pairing: jesse/fem!reader
genre: smut smut smut
w.c.: 5.5k
a/n: the first scene of 2x03 had me blacking out and then i wrote this in two days. this is my first time writing for jesse, pls be gentle and i hope you enjoy because i had so much fun writing this <3 ty for my dear lover for enabling me. you can also imagine either show or game jesse for this!
summary: You've been distracted by your boyfriend all morning. Jesse knows you better than you expected.
c.w.: 18+ MDNI, porn no plot, post 2x02 but joel lives (!), established relationship, jesse is sexy and reader is horny for his arms, oral sex (f receiving), brief fingering, unprotected p in v sex (lets pretend birth control exists ok), fluff, no y/n
read below or on ao3 here <3
You’re starting to wonder if you’ve gone insane.
Jackson has been somber for the past several months—mourning all the losses after the walls were breached and focusing on rebuilding. The makeshift hospital was still as busy as ever, and every time word spread that another person had succumbed to their injuries, the weight that seemed to blanket over the town grew heavier, quieter.
Luckily, you hadn’t lost anybody you were particularly close with. Even then, you’re not sure if you would even have the time to mourn them with how hard the council was pushing any and all able-bodied people to help in the rebuild. Your body was sore and hands were covered in blisters as you helped carry logs of wood to the main street.
So, you’re not exactly sure why you’re about to start drooling, heart thudding in your chest and pulsing between your legs, as you watch Jesse lift a sledgehammer to pound a wooden pillar into the ground.
You stop in your tracks, arms aching despite the small bundle of wood you’re carrying, as you stare, absolutely transfixed.
Jesse always ran warm, warmer than you, so despite the chill in the spring air, he was wearing a short-sleeved shirt that showcased his broad shoulders and thick arms. You watch as his muscles bulge with every lift of the sledgehammer, the prominent veins running along his forearms drawing your attention. The buttons of his shirt were undone, providing you a delicious peak of his chest, as if he was teasing you.
Sweat was already starting to form along his hairline, causing a few strands to start sticking to his skin. His pants were tight, unfairly hugging his hips, his thick thighs straining through the fabric. If you strain your ears hard enough, now able to discern the low cadence of his voice through a crowd, you could detect the quiet grunts with every lift of the sledgehammer.
You blame the fact that you both have been too busy with the repairs and Jesse being added to the council for the way molten heat begins to pool at your core, fingers twitching with the rampant desire to get your hands on him.
The only time you’ve been able to spend with Jesse lately was when he would crawl into your bed late at night, usually when you were already asleep. Sometimes you were able to wake up before he had to leave and would only have time to press your face into his chest, inhaling and memorizing his clean scent. Other times he’d already be gone, leaving a short and concise note but with a crooked little heart next to his name.
So you’re a little sexually frustrated, okay?
“You alright?”
You startle out of your thoughts, tearing your gaze away from your boyfriend continuing to grunt extremely inappropriately, to Tommy sitting on the sidelines while he waited for his turn.
He’s watching you with a hint of a smirk tugging at his lips despite the weariness physically weighing on his shoulders.
Tommy’s nice, always has been, and seemed to be around you more lately after he found out you and Jesse were a thing. You’re not exactly sure why, but you had found yourself spending more time with him and Maria, Ellie, and even Joel. You were starting to feel like you had an actual group of people that cared about you.
His question seems to have caught Jesse’s attention. He stops working, resting the sledgehammer onto the ground and leaning against it, raising an eyebrow at you.
Jesse’s protective, always has been, but even moreso in the past several weeks. He says it’s because he knows you and how you’re a little reckless, impulsive, but you know that’s not entirely true.
You feel heat crawl up your neck at being caught ogling, and you don’t even bother to tiptoe around Tommy like you know other people have been doing after Joel’s near-death experience when you mutter a “shut up” and stalk away.
You hear Tommy laugh. The sound makes you smile, your shoulders loosening up because he’s been so stressed lately with the rebuild and worrying about Joel still in the hospital.
You ignore the weight of Jesse’s gaze digging into your back.
-
You’re unfortunately tasked with clearing out some additional rubble from a nearby building, which means your entire morning is spent with Jesse’s grunting and groaning within earshot as he worked only several feet away.
It’s a cruel form of torture, and you almost drop at least 2 pieces of concrete on your feet because you were too enraptured by the way you could see his muscles shift underneath his shirt.
By the time your group breaks for lunch, you’re shifting uncomfortably due to the wetness gathering in your panties and brushing against your thighs. The ache in your shoulders and hips pales in comparison to the ache in your core as Jesse sidles up next to you silently.
“Ready?” he asks, slightly out of breath and brushing his hair away from his forehead with his wrist. He’s so hot, it’s really unfair.
It was Jesse’s suggestion to take a lunch together whenever you could if he wasn’t busy. Your heart had thumped an erratic and concerning pace when he brought it up, his voice low and tinged with an endearing sort of bashfulness.
It had taken you awhile but you’ve come to find out that Jesse was more affectionate in private than in public. He liked to spend time with you, enjoyed being in your presence and sitting in silence. He didn’t have much dating experience besides Dina, who often took the reins in their relationship, so him making an effort to make time for you despite his busy schedule was new to the both of you.
“Yep,” you say, hoping he doesn’t notice the rasp in your voice, and steps in time with him as you head to your house only a couple blocks away.
Jesse has only been able to join you for lunch a handful of times, often having to give you a regretful smile before being pulled away for an emergency council meeting or to help another person on the other side of town. You didn’t mind, you knew he was busy, knew that this was what to be expected after he had told you that night that he was talking to Maria about being added to the council.
You admired him and his tenacity for wanting to help the people of Jackson. He was undoubtedly the most responsible person in your age group and it only made sense that he got added since he was friendly, even had a golden boy reputation.
You knew that he couldn’t talk about what happened during their meetings, even to you, and you honestly didn’t have much to talk about besides the fact that your neighbor’s dog slept on your porch last night.
So you two walked in comfortable silence, his bare arm brushing against your sleeve every few paces. Even through your multiple layers, the warmth of him still bled through the sweaters and was doing nothing to quell the building heat underneath your skin. The smell of him and his sweat, mixing with the smoky burning of wood nearby, was starting to make you feel faint.
By the time you two make it to your house, you were one second away from falling to your knees and scrambling to unbuckle his belt to tug his pants down and take him in your mouth.
It’s when the front door closes behind you when Jesse asks “You okay?”
You’re toeing off your boots and tugging off your jacket to throw over the rusty coatrack by the door before making your way to the kitchen, already preoccupied by trying to remember what sandwich ingredients you could scrounge together. “Yeah, why wouldn’t I be?”
“You just seemed distracted today.”
You have no idea. “I’m just tired today.”
Jesse hums, and you think you’re off the hook and can focus on rushing to make a sandwich because Tommy does not give you guys enough time for lunch, when he’s suddenly pressing up against you, his large hands resting on your hips and mouth inches from your ear as he mutters “So that’s why you kept staring at me today? Because you were distracted?”
You huff out a laugh, setting down your butter knife, because you’re honestly not surprised. Jesse was possibly the most perceptive person you knew, of course he would notice that you were ogling him all morning. You knew at this point, there was no harm in hiding anymore.
You lean back into his chest, sturdy and warm, as he noses at the nape of your neck. “And what if I was?”
“Just making sure.” And then he’s spinning you around until the edge of the counter digs into the small of your back and pressing his mouth to yours.
He’s gentle, always gentle, his hands skimming up your sides reverently, as if worried you were about to disappear into thin air. His lips are unbearably soft, maybe a little chapped, as you kiss him back and part your lips with a sigh. He tastes like the stale coffee from this morning and it’s the best thing you’ve had all day.
You loop your arms around his broad shoulders, tugging him closer until the hard line of his body was pressed up against yours. You card your fingers through the tufts of hair at the nape of his neck, humming at the sensation of being trapped by his body, and experimentally tug.
Jesse lets out a low groan, muffled against your mouth, and then his large hands slide down to your ass to squeeze once before suddenly lifting you up.
You squeal against his lips, causing him to smile, and your legs instinctually come to wrap around his waist despite already being seated on the counter. The coldness seeping through your jeans shocks you and provides a delicious contrast with Jesse’s heated body against yours.
When you separate from each other, you’re panting into each other’s open mouths. Jesse leans his forehead against yours, hands on your thighs, and from this proximity, you’re mesmerized by the fan of his eyelashes against his cheekbones as he catches his breath and the way his hair tickled your face.
When he opens his eyes to peer into yours, your breath gets stuck in your throat along with something else you can’t name at his hungry gaze, eyes dark and pupils wide.
Jesse has always been able to say so much with just his eyes; a sharp warning that Maria was on her way to give you a stern talking to, warm fondness when you were telling him about what you bartered for today at the market, or primal desire whenever you stripped and crawled into bed with him.
“Are you okay with skipping lunch today?” he asks, voice a low timbre that sends a shiver running down your spine. His hands, rough with the day’s work, knead your thighs through your jeans, and the silent strength in his thick fingers and the flex of the muscles in his biceps has you licking your lips. You could feel the heat of his cock, hard and confined in his jeans, against your inner thigh.
“Are you going to eat something else?”
Jesse rolls his eyes, an exasperated smile tugging at his lips that he tries to hide. It has you beaming. He squeezes your inner thighs a bit harder, as if in a warning. “You’re unbelievable, you know that?”
“Yeah, but you love me,” you say, before you could think better of it.
It’s slight, but you can tell he pauses by the way his breath catches and his hands falter. A rush of panic rises up your throat and you say, as nonchalantly as you could, “As long as you sneak me something from the food hall later?”
You hope he can’t tell that you’re holding your breath, nearly praying that he doesn’t point out your slip up.
His eyes soften, causing a sudden weakness in your chest, before he’s reaching out to tuck a strand of hair behind your ear. “Deal.”
You give him a shaky smile. You know he sees right through you.
But it doesn’t matter, because he’s leaning in to kiss you again, harder, rougher, as if he can’t find the words he wants to say and lets his desire for you to do the talking for him.
You melt into him, you always do, and when you press your palm against his chest to feel the steady rhythm of his heart, you’ve never felt so safe in your entire life.
“I guess we better hurry up then,” he whispers, giving you a slight smirk, before his hands expertly unbuttons your jeans, tugs down the zipper, and then helps you tug them down all the way off your legs.
You nod rapidly, causing him to chuckle breathily. You reach out for him to grab at his arms, pulling him in to kiss you again.
He obliges, because he always does when you peer up at him with glazed over eyes, as if he’s already fucked you.
You hum against his mouth, the ache in your pussy starting to become unbearable. You’re barely aware of his hands running down your bare thighs, causing goosebumps to rise, before he’s lifting your legs up by the knees to prop your feet up on the counter.
The new position has you spread open and exposed, dimly aware of the way you could feel your panties sticking to your pussy. You’re expecting him to rub his thick fingers alongside your seam through the fabric, coaxing a breathy whimper from your lips, before tugging it aside to thrust a finger inside of your soaking entrance.
You don’t expect him to pull away. You definitely don’t expect him to fall to his knees, face achingly close to your center, while his hands squeeze at the flesh of your thighs before prying them apart.
“Oh,” you exhale, eyes wide, as your hands scramble to the dull edge of the counter as your mind reels at the heady image of Jesse, sweet and courteous, on his knees. His face inches from your pussy.
“Fuck, baby, you’re already so wet,” he whispers, as if in awe. His right hand comes to trace the edge of your panties, a plain baby blue color, while he stares unblinkingly at the definite wet spot at the center.
“I was just kidding, you don’t actually have to—”
“I want to,” he says, and when he looks up at you, your chest aches at the tender affection clear on his face. “Is that okay?”
And it’s not like he hasn’t gone down on you before. In fact, it seems like he tries to eat you out any chance he got, which you were definitely not complaining about. You still shivered when you thought about the first time he ate you out, the first time you ever came from another man’s mouth on you, and how your thighs trembled as you squeezed around his head. You swear you had thought you died and gone to heaven.
Now, however…
“We’ve just had a long morning; you know I sweat a lot…” you trail off. It sounds weak, even to your own ears.
Another exasperated sigh, though this time Jesse doesn’t even bother hiding the fond smile. “You know I don’t care about that.”
But he waits. He stays on his knees, thumbs tracing comforting and distracting circles against your inner thighs, and he just waits. For your permission.
You don’t think your heart can swell any further before it’s bound to burst. “Okay.”
Jesse’s smile grows, making him look utterly sweet and boyish, before leaning in to press an open-mouthed kiss on your inner thigh, and then another, and then another.
“Don’t worry,” he mumbles, as his kisses begin moving inwards to your aching cunt.
You exhale unsteadily, thighs already starting to shake from holding this position and the sensation of his mouth on you. The scratch of his slightly chapped lips, the damp kisses he leaves that cool as soon as he moves to the next inch of skin, and his hands that have moved to your thighs and taking some of your weight, has you nearly begging for him to hurry up.
As if he can read your mind, he pauses, his mouth hovering over the crotch of your panties that have undoubtedly melded to your pussy.
“Besides,” Jesse whispers, and the barest brush of his lips against the fabric has you shivering. You resist the urge to card your fingers through his hair to tug his face closer. “I have to take care of my girl, right?”
And then he’s pressing his open mouth to your cunt, deliberately nowhere close to your clit, but the action still wretches a gasp out of you. His mouth and his breath are hot as he takes his time, as if warming you up despite the fact that you two do not have enough time for this.
But he just looks so pretty, you think as you glance down at him. His eyes were shut, savoring you, brow relaxed as if he wouldn’t be anywhere else in the world besides between your thighs.
“Jesse..” you sigh, slightly frustrated, as you thread your fingers through his hair to push out of his face. Your hips jolt forward, impatient.
He opens his eyes at that and the heat in his expression has you wanting to scoot forward on the counter until your ass was hanging off, if only to get closer to him. He cocks his eyebrow at you and mutters something suspiciously like you’re lucky that I like you so much.
Before you could question him, he’s parting his lips and then laving his tongue over you, flat and over your clit through the fabric of your panties.
You let out a soft moan, your hand on his hair tightening. The action causes Jesse to groan, muffled between your thighs, and then he’s diving in fully, pressing sloppy wet kisses against your core.
It’s heavenly, especially after not being touched for several weeks, but it’s still not enough as your hips shift forward to chase the feeling of his warm mouth.
His hands on your thighs tighten, another warning, before he’s finally dipping his thumb into the crotch of your panties to pull it aside and exposing your soaking cunt to him.
You don’t even have time to gasp at the rush of cool air against your warm skin before his mouth is on you again, tongue parting your puffy folds as he licks a stripe up your seam.
A shaky moan falls from your lips, sheer ecstasy at finally being touched without some stupid fabric in the way dripping into your veins and making you drop your head back. Your thighs begin to shake from where you still have your feet propped up on the counter, spreading you open further.
Jesse has always taken his time with you, steady and focused and knowing exactly what to do to have you unraveling in his mouth. He gathers the wetness increasingly dripping from your entrance, tasting you and groaning, spurring him on even further to press his face harder against your cunt. His strong nose prods at your clit and it has you choking on a gasp as heat begins to curl up your spine.
He traces along your folds with a firm tongue, the lewd noises from his mouth on you filling your ears, before circling deliberately around your clit.
Your mouth drops open, eyes rolling back, and you blame the fact that it’s been way too long since you’ve had his mouth on you for the way your orgasm rapidly approaches.
“Fuck, Jesse,” you gasp, head lolling over your shoulder as you stare, glassy-eyed, as he meets your gaze from where he’s kneeling in your fucking kitchen with his mouth on your pussy. “I’m—"
He closes his eyes and presses his face further against your core, tongue flicking your clit back and forth at a relentless pace, while one of his hands leaves your thighs to pull your folds apart and circle at your entrance. He immediately pushes it in, easily despite how thick his fingers were due to how slick you were, and the pressure has you letting out a high-pitched whine.
Your thighs were absolutely aching, feet starting to slip from the sweat forming all over your body and getting onto the counter, so you finally let your legs fall forward to place your thighs on his wide shoulders.
Jesse takes it in stride, as he does most things, and begins to suck earnestly at your clit while his finger thrusts into you, working and stretching you open so you were ready for his cock.
The thought of him fucking you, bending you over in the open air of the kitchen, has you squeezing your thighs around Jesse’s head and coming hard into his mouth. You writhe on the counter, hips bucking, but his firm grip on your thigh keeps you steady as he works you through it, tongue gentler as he runs it flat against your clit.
He doesn’t let up, that asshole, when your thighs start twitching around his head from the overstimulation. You let out a strangled noise, brain feeling foggy, as you tug at his hair to pull him up and away from your spent pussy.
When he’s face to face with you, the sight of your slick covering the entire bottom half of his face has you clenching around his finger where he still has it slowly fucking in and out of you. His eyes are tender, if not a little wild, and there’s an unbearably sexy smirk on his swollen lips, his tongue coming out to swipe around his mouth. As if he couldn’t get enough of you.
You’re surging forward, capturing his lips with yours, and the taste of yourself on his tongue has you moaning into his mouth, wrapping your thighs around his hips to pull him closer against you.
He eagerly reciprocates, tongue swiping in your mouth while he ruts against your inner thigh. You could feel the heat of his cock and how hard he was through his jeans, and you’re sure if you looked down, you’d be able to spot where his precum has bled through the fabric.
He begins to trail kisses alongside your jawline until he’s nipping at the spot underneath your ear that has your knees weak. Your own slick on his face, smearing against your cheeks, has your face heating up. “Ready to take my cock, baby?”
“God, yes.” And you’re just about to drop down off the counter so you could bend over and wag your bare ass in his face, before he stops you with a firm hand on your thigh.
Before you could ask him, he’s tugging you forward until your ass was hanging off the counter and begins unbuckling his belt. His eyes find yours, ablaze with hunger, as he rasps in a low voice, “I want to see you.”
Your heart thuds painfully in your chest. You don’t know what to say, what you could say, so you don’t say anything at all and instead lift the hem of your shirt and off, tossing it haphazardly to the floor.
Jesse groans at that, eyes immediately drawn to your breasts and the way your nipples instantly pebble in the cold air. He mutters an expletive before dropping his head to wrap his plush lips around one, as if he couldn’t help himself.
You let out a soft sigh, arousal already starting to flare up so soon after you came in his mouth, and you bring your arms to wrap around his shoulders, your knees to wrap around his waist. He’s so fucking broad, strong, unbearably handsome, yet his warm mouth on you is gentle as he swirls his tongue around your nipple.
He releases your swollen bud with a lewd pop, sitting up straighter so he could lean his forehead against yours as he shoves his jeans and briefs down until they bunch up around his thighs. His cock springs free, slapping against his black shirt and leaving a trail of sticky precum. Your mouth waters when he wraps a hand around the base of his cock, head flushed a pretty pink that was begging to be tasted.
He swipes the head between your folds, smearing his precum around and mixing with your slick that was steadily leaking out of you, before notching at your entrance and glancing up at you. You give him a slight nod, barely a tilt of your chin, and then he’s pushing into you slowly.
The stretch is immediate, his finger thick but not thick enough, and it’s bordering on too much despite how needy you felt, nearly aching for his cock. Your hands grip his shoulders, his muscles tensing a small comfort as he strains not to immediately fuck into you.
“Fuck,” Jesse groans, once he’s buried all the way inside of you. “Been thinking about this pussy all day.”
You let out a pathetic whine, hoping he would get the message you were trying to convey that you were running out of time but also he needed to hurry up and fuck you already.
“I know, I know,” he mutters, tone nearly condescending enough that had you clenching around him. He huffs a laugh at that, a hand coming to rest at the small of your back where the counter was digging into you and hikes your legs up higher on his hips.
The new angle has his cock pushing in deeper, and the low, drawn-out groan that you emit takes you by surprise.
“There she is,” he coos. He draws his hips back, carefully, and then he’s fucking back into you hard, punching a gasp out of your chest.
He finally starts a steady pace, one that has your body nearly going limp in his arms and your eyes rolling back in your head. The flesh of his skin slapping against yours and the lewd noises of your soaked cunt swallowing his cock with each thrust fills your ears, broken with Jesse’s heavy grunts.
You’re not even aware of the depraved sounds you were making—breathy whines and strangled noises each time he plunges into you, filling you up over and over again.
“Fuck, your pussy feels so,” he grinds into you, barely swiveling his hips yet causing you to gasp wetly as your hand comes down to claw at his chest. “Fucking good.”
He shuffles closer to you, his hips flush against the back of your thighs, and you thank God that you conveniently moved into an old house with low counters as he hovers over you, broad and solid.
Jesse’s hair continuously falls into his eyes, causing him to swipe at it several times in annoyance. When you follow his gaze, you notice with a thrill that he’s staring at where your bodies meet, and you don’t blame him.
The sight of his cock, shiny with your slick, as he continued to pump into you, your walls clenching and unclenching with every thrust, was heady. Filthy, even. It has your skin growing hot, pressure tightly building again despite feeling like you didn’t have the brain capacity to come again.
The hem of his shirt flutters in your eyeline and Jesse swiftly tugs at it until the fabric is bunched around underneath his armpits, exposing his abs and the way they flexed every time his hips snapped against you.
You lick your lips as your hand drops from where you were clutching at the fabric of his shirt to skim along his abs, sensing the way his muscles shifted and tightened.
God, was he sexy. Broad chest, strong arms, and a thick cock that he knew how to use that had you nearly drooling every time he walked by? You’re not sure how you got so fucking lucky.
“Always take my cock so good, baby,” he grunts, eyes meeting yours before dropping down to the way your tits were bouncing with each thrust. His free hand comes to grope at one of your breasts, squeezing and thumbing at your nipple, and drinking in the way you arch your back into his touch as best as you could with his other hand still protecting your back.
“Jesse, fuck—” you gasp as he picks up a desperate pace. You could tell he was close, most likely been on the brink as soon as he pushed himself inside of you and felt your walls clench around him, but he was holding back. Waiting for you.
His hand drops from your breast to snake in between your legs, causing your breath to get caught in your chest. The steady amount of slick dripping from you made his thumb glide easily in between your folds before circling precisely around your clit.
It’s nearly instantaneous the way your body locks up, thighs tightening from where they’re still hitched around his hips and your hand stilling where you were lightly tracing the contours of his stomach. Your mouth falls open, eyes glassy as you meet Jesse’s.
He curses and then he’s maneuvering you closer, grabbing a hold of your thighs and pushing them back until your knees were pressed into your chest. If possible, his cock slides in deeper, the weight of him as he hovers you becoming heavier. It’s all so fucking good, you’re nearly dizzy from how fast that familiar tightness begins to coil in the pit of your stomach.
“I always take care of my girl, don’t I, baby?” he pants into your open mouth, face merely inches away from yours. He’s relentless, fucking you and splitting you open over and over, you have no choice but to take it.
“Yes, yes—” you gasp, mind going foggy. Your arms come up to wrap around the back of your knees, hand grasping weakly at his forearm. You were so fucking close.
“That’s it, come on,” he whispers raggedly. The low timbre of his voice, smooth and breathless, and the intensity of his gaze melts into you. “That’s my pretty girl.”
Something cold and sharp was digging into your lower back, and when you blink down, you notice that Jesse’s jeans were still bunched around his thighs. The sight of him still in his clothes while you were completely bare and exposed on your kitchen counter had squeezing your eyes shut, fire burning underneath your skin.
You cry out as your orgasm finally hits you with a particular hard brush of his thumb against your clit. You feel yourself clench around him, causing him to bite out a curse, as your hips stutter against his and your thighs tremble.
That’s all that Jesse needs as his thrusts falter, turning more erratic before he’s burying his face into your neck, jerking forward and coming into you with a low, broken groan. His cock twitches inside of you, making you let out a whimper as you can feel his hot come fill you up and threaten to drip out of your aching pussy.
Both of you lay there for a moment, catching your breaths, before Jesse tilts his head to brush his lips against your jawline. Your hair flutters with every exhale. “Are you okay?”
You nod, still feeling dazed, as your throat swallows from how dry it was. “Never better.”
“Good.” He snakes his arms around you so you’re sitting up alongside him when he leans back, placing you gently until you were sitting with your bare ass on the counter.
When he steps back, hissing as his softening cock slides out of you, you let out a soft moan at the sudden emptiness. He quickly leans over you to grab a fresh dishrag, tenderly cleaning you up before tossing the rag to the side.
When you blink up at him, there’s a slight flush to his neck, sweat gathering at his hairline. He shakes out his hand that was placed behind you, shielding you from the sharp edge of the countertop, and you feel a surge of affection when you notice the red lines adorning the top of his hand.
You take his hand in yours to rub at, the roughness of his skin contrasting against yours. “You didn’t have to do that.”
Jesse leans in, nosing at your hairline before pressing a chaste kiss to your temple. “I said I’d take care of you, didn’t I?”
You flush at the words, feeling a sudden spark of arousal between your thighs.
Jesse feels the way you attempt to clench your thighs together, still on either side of his hips, and he laughs softly. He steps back to get dressed, easily, since he literally only needed to pull up his pants, however you stay rooted to the spot, taking the opportunity to admire him.
When he notices you’re making no move to get dressed, he rolls his eyes fondly. He stretches a hand out to you, helping you jump down from the countertop but also because he knew how weak in the legs you get after he fucks your brains out. And he’s right, as you nearly plant face first onto the floor when your knees buckle as soon as you step down.
Of course he catches you with a hand around your waist, his thick fingers warm against your skin. He tugs you in close, nearly tucking you into his chest, and the fabric of his clothes against your bare skin causes you to shiver. He starts to rub his hand up and down your side, naturally assuming you were cold.
Handsome, strong, protective, and affectionate. You’re going to keep him forever.
“Come on you, I still have to get you something from the mess hall.”
I just had this idea. I like the hc that for the clones, if their commanding officer calls them by their number = your mom calling you by your full name.
Could you do one when their SO calls them by their number, and they just know they are in trouble 😭🙏
Clones x gn reader: you calling them by their number
warnings: none
A/N: ahhh that's such a fun idea!! i hc that some of them have a really complicated relationship with their numbers so you might be on thin ice with that one xD
comments and reblogs are very appreaciated!! :D
The Bad Batch
Hunter
"CT-9901"
"What?!" Hunter's voice is biting. He hates whenever his number is used. It reminds him that he's supposed to be defective, even if he doesn't feel like it. It has been used against his squad way too many times. But then he notices little signs of your body, how tense you are, your heartbeat that is way too fast, your breathing…
Hunter takes a breath, running a hand through his hair and putting the knife he'd been sharpening down. "Don't," he mutters, more to himself as a warning. He knows he's about to say something stupid, he already did by the looks of it. He doesn't need to make it worse.
Tech
"CT-9902"
"That would be my designation. Is there a reason you are using it instead of my name?" Tech readjusts his googles for the tenth time in the last few minutes. The two of you had engaged in a heated argument about certain comments he was making that he did not see a problem with and he refusea to listen to another perspective.
You think maybe using the number would make him at least pause, let you get a word in, and seemingly it does.
Tech knows something was wrong when you used his number because it sounds so similar to the regs and Kaminoans using it whenever he annoyed them but you are different. You know that and you have never used it this way before so that could only mean one thing; you were pissed. Royally.
Tech put his datapad down, turning his full attention towards you. He cannot undo the words he's said but he can at least listen from now. "Explain my error. I will listen now."
Wrecker
"CT-9903"
Wrecker stops. He hadn't heard his number in a long time. With the batch having numbers this similar, they are rarely used and his name is just something that fit him quite well so for you to use it…
"Oh… I'm sorry. Did I do something wrong?" His voice turns quieter, softer. He drops the crate he is holding. It was fine, nothing fragile anyway. You are more important. Wrecker tries to wrack his brain about what he did wrong. "I'm sorry. I… really am. Uhm, I don't know what I did wrong but— I'm sorry."
Crosshair
"CT-9904"
He snaps to attention immediately, his mouth audibly clicking shut. He hasn't heard his number ever since he defected from the Empire and you know it was something he avoided thinking about as much as possible.
So for you to use it against him, he knows he fucked up but he doesn't know how to react. On one hand, he wants to apologise and make it right but on the other hand, that number triggered him in a way that leaves him unbalanced.
"That's low," Crosshair's voice is razor-thin but there's no anger in his eyes, just something raw and wounded. "If you want me to listen, fine. But don't use their language against me."
Echo
"CT-1409"
Once those numbers left your mouth, Echo froze. The only time it is ever used these days is in medical settings and those always left him hollow afterwards. He stares at the floor for a few seconds, processing.
When he looks up, his expression is tired. Not angry. Just… exhausted.
“Wow,” he says softly. “Okay. I deserved that.” He runs a hand over his head. “I’ll fix it. Whatever it was. Just… please don’t do that again. I hear those numbers in my nightmares enough as it is.”
Commanders
Wolffe
"CC-3636"
Wolffe goes rigid. He's used to being called "Commander" or "Sir" by his men. But for you he has always been just "Wolffe". He scans your expression with narrowed eyes.
"Want to run that by me again?" he growls, but there's flicker of unease beneath the gruff exterior. He crosses his arms, a defensive posture. He knows he’s been difficult lately. He just didn’t think you’d notice — or care — enough to pull this card.
Fox
"CC-1010"
Fox flinches. Actually flinches.
His number was a curse. It’s the number on the report every time a Corrie Guard falls. It’s the number Palpatine’s office used to summon him at 3 AM. Hearing it from your lips feels like a betrayal.
He doesn’t get angry. He just looks… defeated. He pulls his helmet back on, the visor hiding his eyes. “Message received,” he says, his voice flat and filtered through the comms. “Loud and clear.”
Cody
"CC-2224"
Cody stops writing his report. He sets the stylus down with a deliberate click. He turns in his chair, looking at you with that calm, measured gaze that all great commanders seem to have. He’s not scared. You two have had fights and arguments before and have resolved them all just fine.
That you used his number was new, and it made him pause but also want to listen to you more.
"Alright. That serious, is it?" He asks quietly. He doesn't apologize yet, he doesn't know what for yet, but he's giving you his full undivided attention. "Well, talk to me, dear. I'm listening."
501st
Rex
"CT-7567"
Rex blinks once. Twice. He carefully sets his helmet on the table a gesture of surrender. He knows that if you’re bringing out the number, this isn’t a battle he’s going to win with authority.
“Alright, mesh’la,” he says, holding up his hands. “You got me. What’d I do?” He’s trying to keep his tone light, but his ears are slightly red. He hates being reminded that he’s a number to the GAR. To you, he wants to be just Rex.
Fives
"CT-5555"
"Yes, that's my full name, you know you can just say Fives to save time," Fives replies, ever the cocky one. But you don't laugh, don't even smile like usually. You just glare.
His smile falters. Then it dies completely. He pushes off the wall, suddenly serious. “Oh.” He swallows hard. “It’s like that, is it?” He rubs the back of his neck, suddenly looking very young. “I’ll, uh… I’ll just go wait in the barracks until you’re ready to talk. Or yell. Whichever you feel like.”
Jesse
"CT-5597"
Jesse freezes mid-laugh. He was just joking around with Kix, but the sound of his number, sharp and cold, cuts through the noise like a vibroblade.
He turns slowly, his shoulders tensing. "Is there a problem?" he asks, his voice slipping into a more neutral and respectful tone. He’s slipped into ‘soldier mode’ to protect himself from the emotional whiplash.
Kix
"CT-6116"
Kix sighs. A deep, world-weary sigh that only the medic of the 501st can truly master.
He sets down his medical kit and crosses over to you. He doesn’t look scared or angry, he's wrestled so many delirious soldiers that the difference between his name and number didn't mean much to him on days like these.
He gently takes your chin, tilting your head to check your pupils. “Your blood pressure is up. Talk to me.”
Hardcase
He doesn't get it at first when you say his number, turning towards you with a smile. "Yep, that's my number. Did you memorize it? That's so sweet!"
It takes him a full five seconds to see the look on your face. Then his energetic bouncing stops and his eyes go wide. “Oh. Oh no. I’m in trouble, aren’t I? Is it the explosives? I bet it was the explosive. I swear it wasn't my fault I can fix it tho—"
Dogma
"CT-6922"
Dogma stands up even straighter, which feels almost impossible since he always stands at attention. He responds to his number like a droid to a command. "Yes?"
But then he sees the fury in your eyes, the disappointment and his gaze falls to his boots, realising that it's you he disappointed and that's somehow worse than facing the disappointemnt of authority. "I see…" he says quietly. "What did I do wrong?"
Tup
"CT-5385"
Tup’s bottom lip trembles slightly. He’s so sensitive, so eager to please. Hearing his number from you feels like a physical blow. He sets down the little droid he was tinkering with and walks over to you, his brown eyes wide and glossy.
“I’m sorry,” he whispers, not even knowing what for. “I don’t like that. It sounds wrong when you say it.” You already feel bad having ever used the number.
Misc.
Howzer
He pauses with his cup of caf halfway to his lips as you say his number. He doesn't get defensive or flinch. He just sets the cup down and looks at you with those steady, honest eyes. The scar on his cheek pulls slightly as he offers a small smile.
“That bad, huh?” He holds out his hand to you. “Come here. If you’re pulling out the designation, then I deserve whatever lecture is coming. But can we do it sitting down? I have a feeling it’s a long one.”
the first time you saw jesse this morning, he didn't look at you but you still greet him like any other colleague.
"morning!" as you went to the station beside him to take a look at the patient board.
"morning," he replied just as softly, still not looking at you.
you didn't really mind it was like that. your relationship is new and no one else knew about it, it has been 2 months since jesse asked you out after a hectic shift.
when he left and passed you, you felt the subtle feeling of his hand brushing against yours.
it was very quick, your heart skipped a beat.
you didn't show any reaction, didn't look at him.
but you suppressed a smile, trying to hide your joy.
it became a routine. no lingering, he doesn't stand too close when you were nearby. you don't talk to him unless it was about work.
but you noticed the small things jesse did. he gave you his third pen of the week because you lost yours. a sandwich that you have been craving, suddenly in your locker even when you didn't ask for it.
you also noticed how just slightly his voice went softer whenever he talks to you, of course, about work.
6 hours into your shift, you went to grab items that needed to be restocked from the supply closet and after a minute, jesse followed and slipped in soundlessly.
you hear the door closed and turned around. you didn't really expect that jesse would follow you at this time.
"hey you sly fox," you remarked as you saw his silver curls.
"hey babe," he stepped closer to you and held your hand. fingers slipping into yours like it was natural.
"is the door closed? properly?" you titled your head towards the door, trying to grab the handle.
"oookay, you. are. paranoid. don't ruin the moment. i locked the door," he answered and pulled you back by your arm to hug you.
"you okay?"
"yeah, i am now."
you sighed as you take in the smell of his cologne. "we're still on for dinner right? at my place?"
"the only thing i'm looking forward to today, baby."
your shift ended earlier than usual. you grabbed your things from the locker and were ready to spend the rest of the night with jesse.
"hey, wanna come have a drink? by the benches outside. like usual." it was nurse kim, your colleague. you saw mateo and princess looking at you, waiting for an answer.
you hesitated a bit, remembering your plans with your secret boyfriend, who is also their colleague.
"i uh–, sorry im gonna go straight home! have plans with my couch plus food tonight," technically it wasn't a lie. you just didn’t say that you have company.
"sure! but next time you're coming with us."
you laughed as you bid your goodbyes and went home.
once you were there, you cleaned yourself up and put on something comfortable for the night.
and you waited.
your phone dinged twice, it was from jesse.
jesse: hey im outside
jesse: come and get me quickkkk. why do you live close to the hospital where we work!!!!
you laughed as you saw the text. you sent a quick reply and went to get him.
while having your dinner, you shared conversations about your shift that morning, showing off the rare cases each other had and spilled any new gossips in the hospital (none of them were about the two of you.)
after cleaning up the dishes and table, he dragged you by your hand, up towards the stairs into your bedroom and made you sit on the bed.
he sighed loudly, "god, finally."
he climbed to join you and had his back on headboard, you almost lunged onto him as you place the side of your face to his chest.
you could hear his calm heartbeat.
for a moment, it was peaceful. no chaos, no dramas. no secrets to hide.
you pulled away to look at him properly, hands dropped on the side of his body.
"do you.." you hesitated, "do you think they know? about us?"
"who?"
"i don't know? uh– dana or robby? everyone else.."
he rubbed your arm to reassure you after he heard the worry in your tone.
"i trust that they don't know. we actually managed it well, babe. but maybe dana suspected it.. she looked at me funny but didn't say anything though."
there was a pause from you, you stared down on your hands.
"do you want them to know?" he asked again.
"maybe? i just.. hate to pretend," you said as you draw circles against his chest. "but i also don't want things to change.. it's so perfect now."
"well, if things get complicated, you know we can deal with it together, yeah?" he was really good at reassuring you from your anxious thoughts.
"yeah.. thanks jesse," now you had your face buried in his chest. his response was quite overwhelming to you so you tried to hide it.
"don't worry about it, we are okay." as he wrapped his arms around you.
you let yourself relax into his hold, silencing the noise in your head. you think that he is right and you believed him.
you closed your eyes, letting you rest after the day you had. your heart at ease knowing jesse van horn was there with you.
Hello, can i ask this here but for the tiktok vid🥺 (im shy and this is the first time i request someone's cuz your writing is too tempting)
'how will the clones act when you jump on their back out of nowhere' i think it's kinda cute 🥹🥹 i think i saw this trend on tiktok.
P.s. I really really loves your HCs and also your oc fics on ao3😭💕 You write their personalities literally PERFECT! Thank you for all your hard work and being a backbone of clones-girlies🥺💝💗🎀💗🎀💗💝
clones when you jump on their back (my headcanons)
a/n: this is so sweet thank youu! i clutch my heart every time someone mentions my oc fics, i appreciate this so much! i tried to look for this trend on tiktok but i couldn't find it, idk if it's just not trending anymore lolol lowk that's my fault for not seeing this sooner, so my apologies!! i assume that you wanted this to be a video but im lowkey beefing w the tiktok algorithm/guidelines rn so i hope it’s ok that i just posted this here <3
gn reader
warnings: some maturity for fives’ part lol
the bad batch
hunter has the instinct to worry about you even though this is just an innocent prank. he squeezes the underside of your thighs when you wrap your legs around him and rest the side of your face against his backside. “you feeling alright?” he asks softly, rubbing slow circles just below your ass, “tired?” you giggle at his concern and shake your head. kissing the back of his neck, you tell him, “just felt like surprising you.” he chuckles under his breath and starts walking forward, carrying you to wherever you need to go. “consider me surprised, then.”
tech is caught off guard but still prepared to react. he drops everything he’s holding to make sure you don’t slip off, and his hands wrap around the back of your thighs firmly. he doesn’t seem to care that his datapad and random tools clatter to the ground, more focused on you as he says, “well this is certainly a surprise.” you lean over his shoulder and kiss him on the cheek, laughing softly. “sorry, did i scare you?” he shakes his head and calmly bends to the floor to pick up his belongings with you still on his back like you weigh nothing to him. “not at all,” he smiles to himself.
wrecker is built for any surprise weight; he’s like a wall when you jump on him, unfazed other than his loud laughter as he grabs your ass to push you up higher. he loves when you sneak up on him to give him any sort of affection, it’s these little moments that he cherishes every day. “hold on tight,” he warns you humorously, and you’re unsure why until he starts using you as a workout, showing off with effortless lunges and squats to remind you that he’s your big strong man.
crosshair catches you without so much of a twitch in his expression, using one arm to hook under your knees as the other balances his sniper against his body. “careful,” he drawls, “you’ll hurt yourself.” you nuzzle your nose affectionately against the side of his face, whispering, “not if you don’t drop me.” he smirks and loosens his grip on your leg ever so slightly, causing the smallest slip that makes you grab onto his shoulders instinctively. but you know he would never actually let you fall.
echo reacts with wide eyes and adjusts his stance to anticipate your weight, laughing, “woah, alright…” as you wrap yourself around him from behind. he glances at you over his shoulder with a softening gaze. “something get you excited or are you just happy to see me?” you lean forward and catch his lips in a brief kiss before pressing your forehead to his. “just happy to see you,” you whisper to him. he chuckles and kisses you again. “i was hoping you’d say that.”
commanders
wolffe doesn’t have a huge reaction; you almost expect him to be annoyed at first, if anything, but he simply squeezes the back of your thighs as you get comfortable, quietly sinking into this moment. he’s not the type to melt into touch that easily—you’re the exception, and you’re extra glad that you are when he silently tilts his head against yours. he closes his eyes, completely still other than his heart that thrums hard and strong in his chest. you feel the quick pace, the sign that you get him this riled up even though he’s good at hiding it. but his body doesn’t lie, and it fits perfectly against yours.
fox looks up at you with furrowed eyebrows and says, “can i help you?” in that stern tone of his, but you’re used to his irritable nature, and you always do well to calm it with a soft kiss to his forehead. “would it kill you to be a little romantic from time to time?” you tease him, pinching his cheek. his gaze softens as a laugh escapes his exhale. “it might,” he mutters and takes your arms to wrap them around his neck, making sure you’re holding onto him tight.
cody’s crazy combat instincts kick-in, but he’s a lot more gentle with you than the droids he deals with on the battlefield. you squeal as he flips you over his shoulder and catches you before you hit the ground, carrying you bridal style. you stare at him in disbelief, “what the hell?” and he chuckles a little sheepishly before kissing your forehead. “sorry, didn’t mean to scare you.” you circle your arms around his neck. “i’ll forgive you if you kiss me again.” his lips quirk up in amusement, and he squeezes your body into his chest to feel you closer, kissing you deeper this time.
501st
rex chuckles and asks, “what’s gotten you so excited?” you lean closer with an innocent sing-song. “nothing…” and he turns over his shoulder to look at you, raising his eyebrows and smiling in amusement. this gives you the perfect opportunity to lower your mouth onto his, and he hums under his breath as he deepens the kiss, angling his head to catch your lips wider, but he can only move his neck so far. “come down here and give me a real kiss,” he murmurs.
fives pushes up on your legs immediately, grinning ear to ear as your arms come around his neck. “legs not working today, huh?” he snickers under his breath, and you know it’s a dirty joke with the cheeky depth of his voice and the way his fingers slowly inch up your inner thighs from the back, tracing dangerously near the soreness from last night. you roll your eyes and drop your fist to his hard shoulder in scorn, but he just laughs louder and holds you close.
kix smiles, happy to feel your weight against him like a protective, affectionate shell. your hands are splayed over his chest, and he reaches back to pat them softly, intertwining your fingers lazily to bring them to his mouth for gentle kisses. they feel ticklish, brushing over your skin with careful precision, like you’re a delicate little thing and he doesn’t want to hurt you. he breathes out a noise of surprised laughter when you start touching him under his chin and near his jawline, scratching and caressing as you both get lost in the intimacy of this moment.
jesse is more easily startled than he lets on, and his dramatic ass acts like you just tried to tackle him to the ground. he holds you strong and steady, though, looking up at you with adrenaline widening his eyes. “give me a warning next time,” he laughs. “what’s the fun in that?” you tease, leaning down to kiss him. his eyes flutter shut as he melts into your kiss, and he thinks he could definitely get used to this kind of surprise.
hardcase feels you leap onto his back and grabs the underside of your thighs, hoisting you up against him more securely. and then, like the burst of energy he is, he takes off running with you in his arms. you laugh and squirm against him, squealing, “hardcase—put me down!” but he doesn’t until you give him a kiss on the cheek, and even then he still has a few tricks up his sleeve, waiting for your feet to hit the ground again before he turns around and surges toward you, bending down with his arms coming around your waist to toss you over his shoulder playfully.
request guidelines | fic list | tumblr hc list | tiktok hc list
Warnings: this is pure filth, porn with no plot, handjob, fingering, talks about sex, smut, kissing, making out, cursing, male anatomy, female anatomy, virgin reader, innocence kink (i think?), virginity kink (is that a thing?), weed, being high, vulgar language, no use of y/n, not proofread
Word count: 2,2K
a/n: this is so random but i needed to write about him, so yeah
You knew about sex. Well, in a broad sense anyway. You knew how it worked and the consequences that came with it but you'd never actually done anything other than touching yourself.
Maybe it was the weed.
Maybe it was the crush you'd been harboring for Jessie for the past year.
It didn’t matter what caused it, the fact is that the words had left your mouth and now you couldn’t take it back.
“Can I see your dick?”
You expected Jesse to jump from the couch and look at you like some sort of pervert. But he surprised you.
“It's not hard.”
Maybe his brain was foggy with weed too.
“So what?”
“So it's not nice to-um-look at, I guess.”
He gave you a small shrug, looking at nothing in particular but actively avoiding your gaze.
“Dina’s never seen it soft?”
Jesse recoiled a bit at the mention of Dina and you immediately regretted bringing her up.
“Sorry. I’m just curious, I've never…”
You forced yourself to stop talking, opting to pick at your shoes instead.
“You’re a virgin?”
He didn’t ask like he was judging, he asked like he was genuinely surprised. Your heart sped up a bit. Had he revealed something to you just now? Or was it just in your head?
“Yeah.”
Jesse stayed quiet for a moment, thinking about something as he stared off into space. He was struggling to decide what was or not appropriate to say. You’d started this conversation but he didn’t want to make you uncomfortable by accident. He didn’t know how “innocent” you were.
“Normally people only see it when it's already hard.”
You bit into your cheek, nodding in understanding. No one had ever told you that but it did make sense with the little knowledge you had.
Jesse watched you think for a second. His eyes scanned your body. You seemed calm but that could be because of the weed. You turned to look at him, your eyes catching the way his eyes raked over your body. Ok so you definitely weren't imagining things. There was something there. But just how far would Jesse let you go?
You intended to find out.
“If i made it hard would you show me?”
You where already starting to make him hard with all your fucking questions. His brain took every word that slipped from your mouth and turned it into a dirty little fantasy. Harmless but very effective. He hesitated for a bit but then the horniness got to him and he simply nodded at you.
“Yeah ok.”
You lifted off your spot on the floor, moving towards him. He shifted on the couch, moving so that he was sitting instead of laying down. You stopped when you got in front of him, hands unconsciously tugging at your jacket. Jesse waited, his eyes moving over your body until they reached your face. You looked at him with wide eyes. It was then that he realised you were waiting for him to tell you what to do.
“Have you ever made out with someone?”
“Like kissing them? Yeah I've kissed people Jesse, I'm not that inexperienced.”
Jesse sighed. He hadn’t meant for it to sound like he didn’t think you could manage to have someone want to kiss you, but by the way you’d crossed your arms in front of your chest he could tell he’d touched a nerve.
He rose from his spot, closing the distance between the two of you. You took a step back at the action, not because you didn’t want him close but because you didn’t know what to expect from him. Jesse noticed the uncertainty in your eyes.
“Hey it’s ok. It’s just me.”
You nodded, allowing him to move closer. His hand found your cheek, his thumb running over the skin as he spoke.
“There's a difference between kissing and making out. That’s why I asked.”
Before you could answer he leaned down. His lips found yours, placing a small kiss to them before backing away.
“That’s a kiss.”
His hand moved to rest on your waist, pulling you flush against his body. His lips crashed into yours, hands trying to tug you impossibly closer. Your heart was beating so fast it was the only thing you could focus on. This was so different from the gentle kiss he’d just given you. This was hungry. Carnal.
Your body reached for him in desperation, arms moving to wrap around his neck as he deepened the kiss. His hands squeezed your hips before shifting to your ass. You gasped at the movement and Jesse took it as his opportunity to shove his tongue in your mouth.
When he finally pulled away you were gasping for air. Your chest heaved with every breath, lips swollen as you stared up at him like he’d just shown you the secrets of the universe. He couldn’t help but smile at your expression.
“So, I take it you’ve never made out with anyone.”
“No I've never done…that.”
A laugh slipped from your mouth before you could help it. Jesse joined in, his hands never leaving your body. When you both got your laughing fit in controle you leaned into him, placing a kiss to his lips. Your mouth chased his as he moved away, a small whine leaving you. Jesse’s dick twitched at the sound. It didn’t help that you were practically pouting at him.
“It’s easier if you're sitting down.”
“Okay.”
You watched him move back to the couch. He took a seat, manspreading as he stared up at you. You took a step forward, hesitating for a moment before placing one knee on the couch. Jesse nodded his head at you, approving your movements, so you continued. You settled on his lap, hands resting on his shoulders. Jesse's hands rested on your hips as he waited to see what you would do. Your eyes moved from his mouth to his neck, tongue moving out to wet your lips.
“Can I try something?”
“Of course.”
“And you’ll tell me if it's bad?”
“If you want me to.”
“I do.”
“Then yeah, I will.”
Satisfied, you leaned down. Your lips found his neck with caution, placing small pecks to the skin. Jesse shifted beneath you, head moving to the side to give you more access. You took that as a sign to keep going.
Your kisses became more confident and Jesse responded to every single one. When you finally found his sweet spot he let out a groan, hips bucking up into you. The action caused you to stop licking at his neck. Jesse's eyes snapped open when he felt you pull away from him.
“What is it?”
“You’re hard.”
He had completely forgotten about how all this had started. But you were right, he was hard.
“Does that mean I did it right?”
Jesse smiled at you before he could help it. He tugged you into a kiss and you accepted it. You ground down into him, searching for relief without even knowing why you were doing it. Jesse pulled away, his forehead resting on yours.
“So…can I see now?”
He had promised and Jesse was a man of his word.
“Yeah. Do you want me to take it out or do you wanna do it yourself?”
“You can do it.”
“Okay. Move back a bit.”
You did as he asked, shifting slightly on his lap so that he could reach his pants with more ease. Your eyes followed every movement. He moved slowly, drawing the moment out longer than necessary. You could tell he was doing it on purpose. Just as you were going to scold him his dick sprang free.
Your lips parted in confusion, head tilting to the side as you took in the sight before you. It wasn’t pretty. It looked kind of weird actually. But you felt a desire to sit on it.
How strange.
Jesse watched you take it in. He could see the wheels turning in your mind. He hadn't expected you to scream out in joy or anything but the silent observation was killing him.
“Can I touch it?”
“Sure.”
Your hand moved to grab his dick. Jesse hissed at your skin met his, causing you to look up at him.
“Did that hurt?”
“Not exactly, it's just sensitive”
You gave him a tentative stroke. Jesse's head fell back onto the couch with a small pant so you repeated the action.
“Is it true that people put it in their mouth?”
“Yeah its-shit- that's a blowjob.”
“Is it good?”
“Very.”
“Better than this?”
Your hand hasn't stopped moving as you spoke and Jesse was finding it harder and harder to keep his voice leveled.
“Much.”
“Do you want me to? Put it in my mouth I mean.”
Oh, he so very much wanted that. But not right now. Right now he wanted to show you he could make you feel good too. So despite his brain yelling at him to say yes he moved to grab onto your hand. You gazed up at him as his hand warped around yours, stilling your movements.
“Maybe another time. Can I show you something instead?”
“Okay.”
Jesse's hand moved to your pants, looking up at you in a silent question. You understood his request. Once you’d nodded your okay, Jesse unbuttoned your pants and pulled your zipper down. You were already panting from the anticipation. When his fingers found your folds a moan ripped itself from your throat. You’ve touched yourself before but it felt so different when it was someone else doing it. Jesse's fingers were thicker than yours so the feeling of fullness was more predominant.
“Jesse it's…oh wow.”
“Fuck you’re wet.”
He added another digit and you gasped.
“Just wait till you feel my dick.”
You clenched at his words and Jesse couldn’t help but smile.
“You want that huh? Want me to fuck you?”
You were nodding with all your might, fingers gripping onto his shoulder as he continued to finger you.
“Can I sit on it?”
“Next time. It’s better to be laying down for the first time.”
“Okay.”
“I need you to cum first though ok?”
You nodded, allowing your head to rest on his shoulder. Your hips rocked against his fingers, searching for your release. When his thumb found your clit you were gone.
You fisted at his shirt, mouth opening to release a moan of his name as you gushed onto his fingers. Your body sagged into his completely as you reached your high. Jesse placed a kiss on your shoulder as he removed his fingers from inside you.
“You want a taste?”
As curious as you were, your body was too tired to focus on anything other than the sudden euphoria that has washed through it. So you shook your head. Jesse moved his fingers away from your face, shoving them into his mouth before licking them clean. You watched the action, clenching around nothing.
You looked down at Jesse's crouch, finding him still rock hard, possibly even more than he ahd been when you’d been touching him. Jesse caught onto your stare, hands moving to wrap around your chin. He lifted your head so that you were looking into his eyes.
“Do you really want it to be me, or were you just saying it because my fingers felt good?”
“Not just because of that. I like you Jesse and I trust you. I want it to be you. If that's alright with you I mean.”
“It's more than alright with me.”
He gave you a loving kiss, shifting around so that he could tug you out of his lap and lay you down on the couch. You spread your legs for him, allowing him to slot between them.
“It’ll hurt a bit at the start but it gets better. And if you want me to slow down or stop you tell me ok?”
“I will.”
“Good. You ready?”
“Hu huh.”
Jesse was right at first it stung, even with how slowly he was entering you the discomfort was present. Your brows furrowed and Jesse noticed. He moved to caress your thighs, trying to pull your attention away from the pain. It worked well. Before you knew it the pain had turned into pleasure.
Jesse started rocking into you slowly. With every move you gasped, hands clawing onto his back. That only spurred him on. His movements became more erratic, his whines louder. He was trying to be a gentleman but you kept clenching around him like a vice.
His head fell onto your shoulder, hips moving faster and faster with each of your moans. You could feel the pressure in your stomach. The more he moved the closer it got to snapping. And then with one well placed thrust Jesse had you biting into his shoulder as you came.
It took everything in Jesse to not cum inside as your body threatened to swallow him whole but he managed. Afterwards the two of you lay in eachothers arms snuggling to keep the cold at bay.
“Do you think we’ll be here long?”
Jesse glanced out the window. The storm was still raging outside.
“At least a couple hours.”
“Does that mean we can go again?”
Jesse let out a laugh. He’d created a monster.
“Yeah we can go again.”
“Can I sit on it this time?”
“Sure. Just give me a couple minutes.”
“Alright.”
You settled on the couch nuzzling into Jesse, your body buzzing with the promise of what was to come.
read pt. 2 & pt. 3
summary: you go against the council’s verdict on avenging joel miller
pairing: tlou!jesse x fem!reader from don’t be tardy!
word count: 3.5k
trigger warnings: angst. swearing, kissing, character death, loss, reader suffers from survivors guilt thinking joel’s death was random, violence, blood.
a/n: not proofread! oh shit. here we go again! i enjoy writing for jesse rn hehe. this is sort of in sequence with don’t be tardy but it can be a stand alone as well tbh. following the show just cause i feel like it lmao xo
gif credit: @pedgito
Joel Miller was dead.
It seemed that Jesse had been accurate in his mild threat about the two more warnings in tow if you were late to patrol again. He was just as serious as Maria Miller when she brought you in, Tommy Miller sat shoulder to shoulder with her as she listed your flaws back to you in black and white. Tardiness didn't slide with the Jackson Commune and you were quick to be reminded when Maria Miller stripped you of your right to the morning patrol and every patrol there after.
The patrol that Joel Miller willingly took your spot from you.
You had meant to be out on horseback with either Dina or Jesse, or even Ellie if she hadn't selected one of the two. There had been a resurge in the Infected, numbers climbing at an alarming rate that was perceived as a threat for the Jackson Community.
It was meant to be you, but you had been delegated and in turn, had to sit through a meeting of the town to raise the red flag in the unlikely chances that the walls of haven Jackson would be breached and those fit for a fight would see it through.
Little time to mope over your reprimand by Maria Miller, the horde came as if Jackson were their home. The bells rang and shouts were heard from above whilst you were knee deep in shovelling manure for the crops. There was little preparation internally, as you hadn't believed such an outrageous idea to come true before your eyes, but the Infected soon showed you that Tommy Miller's forewarning rang true.
A gun shoved into your chest, you found a space above ground where you could pick them off.
It was a valiant fight, the Main Street of Jackson in ruins, a parade of dead littered the length of it — some of it your own people and others that had shredded the wall as if it were paper thin.
After providing what help you could to restore the dignity of the town residents by wrapping them in the linen cloth provided by the medical clinic, you had returned to your house to wash the scent of death off of your skin. A rifle left by the shower, you scrubbed at yourself until you were raw, tears brimming your eyes once the adrenaline of the fight against the dead had relinquished. You couldn't bear to close your eyes when the low pressured shower ran its meagre water over your face; scared to leave yourself vulnerable for the taking.
And then, Jesse came.
You had just turned the faucet off, when he crept in, boots surprisingly quiet but you supposed that was something he was good at. You had jumped with a squeal, hands flying to your rifle — Jesse getting to it before you could blow his brains out — your heart beating tenfold. There was no hint of sarcastic humour in the air, and you believed that to be due to his findings on the attack whilst he was on Patrol. And then, he told you about Joel Miller.
Sitting on it for awhile, you took what you could of the information and attempted to digest it. It would get lodged in your throat, eyes wide as you stared at your wall whilst Jesse took his turn to scrub his hands raw of Joel's blood.
It could have been you.
A senseless murder, a torturous one from Jesse's description to what he found at the abandoned Mansion. He had to pry Ellie Williams off Joel's body long enough to be able to wrap him up; no easy feat when a girl had just lost, essentially her father.
You blinked at the wall. If you had left for Patrol with Dina, that would have been you.
That thought remained at the back of your mind, a persistent niggle that etched so deep within the crevices of your brain, that it consumed you whole for three months. It clawed it's way to the forefront of your mind when you attended Joel's funeral — with the profound absence of Ellie — and as you watched the dirt scatter across his casket, there was an unquenchable thirst to make things right. That you wouldn’t rest until you had embedded at least one bullet in his killer's heads, as he was a man that was there at the wrong place at the wrong time.
Because of you.
You had managed to avoid therapy over it, your mask plausible enough that Gail Lynden had passed you with flying colours because, in theory, you weren't there to suffer from the trauma; or that's what she had discussed over a weak cup of tea and biscuits.
That didn’t mean that it wasn’t there. You were just better at hiding it than others.
Like Ellie.
After she had returned to the Jackson society, there was a newfound sense of anger you saw in her as she casually walked through Main Street on a mission. You thought about greeting her, maybe pushing for an awkward hug, but then you saw her face and knew best to steer clear until she came to you.
There wasn’t the closeness between the pair of you compared to her friendships with Jesse and Dina, however, you knew that you offered a refresher in unbiased opinions, often validating how she felt when the others attempted to stomp out her fire for the sake of peace.
“She’s brought an offer to the Council.” Jesse mumbled in the dark after you saw Ellie storming about that morning. You peeled your eyes open from the sleep that just evaded you and Jesse sighed, “She wants to go to Seattle — where those people who killed Joel are stationed — and, well, avenge him.”
Oh. That piqued your interest.
You turned to face Jesse, his hand absentmindedly trailing his fingers across your bicep to raise goosebumps from his touch.
“That. . . Would be good. Right?” You tested the waters, “They deserve it.”
Jesse remained silent — like he was listening to your heart pick up in its beating — before he continued, “Not everything needs to be followed up with violence. Joel is gone, I don’t think killing them will bring the peace Ellie thinks it will.”
“Hm.” You responded blankly.
“The Council Meeting will be held tomorrow. I gave her some advice tonight and I hope she doesn’t go rogue.” Jesse closed his eyes, “That would definitely turn the vote against her.”
You turned on your back as Jesse’s soft snores told you he fell asleep on the thought. Forefinger tapping against your stomach as you processed the information Jesse had just given you. This was the first you were hearing of a base where you could locate the killers, sometimes dating Jesse came with further perks such as releasing privy council information prior to the rest of Jackson knowing.
Head splitting from adrenaline, you found it hard to raise the sleep pressure up enough to fall back asleep.
This was the opportunity you had been waiting on.
—
"The council voted no." Jesse stated firmly.
You followed him, "Jesse—I know you love rules and regulations. But, this is about Joel. That's practically Ellie's dad, you saw what they did to him." The image haunted him, actually. "They deserve the violence Ellie has for them. He was like an uncle to you—"
Jesse flipped round, "—Don't tell me what Joel was to me. I looked up to him, but I won't go against the council verdict."
The pair of you stared each other down. A blip of regret shone in your eyes for overstepping the personal subject with Jesse. It mattered to you just as much as it mattered to him, even when your closeness with Joel Miller extended as much as brief conversations and checkovers to make sure you were OK after Patrol.
There was a sense of disdain in the air after the town had gathered to debate on sending a handful of subjects to Seattle to claim back Joel Miller's dignity from the hands that defiled that with an obscene torture. Ellie had spoken concisely, her thoughts scattered on wrinkled paper to ensure her love for Joel was clear enough without being clouded with anger.
Once the outcome of the Council vote was a strong no, two yes votes against it, Jesse's eyes went to you when you shook your head with disappointment.
Joel Miller was part of the community they had so desperately built to be safe in.
People from the outside were changing that.
Now, you were following Jesse like a lost dog, an attempt at convincing him to throw caution to the wind and pack up for Seattle anyway. Ellie was doing it, with or without Jackson's permission, that of it you were sure.
"Can you at least just think about it?" You pushed the boat out to him one more time and it returned with a roll of the eyes and a huff. "OK. I won't bring it up again. Beating a dead horse."
Jesse pulled his lips into a thin line, bending to press a kiss to your lips that spoke as a silent apology. An olive branch to say he wasn't mad, but this was the only way. He cared for Joel Miller, but, if the Jackson Commune saw fit to stay put and not create a war between those who tortured him to death; then he had his hands tied.
Accepting the kiss, a little deflated which Jesse picked up on, you smiled meekly. Don't worry, I still love you, the smile said to wash his insecurities away.
"I'm going to the Mess Hall for lunch. Are you coming?" Jesse placed his hand against your neck, thumb under your jawline. You nodded, a soft smile on his face as he wrapped an arm around your shoulders, "C'mon."
You were in line next to Jesse, trays slid across the countertop as you craned your neck to see food offered up as the afternoon menu. The produce was dire, a collective of sodden vegetables and dried out chicken. Though, you shouldn't complain, you were safe and relatively happy. The mildly grim lunch serving would be forgiven.
The Mess Hall was busy after the Council Meeting, a lot of residents sat talking of the very topic over their meals. Your eyes scanned the room whilst you waited for Jesse to spoon some food onto your plate. Ellie was at the opposite side, crestfallen and shoulders hunched as she stabbed the broccoli on her plate.
Whatever relationship Ellie and Joel had toward the end of his life was haunting that kid. You could see it, the way the corners of her mouth were downward, eyes glazed over when she tried to maintain a tough composure. It made you feel sorry for her; not that you would verbalise that.
"Hey—" You looked to Jesse as he grabbed a glass of freshly squeezed orange juice for your tray. "Go find a seat. I'm going to speak to Ellie." You thumbed in her direction.
Jesse followed your gesture, his face contorting into concern, "Don't bring up Seattle."
"I won't." You lied, "I'm just going to talk."
"OK." You felt bad that Jesse believed such a little white lie that could grow arms and legs if poked enough. Both trays in his hand, he turned on his heel and sought out a bench for you both to sit at whilst you headed toward Ellie.
She lifted her head instinctively to the presence of another body close. Ellie wasn't entirely a welcoming character, but you had been acquainted enough that she trusted you, and liked you enough to let you sit and chat with her when you felt like it. You slid into the bench across from her, hands tucked beneath your backside as you both stared at her half-eaten food on the ceramic plate.
"I won't be kissing the chef for this lunch." Your joke landed flat but Ellie was polite enough to smile weakly. There was no time like the present, you supposed, "I have a feeling you're going to head to Seattle, with or without Jackson backing you."
Ellie scowled, "Jesse sent you to talk me down?"
"No. Actually—He doesn't think you'll do it alone. He has a lot of faith in the voting system and following orders." You shrugged, "Just me. I get it, you want to seek revenge for Joel and I'm sorry that the Council didn't believe in that."
"Yeah—Well, they're just scared."
You contemplated agreement, "Maybe. . . But, I do think you should go." This had Ellie stare at you, "Not on a whim. A thorough plan would help your cause, but that may take time—it's already been three months. I have enough medical aid for three days, a couple of food packs I kept after Patrol."
"Are you going to come with me?" Ellie straightened her posture. She liked what she was hearing from you.
Eyes glanced over your shoulder to see Jesse grimacing at the food pocketed in his cheek, he was people watching whilst he waited for you. Your heart clenched, an iron vice encasing it because you knew that your decision would be an ultimate betrayal for Jesse.
Your decision felt like a breakup.
"I may be a couple of hours behind." You informed, saturated in guilt. "Just leave breadcrumbs in Seattle, if you can."
Standing from the bench, Ellie and you shared a single nod of consensus to the plan, your leg lifting to step over the bench and make headway to Jesse. You falsely beamed at your boyfriend, palms clammy as you wiped them on your jeans — seeking refuge beneath his arm as he pulled you in.
Single kiss pressed to your temple, you stared over to Ellie who was staring right back at you. There was a sudden level of respect radiating from her, knowing the sacrifice you were willing to make to assist in avenging Joel Miller. Everybody was aware that Jesse softened around you, his sternness for routine slipped with time when it came to you.
You were about to leave a devastation in your wake. A relationship built on trust and deep affection withered away once Jesse notices your absence in the Jackson Commune.
—
"What were you speaking to Ellie about?" Jesse's question came quick, as if he had been biting it back when you ate lunch. You had returned to the stables with him to wash the riding equestrian equipment.
You hid your panic, "Oh—About the Council Meeting to be honest with you." You weren't lying, but you would alter the truth. "I just wanted to make sure she was OK after the verdict."
"She's pissed, I know that." Jesse kissed his teeth, "I was a little worried that she'd storm out and just head for Seattle herself."
"Could you blame her if she did?" If you could've bit your tongue off you would've. Albeit, too late, you still stared at Jesse, hoping he'd agree with your stance. "I mean, Joel meant a great deal to her—"
Jesse interjected impatiently, "—We've already spoke about this."
"Yeah, Jesse, I know. But—"
"—But nothing." Jesse snapped, "Do you not trust the Council's guidance on this? It's a bad idea to head to Seattle just so we can score a tally against the people who killed Joel. We can leave it at that."
You were getting irritated.
"Jesse," You spoke firmly, "I'm allowed to have an opinion, just as much as you're allowed one."
"Your opinion is encouraging the destruction that would follow if Ellie left for Seattle." Jesse was picking a route for this argument and sticking to it. "You listened to Maria after you fucked up your spot on Patrol, why can't you listen to me about this?"
Silence was met between the ambient horse sounds. You stared at Jesse, a little stung by his choice of words and a little too stubborn to take it with a pinch of salt considering the heightened tensions. He didn't seem to falter in his facade, eyes not leaving yours as he continued to wipe down a saddle, your own sponge slamming into the pail of lukewarm water before storming out of the stables.
—
Later that night, a mere hours later, you had mulled over the bad taste that Jesse had left in your mouth. He had given a hard truth, but your pride was astounding in its presence that you refused to even attempt the walk of shame back to the stables to apologise for your half of the argument.
Plus, you had turn your full attention to devise a plan on getting to Seattle and reuniting with Ellie on her quest for retribution.
Headstrong on completing a logical route where the survival rate was high, you had mapped out your steps, equated out the rations to days spent away from Jackson, and limited you baggage to a rucksack and the clothes on your back. Similar to how the Jackson Patrolmen found you en route to their safe haven.
You had set aside your stash of food packs for Ellie, divided between you both but you'd snoop around the Mess Hall at dinner, for any leftovers you could salvage for the journey. Ellie had advised she would be leaving through the night for minimal disruption to her plan, and an invitation was handed your way which you politely declined.
You wanted to say goodbye to Jesse.
As you stuffed the remainder of the food packs for Ellie into your bag, your front door opened to reveal Jesse clad in a black button shirt and jeans, and a face of that screamed timid grovelling.
He loved you so deeply that he was known to swallow his own pride, reflect on his words, and be the first to step over the line to apologise whenever you argued. Regardless of his opinion, he knew you were too obstinate to be the first to break the tension. He balanced you out, just as you did with him.
Bag zipped nonchalantly to hide any urgency to hide the food packs, you folded your arms, bag kicked by your heel under the bench as you stared at him in your doorway.
Jesse smiled, "Put your bottom lip away."
You raised your brows.
"It was a joke. Are we not in joke territory right now?" Jesse raised his hands a little to imitate a minor surrender as he stepped toward you, "I can be serious. Let me see—" He peeled your arms away from your chest, taking your softer hands in his and pulled them around his waist before peppering your face with kisses, "—I'm sorry for being a jackass."
"You weren't being a jackass." You mumbled as he squashed your cheeks together, pressing a kiss to your pouted lips, "You were right about me fucking up Patrol."
Jesse nodded, "Yes, I was." He kissed softly you again, "But, I didn't need to bring it up."
It made you feel sad. The pit in your stomach flourishing as he tenderly tended to you, each kiss a reminder that you would be the one to break his heart, and if you made it back to Jackson alive, you would have to live everyday with that regret as you knew your relationship would be dead the moment you left the walls that brought such security.
That's if they ever let you back in.
Selfishly, you chose to indulge in the moment with Jesse. There had been an idea, a small faint scheme that preyed on the argument in the stables, adding fuel to the fire to make it billow above the tree lines. It would've made it an easier hurdle to get over when you turned your back on Jackson, but his attentiveness had seized you from head to toe.
Leant into his touch, you let Jesse kiss down your neck to his favourite spot, your collarbone, where he nipped at it. You scoffed in turn and shoved him gently, not able to keep your own smile of forgiveness at bay.
You hoped he would do the same.
"Is everything OK?" Jesse could work out your head better than you. You hated it sometimes.
As he reached to smooth the furrow of your brows, you replied, "Yeah. I'm just tired."
"Let's go to bed then." Jesse walked past you confidently and headed toward your bedroom, halting when he didn't feel your presence behind him. You wiped at the quick tears that had fallen before he turned, replacing them with a false smile which Jesse noticed but didn't comment. He'd ask in the morning. Holding out the palm of his hand to you, he spoke, "You coming, or do I have to drag you?"
"I think you might have to drag me." You joked, the lump in your throat sizeable but you managed to swallow it.
Two strides, Jesse had made it back to you and threw you over his shoulder with ease, his hand coming to your backside for a teasing smack as you laughed genuinely.
