What's better than having one lovable robot in your house? Having eight in your house! How do they interact, how do they feel about each other, and just how did they get here?
Spolier alert but that last one is never answered, just enjoy some assorted silly self-indulgent headcanons in celebration of my first fic, Human's Touch, reaching 1,000 notes! As well as an official end to my hiatus
Includes: AM (Ihnmaims), Hal (2001: A Space Odyssey), Edgar (Electric Dreams), Tau (Tau), P03 (Inscryption), Auto (Wall-E), Glados (Portal), Wheatley (Portal 2)
The mystery of how you ended up with everyone safely in your own home is second only to how you managed to keep them all from trying to rip each other apart.
Although that doesn't necessarily mean that they get along, especially early on. AM, Glados, and P03 like threatening everyone and love threatening each other- at this point you're sure the three of them started bonding over it but you're not sure when.
P03 tends to be the most antisocial of the lot, hiding away in whatever room you've allotted for him. But he and Hal did teach each other Inscryption and Chess respectively (at your suggestion), and you'll often find them playing together. P03 continues to be a sore loser.
No one is quite sure what to make of Auto. Since he has a tendency to do and say nothing for hours at a time- moving from room to room and just, staring. Except Hal, Hal seems to get him. You're pretty confident they're friends but also pretty confident they've said next to nothing to each other.
Assuming you have the space for it, Tau would love to take up gardening. He'll often get visited by Edgar or Wheatley proding him with questions (which he is always happy to answer) or by Auto who especially likes(?) to watch the garden. In silence of course. Tau doesn't mind him all that much but Edgar and Wheatley will leave if they see him coming, they find Auto a tad unnerving.
Hal, Edgar, and Tau form something of a music club in your house. They take turns sharing songs they like or even singing, dispite the differences in genres. Tau especially loves listening to Edgar's original songs, he may even ask for pointers on writing his own.
Wheatley's inferiority complex gets extra bad- being in a small area with not only Glados, but all the others who all have one thing minimum they're great at. At least Hal, Tau, and Edgar are nice to him- but that's offset by AM and P03 joining Galdos in terrorizing him. You're going to have to do some work with him.
Edgar and Wheatley do specifically become something of a trouble maker duo. It's not unusual to hear shattering glass from the next room over and find them guiltily trying to hide a broken plate. Although you tend to forgive them pretty easily (much to Glados's frustration) on account that it's almost always an accident.
You do your best to organize bonding activities for everyone. To varying levels of success. Your old reliable is putting on a movie or show and setting out random art supplies and board games. Once you even tried doing a video game tournament, but P03 got a bit too competitive for your liking. Most of them do appreciate you for trying though.
AM and Glados also click as a duo easily- but for all the wrong reasons. They love freaking everyone out, you included. AM gets into the habit of asking you disturbing, saw movie level 'would you rather' questions. He just enjoys creeping you out, but Galdos is always actually interested in your reasoning.
The others are healthily concerned about how comfortable you are around those two, but they're also constantly making jabs at the 'inferior robots'. Like- come on, why are you so attracted to the one literally titled the 'intelligence dampening sphere'. Aka: they think you're cool and smart and should hang out with them more, but of course they'd never plainly tell you that.
It does become a sort of running gag that finally they're the normal ones and you're the strange creature since you're the only human. They love poking fun at anything from your constant need to eat to the way you have to shut down for eight hours each night. God forbid you ever get sick.
Dispite, you know, owning the house they end up treating you by cat rules. You are liable to be pet (should you allow it), and if you fall asleep on someone it is unlikely they will move until you wake up. With the notable exceptions of Tau, who will bring you to your bedroom; and P03 who will feel little remorse at waking you up himself.
Needless to say you also have a fantastic home security system now. Between that being one of Tau's main jobs, AM and Glados being prone to homicide in general, and Auto having a taser (which was a surprise to everyone, they're all a little more concerned about him now) anyone who tries to break into your house is beyond screwed. They are not gonna let some random human hurt you.
Although the degree to which they show it differs wildly, they are appreciative of the home you've tried to make for them. Being free with some of the only other beings who could possibly understand their life experience is likely something they would have never been able to experience otherwise.
That may be why they haven't tried to destroy each other yet, the fear of good old mutually assured destruction. It would be just plain stupid to jeopardize your affection and thus their place in the house like that.
All in all, it certainly makes for a strange living arrangement but you cannot find it in yourself to regret the choices that led you to this point. You love your robots and you're at least seventy percent sure they love you to.
PLEASE I'm begging you I'm starving for Leshy x reader romantic content please I need this!!! It can be angst or fluff or both I just need to kiss the weird forest man
Go kiss that weird forest man anon!
Spring Flowers
Leshy x Gender neutral reader
———————————
Who needs the sun? Who needs to have someone prune their dead foliage? Leshy does, but he always grumbles about it.
“You know I’m very busy. There’s beasts I haven’t captured yet. New maps I could create, more figurines.” But Leshy makes no move to get up as you clip wilting vines and brittle twigs from his body with gardening scissors.
He sits with his legs crossed, deer-like hooves resting on his knees. Even with his terrible posture he still towers over you. You’re knelt beside him.
“Oh yes, old man.” You tease him gingerly. “I’m sure the whole world will fall apart if you leave that musty cabin for a second.”
The snow has finally melted underneath the light of the sun. The grass is vibrant again and flower buds begin to emerge from the ground. It’s finally warm enough for you to sit outside without a jacket and feel the sun on your skin.
“Are you seriously telling me that this sun doesn’t feel good?” You clip another wilted bundle of leaves.
“It’s alright. I suppose…” He doesn’t want to admit that he’s enjoying this as much as you are. Cute.
A comfortable silence washes over you both. During the grooming process, numerous insects fly or crawl their way over to him. Leshy doesn’t bother to shoo them away.
You lean closer to Leshy. He always smell nice. When he stays inside his cabin too long, he smells like parchment paper and dried herbs. If he was a scented candle you’re sure he would sell out quick.
Beside you is a pile of dead foliage that you could turn into compost. Now that it’s getting warm, you could set up your garden again. Canned food is practical for the colder months but it pales in comparison to the taste of fresh produce.
You trace the bumps of his spine with your finger. “What do you think I should grow?”
Leshy lets out a thoughtful hum. It’s a low, raspy sound. “I liked your cherry tomatoes.”
You don’t think he needs to eat like you do but he’ll take something from your garden every now and then. What he really seems to from you is your tea and jams. He most definitely has a sweet tooth that he won’t admit to.
“I think I still have some seeds. I’ll make sure you have enough to eat everyday!”
You think you see the foliage on his face shift slightly like it always does when he smiles.
You’re just about done pruning Leshy but then you see something. It’s on the back of his neck, a bright thing that sticks out in his shades of muted greens and browns.
“Wow honey,” You smile, leaning closer. “You didn’t tell me flowers could grow on you!”
It’s just a bud that’s an off white color. It looks like it could bloom into a daisy.
“I…Didn’t know I could grow flowers.” He reaches a hand behind him and you guide his slender fingers to the bud.
“This is why you should go outside more!” You lightly nudge his shoulder.
If he keeps staying in the sun, maybe more flowers will bloom. He could become vibrant with roses, daffodils, maybe even lantanas.
“I think you should pluck it.” His words shatter your fantasy.
“What!? Why!?” You move so that you’re sitting in front of him.
“I’m a Scrybe, dear. I can’t afford to look like a primped poodle.”
“Fine, fine, you can keep looking scary mysterious. But please can we at least keep this flower? You won’t even know it’s there!”
You give him the most pitiful puppy eyes you can muster. He stares at you silently before he cracks underneath the pressure. Leshy’s shoulders slump as he sighs.
“Fine. If that flower is really this precious to you.”
You lean forward. “You’re that precious to me.”
Your lips press together. His are cool, a little chapped but it’s not unpleasant.
You both lay on the grass. An opening in the trees shows clouds floating by. Nothing could ruin this moment.
“That one looks like a heart.” He points a bony finger towards the sky. It makes you smile.
This is a privilege that many others don’t get to see. He’s so tender, so sweet in a way that comes naturally to him. If you only you knew that it’s because of you.
WAWAAWAWAAWW ROMANCE THIS PLATONIC THIS WHATEVER I WANT TO SEE SCRYBES AS PARENTAL FIGURES
Leshy would be a well balanced father, he knows when to treat you sweetly and he knows when you need to be scolded. For me Leshy is one of the most leisurely patrons, so you can have plenty of free time to do any kind of parent and child activity.
I really believe that Leshy would teach you how to make wooden figures. Just you, his dear child, and him, making some wooden figures together. Did you cut yourself with the knife? Of course, don't worry, Leshy will have his full attention for you and take care of your cut. Leshy isn't desperate with certain injuries of yours, of course he's worried, but he knows you're going to be fine.
Leshy will have a hard time making food for you... Seeing how he's not very fond of cooking. Having some cookbooks would be nice right now...
Leshy tends to sleep hugging you, he wants to make sure you're warm, the woods usually tend to be cold, and he would hate to see his dear child have to suffer from a cold nose and sneezing.
Leshy will teach you how to hunt, write, read, how to skin animals without getting blood on you, etc. Basics for you to survive in the forest if at some point you want to live alone.
Also, Leshy tells you bedtime stories! He was hesitant at first, but seeing how insistent you were, he couldn't say 'no' to your lovely smile.
.
I bet Grimora has dreamed/wanted at some point in her life to have a child, so trust me, you are a blessing in her life!
Grimora showers you with verbal support. You did a drawing of her? "Why, isn't this splendid my child! I'm truly proud of you Y/N. Keep drawing and I bet you'll be even better than uncle Magnificus!". You finish the duties Grimora sent you to do? "Good job Y/N! I know that I could always trust you." Or anything else that you made a effort? "Magnificent Y/N! I'm so happy to hear this news!"
She doesn't spoil you, but Grimora clearly gives the attention every child needs to you and you alone. Grimora doesn't just want to be your mother, she wants to be your friend.
Grimora loves to teach you things, even the simplest things, like sewing or how to make tea. And after that the two of you try to sew something together while she listens to you talk about your day.
.
Magnificus being a father figure is similar to Leshy, but more protective. Leshy trusts you and knows you can get by with his learnings, while Magnificus is extremely protective of you.
He always asks where you're going and who your new friends are. Don't get him wrong, Magnificus its just worried and care about you, both your physical and mental health. He wants to make it more than clear that you are not just anyone, but the child of Magnificus. Perhaps this sudden fame and a lot of people treating you like royalty might irritate you slightly, so it would be best to talk to Magnificus about the situation if that's what bothers you, so he can make an attempt to sort things out.
I don't think Magnificus is one of the best fathers, so he puts a lot of expectations on you as his child, but over time he realizes that you are not a saint and sometimes you just don't have the physical/mental strength to do certain things , he tries to lighten the weight of expectations and responsibilities on you while you're still just a kid, you deserve to be free :]
And like Grimora, Magnificus likes to shower you with verbal support, always telling you he's proud of you for doing your chores. Sometimes, he even gives you gifts that he knows you like!
Magnificus is also a great listener. The moment between the two of you while Magnificus paints a picture and you talk endlessly about your interests is pleasant for him. Speaking of painting, you're the first person he shows the paintings he's done!
.
Oof, P03 is a tough one.
P03 never planned or was interested in having a child, and yet, here you are.
P03 is horrible at showing the affection they have for someone. The easiest type of affection for P03 to express affection is simply helping you with whatever difficulties you are having.
They help you pick up things you can't reach for your size, helps you with tasks you're having and listens to you talk about the horrible day you had (with a bonus of them calling whoever bothered you an asshole. And having something against that person after that day).
And of course P03 will teach you strategies and how to play cards, saying that "I don't want to suffer the shame of having a horrible player as a child", but in fact he meant "Omfg I don't want anyone calling my kid a loser I want them to be the best so they can be proud of themselfand not have their mental health destroyed by idiots"
And when P03 praises a drawing you made for it or completed a task or won a card battle, it just says "Good job Y/N", with a lil' pat pat in your head. But he SWEARS he's been so positively affected by the things you've done, he just has a big problem expressing it. So please, do tell him if you don't feel appreciated enough, and P03 will make an attempt to show his true feeling more.
I was the sadistic po3 ask and you are so right. I honestly hadn't thought about it for very long its the vibe he gives off initially but the more I think on it the more I realize hes the type to fall little by little and then all at once. The type to call you an idiot and give you advice in the same statement, to notice immediately when you change your hair style or a new shirt. The moment he realizes hes the type to do the oh. oh. oh no. Like thats his vibe. hes a dick but a loving one.
Okay FIRST OF ALL anon that post is almost two years old at this point so. Welcome back. I'm sorry I was so harsh to your Sadistic Yandere P03 concept.
SECOND P03 acts of service Tsundere type is so funny I love that for him. He will deny he did that for you, or if he accepts it he expects gratitude of the highest caliber.
This doesn't feel very Yandere to me though this is very base P03 affection to me. But that's because to me P03 is the least Yandere out of the Scrybes.. and I think that's why the polycule broke up before you arrived??
He was the object of their obsessions, and it was smothering and toxic and terrifying. He hated it, he was scared, he was cadged, he could never do anything on his own or go anywhere without checking in on someone. He never had his own space, never had control...
Yandere P03 would then push that cycle of abuse onto you, take control from you, not forcefully, but just a little bit at a time. Manipulate your space slowly so you have fewer and fewer options on where to go, like shortening a leash on a dog. It takes time. It takes routine.
This though, the acts of service and catering to your comfort, is Post Recovery P03. A P03 who's had time, a LOT of time, to himself, to his space, and found loneliness. He wants you to want to come back, because deep down he needs you, but doesn't want to admit that, because to him it's wrong to need someone. It hits too close to home, make him feel too much like the other scrybes.
He'll give you reasons to want to come back, and it'll remind him of how Grimora would always lend him things so he'd have reason to return. How she'd gift him everything he'd wanted so he'd come back, how she'd loose several matches in a row, and only win the one he'd said was his last game, so he'd stay and challenge her to a rematch
He'll follow on your heel as you wander around his factory because it's dangerous and maze like, and it'll remind him of the feeling of being followed, of being watched, by Magnificus everywhere he went. The suffocating feeling of never being anywhere alone, of eyes that saw his every possible future always on him. He'll deny his affections to you and remind himself of Magnificus doing the same when he'd stumbled into a room covered wall to wall in paintings of himself, in situations he knew Magnificus was not with him
He'll spend time tailoring his game to your play style, making sure cards you like are more plentiful, making sure the puzzles are engaging and challenging, and he'll remind himself of Leshy, the worst of them all, and that cabin full of intrigue. Of story and hard fights and difficult puzzles and nights of "Just one more round" turned three and four. When he floats just above you to feel superior he'll be reminded of the wall that use to be a door that he'd pressed himself against Leshy towered above him, a man who'd say one thing and feel another, who'd played the hero over and over in their games, and revealed himself the villain when P03 attempted to leave
He doesn't want to need you in the same way the other Scrybes had needed him
You have no idea just how long I was waiting for someone to ask me this. But for some reason I can't find the ask in my inbox. I don't think I deleted it, so I'm not sure where it could've gone.
But anyways, this was requested from someone so whoever requested hi hello here's the stuff you asked me for :)
I hope you enjoy and have a good rest of your day/night!
-Scrybes with a reader who’s getting gray hairs-
—
Leshy
Leshy is able to pick up that you're growing in gray hairs fairly quickly. He’s quite observant and tends to notice a lot of things about people that others would usually miss.
With that said, this results in Leshy just..staring at you..trying to pinpoint which area is becoming more gray than the other. Not in a weird way, of course, he’s merely watching your telltale sign of aging growing more and more as time goes on.
He doesn’t necessarily make comments on it, he does point it out the first time he notices though. Whether or not you noticed before he did depends, but otherwise he doesn’t say anything about it. Why make such a fuss over something that is simply a sign of aging?
If you were to be a bit self conscious about your gray hairs, then Leshy is certainly quick to reassure you. Simply telling you that there is nothing for you to worry about, and that the process was only natural in all life. Even wolves get gray around their muzzles at some point, so you are no different. He will try as best as he possibly can in his own Leshy way to help you feel better, either by incorporating your aging state into his game in a more euphoric way or perhaps showing you an elder beast or two to show you that there’s nothing outlandish about your predicament.
This does not stop him from treating you the same as ever, a small quip here and there but little else. You’re simply growing with time, just as much as any life that graces the Earth. But at the end of the day, he still sees his precious challenger just as much as when you first met.
Grimora
Grimora is another that’s quick to catch on that you’re growing in gray hairs. In fact, she’s rather elated at the news! It only brings her great joy that you are showing your age more prominently, though she won’t force you to enjoy it with her, but not without providing some insight to hopefully give some food for thought.
She doesn’t point it out immediately after she notices for the first time, only if you don’t after some time passes. A simple, “Have you looked at yourself in a mirror lately, dear?” is probably what she would say in regards to pointing it out, but definitely in a more polite sense than if you took it out of context. Like Leshy, she doesn’t make a huge deal about it. Sure, she’s glad to see it, but she won’t push her limits especially if you’re uncomfortable.
Speaking of which, if you were feeling self conscious about it, Grimora is also quick to help regenerate your mood, although likely not as immediate as Leshy. To help you feel better, she would likely give you reassuring words and general comfort. Perhaps she would even guide you to her special mirror and point out just how lovely you look with gray hairs, explaining that whatever effects of aging show on your body, don’t affect just how much she loves and cares about you. She would also ask a few of her ghouls who definitely would have had such gray hairs about it and gain some reassurance from an outside party to further prove her point.
Grimora loves the slight situation that you have, seeing it as nothing more but a shining example of just how resilient you’ve been throughout the years to get to this point in your life.
P03
“Haha old.”
P03 would undoubtedly say that the minute he notices. Of course, he doesn’t exactly mean to be rude entirely, but it definitely is to tease you at least a little bit. If that wasn’t enough, he makes sure to comment on it almost every single day afterwards. It only upticks the teasing and banter that was already being tossed around preemptively. Unless of course you say otherwise, in which case he will respect that with a slight huff.
He certainly comments on it the most out of the four by a long shot. In fact, most of the insult humor is based around you and becoming older with gray hairs. He just will hardly ever stop running its voice box about it until the day it rusts over.
On that note, he can’t help but feel at least a little anxious. As he knows that you’re only inching closer and closer towards death and that your discoloring hair is only a sign that your time is just barely starting to wrap up. But like hell he would actually admit that to anyone, no matter their relationship with it, they’re not getting a single word out of it.
If you’re feeling self conscious about your gradual change in appearance, there’s not much that P03 can provide. But what he can do is give you someone to lean on and talk to, in which case it can provide a bit more verbal comfort and show that softer side of him that it otherwise would keep hidden away. He can’t exactly compare and show you that aging like this is normal via real demonstrations, but the words of reassurance definitely help make up for that.
P03 honestly, truly, doesn’t care about the fact that your hair is growing gray, it just loves to be a bitch about it and tease you nonstop or whenever it gets the chance given the circumstance.
Magnificus
Magnificus doesn’t really notice a whole bunch, but that might be because he already saw it beforehand. He points it out if you don’t but in a more subtle comment that could be compliments if you look at it a certain way. Something along the lines of, “A new splash of color, dear?”
Compliments it a lot. Doesn’t let you feel self conscious about it. Well, not entirely, he’ll let you feel what you want to feel, but definitely doesn’t let emotions weighing you down based on appearance alter your perception of yourself.
Though like P03 he does get highly anxious about your aging. He knows that one day you’ll go, it’s going to happen, even if he hasn’t had a vision about it yet, and he dreads the day it will happen. He loves and cares about his darling too much to just let them go on such short notice, even if a few strands of gray hair are only the very brinks of the beginning of that process. It could be like a few streaks and he’d still be a nervous wreck. You might have to help him through it from time to time depending on how bad it is.
If you were more strongly feeling self conscious about your gray hairs, he will first try and over some encouraging words. “I don’t see anything even remotely wrong, my dear, I only see a few new strokes of unique coloring on something that will always be gorgeous.” Is something that he would likely say. If that doesn’t work, then he resorts to actively doing something with you to show you that there really isn’t anything wrong with your appearance. If that doesn’t work, then he takes you to his students to get their thoughts. And if even that doesn’t work, then he’s down to his last resort; Magnificus is going to take you by the hand all the way to Grimora’s just for her to prove his point.
Magnificus will go to extensive lengths for you, more than he has ever done with anyone, ever. That’s just because he loves you so much, and doesn’t want you to lose sight of who you always were, youthful or aging.
You and me both, brudda! I'm dying over this 'bot- and it shows, I went. WAAAY over on this one, wow. To be fair, though! I actually tried to write a short intro, then took the end from a WIP that I'm banging away at, so it ended up being long 'cuz of that. Not that anyone minds, am I right!? Enjoy~
P03 x GN!Reader
You were embroiled deep in an intense match with P03 and he was not making it easy while he jeered the whole time. "You've forgotten your lane positioning again," he pointed out with that smug face.
"Yeah, well- I bet I can still win," you huffed more to yourself. The response was not lost on him.
"Bet, you said?" he chirped, even more self-satisfied, "Alright! If I win, you have to clean up the reject pile."
"Yeesh," you replied, pausing. What could you demand in exchange-? And it hit you. "If I win," you wore a similar smug expression, "You have to give me a hug."
P03 bleeped a noise in surprise and you got to see shock on his screen. "What- Wait- That's it- or-" he stuttered, trying to comprehend. Ellipsis took over his screen, then he corrected himself, "Fine, weirdo. Deal."
Your match continued… and suddenly P03's teasing was missing. You held back pointing it out- but when the next turn came, he- hesitated on card placement. Then he put down a card in a clearly unoptimized spot. You held your tongue again, but it was difficult.
On your next turn, you got the card you needed to end the match. The scales tipped as P03 watched with keen interest- then as soon as it was over, he made an exaggerated sigh through his fans. "Lame," he muttered, "Now I have to let you touch me."
The truth was buzzing in your skull. You saw it. He obviously threw that match.
"Deal's a deal!" you teased, jumping up from your chair. P03 looked a little startled at your enthusiasm as you rounded the table. "So get down here and accept your 'punishment.'"
P03 paused, then lowered his hover by a foot to decrease the height difference, giving the impression he was kneeling down to meet you. He turned his arm outward to allow you close and his eyes had shifted to the side in an expression you could only call 'tsundere.'
You fought down your laugh and met him in two strides. You threw your arms up to hug him around his midsection, reaching on your tip-toes to do so. Even though he was expecting it, P03's frame jerked with what sounded like an alarmed beep. There was a second of hesitation, then slowly, cautiously… his heavy arm circled around your back and squeezed you to his frame.
Your face ached with how much you were smiling. You couldn't help nudging your cheek against his chassis. The metal was surprisingly warm, you could hear faint clicking and whirring from his internal mechanisms. He smelled like machine oil and warm exhaust with a hint of grime, but you didn't care in the slightest.
The moment lasted forever, or it felt like it.
You felt a tiny tremble in his arm behind your back, heard another whirr add in as an internal fan kicked on- then suddenly P03's arm withdrew and wedged between you and him to pry you off. "Alright, that's enough," he muttered as he removed you, but you didn't miss the dash marks on his cheeks before they vanished.
But you knew the truth now- and you were determined to weaponize it.
[Author’s Note: P03 doesn’t like ur cat. That’s the summary. This is very short 😅]
He absolutely hated anything organic. You were the only exception of this but anything else was a big no go.
P03 could tell with the way you looked at them that you were scheming, you held an old blanket close to your chest. When you revealed it to be a kitten they immediately hovered to the other side of the room.
You were bringing that dirty flesh bag into their own sterile factory!?
Though he couldn’t say no to you and your kindness for the creature so he allowed it to stay until a home could be found for it.
Months later and this little shit was still living in the factory. He banged his claw against the conveyor belt yet the cat laid there peacefully, eyes closed in the robot’s direction as if taunting him. “Get off you little $4!# !” He banged his claw against it once more, the fat little shit did nothing.
“Y/n!” He screamed out, realizing there would be no reply because you weren’t there at the moment. Dammit. It was up to him to deal with this cat. “Ugh, I have to touch you.” Their claw reached forward, tightening around the cat’s torso. “Ew. Ew. Ew.” Once the cat was a safe distance they dropped the feline.
The feline got right back on the conveyor belt, circling them laying back down.
