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it feels like a physical thing that i cant put back together

#2 #just me #its like....#i had to do something big so he'd hate me enough to leave me alone #and so that id really have a reason to never talk to him again #i think 13 strep throat IS reason enough but i needed something that felt real #im sorry im sorry im sorry im sorry im sorry

The Spotify wrappeds I see on tumblr are so different from each other compared to the ones I see on instagram or my other socials

#its like....#people are actually themselves on this app #i love this website

matching backgrounds anyone

unfruitified versions found below

#oh what's that? he found another thing to be abnormal about???#god help us all #drawing clone armor is so satisfying #its like....#crunchy.#anyways #commander cody #captain rex #the clone wars #tcw #star wars #star wars fanart #fanart #also just blanket permission to use this as a background or pfp #altho i would appreciate it if you credited asw <333 #aviiart

Trying to talk to new people I like online puts me into like Autism Overdrive mode where - I am sorry but I have to send you a paragraph to be clear about how I hope I am coming across and how you are welcome to tell me that I am being annoying/overbearing.

#autism #its like....#i have ti tell online friends that i get excited or messge a lot #or if im working with somone on something that i am very particular #but i mean no offense by it #and i have to like...#preemptively warn people #or ask them to let me know if i cross a boundary or something like that #and i wanna be like yea fyi i am autistic #but i feel like bottomfeeding tumblr users ruined that #and now it is gonna sound like #“i am autistic so i get to do whatever i want”#when its the exact opposite #bleh

"sets my teeth on edge" is such a funny saying if you think about it

#its like....#what edge #is it like gums? gums rising?#or is it like a snarl?#????#personal

i turn into the worst most terrible human being whenever im near my mother bc why am i doing anything and everything to avoid my chores just bc i dont wanna do anything "for her"

#yesterday i had the realisation that shes over 50 years old #and like wouldnt normal ppl care for their parents and not let them lift a finger at this age??#and what am i doing? the exact opposite #its like....#i hate her so much and i want her to suffer #and its happening??? like unconsciously??? i usually realize that i COULDVE done smth for her only afterwards #its making me feel soooo bad but somehow i still cant regret it #man. trauma fucking sucks i need a therapist

actually heartbreaking when you realize that someone you thought you knew is actually a complete loser with nothing going for them and you wasted 8 years of your life caring about them and loving them and being their friend

#alexis.exe #do not reblog #personal #its like....#when your ex friend texts you after they have you blocked for a month and asks for your fucking LIBRARY app #like..... damn she was really like this the whole time??????#i CHOSE to be friends with her???#how fucking stupid am i #gave so much love to someone who genuinely only cared about my library app ????????#insane behaviour actually #whatever at least i dont have to talk to her anymore

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