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Server: "\\[Server IP address] is not accessible. You might not have permission to use this network resource. Contact the administrator of this server to find out if you have access permissions."
Me: "The fuck I don't ... motherfucker, I *AM* the administrator!"
=____=
I know the posts with IT people exchanging anecdotes about the ridiculous cases of computing ineptitude they had to deal with from the non-IT people are popular and yeah, genuinely funny – being computer literate myself I do sometimes want to tear my hair out when asked by a co-worker to show them how to attach a file to an email, etc.
But there’s the other side of the medal – the side where the IT service is… let’s say, less than useful.
Admin: We have a problem, we can’t access the menu, because the program keeps freezing, and we can’t pull the list we need.
Senior IT assistant: You just have to change the date of the list you’re trying to pull up so it narrows down the search and the program stops freezing.
Admin: Yes, but you can only change the data from the menu, we can’t access it, because it keeps freezing.
Senior IT assistant: You will be able as soon as you change the date in the menu.
Admin: We can’t access the menu, that’s the issue!
Senior IT assistant: Because you have to change the date in the menu!
Admin: We can’t access the menu!!
Senior IT assistant: Yes, but if you just go to the menu and change the date…
This was on loudspeaker for every and all to hear. Believe it or not, it went on for two months until a person from IT arrived to the unit and saw with their very own eyes that no, we can’t access the goddamn menu=_= As it turns out, the program was pulling too much data at a time and freezing, because IT forgot to tell it not to at the implementation.
And this treasure:
IT department: Bear with us. We will implement this new system and it will make everything easier. It will connect all these other systems and send information between them, and it has all these useful tools to save you time! It’s going to take a while, but it’s gonna be worth it!
6 months later
Admin: Not one element of the new system works as intended and the tools are broken to the point where they have to be corrected by hand, which takes more time than it reasonably should??
IT dept: Yeah, you will have to keep doing it for a while until we fix this.
3 months later
Admin: When will you fix it?
IT dept: The thing is – never. It’s just has to be like that from now on.
Admin: So it’s broken and it will stay like that now.
It dept: Yeah. Can you rate our service?
Admin across 6 units: Is there a reason why we can’t have the industry standard instead of this Frankenstein’s monster of a mess?
IT dept: We’ve already paid for it.
Admin: ...nothing in it works and we’re still paying for it?
IT dept: Yes. Can you rate the service?
And the recent:
Me: Hello, we’ve lost access to this folder yesterday and need it back?
IT assistant: Oh, it says you have no permissions to access it.
Me: No, we do, this folder is specifically made for our admin team so we can get reports from the X dept.
IT assistant: Yeah, it was created by the X dept team and only they can access it.
Me: Yeah, it was created by them for us, so we have access to their files, a year ago. We were able to access it until yesterday, what’s changed??
IT assistant: Nothing changed, you just have no access to it.
Me: I had that access yesterday, so something had to change! Why?
IT assistant: I don’t know.
Me: Can you fix it?
IT assistant: I don’t know.
Me: We desperately need access to this folder (and we really do, it’s medical field), can someone else on your team fix this?
IT assistant: …I will ask around.
...
If all of your service is down, how does this statement make sense: "WAN access would be down, but LAN should be up still"
User: I'm not much of a PC person; I use Macs at home
Me: *nods in acknowledgement*
Inner me: But the Caps Lock key works the same way on both
is it Friday yet?
OMG my users will drive me to drink. Wait they already do. We got our new laptops on 20th October, right? Out of my 38 active users, I have had to reimage three laptops already because they kept shutting the computer DOWN before Windows could load. So that means that Windows became corrupted and stuck in that lovely system restore loop we all know and love. This all because they felt their log-on was “taking too long” so they kept shutting off the damned laptop. You know what else takes too long? Having to fucking reinstall Windows AND re-encrypt a laptop for no good reason!
