this is weird but im afab and i always found myself closer to the term trans woman than a trans man or a cis woman. right from when i was younger, i felt like a boy who was supposed to be a girl and is a girl. like ik this sounds off and weird but. i just, to put it in simple terms, felt like a woman in a man's body, but i have a woman's body already??!!!! and ig the fact that i had short hair and was made to wear clothes intended for boys and like basically presenting as masc though i wanted to be a girly girl?? once i turned 12 i tried to do all the things i couldn't earlier, i had long hair, i wore lots and lots of dresses which is weird for someone who lives in india, i hated and still hate dupattas but yeah. my journey with gender is so conflicted and confusing. i currently identify as enby (nblw) but i wish i was a lesbian, i think i am, just a she/they one. and like i have this thing where i promised myself that i wouldn't transition because well i dont want to. im not comfy in my body but i wouldn't change it.
-ised
omg hi!!! i also live in india!! hi five!!
you can be a lesbian!! there are a lot of nonbinary lesbians and theres a long history of nonbinary lesbians. you wouldn't be the first and you certainly won't be the last.
the thing with feeling closer to the term trans woman is interesting. could it be because like, you making the choice to be feminine instead of having it imposed on you? i'm not fully sure how to help you with that part
i mean. dude. most people who don't want to transition don't promise themselves that they won't do it. that seems indicative of some feelings you're pushing down there.
i understand not being comfortable in your body. but why do you think that is? dysphoria, low self esteem, misogyny, insecurity, etc? you gotta think about that.
being uncomfortable in your body is honestly a kind of sucky way to live, and i don't recommend it. wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy. and you're gonna keep living in this discomfort if you dont figure out where that seed has found its root in your mind and yank it up outta the soil, kid
if it's dysphoria, there are gender affirming measures you can take. if its misogyny, there are things in your midn society's put there you can take steps towards unlearning. with low self esteem and insecurities, there are ways you can move towards learning to love yourself.
i hope i was able to help out dude. sending love to wherever u are (same country!!)
