#incorrect retj

[benvoolioo]

Romeo: has anyone ever told you that you're beautiful?

Juliet: oh no sir, today is my first day out of doors and Mama forbade mirrors in the house lest we fall victim to vanity.

Romeo: I can't tell if you're joking or not.

[incorrect-tyvolio-quotes]

Benvolio: I’m kind of crushing on someone, but I’m worried about telling you who it is, because you’re not going to like it

Lady Montague: just rip the bandage off

Benvolio: it's Tybalt

Lady Montague: put the bandage back on

[elzza]

Montagues: We fought with him

Mercutio: Me? I died for him

Benvolio: Me? I trusted him

Juliet: Me? I loved him

Romeo: And me? I'm the damn fool that killed him

Mercutio: ...

Mercutio: What the fuck Romeo

[drawn-and-talk-of-peace]

Nurse: Do you know where I can find Romeo Montague?

Mercutio: No, but his friends are total assholes.

Nurse: How do you know that?

Benvolio: We're his friends.

[lehetsz-kiraly]

Benvolio: So, I went to the Town Hall to propose my new green plan, y'know? Just a couple more rubbish and recycling bins, make sure people put their stuff in the right spot. And Tybalt goes, "Hah, that'll make it easy to dispose of Verona's trash," and now we're not even allowed a recycling bin! Way to go green, Tybalt!

[benvoolioo]

Tybalt: *screams*

Mercutio: *screams louder to assert dominance*

Romeo: should we stop them?

Benvolio: no, I want to see who wins.

[incorrect-tyvolio-quotes]

Tybalt: hey what's the name of that guy who lives two doors down?

Benvolio: his dogs names are Antonio and Stella

Tybalt: that's not what I asked

Benvolio: that's the information I have

[benvoolioo]

Mercutio: You say every woman is the woman of your dreams.

Romeo: I have a lot of dreams! And most of them are about women! Apart from the one where I have the body of a crab...