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The Arrangement - Finan x Reader Part 1

A/N: Yep, you are seeing this correctly. I have come back out of my cave (and stepped away from my original work I'm working on) and I've written a Finan fic! While set in The Last Kingdom world, I suppose it could also be seen as an AU. I wrote 23k words! But that's too much for everyone to read so I'm splitting it into 3 parts. I said I wasn't going to do this again (my last TLK one didn't do as well) and I thought I was done but... Well, I'm here haha I'm still around, reading fics and all that but it's been a while since I've written anything so please be kind to me 😅 I've read through as much as I can so I apologise for spelling mistakes!

Warnings: angst, jealousy, Finan (he's an idiot in one part), loneliness, arranged marriage, sexual tension, brief moment of reader and Finan with other people (there's no cheating as such, I don't want to give the story away when you're reading these warnings)

The Last Kingdom Masterlist

The sky was dark and stormy, as though it had clashed nicely with your mood at that moment. It was full of grey clouds, rumbling thunder as though Thor was protesting this union too and the drops of rain were big and heavy as they splashed on the ground. You stood there stoically, not saying anything, not blinking, not even looking at anything other than the tree that swayed in the wind just beyond his shoulder.

The man, the Prince you'd been told, was standing there in the same way; except his hands were clenched at his sides. You would never admit that he was handsome even though he was; dark hair, dark eyes and a dark beard. There was scars on his strong, muscular arms, rings on his fingers and a cross that lay on his green linen shirt clad chest.

He hadn't dressed for the occasion and you'd fought tooth and nail with your family but they still put you in a white linen dress with flowers in hair. They'd trussed you up as though this was a real union, as though this was being done for love.

When in reality, it was for fucking peace.

A transaction.

There was finally peace between Christians and Danes. Free from the fighting and the raiding, a peace that meant they had land to live on here, a place where they could build their families and homes but of course, of course that meant there had to be a union between two of you. A Christian Prince and a Danish Princess.

Your family jumped at the chance, delighted in being the first to get to the High King Alfred, the first to offer you up. A Dane.

And then came your betrothed. The one stood in front of you now. Finan, they said his name was and he didn't look happy at the prospect. Didn't look happy at marrying you and who could blame him? He was Uhtred's adopted brother, not legally, but they called each other that. You weren't sure how that made him a Prince, but you could try and get answers later.

“This union is sanctified under God and under the promise of peace and unity for days to come.”

The priest in front of you was all monotone and grating, talking about God as though you believed in him, as though he was now your God to worship.

The people behind Finan looked uncomfortable at this union too, the men were looking anywhere but at the pair of you, the few women there were smiling, as though it had been forced on them to do so. There was another woman standing to the side; dark hair and stunning green eyes who was glaring at you, glaring in a way that should have made your heart stop where you stood but it didn't.

That would be up to your Gods.

“Finan, for peace, for unity, do you take Y/N to be your wife?”

“Yeah, I do.”

He sighed when he said it, resigned to his fate and he rubbed a hand over his face.

It was the first time you'd heard him talk and you were taken aback by the thick Irish accent that fell from his lips.

It was nice.

Not that you would admit that.

“Y/N, for peace, for unity, do you take Finan to be your husband?”

No no no no.

No!

You wanted to shout those words into the forest, into the abyss, to the Gods and Goddesses so they'd hear your pleas and just take you away from everything.

Finan watched you as you warred in your own head with your decision and you turned to your family, the stern look from your parents brokered no argument; you were doing this. Your sister gave you a small smile, her face lighting up in encouragement.

It would have been easier if it had been her.

But they had other plans for her, other people to marry her off too. She had more suitors than you, more men willing to bargain for her and it was because of how beautiful and bright she was that your family was holding out for the right one.

Not for you though. They couldn't wait to get you off their hands. You weren't bright or beautiful, you didn't have many men, Dane or otherwise vying for your affection. You'd had lovers but nothing that lasted, no one saw you, no one truly wanted you. They wanted sway with your family, they wanted notoriety but…

“Y/N?”

Shaking your head, you saw the concerned look on the women from Finan’s found family, saw the look of concern on Finan’s face and you thought, that maybe, just maybe, you could have a place here.

“Yeah. Fine.” You croaked out, not having used your voice after you'd stopped screaming and crying, after your mother had slapped you and your father had been rough with you.

“Then, under the unity of God, our King of the North Uhtred and our sovereign High King Alfred, I pronounce you husband and wife.”

There was a smattering of applause and you weren't quite sure what to do now. A normal wedding, there would be kissing and laughter and cheering but this wasn't a normal wedding.

You nodded at Finan, not quite meeting his eye and you walked to your family, telling them it was time to go back home.

“What do you think you're doing?” Your mother said through a strained smile as your father spoke with Alfred and Uhtred.

“Coming home with you.”

“You're staying here, in Bebbanburg. It's your home now.”

“With people who don't like me?” You asked.

“Listen here,” your mother grabbed your arm, pulling you towards her. To the others, it would look as though it was a friendly gesture but you knew otherwise, “this union is the best we could hope for. Because who else would want you? We tried with the men in our camp, in our village and no one wanted you, but this arrangement is the best thing to happen for you. So you go in there, you smile and try to look the part to keep this peace steady. And if you find anything while there to help our cause, then so be it.”

Of course, ‘the cause’, your father wanted more land, more wealth. He wanted Wessex and then Bebbanburg and then the whole of England. He wasn't going to stop at some measly farm on some land that nobody wanted. He was a King back home, but here, he was nobody. And he hated that.

“Do you understand me?”

“Yes.”

“Then go to your husband and make nice.”

She let you go, her nails had dug into your flesh, bringing blood to the surface and you placed your hand over the top so the others wouldn't see as you slowly made your way over to where your new husband stood.

You stood to the side, standing there awkwardly, not knowing where you belonged.

A pretty red haired woman in a lavender dress and a stunning blonde woman came over to you, holding your hands and you hoped they didn't see the blood that had seeped into the sleeve of your dress.

“I'm Eadith and this is my wife, Ingrith. Well, I say wife, we can't officially be married but Uhtred has given us a blessing, and so has Abbess Hild so it's as good as one. Sorry, I'm blabbering. We're going to help you adjust to life in Bebbanburg.”

“I… Thank you?”

“Is that a question?” Ingrith laughed and then she glanced down at your arm. “Have you got an injury?”

“I, uh, no, it's just something I do when I'm nervous.”

“Are you okay?” Eadith asked and before you had a chance to reply, your father came over, giving you stiff hug that felt more like a threat than a loving moment. Your sister, Enne, was the only one who genuinely hugged you and you gave her a smile before she walked off.

You noticed the guys, including your husband, watched as she walked away and your throat felt dry as you tried to swallow.

Of course they'd watch her.

She was sunshine and you were rain clouds.

“The journey won't take too long. You can ride?” Eadith asked and you nodded, feeling as though all life was draining from you.

“Are we okay here?” Uhtred asked and the ladies turned to him, smiling and talking but you just nodded at him again, your voice not wanting to come to the surface.

“Y/N? Are you ready?”

You still didn't speak, just gave a short nod and he frowned at you.

You'd seen Uhtred before, had spoken to him in the camps as you knew Brida and his brother and you could see the cogs turning in his head as to why you were acting this way.

Finan came up to his side and he motioned to a horse that had been brought over, standing next to his and you walked over to it, handing flowers to Ingrith as you did so, before pulling up your dress and sitting astride the horse.

“Have you seen Bebbanburg before?” Finan asked once he'd jumped on his own horse and you could see he was trying, trying to make this as easy as possible.

Shaking your head, you faced forward, waiting for the rest of them to lead the way.

You didn't speak to Finan again or the group for the rest of the journey.

**

“This is home. I'll show you where you'll be staying with me.”

“With you?”

“Ah, so she does speak! We're married, where are you supposed to stay?”

“Another room?” You asked and Finan shrugged.

“I can put you up in another room if you wish.”

“I… I don't know. I don't really know what to do here.”

“Neither do I. Well, I do, but I was a lot younger. In a different life. Oh, here. I kept a cupboard empty here so you can put all your stuff in… there's only one bed but, we can do a pillow wall or… I can sleep in another room.”

“A pillow wall is fine. This is your area, I won't throw you out.”

Finan smiled and you found that you liked the smile, liked how it showed the laughter lines on his face, as though he'd had many years of jokes and happy times since being here.

You hoped that maybe, you'd get laughter lines too, but it had been a long time since you'd really laughed.

“We'll be eating soon, in the big hall. All of us go there so feel free to join us later.”

You went to speak but the door knocked and Finan answered, the dark haired female you'd seen earlier was standing there, looking as though she'd been crying. Whatever was going on, you were completely ignored as Finan reached out to brush the tears away from her cheeks. Even with tears streaming down her face, she still managed to look beautiful. You tried not to cry, ever since your mother had told you that you looked grotesque when you cried, you kept everything bottled up.

Maybe that's why you were one tiny thing away from blowing up. You could feel it bubbling under the surface but it had yet to erupt.

You stood there awkwardly, waiting for their conversation to stop but Finan left the room, pulling the door a little and you went to listen to what they were saying.

“I'm finding this too hard, Finan.”

“I know, I know Ethne, but there is nothing that can be done…”

“I was meant to be your wife! Me! Not some heathen bitch!”

“Keep your voice down!”

“No, I won't. Finan, can't you get out of this? Give her to Osferth and then you and I can be together.” you heard her cry.

“I’m a Prince, Osferth is a bastard, it wouldn't work. Ethne, just please, go and get cleaned up and I'll come see you later.”

“Fine. But promise me, promise me you won't fall in love with her or tell her she's beautiful and everything to you. Promise me Finan.”

It was silent for a while and you swallowed, your throat dry and scratchy. You wondered what was going on out there, wondered why it was so silent and then you heard Ethne small voice whisper; “Finan?”

“Yeah, yeah I promise.” His voice was small but you heard it anyway. You walked away from the door, hand to your chest as you realised what your family had done, what they had torn apart. Of course he'd have a lover, of course there would be someone else, with you, there always was but when he was talking to you, when he laughed, you were hoping, just a tiny bit of hope, that there could have been something.

That he would see you. The real you.

But there was none of that hope now.

You left the room Finan had shown you, hoping you'd find a washroom so you could get out of these ridiculous clothes. You found a pair of trousers and a linen top, remnants of your life back home and when you found what you were looking for, you shut and locked the door behind you.

There was a mirror in the bathroom and you stripped your dress off, throwing the flower crown to the floor and you looked at your features, looked at the flaws. The scars and bruises, the stretch marks on your hips from where you'd blossomed out as a young girl, your stomach and breasts, scrutinizing every little part of you until you had had enough. Pulling on your trousers and shirt, you kicked your doomed wedding dress into the corner of the room, promising that you'd burn it tomorrow and you sat down on the floor, bringing up your legs and resting your head on your knees.

You did hear Finan’s voice a little later, a soft knock on the door but you remained where you were, sitting on the floor. You heard others knock too, even Uhtred's voice came through the door but you ignored them all.

You didn't know how to do any of this; how to have conversations and how to be yourself and interact because your family had never really invited you to things. You sat in the kitchens with the staff while they were in the grand hall, hosting parties and dinners. So to go to the hall here, to be around others and especially Finan’s love, was like a red hot poker going through your chest.

You knew this wasn't a love match, but part of you hoped that it could turn into something.

But there was no chance of that now.

How long you'd been in the washroom, you didn't know but you woke up to a sore back and fuzzy head and it took you a moment to realise where you were before the events of yesterday came back. You cringed at where you'd spent your wedding night, knowing full well that they would probably have had the priests waiting to make sure Finan and you consummated the marriage. Ugh, yuck. The priests were perverts and you cursed yourself for marrying one of those Christians.

He probably only had sex on Sabbath days and probably liked it so boring and missionary, you'd never have a decent orgasm again.

You got up and got washed and dressed, wearing one of the dresses you'd bundled into the trunk and you made your way down to the hall once you looked as decent as you could. You could already hear laughter and loud voices and you winced at having to walk in, at having to hear all the laughter die.

“Are you just going to stand here?”

Turning, you saw Ingrith, a smile on her face and you shook your head at being caught lingering.

“I'll grab some food from the kitchen and sit back in my room.”

“No, you're not!” Ingrith smiled, grabbing a hold of your arm and walking you straight in. You waited for the laughter to stop, for everyone to turn your way but nothing happened.

Eadith stood up, giving Ingrith a kiss on the cheek and hugging you, your hand awkwardly patting her back and she pulled you down to sit next to them, piling you plate with food.

“You finally show.” Uhtred said, all eyes on you and you looked away from them all. “You know, when I met you before, you were never like this. Maybe our tryst left you more speechless than I thought.”

“It did nothing of the sort, you pig.” You shot back and you saw the mirth in his eyes as he took a sip of his drink.

“You've slept with Uhtred?!” Eadith shouted and you looked over at her.

“As I'm sure many other women have.”

“When was this?” Finan’s voice stopped all others asking questions.

“A while ago. He came to see my family, we were drunk and…”

“I rocked her world.” Uhtred grinned.

“You were okay. For an old man.” You shot him a look and he had the gall to look outraged.

“There's a few years between us!”

“If you say so.”

You picked at the food on your plate, devouring the cheese and warm bread that made your taste buds burst in delight.

“You slept with Uhtred?” Finan asked, disbelief in his voice.

“I didn't take her dignity, Finan.”

“Uhtred!” You snapped, looking at him.

“What?!”

“I've heard of your customs,” you told him, “shouldn't you have a pure bride? Why didn't you pursue Enne for this role anyway?”

“You and Uhtred?” Finan asked again and you looked over at your new husband.

“Are you just going to repeat the question in different ways, dear husband? Or are you really that shocked that a man of Uhtred's stature could want me?”

“What's that meant to mean?”

Before you had a chance to answer, the door opened and in walked Ethne, her petite figure dressed in a stunning deep blue dress that was low on her front. She had bare arms with a single bracelet on her wrist and a black belt was tied around her waist. She was dressed like a goddess and you weren't quite sure where to look at this display. She sat down closely next to Finan, her arm going under his and you looked away as she smiled up at him.

“Ethne, glad you could join us.” Uhtred said but you noticed a lack of warmth in his tone.

“I slept in, I had a busy night.” She replied, and you could hear the smug tone in her voice.

“Wait, what did you mean by what you said?” Finan asked you, ignoring Ethne beside him.

“What was said?” She asked.

“It was nothing.” You replied to her, wanting to break the ice, “I’m Y/N, it's nice to meet you.” You said, waiting for her to introduce herself but she just sneered at you, taking you in.

“I don't talk to heathen whores.”

“You just spoke. So, that's a lie.” You said, taking a sip of your drink.

“How dare you speak back to me!”

“I can talk how I like. You said you don't speak to ‘heathen whores’ but you spoke to me. And you spoke to Uhtred who is one of the biggest ones in this room.”

The man beside you choked on his drink, the other man in monk robes laughed into his drink, while Finan bit his lip to stop the laugh.

“You cannot talk about the King in that way!”

“He's been inside me so I can talk about him however I like.”

Eadith and Ingrith let out the biggest laughs ever beside you, the monk snorting out his drink as he tried to hold it in.

“And this is your wife? She's slept with your brother, she's insulted me by daring to talk to me and she's… She's…”

“She's what? Please enlighten the table, Ethne.” Uhtred said, daring her to talk.

“She's an absolute pig of a woman who dares to even think she could belong here, at this table and at Finan’s side when we all know she's just disgusting with her heathen ways and ugly dresses to match that ugly face of hers. You won't last here.”

The room was silent and Finan stood up from the table, grabbing Ethne’s arm and dragging her out of the room as she continued shouting.

“Don't listen to her, she's just jealous.” Ingrith said but you waved her off.

“She speaks the truth. It's okay.”

The door opened again and Finan walked in, anger on his face before he sat back down and took a long drink from his cup.

“I'm sorry about what she said. She's not in a good place.”

“There's nothing to apologise for when someone speaks the truth. I'm going to take a walk, if that’s okay?” You aimed the question at Uhtred, ignoring the questioning looks coming from Finan and the others.

“You can go wherever you wish, you aren't confined inside. Sihtric, Osferth, go with her.”

“I don't need minders.”

“I'll go with you,” Finan stood up and you wished Eadith and Ingrith had been the ones to suggest they go with you, “You're my wife, I should be the one to show you around.”

You hesitated but he didn't give you time to decline as he took your arm, pulling you to the door and to the outside. It was cold, with the wind hammering around corners but Finan looked used to it while you shivered.

“So, what's there to do in Bebbanburg?”

“What did you mean?” He asked, stopping you by a wall that overlooked the sea, the jagged cliffs below.

“I don't know what you mean.”

“Y/N, tell me.”

You didn't speak, turned to lean on the wall and you closed your eyes, soaking in the sea breeze.

“Y/N, please.”

“We've known each other for less than a day, I'm not going to open up to someone I barely know. We know what type of marriage this is; it's not a love match or something that could become one. It's a transaction. You don't need to know everything about me and I don't need to know everything about you.”

“What a fun marriage this will be.” He replied sarcastically and you turned to him, eyebrows raised.

“What did you expect? I didn't want this and you certainly didn't want this if your talk with Ethne was anything to go by last night. I'm sorry I came between you and your love, I'm sorry you drew the short straw for this transaction, but nothing is going to happen with us. We could be friends I suppose. Thank you for showing me from the door to this wall but I'd like to be alone if that's okay?” You told him, dismissing him.

Finan stood there for a while, watching you and then watching the sea before he gave up once he realised you weren't going to say anything else to him. Sighing, he walked away, brushing his hands through his hair as he made his way back into the hall.

**

“Come on, you are leaving this room!” Ingrith said, pulling on your arm while Eadith shoved you from behind. Once the door was shut and locked, they looked at you triumphantly, Eadith putting the key down the front of her dress.

“I will go down there and get the key, you know that right?”

“Stop flirting with me in front of my wife! The scandal! Look, you've been moping around in that room for two weeks, we are taking you out of here.”

“Where to? Are you going to take me to the beach and leave me to swim away? Or sell me to some market stall holder for a fair price?”

“Stop with the dramatics! Is it so hard to believe that we actually want to spend time with you and to become your friends?” Ingrith asked, one eyebrow raised as she looked at you.

“Sort of.” You grumbled and she took your arm on the left while Eadith took your right. They marched you out of the doors and into the cold air, the breeze from the sea making the hair on your arms stand on end, even under a layer of clothing.

“How are you unaffected by this cold?”

“You come from over the sea, isn't it colder there?”

“I'm used to that. But this… after being in Wessex this is just torture.”

They laughed, pulling you down a stretch of path before you started to hear grunting.

“Uhhh, I'm not sure what your idea of fun is but…”

Eadith laughed as you all walked around the corner, seeing the man training. Well, men and women.

Uhtred was walking around and telling people where they should plant their feet, where they should hit and duck while occasionally stepping in and showing people. The monk, Osferth, was busy with another in a priest uniform, while Sihtric was with a young man who looked the image of him. Uhtred then went and stood to talk to a young woman, who had his looks but you couldn't be sure if that was his daughter or not. You'd heard about her, about her love affair with Sigtryggr, a distant relative of yours. If that was her, then he was a lucky man. She looked fierce and formidable, every inch a warrior Queen he deserved.

And then there was Finan, your husband and if that wasn't a sight to behold, you weren't sure what was. Nothing should have prepared you for his muscular arms and shoulders rippling as he fought someone in the training ring. You'd seen them before on your wedding day but seeing them in action, seeing the strength… If you were that type of woman, then your knees would go weak and you'd lick your lips at the sight.

But you weren't…

No, that definitely was you licking your lips because he looked like one of your Gods come to life.

And then you wondered just how much strength and stamina he truly had.

“Someone is staring very intently at their husband.” Eadith whispered and you swallowed, trying to get some moisture to your patched throat.

“They call him Finan the Agile, you know.” Ingrith smiled and that really did nothing to temper the thoughts in your head.

“Y/N! Have you come to join us!” Osferth shouted and you saw Finan stumble when he heard your name, his eyes locking on yours and you swear he could probably feel your cheeks heating from that distance away. Finan did some manoeuvre, making his way over to where you were standing in a mesmerised state of dirty thoughts.

“Are you coming to train?” He asked, his Irish accent even deeper and rougher and there was sweat on his brow that made him look just…

Would he push you away in horror and disgust if you just jumped him there and then?

“Y/N? You okay?” There was a smirk in his voice and you shook yourself out of your stupor, turning to the two giggling women behind you.

“Yeah, I'm fine. I, yes, I will join you.”

“Great. Osferth, grab Y/N a training sword and shield!” Finan shouted, standing closer to you as he looked at Osferth. He really didn't need to stand that close to you because the smell of just man overcame your senses. You'd never really been a fan of the smell of pure masculine man that was covered in sweat from training, choosing instead for earthy smells, but by the Gods and Goddesses and all other holy entities you could easily be persuaded to change your mind because of this man in front of you.

“Anyone you want to train with?” He asked, his voice husky and you had to stop yourself from moaning aloud.

“They call you Finan the Agile don't they? Let's see how you fight.”

You'd turned your head so your faces were even closer together and you could see the depth of his eyes and you could spend a lifetime counting the hairs in his beard if it meant his mischievous eyes and full lips that were turned up in a smile kept looking at you like that.

“Are you sure you can handle me?”

“Bring it on, big guy.”

Finan grinned, walking to the centre of the training ring. Uhtred knew you could fight, had seen and trained with you when he came to see your family but Finan didn't know, and he stood to the side, arms folded as he smirked at you.

“Show my daughter how a Dane truly fights, Y/N!” Uhtred shouted and Finan turned to him and then you in a questioning gaze. Taking that as your opportunity, you sliced out with the training sword and Finan only just managed to duck, knocking yours out of the way. He had an incredulous look on his face and then he snapped out of it, both of you dancing between blocking and attacking. Finan went to knock your legs out from under you but you managed to jump out of the way before aiming the training sword at his head which he managed to block.

Again.

You knew what you were going to do and you let him knock you down, feigning surprise that he managed to do so. When he reached a hand down to help you up, you yanked with all your strength, making him topple before you kicked out at his legs. You moved quickly, your knee on his sword arm, your arm over his throat as you aimed the training sword at his side.

“What the…”

“I taught her that trick!” Uhtred shouted and you smiled at Finan lay underneath you and he conceded.

Leaning back, you let go of your hold and you sat there for a moment, your hips close together and you felt him… Felt that he had grown hard.

For you.

He cocked an eyebrow at you and smirked at you as he shifted, a thousand electric currents seeming to zip through your body at that touch.

“Are you concealing any other weapons?” you whispered to him.

“Glad you think it could be considered a weapon.” He said, voice husky and low.

You stretched your back, arching it slightly and his eyes flared, his hands falling onto your hips and you both stared at each other, knowing there were people around, knowing they were probably talking amongst themselves but you couldn't stop looking at him.

“Finan! Oh my god, Finan!”

Both of you looked up, seeing Ethne standing to the side looking royally pissed off and Finan grunted, holding tightly onto your hips as he flipped you off him, holding you briefly before he got up and made his way over to where she was, leaving you lay there in the dusty floor.

“I don't care! You promised me, Finan!” You heard Ethne shout and you took a few breaths before a hand came in front of you and you looked up at Sihtric.

“Thank you.”

“You fought well. You'll have to teach my son some of those tricks.”

He pointed to a miniature version of himself, the boy was at least eighteen, if slightly older, pride on his face as he looked at his father.

“Of course. It would be an honour. And don't listen to Uhtred, he didn't teach me any of those tricks!”

“She's disgusting, Finan! How can you even…”

“Ethne, that's enough!” Uhtred shouted, eyes glaring at the petite woman. Finan didn't say anything to quell her anger and he didn't say anything regarding what she said about you. Which just made what happened very confusing.

“She's crazy, we've all agreed Finan needs to get rid of her.”

“He loves her, he won't do anything.”

Sihtric went to say something to you but you both turned when you heard happy squealing. A flash of a man with short hair and black leathers came running at Uhtred's daughter, picking her up in a show of affection as she lathered his face in kisses.

“That's….”

“Sigtryggr.” You finished for Sihtric, smiling over at him.

You watched their reunion before he looked your way, eyes wide and a grin on his face as he walked over to you, pulling you into the biggest hug possible.

“Sig!”

“My darling Y/N!” He said, picking you up off the ground and spinning you around.

“Stiorra, come and meet one of the best women I know!” He shouted and she came over to you both, all bright eyed and smiling. She gave you a wary look but Sigtryggr started talking about how you knew each other, your family history but you weren't entirely listening.

Your gaze had sought out Finan’s, his eyes tracking the movement of where Sigtryggr’s arm was around your shoulders, the way yours was around his waist in a sideways hug.

Finan was scowling, his eyes glaring daggers at that single hand placement and you had a sick satisfaction that maybe, just maybe, it was affecting him.

And you couldn't help but smile.

**

Finan was staring at you, watching you as you flitted between people to get to the bar. Some of the men were talking to you, having seen you down at the training grounds and had trained with you. Some of them were still weary about having a Dane here amongst them but it always baffled you how they were weary of you, but not of Uhtred. He was more of a Dane than he was a Christian but they willingly followed him into battle.

Then there was Sigtryggr and his men, some of whom you already knew thanks to him. Stiorra had come round to you, especially when she found out that you were both related, even if it was distantly. She'd become a great friend and you'd bonded over the runes and making sure that his men went off into battle wearing talismans.

Brynjar, one of Sigtryggr’s men, seemed to have taken a shine to you, always wanting to talk to you and throwing his arm around your shoulders.

Tonight, you'd purposely sought him out after you walked in and saw Ethne sat on Finan’s lap. You knew that there was a history with them, and that Finan would never betray her, especially with the promise you overheard him say to her but that didn't mean you couldn't have a little fun of your own seeing as Finan was doing the same.

You placed your arm around Brynjar’s waist, resting your head on his shoulder as you listened to another one of Sigtryggr's stories, laughing at something that had happened on one of his campaigns. For a Dane, he had certainly mellowed when it came to taking over Wessex and he seemed content to just be himself in Bebbanburg. He had a wife, he had friends and family, a place to live and men in his army, what more could he possibly want?

“Do you remember, Y/N, when we were children?”

“I'm older than you Sig, you were still a child while I was off fighting my first fight.”

He waved his hand in dismissal before continuing on, “Do you remember what you said you always wanted?”

“A weapon that looked like Thor’s hammer.”

“Brynjar…”

His arms fell from your shoulder and he motioned for some of Sigtryggr's men to come over. There was a parcel wrapped in silken fabric and you looked at Sigtryggr and then Brynjar.

“It's not the exact replica of Thor’s hammer but…”

You started shouting when you saw the intricately designed double sided war hammer. The design on it was the same as the one of Thor's hammer that Sigtryggr wore around his neck and so did Stiorra. The handle was jewelled and when you picked it up, it was light, not heavy in the slightest but you knew it would do so much damage.

“How did you get this?”

“Think of it as a wedding gift.” Sigtryggr said and you rolled your eyes before pulling your cousin into a tight hug, his laughter booming in your ears. You hugged Stiorra too because you knew she would have had a hand in finding the gift and then you hugged Brynjar, the giant man holding you tightly, his hand close to your bottom and he squeezed. You would have admonished him but it was the most you'd had from any man in a while.

“Thank you for the amazing gift, Sig!”

“It wasn't just me.” He said, pulling Stiorra away and grabbing a cup of ale as the pair of them only had eyes for each other after that.

“You had a hand in this gift?” You asked Brynjar.

“Maybe.”

“I am a married woman you know?” You said a lilt in your voice and you glanced over to Finan who was glaring over to where you were stood, clearly ignoring the way Ethne was nibbling at his jaw and leaving little kisses on any part of his skin she could find.

“I know, but he doesn't seem exactly interested. Any other man would be over here by now, throwing me off of you. Y/N, can't you feel what you do to me?”

Brynjar grinded his hips into yours and you gasped. You weren't sure what the gasp was for; feeling Brynjar's hardened dick, the way he was being so open with his feelings…

Or the fact that Ethne was now fully kissing Finan and he wasn't pushing her away. In fact, his hands were resting on her hips, squeezing softly.

It wasn't until you heard a loud crash that you realised that Sigtryggr had caused a commotion and was squaring up to Finan while Ethne was sprawled on the floor.

“Disrespecting my family!” You heard Sigtryggr say and you moved over to them.

“It's not a love match,” you heard Finan tell him once you managed to stand behind Sihtric, everyone else had formed a protective barrier and you couldn't get through, “It's political. Nothing more. What are we respecting exactly?”

“You married her. You respect her. That's what happens when you take wedding vows.”

“I didn't even want to marry her! It was forced upon me, upon both of us! Maybe speak to your cousin and get her to start respecting this marriage instead of going off with other people because she's sure making a lot of friends among the men, I wonder why that is huh?”

“You've gone too far!” Sigtryggr yelled but Finan laughed.

“No, I haven't. Our marriage isn't even binding anyway, we haven't consummated and we won't. There is nothing there between us and there never will be. So get out of my face, Sigtryggr, before I do something I'll regret.”

“Is that why you've been watching her for most of the night, huh? Watching her every move? You say there's nothing between you but I've been watching you watch her.”

“Maybe I'm watching because I don't trust her!”

“Finan…” You heard Ingrith say because she'd seen you, she'd seen the way your face dropped, the way you looked at Finan.

“What?” He snapped and you stepped between Sihtric and Osferth, looking at your so-called husband. Ethne had stood up, standing by him with her hand in his.

You were over all of it.

“Y/N… I…”

“Fuck you.” You told him, your throat clogged with unshed tears but you wouldn't cry, not in front of him and everyone else in the room. Ethne smirked as you walked past everyone, walked out of the pub and into the night. People were calling your name but you ignored them, aiming back towards Bebbanburg, towards a place you thought you could have called home but that was entirely wrong.

You didn't go to the room you shared with Finan, instead, you found a room near the back and you shut the door behind you, locked it so no one would be able to come in.

You felt a tear drip down your cheek but you blinked them furiously away because they would not fall. You would not cry over that Christian bastard. But you would do what you always did; shut off your emotions and be alone.

Because being alone was better than feeling as though the place you thought you'd found a home, the place that was full of friends and family, was anything but that; it was just another place to destroy your heart.

Tagging: (well, I used to have a huge list! But thank you to @oddsnendsfanfics who has given me some Finan blogs to tag!) @mrsalwayswrite @gemini-mama @deandoesthingstome @grlwtskulltattoo

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