J.Lo and Shakira’s halftime show was good
I have watched it and rewatched it and taken my time to mull it over. The verdict is: I thought it was good. I didn’t think it was “OH MY GOD, cancel my plans I must learn this choreography immediately”-good and I’ve been there before.
In fact, four years ago when Beyonce performed at the half-time show with Bruno Mars (and Coldplay), I did need to shut my life down and recuperate. I was shook. Beyonce, you see, invoked another era and still thrived in the present. She, like the very best artists, hearkened back feelings, moments, nostalgia of yore and challenged it with the full toolbox of the culture at present. She was a Black Panther and an alien and everything in between. I am not even a die-hard Beyonce stan like that but as far as Super Bowl half-time performances go, we’re all still waiting for anyone to top her.
I know, I know, Prince sang in the rain and his two dancers somehow managed to avoid devastating catastrophes on stage. Guitar solos, sex appeal and, again, all that rain. I don’t know how it happened either. Prince was a beautiful pixie-sex-god. Simple as that. Don’t overthink his contributions to the culture. His sex appeal exists in a different realm than the physical. We do not yet have the words to describe the colors he painted with. So, no, I will not compare Beyonce’s performance to his. Beyonce is many things, but she’s firmly, confidently a woman. Meaning she’s of this world, not fairy land, so we can not explain away her drive or success as coincidental. She is the hardest working woman in show business (though J.Lo appears to be right behind her). But she is a woman nonetheless. All of her hard work is pounded out step by step, day by day, meal by meal, soundcheck by soundcheck. She’s a craftswoman and, in addition to her talent, I believe that’s why she’s the queen. No one can outwork her and I love a work ethic. I believe we all do.
And that brings us back to the matter at hand, the halftime show was good. They clearly worked hard on a dazzling show. No if’s and’s or but’s about it. Anyone denying that is either racist or sexist and I won’t engage with a third option.
Let’s now take a moment to address the blow-back from the right wing (who, I fear, is being stupid on purpose at this point), J.Lo and Shakira have beautiful bodies that they’ve clearly spent decades toning and gyrating and choreographing with. I will not tolerate any bad-mouthing about their overt sexiness and lack of taste. I hate America’s prudishness when it comes to our female artists. Especially when we’ve promoted Britney Spears since she was 17 talking about ‘Hit me baby, one more time’. It always feels like we take greater offense when the women being discussed are non-white (yes, I am citing the Janet Jackson nipple-gate scenario). We (the larger “we”, not me personally) applaud the Victoria’s Secret fashion show but now we want to condemn these beautiful women, over 40, for loving their bodies and showing them off on the biggest stage of their careers? Make it make sense. Is it because they’re Latina? Or have thicker thighs than those models? Or is it because they seem totally self-possessed and in charge of how they present themselves? Do we hate women being in charge that much? How is one sexiness acceptable and the other isn’t?
The Victoria’s Secret fashion show appears on CBS. That’s as basic cable as it can get. I wonder if it boils down to the Super Bowl being a “family-friendly” show and the VS fashion show is explicitly sexier. Perhaps these critics were just caught off-guard and they hate surprises! (But just take one look at the asses on some of these players in those see-through pants and tell me that the whole premise of the NFL is not the lovechild of a horny Grindr executive! I dare you.)
Plus, to the point about J.Lo and Shakira being half-naked, they better be! They are athletes and athletes get hot! (We don’t expect tennis players to cover up.) Of course they wanted to show off what they’ve worked their entire lives for. Nobody gets in that kind of shape on accident. Plus, it felt right to showcase their athleticism on America’s greatest stage surrounded by other athletes for the world to see. To dance that hard and work all that hair and appear to be having the time of your life is grueling! They pulled it off swimmingly. Dare I say, joyfully??
Now, where the show falters for me is this, it did not shock or stun or educate me. And I know the last one sounds funny but let me explain. I do not need live performances to give me an education in a classic sense. But I do like art, and that includes cheesy half-time shows, to reveal something of the artist. So in that sense, I do look for some emotional or spiritual education to take place. Show me something I don’t know, if you will. Give me some reveal, some baring of the soul. And, I don’t think anyone can say we got that.
Yes, J.Lo referenced ‘Hustlers’ with a gorgeous pole-dancing number which I adored as a political statement to the Oscars (a real, ‘How you like me now?’). And, Shakira played guitar and the drums and did some very cool Afro-Latino dance moves that broke from her tradition of wacky inflatable tube man gyrations. We could say her performance felt very global and that felt cool. And yes, most overtly, little kids sang in cages. They might’ve been Cinderella-inspired beautiful, shimmering, easily-escapable cages...but, didn’t we want more?
It’s not J.Lo or Shakira’s job to stick it to the man at the most watched television event of the year. But I did leave the performance really craving a more biting indictment of our country’s hypocrisy. Remember, this is the year after every artist under the sun (except Adam Levine) refused to perform the half-time show as a show of solidarity with Colin Kaepernick. In spite of the NFL’s hardest-hitting attempts at addressing police brutality with some pointed commercials, no NFL executive or spokesperson made a statement in regards to it. They left all the explanation to the families of the victims of the violence. And needless to say, those people were black. Because, as always, we expect black people to solve racism.
So, I think you’ll excuse me for expecting a heavier hitting political statement. Is it unrealistic? Yes. But so was Beyonce pulling off a Black Panther inspired performance in the face of the NFL and entire country. I wanted to love, love, love the half-time show and I certainly enjoyed it. I mean, how could I not?! They’re both so gorgeous! And fun. And cool. God, I’d love just one day with either of their hair stylists but amazing hair simply can not make a political statement on its own. And I wanted juuuuust a little bit more.