Regarding 3 of my ask, what have you re-thought about incidents like Varanavrata, if you don't mind me asking? Sorry, I am just too invested in your WIP.
Hi bro!
Sorry, this is the second time I am writing this answer, Tumblr malfunction deleted the first draft of it without posting it.
First off, thank you so much for taking such interest in Antraatman! Please don’t apologize, do ask more questions like these!
Coming to your question, it is a matter of perspective. The events in the epic are narrated in a very impersonal manner, in such a way that there is some detachment between the reader and the characters.
However, while writing Antraatman, I write as Arjun, I put myself in his place, I try to feel what he must have felt. For example, when Ekalavya came and everyone lauded him, how would Arjun have felt? Baffled, confused, hurt? I let myself feel those emotions and let the words flow. When Karna gatecrashed Rangabhoomi, what would Arjun, the boy coming into the flush of ‘manhood’ think? Wouldn’t he be angry? His pride hurt? How would he react? What would he think? These questions lie behind each line of Antraatman.
Coming to Varnavrat, before I started writing this book, it was an incident that felt like a moral horizon, that is all. Today, it still feels like a moral horizon to an extent, but I feel like I understood what the Pandavas felt. Because when writing, I did not look at the scene with the impartial eyes of an observer, I looked at that scene, as well as its prelude, with Arjun’s eyes. The eyes of a boy whose family was in danger of death. In those long days, what would that boy see? What would he feel? What would he think? Wouldn’t he feel like he is being boxed in, hunted? What would he do to cope? By the time Kunti commands Bheem to set fire to the palace, what would Arjun be thinking? Wouldn’t he be conflicted? Why did he do what he did? He had a reason, a rationalization for the reason. His survival, and his family’s survival.
I do not make excuses for what Arjun did, but I can understand why he did that. Before Antraatman, I could not understand the same. That is what I meant.
Similarly, as a reader of the epic, Bheem/Hidimbi was hardly more than a footnote for me.
While writing Antraatman, however, a legion of questions arise. What kind of a dynamic was Bheem/Hidimbi, something that started with Hidimbi falling in love but Bheem threatening to kill her? What are the cultural differences between the Kurus and Hidimbi’s people, called the ‘Rakshasas? What prejudices did Arjun and his family carry intrinsically with them, who thought those people below human? How would these prejudices affect the dynamics? How would Arjun react, with horror, or acceptance, or will he travel a spectrum of reactions? How would Bheem react? How do I characterize Arjun and Bheem here? When Bheem is with Hidimbi, what do the others do, while ‘roaming the jungles’, as said in canon? What will they require in everyday life, how will they acquire these things?
I’m still wrestling with these questions as I write the story.
Writing Antraatman makes me read deeper into the epic, with the eyes of a writer extracting information, not a casual reader. That causes many perspective changes, brings in a new element of understanding, as does writing a first-person PoV novel, as it brings a element of closeness.
Okay, this is a very long, rambling answer, but I got so excited at your question!














