretty stupid.
He likes to make chit-chat with every single member, it doesn’t matter. whether or not what he’s talking about makes a lick of sense.
He talks about himself...a lot. especially to you. He likes to impress you.
He drinks the strongest thing he can find-if there’s moonshine-he’ll have that...gasoline? Maybe...
He’s done with by midnight, out fucking cold.
Pesci:
He doesn’t like drinking but Proscuitto sort of pressures him a bit. He insists it’ll help take a load off.
He sort of just sits in the corner and sips at whatever he’s given. He doesn’t really interact with anyone.
When he gets emotional he strictly confides in you and usually ends up crying.
He’s 100% a total marshmallow at this point. Anything and everything will make him upset.
He c r i e s as he contemplates his life choices.
Proscuito:
He’s double time asshole. He treats everyone pretty shitty if you try to talk to him. He’s only friendly with you and Pesci.
He goes back and forth between having fun and hating himself a lot of the time.
He likes to think he’s good at composing himself but he fucking sucks at it.
Him and Formaggio always battle it out and end up hitting each other.
Just...tell him to leave you alone...he’ll pass out on pure vodka.
Melone:
Big bad flirt. He really wants you to know how beautiful you are and that he’d love to make you his.
He always wants you to sit next to him or on his lap. He gets super touchy feely and is really eager to makeout with you or Giaccio.
He never wants to have ANYTHING to do with Formaggio or Proscuito.
He tries to approach Risotto sometimes, but always ends up backing off when he revieves any sort of look. He just wants to talk...
Tell him he’s pretty just like his fancy lady drinks...he might cry a little bit.
Ghiaccio:
He’s very upset. The world is against him and always has been.
Angry boy. He doesn’t want you to talk to him or look at him.
But surprise surprise, he actually wants your love and attention, give it to him, he needs it.
He likes his alchohol to be freezing cold. So he likes fruity ice cold vodka. His favorite is most definitely cranberry.
Him and Melone just want to actually make love and if you want to join that’s totally fine.
Illuso:
He’s the most relaxed. He’s actually having a good time. He knows how to get fucked up without ruining his night.
If you sit next to him, it’ll take a moment for him to actually notice you’re there.
He’s actually kind of sweet? He talks sort of calm and is just content. It’s almost scary.
If any of the others try to talk to him, he’ll just pretend they aren’t even there, sipping at his Sangria through a bendy straw.
He’s the only one that can actually converse with Risotto.
Risotto Nero:
Babysitter #1- He’s got it under sontrol...right?
He opens up a little bit if you try to dig deep, who knows, maybe you’ll learn a thing or two about him.
He’ll space out and start staring at you. He won’t mean to. He’s just sort of tired of moving his eyes around. You’re the nicest looking thing around anyway.
He drinks Brandy straight out of the bottle because why not buy something expensive and then waste it in one night?
He’ll pass out at his desk most likely. You lay a blanket over him.
Gilato and Sorbet:
They’re making out on the couch.
Shots, shots, shots...
Don’t disturb the busy bees or they will actually hiss at you.
Pesci is very uncomfortable.
Please help Pesci.
