#incorrect heated rivalry

[military-newsboys]

Ilya: I want to wake up with you every day for the rest of our lives Shane: I wake up at 4:30 am Ilya: I want to see you at some point every day for the rest of our lives

[consumer-of-books]

Shane Hollander is a jock, Shane Hollander does not wear anything but athletic wear, Shane Hollander does not have a skincare routine.

Shane Hollander routinely uses sunscreen(for safety against skin cancer) and washes his face with a sensitive skin friendly soap in the shower. He uses the same bar for his entire body.

Beyond that his smooth skin is entirely coincidental. Ilya is very jealous of this. Ilya wears hair products, styles himself meticulously and has tried multiple skincare routines. None of which are giving him the supple skin he desires.

The first time Ilya goes to Shane's real apartment and not the sex condo he is outraged by the number of unused samples of skincare products, mostly because these brands are choosing to work with Shane when he knows for a fact that Shane does nothing to properly take care of his skin.

Shane's bathroom sink is barren.

Shane *enters Ilya's bathroom*: why do you have so much clutter in here

Ilya *outraged*: is not clutter Hollander we did not all climb out of womb and become world's prettiest man by accident

Shane *having no filter*: why do you bother with it if it doesn't work?

Ilya: 😭

[snap-crackle-cunt]

ilya: no u don't understand we CAN'T use a condom they're bad for the environment cause single use plastic i HAVE to fuck u raw u don't understand

[fivedrinksamy]

Hayden: Rozanov, have you ever won an argument against Shane?

Ilya: we never argue. He starts speaking French and I shut up.

[ismickeyadopted]

random twitter posts x Heated Rivalry part 1/?

[iamharryhale]

Ilya: *flirting with Shane*

Shane: *actually flirts back*

Ilya:

Shane:

Ilya:

Shane: You’re not going to say anything?

Ilya: I do not know. Did not think I’d get this far.

[hollanov-ottawa-fam]

Ilya bursts into the locker room: Who want to make $500!?

(Haas, Lapointe and Young look up from their stalls)

Luca: How?

Ilya: I need someone to take fall.

Shane (from the rink): Oh, my god...

Lapointe: What did you do?

Ilya: Can not tell, yes or no, no questions.

Shane: Oh, my GOD.

Young: Make it a $1000

Ilya: Done-

Shane: OH MY GOD

Ilya (whispering): You are good rookie.

Ilya, dragging Young by his jersey collar: да! (yes) I got him дорогой (Dorogoy/dear), do not worry!

[spiderblog-mcu]

Ilya: we will play mermaids in the pool yes?

Shane: don’t you mean mermen?

Ilya: No. I want to be mermaid with majestic hair and fat rack.