Genre - 18+ established relationship au, fluff, smut MDNI
Wc - 3.8k
Warnings - pussy gf whipped jungkook 😋, lots of kissing n marking, dom jk, drunk jkayy, Explicit smut - unprotected sex, oral (m receiving), gagging, jungkook films oc while she gives him a head, big d jk, dirty talking, praises, hair pulling, fingering, riding, overstimulation, man handling, nipple play, sucking, it's just filth romance sorry😭, flufff at the end, cuddling, a lil marriage talk
a/n - we're still simping over this iconic live, right😭🙇♀️
Your thumb presses to the scanner and the door to your boyfriend’s house unlocks. Jungkook had your fingerprint added in his new house too. It’s a bigger thing for you than he probably even realizes. It's so deeply intimate, which is always reminded to you every time you come here.
It’s past midnight. Way past actually. You weren't actually in a deep sleep, that is why when you woke with Jungkook’s notification asking if you were awake (which usually translates to him asking you to come over), you were already up throwing on a hoodie and leggings.
There have been too many nights like this to count. Usually him or his brother dropping you off at his house during late nights when schedules didn’t line up, or he’d just want to hold you or he’d be tipsy and overly affectionate. You never complain.
If anything, you secretly love that he reaches out to you whenever he needs you.
You got to know on the way by his brother that he's been doing a live. Which you could only watch some of it in the car before he ended it. But, you did hear about a lot from his brother which made you curious. He’d been free. A little reckless. Completely himself.
And you’d felt..proud.
It takes a certain kind of courage to let the world see you without polish.
You slip your shoes off and walk down the hallway, where you find your boyfriend leaning against the kitchen counter, hair falling into his eyes with a lazy grin as he talks into his phone.
Phone.
Did he start another live?
You’re almost certain you watched him end it.
He tilts his head back and laughs again, completely unaware of you standing there.
You move closer, as silent as you can.
“Babyyy.”
Fuck.
Your eyes snap to the phone in his hand.
Are millions of people losing their minds in the middle of the night as to whom jeon jungkook is calling baby?
You're so fucking not mentally prepared to get your relationship public, especially like this.
You dart sideways trying to duck behind the wall, anything. Your foot catches nothing and you stumble, hand slapping over your mouth to muffle the squeak.
“What are you doing?” he asks, confused at your reaction.
You mouth at him urgently, "Is it live?"
He exhales a laugh after realising. “Baby, relax,” he says, shaking his head, turning the phone for you to see the screen. “It’s Taehyung.” The relief that leaves your body is almost embarrassing.
It's funny how quickly he ends the call and his hands are on you so fast
- except nothing’s funny when he’s looking at you like that.
One arm hooks around your waist and yanks you in until you slam against his chest. The other hand grabs your jaw, fingers digging into your cheeks as you feel the cold diamond rings against it.
He kisses you with all lips and tongue pushing in like he’s pissed he waited this long. He tastes like strong whiskey and something sweet. His lips feel hot, as he tries to taste every inch of the inside of your mouth in the messy makeout.
You gasp, trying to breath in just a second, hands flying up to his chest. You feel the way his abs flex when you grab fistfuls of his shirt. The hand on your jaw slides back, fingers tangling rough in your hair, tugging your head back so he can angle deeper. His tongue fucks against yours, slow and filthy now, matching the way his hips roll forward. You feel him hard, pressing right against your lower belly through the jeans.
His hand leaves your hair, sliding down over your hip as he grabs a handful of your ass and squeezes, pulling you up onto your toes so your core grinds right against his thigh. You can’t help the broken moan that slips out.
“Did you watch my live?”
Your knees wobble as he breaks the kiss to drag his open mouth down your jaw, teeth grazing with a bite, making you whimper.
“A little,” you murmur. “On the way here.”
“Oppa told me there's a high chance your company's gonna lose their mind after watching this live.”
He tch’s, tugging your bottom lip before letting go.
“Don’t care,” he mutters, hands sliding up under your hoodie, palms warm on your bare back. You're definitely more turned on by how unbothered he sounds. “Good,” you whisper back.
He doesn’t let the kiss break as he hooks one arm under your ass, the other around your back and scoops you up. Your legs wrap around his waist on instinct, ankles locking at the small of his back.
He walks you to his couch, groaning low into your mouth when you roll your hips without meaning to, chasing the friction where he’s already so fucking hard against you.
He drops down, hands everywhere at once-greedy and impatient. Rough palm dragging over and squeezing your breast. The other stays locked on your ass, guiding your hips to grind against his lap.
You’re both a mess already- sweaty, mouths never fully separating. His arm stretches behind you, fumbling blindly and when he brings it back, there’s a sticky-sweet lollipop pressing your bottom lip.
“Open.”
Your lips part as you wrap your mouth around it sucking around it slowly. Your eyes stay locked on his the whole time and his pupils darken instantly.
The hand on your breast tightens, thumb brushing rough over your nipple through your hoodie. You pull off with a wet pop while he snatches it back, shoving it straight into his own mouth.
You push both hands flat against his chest and slide off his lap as your knees hit the floor between his spread thighs. He widens his legs more, making room for you.
The obvious bulge strains against the zipper. You lean in pressing your palm flat over the length of him through the jeans which makes him hiss.
Your lips brushes the strip of bare skin right above his waistband where his shirt’s ridden up, tongue flicking out to taste his skin. Your hand stays pressed on his cock, thumb dragging slow along the underside, teasing the ridge you can feel even through the fabric.
He groans, fingers threading rough into your hair as he curses under his breath, the lollipop clicking against his teeth when he bites down on it as you press harder.
“Keep teasing like that and I’m gonna come in these fucking pants before you even touch me properly.” His fingers tighten in your hair, tugging to make you look up at him.
You drag your tongue in a lazy line down toward the waistband. “Want me to stop?” you ask innocently, even as your fingers start working the button of his jeans.
He laughs almost angry. “Don’t you fucking dare.”
He helps you remove it and brings them down until it’s bunched around his ankles. His cock springs free -thick, slapping up against the flat plane of his stomach with a wet smack, veins bulging along the shaft as the tip already leaks shiny bead of precum. Your thighs press together on instinct, trying to ease the sudden ache, but it only makes it worse.
He lets out a smug chuckle reaching down to wrap a hand around the base of his cock, giving it one lazy stroke.
You don’t make him wait as you lean in. One hand wraps around the base where his own just was.
He’s so thick your mouth waters instantly.
You place open-mouthed kiss right to the underside, tongue flicking out to trace the thick vein that runs from base to tip. “Don’t tease,” he warns, hand coming to the back of your head.
You open your mouth wider and take him in, swirling your tongue around the slit to lap up every drop leaking out. He groans, head falling back against the couch.
You sink down further, lips stretching around him, cheeks hollowing as you take more. Halfway down and he’s already hitting the back of your throat.
“Goddamn, baby,” he rasps, fingers tightening in your hair. “So fucking good. Take it all- yeah, fuck, just like that.”
You pull back with string of spit connects your lips to the head for a second before you dive back down, bobbing your head faster. Hand stroking what your mouth can’t reach. He thrusts up into your mouth, fucking your face just enough to make your eyes water. “Look at me,” he growls.
You glance up through wet lashes. His thumb brushes over your cheekbone. “My good girl. Taking my cock so pretty.”
His fingers twist tighter in your hair, gathering it all in one rough fist at the back of your head. He slowly guides your mouth down further down a little. You gag a little.
Spit pools at the corners of your lips, dripping messy down your chin.
“Should I do another live, hmm?” his hips rocking a bit deeper.
“Let the whole fucking world see how my beautiful girl is on her knees for me,” he rasps, tugging your hair again to make you look up at him through blurry lashes. “How pretty you look choking on my cock. Letting everyone know I’m taken. You’re mine. I’m yours. Fuck—”
You can’t answer- mouth too full. Your core clenches so hard you almost whimper around him. You have no fucking idea what would actually happen if he actually did it. but right now the fantasy alone is enough to make you dizzy.
You pull off him with a gasp- needing air. Strings of spit connect your swollen lips to his glistening tip. You’re panting, chest heaving when you look up.
He’s got a phone in his free hand- camera pointed down at you. Oh my god-
“Jungko—”
You start to scramble back with wide eyes but his grip in your hair keeps you right there.
He chuckles at your cute freakout.
“Relax, baby,” he says, thumb brushing over your cheek to wipe away a tear you didn’t even realize fell. “It’s for my eyes only.”
He guides you back down and you moan around his length involuntarily, the vibration making his hips jerk.
“Eyes on me, baby.”
You look up- straight into the lens, straight into him, mouth working harder. Jungkook's head tips back for a second before he looks down again.
“That’s it,” he praises, thumb stroking your cheek. “My good fucking girl." His thumb brushes your cheek, almost tender, even as his hips rock shallow into your mouth.
“So fucking pretty,” he murmurs with a wrecked voice. every word makes you clench around nothing.
“Gonna come—fuck, baby. Gonna fill that pretty mouth. Be my good girl and take it all?”
You hum around him. The phone lands somewhere on the couch while he places the lollipop back in the whiskey glass. Both hands in your hair now as his fists tighten around them.
“Fuck—fuck, baby—take it—”
He groans your name like a curse as he spills into your mouth and you swallow instinctively. You stay on your knees panting with lips swollen and shiny, chin messy with spit and him.
His thumb traces your bottom lip. “Come here.”
He hauls you up, wrapping around you, pulling you into his lap so you’re straddling him again. His mouth crashes into yours immediately- kissing you deep, tasting himself on your tongue.
“Gonna fuck you so good,” he mutters against your lips, hands already sliding under your hoodie, shoving it up. His fingers hook into the waistband of your pants tugging impatiently. You stand up letting them down.
Before you get back to straddle him, he's flipping you around fast. Your back slams against his chest, ass settling right over his cock. His mouth latching onto the side of your throat, biting down hard enough to make you gasp.
His hand slides between your thighs. Fingers drag slow over the drenched swollen slit. You let out a broken whimper- hips twitching forward into his touch.
“So fucking sensitive,” he murmurs against your neck.
You grind back pressing your ass against his cock, feeling him harden under you again. “No,” he growls, free hand clamping down on your hip to still you. “Need to prep you first, baby. Gonna hurt my girl if I don’t open you up nice.”
Whether drunk or sober, Jungkook has rarely fucked without prepping you, saying you'd get hurt otherwise, which you indeed can't deny because even after all these years you still haven't been accustomed to his size.
Two fingers slide through your folds, gathering all the wetness before pushing both at once.
You let a sharp moan. Your walls clench hard around the intrusion. “So wet, baby.”
He pumps his fingers fast, pressing right against that spot that makes your vision blur. “Jungkoo—” you gasp, head thrown back harder against his shoulder. He gladly sucks a fresh mark into your skin while his fingers fuck into you faster. His thumb finds your clit and your whole body jerks.
Your moans turn into his name- broken and desperate—as the orgasm crashes through you. Your thighs shake violently, hips jerking in uncontrollable little spasms against his palm.
His fingers keep moving gently as he places soft kisses on your shoulder, the side of your neck, then up to your jaw. “Shh, baby,” he murmurs between them, soothing even though he’s still knuckle-deep in you. “I’ve got you."
You’re twitching from the overstimulation, every nerve on fire. Your hand flies down to grab his wrist, fingers wrapping tight around it in a weak attempt to stop him.
You turn in his lap as his fingers slip out- arms looping around his neck for support.
His mouth never leaves you, soothing kisses trail everywhere- your collarbone, the hollow of your throat. One hand slides under the hem of your hoodie tugging it over your head. Your breasts spill free, nipples already hard and aching from everything.
Jungkook dips his head, mouth covering one instantly. Tongue flicks over the peak, then swirls slow circles that make your back arch. You moan needy- fingers flying up to fist in his hair, tugging hard enough to make him groan against your skin, hips rolling forward instinctively, grinding your still-sensitive core against his cock. He’s fully hard again now, thick and leaking against your thigh.
He switches to the other nipple—while one hand cups the first breast, thumb rolling over the swollen peak.
You moan while your fingers fumble at the buttons of his black shirt. Jungkook shrugs it off. Your hands immediately drags down his chest slow- tracing every ridge, every line of muscle, every coloured tattoos on his arm.
“Wanna ride you,” you breathe out the words for him.
“Yeah?” he leans back a little against the couch. His hands find your hips. “Go on, baby. Take what you want.”
Your fingers wrap around his base as you guide him right to your entrance. The head nudges your folds, before you start to sink down.
You both moan at the same time- broken sounds tangling together. it burns in the best way, filling you up inch by inch until your ass meets his thighs. Your head falls forward onto his shoulder, nails digging into his shoulders.
He rubs a soothing hand up your back down to your spine.
You take your sweet time adjusting to the feeling of him and find a rhythm. Jungkook’s head tips back against the couch. His hands always guiding you.
“Fuck—yeah, just like that,” he praises, voice rough. “Look at you riding me so pretty. My good girl."
You speed up even as your thighs feel burning, breasts bouncing with every movement; Jungkook leans forward to catch one in his mouth again, sucking hard while his hand slides around to grip your ass, spreading you open a little so he can thrust up to meet you.
“Goddamn, baby,” he growls against your nipple. “So tight.”
Your nails rake down his back, definitely leaving red lines over. He hisses, bucking up harder.
The couch creaks under you both, wet sounds mixing with your shared moans.
“Fuck—look at you, my love, my sweetheart.”
One thing you've come to known and loved all these years is that Jungkook is very vocal during sex. And loves to hear you as much. You clench around him at his praises. His mouth drags up your neck claiming you in all ways.
“All mine,” he mutters, hot breath fanning over your skin. “All fucking mine.”
“Speak to me, baby,” he growls biting down on your throat, as he marks you. His tongue soothes the sting right after.
Your head falls back, body trembling as you grind down harder. “Kook—” you gasp, voice cracking. “-yours. All yours. Only yours.”
“Good." His thumb finds your clit.
“Fuck—Jungkook—I'm-” you whimper, nails raking down his back.
He bites your earlobe as he whispers hot against it. “Come for me. Come all over me. Let me hear how much you love being mine.”
He thrusts sharper up into you, meeting every bounce, filling you over and over while his thumb doesn’t let up on your clit.
You moan his name like a prayer as the orgasm rips through you. He follows right after, chasing his own high as he fills you up.
You collapse forward, tears pricking your eyes as your forehead drops to his shoulder, body twitching with aftershocks.
Jungkook holds you tight against him, lips finding your temple, your cheek, your lips. One hand slides up your back, stroking you, while the other cups the back of your head, fingers threading gently through your hair.
“Shh.” he whispers against your temple. “I’m here, baby.”
His hand keeps rubbing your back, warm palm sliding up and down.
“You okay?” he asks quietly. “Too much?”
You manage a small, shaky nod against his shoulder, nuzzling closer as your arms loop around his neck weakly.
He smiles against your hair. “Love you so fucking much. You know that, right?"
He keeps whispering sweet nothings while his hands never stop moving. Your head is tucked under his chin, cheek pressed to the warm skin of his chest. His cock is still inside you- soft now, but he hasn’t made any move to pull out, and neither have you.
“Baby,” he murmurs after a moment.
You hum lazily, nosing into the crook of his neck. “Mmm?”
"Don’t you think it’s time... we should.. you know. After the tour maybe. Make us public.”
You almost still at his words, lifting your head to look at him, to figure if he's drunk talking. but when his eyes meet yours, all you find is an honest confession.
He cups your face with one hand, thumb stroking your cheek so gently. “I don’t want us to be a secret anymore, y/n,” he says. “I want to love you in front of the whole world. Want to hold your hand when we walk somewhere. Want to kiss you whenever I feel like it. Want everyone to know you’re mine and I’m yours.”
You almost whisper out his name, “kook..”, barely there.
He mistakes the hesitation for doubt. His face falls a fraction.
“It’s okay if you don’t want it. I just… I don’t know. I… forget it, never mind—”
You stop him with a kiss- cutting off his ramble.
When you pull back, you keep your forehead pressed to his. “Jungkook,” you say softly. “I..I want it too.”
His eyes search yours. “But.." You swallow, trying to find the words. “I’m scared. It’s a big step.”
“I know, baby. I know,” his hand soothes down your waist. “But you’ve got me. I’m always here. We’ll do it together. Whatever happens, we face it together.”
His nose brushes yours. “I don’t want fans to find out about us directly on our wedding day.”
You swear your heart has never flipped so bad. Heat floods your cheeks so fast you feel dizzy.
Of course, you've talked about the future before. Half-asleep cute whispers about houses, kids, growing old together. Beautiful, dreamy talks.
But bringing up “the wedding” talk in a serious conversation hasn't happened before. and It’s doing things to you. Your eyes sting, feeling overwhelmed from so many ways.
His lips find your cheek as he speaks against it. “What, you don’t want to marry me?”
You swat his chest lightly at his obvious teasing and immediately bury your face in the crook of his neck again, hiding the heat in your cheeks. He chuckles as his arms tighten around you.
One day soon- he thinks.
He’s gonna do it.
Tell the world he’s in love. that he's drowned in love. In you.
Tell them you’re his.
He’ll get to hold you in public. Post a photo of your intertwined fingers.
and kiss you whenever he wants to.
He’ll get to love you out loud.
Soon.
Jungkook presses a lingering kiss to the crown of your head.
⤷one-shot!! in which.... jungkook shows up every Friday for six months to ask your father for permission to marry you, and gets rejected every time. Still, he returns each week with flowers, pastries, and stubborn determination. Meanwhile, you have no idea your boyfriend has been secretly trying to “apply” for the role of your husband behind your back.
I'm gonna marry her anyway (Magic!-Rude)
pairing: 전정국 x fem!reader
Genre: romance | slice of life | comedy | fluff | bittersweet
warnings: jk is down baddd, he's SOO in love, jk's a bit delusional tho, peak romance trope btw, he loves to pamper y/n, he would do everything all again without question, crying, happy tears, respectfully he wont give up, Jungkook is the sweetest
word count: 7.2k
Every Friday at Four
If someone asked you to describe your boyfriend, you would probably say something annoyingly sweet.
Kind. Talented. Loyal.
The sort of person who remembers the name of the stray cat that lives behind your apartment building, not only he remembers it but buys extra cat food and leaves it out in little dishes. The sort of person who buys two of everything because he knows you'll steal half of his anyway, and he'd rather plan for the theft than risk you going without. The sort of person who texts "Did you eat?" at 2 PM and then again at 6 PM and then again at 9 PM, and actually waits for an answer each time, and sends follow-up questions if you take too long, "What did you eat?" and "Was it good?"
What you would not say is: "My boyfriend spends his Friday afternoons getting rejected by my father."
Mostly because you don't know what's happening, and sweet Jungkook intends to keep it that way.
The first time he drives to your parents' house, he almost turns the car around.
Three times… scratch that…actually, four.
The fourth time is especially embarrassing because he has already parked. The engine is off. The keys are in his hand. He's committed, and yet his hand keeps drifting toward the ignition like it has its own agenda, like it wants to go home.
He sits behind the steering wheel, staring at your childhood home. The house itself isn't scary. It's just a house with white walls that need repainting. A small garden where your mother has beautiful flowers. A blue mailbox that has your last name on it with faded stickers that are peeling at the edges. Normal things.
Unfortunately, your father lives inside, and your father is terrifying. Not in a dramatic movie way, he doesn't threaten people or is part of the mafia, and he definitely doesn't own weapons or has a scar across his face.
It’s the fact that he looks at people the way professors look at exam papers, as if he's found three mistakes in the first paragraph and is debating whether he should continue reading or just fail you now and save him some time.
Jungkook swallows. His palms are sweating against the steering wheel. This is ridiculous… What if your father hates him? What if he laughs? What if he says no?
Then you'll ask again.
He grabs the box of pastries from the passenger seat and gets out before his courage disappears completely.
The door opens, and your father appears. For a moment, nobody says anything. The silence stretches and Jungkook becomes suddenly, painfully aware of every part of his body. He bows politely. The low and respectful kind of bow that says I come in peace, I mean no harm, please don't destroy me.
The silence grows longer, and our dear Jungkook begins wondering if people can die from awkwardness. If that's a medical condition, and if he should have written a will. Your father stares, Jungkook bows a little deeper. His back protesting.
Finally, your father speaks. "Did my daughter send you?"
"No, sir." Jungkook's voice comes out steady.
A pause. Your father's eyes narrow slightly, scanning him like he's reading a label. "Did something happen to her?"
"No, sir."
"Then why are you here?"
Jungkook suddenly forgets every sentence he prepared during the drive. All those carefully constructed arguments inside his overthinker mind, all those practiced phrases…gone, evaporated.
Wonderful
He manages a nervous smile. It feels crooked on his face, too big, too desperate. "I wanted to talk to you."
Your father doesn't move. "About?"
For a fleeting second, Jungkook considers pretending he came to discuss the weather. The weather is safe, but unfortunately for him, that would make even less sense than his actual reason, and also, he's pretty sure your father can smell lies the way other people smell smoke.
"Sir, I love your daughter."
Your father blinks a few times. "Oh."
Jungkook nods. Encouraged. Maybe this is going well. Maybe the hard part is over. Maybe…it is not going well.
"That's unfortunate," your father says, and steps aside to let him in.
⏔⏔⏔⏔ ꒰ ♡ྀི ꒱ ⏔⏔⏔⏔
Five minutes later, they're sitting at the kitchen table.
Jungkook has never seen such an intimidating kitchen before. Everything is clean and organized. He is afraid to touch anything. Your father places a cup of tea in front of him. The gesture is kind, but the expression on your father's face is not kind. Not in a malicious way, it’s the expression of someone who has watched young men come and go from this exact house, who has learned that most of them are not worth the time it takes to memorize their names. Jungkook suddenly understands where you inherited your stubbornness from.
"So," your father says.
"So," Jungkook echoes, and he immediately hates himself for echoing. He's not a parrot. He's a grown man. He has tattoos. He pays taxes, and he should be able to handle a conversation without turning into a robot.
"You love my daughter."
"Yes, sir."
"Why?"
Why? Because you're funny, because you laugh with your entire body, throwing your head back, because you cry during movies and then deny it, because you pretend not to like affection and attention and then complain when he stops giving it, which is confusing and annoying and completely endearing, because loving you happened so naturally he didn't notice it until he was already too deep in love with you.
He clears his throat. All of this is too much to say to your father. "She's amazing," Jungkook says.
Your father's face remains unreadable. "That's your argument?"
Jungkook panics. His brain, which had just started working again, shuts down completely. "No, sir."
"Good."
⏔⏔⏔⏔ ꒰ ♡ྀི ꒱ ⏔⏔⏔⏔
An hour later, Jungkook has somehow been interviewed more thoroughly than a job applicant for a position that requires government clearance.
Career plans. Finances. Future goals. Emergency savings. Apartment size. Life insurance. Retirement planning. Your father asks about his parents, his siblings, his thoughts on home ownership versus renting, his opinion on private schools versus public schools for hypothetical future children that Jungkook is definitely not ready to discuss but finds himself discussing anyway because when your father asks a question, answering feels mandatory.
At one point, your father asks what kind of husband he intends to be. Jungkook answers honestly. It's the only answer he has, the only one he's sure of. "The best one I can."
Something shifts in your father's expression, only for a second. Maybe it was approval…or pity…or maybe even indigestion. Who knows…Then comes the final question and the most important one.
The reason Jungkook is here, sweating through his nice shirt
His heartbeat speeds up. He sits straighter, tries to look like the kind of man who deserves what he's about to ask for.
"Sir."
Your father waits. He knows what's coming. Jungkook can see it in the set of his shoulders and the slight tilt of his head.
"I want to marry her."
Your father folds his hands and looks directly at him.
And says:
"No."
Like he was declining extra napkins. Like Jungkook had offered him a flyer for a kebab place he wasn't interested in. Like this whole hour meant absolutely nothing.
Jungkook stares. Surely there's more, surely there's a ‘but’ or an ‘unless’ or a ‘however’ waiting in the air, ready to step on stage and save this moment from being exactly what it sounds like.
There isn't.
Your father takes another sip of tea.
Jungkook blinks. His mouth feels dry. His ears are ringing. "Sir?"
"No."
"I understand, but—"
"No."
"Can I ask why?"
Your father nods. "You can."
Jungkook waits. Your father waits too.
Nothing happens.
"...Why?"
"Because I said no."
Jungkook nearly laughs. Not because it's funny, but because otherwise he might cry, and he's pretty sure crying in your father's kitchen would be the final nail in a coffin that's already been nailed shut, buried, and had a parking lot built over it.
⏔⏔⏔⏔ ꒰ ♡ྀི ꒱ ⏔⏔⏔⏔
The drive home feels longer. His pride aches took, his heart too…everything aches, actually, in a way that makes him wonder if this is what adulthood feels like. He should probably be upset, and angry, and embarrassed that he poured his heart out to a man who responded with a single syllable.
But Jungkook finds himself smiling, a small smile that tugs at the corners of his mouth while he waits at a red light because beneath the frustration is something unexpected.
Your father didn't laugh or mock him or send him out, and he didn’t tell Jungkook to find someone else’s daughter to love and cherish. He didn't say Jungkook wasn't good enough, wasn't successful enough, wasn't worthy. He just said 'no', and then he said it again, and then he kept saying it until Jungkook ran out of questions. He smiles because for two whole hours, he listened.
And Jungkook overthinks about it… a man doesn't spend two hours questioning someone he doesn't care about. A father doesn't interrogate a future son-in-law candidate unless the answer matters… unless the person sitting across from him is a real possibility.
‘No’ wasn't the end.
Jungkook glances at the road ahead, next Friday isn't far away. Five days, six hours, maybe less if he leaves work early. He can survive five days. He can survive anything if there's a chance at the end of it.
That evening, you're both sprawled across his couch, casually stealing fries from his plate. Your own plate sits untouched, still full, but you keep reaching for his anyway. Not because they're any different, just because they're his. This is the thing that you always do, and Jungkook loves it; it’s predictable and is exactly what he wants to come home to, exactly what he's fighting for.
Jungkook watches you. You glance up, caught, a fry halfway to your mouth.
"What?"
"Nothing."
Suspicious. Very suspicious. You narrow your eyes, and he sees your father in you for just a moment.
"What are you smiling about?"
He shakes his head. He can't tell you. Not yet. Not until he has something real to offer, something earned, something that proves he's serious. "Nothing."
You throw a fry at him. It bounces off his forehead and lands in his lap. You look proud, as if you've accomplished something significant, and your boyfriend laughs. Suddenly, the rejection doesn't feel so heavy anymore, because at the end of the day, every difficult conversation leads back to this. To you, to the future he's trying to build, one Friday at a time.
Jungkook picks up another fry. You steal that one too, quick as a cat, and he lets you. He doesn't even try to stop you. He watches you eat it, watches you chew, and for now, he lets you.
After all, he has bigger battles waiting for him next Friday. And the Friday after that. And however many it takes until your father finally says yes.
Now, 6 Months later
You are folding laundry when your phone buzzes against the coffee table, skittering like an insect that can't decide where to die. It's a text from him.
jk: Still at work, might be late for dinner, don't wait up
You smile because, of course, he is. He's always at work, or the gym, or somewhere building his body while you eat instant noodles in sweatpants that have a hole in the left thigh. (no shame)
What you don't know is that your boyfriend is not at work. Your boyfriend is currently sitting in his car in front of your parents' house. He's been here before. Many times. 6 months of Fridays, to be exact, which is 24 Fridays, which is 24 times he's climbed out of this same car with his heart hammering against his ribs.
Jungkook checks his reflection in the rearview mirror. He looks good. He looks great, actually, black sweater, hair styled in that particular way that took him 45 and 3 YouTube tutorials. He looks like a man who deserves a ‘yes.’ He looks like a man who is about to get another 'no', but hope, as they say, is a stupid and beautiful thing that dies slowly.
"Okay," he whispers to himself. "Okay. This time."
He reaches into the backseat for the flowers, peonies this week, because last week your mother mentioned she liked them and Jungkook remembered. He bought pastries again from that French place across town that requires a reservation three days in advance. Your father sees him coming up the walk through the living room window, and he doesn't move.
"Who is it, dear?" your mother calls from the kitchen.
"Nobody," your father says, which is technically true because, as far as he's concerned, Jungkook hasn't earned the right to be somebody yet.
"Nobody" rings the doorbell. Your father counts to ten before he stands. He opens the door.
"Sir," Jungkook says.
"Jungkook," your father says, like he's surprised, like he hasn't been watching the car sit in the driveway for fifteen minutes. "Again?"
"Yes, sir. If you have a moment."
"I suppose I have a moment."
This is their ritual. Your father steps aside to let him in, and Jungkook enters your childhood home. He can smell your mother's cooking from the kitchen. Something with garlic. His stomach growls, which is embarrassing, but your father pretends not to notice because even he has limits to his cruelty.
"Flowers," Jungkook says, holding them out. "For Mrs. … he clears his throat…for your wife."
"She'll appreciate them."
"And these are from Maison Blanc. The almond croissants you mentioned."
"You remembered."
"I remember everything, sir."
This is the part where your father should feel bad. This is the part where a normal person would see the earnestness in this young man's face. Your father is not having any of it. "Sit," he says. "I'll make tea once again."
They sit in the living room. The couch is old, and Jungkook sinks into it the way he always does, while your father sits in his armchair. The tea is green and bitter. Jungkook hates green tea, but he drinks it anyway.
"So," your father says.
"Sir," Jungkook begins, and he sets down his cup because his hands are shaking again and he doesn't want to spill on the carpet. "I know I've asked before. Many times. But I'm here to ask again."
"Mhm."
"I love your daughter. I have loved her for…" He pauses, does the math "…two years, four months, and sixteen days. Not that I'm counting. I mean, I am counting. I have a calendar. That sounds creepy. It's not creepy. It's —"
"Jungkook."
"Yes, sir?"
"Deep breath, son."
Jungkook takes a deep breath. Your father watches him.
"Sir, may I have your blessing to marry your daughter?" The question hangs in the air between them.
Your father takes a sip of tea. He thinks about you, his daughter, his only child, the person who once cried for three hours because her goldfish died and then forgot about it by dinner time. He thinks about the way you looked at Jungkook the first time you brought him home, like he was made of magic and promises. He thinks about the way Jungkook looks at you, like you are the only thing in the world that matters, like he would burn down every building between here and the sea if you asked him to.
He thinks, good.
Then he says: "No."
Jungkook nods. He expected this, but something in his chest still sinks, still curls up small and wounded. 25 rejections. 25 times he's asked.
"Can I ask again why, sir?"
"Because," your father says, and he leans forward, and Jungkook recognizes this posture. This is the posture of a man about to deliver a lesson. "You still flinch when I say no."
"I … what?"
"You flinch. Your shoulders go up, your eyes go down. You look like a dog that's been kicked." Your father's voice is not unkind, but it is firm. It is the voice of a man who has spent thirty years teaching high school English and knows exactly how to make a point land. "If you want to marry my daughter, you need to be able to hear 'no' without breaking. You need to be able to hear 'no' and keep standing anyway."
Jungkook stares at him. "You want me to… you're testing me??"
"I'm teaching you," your father corrects. "There's a difference."
"How long?"
"Until you stop flinching."
"And if I never stop flinching?"
Your father smiles. "Then you're not the man I thought you were, and my daughter deserves better."
They sit in silence. From the kitchen, your mother's voice rises in a question about dinner, and your father calls back that they'll be a while.
"You can go," your father says. "Unless you want to stay. Daeun made enough for three."
Jungkook should go. He knows he should go. He's supposed to meet you in two hours, and he needs to shower, and he needs to practice his smile so you won't know that he's been here again, that he's been rejected again, but the smell of garlic is making him dizzy with hunger, and your father's face has softened in a way it never has before, and something in Jungkook makes him stay.
"I'd like to stay," he says. "If that's okay."
Your father nods. "Set the table, then. You know where the plates are."
He does. He knows where everything is. He's been here enough times to have memorized the layout of your childhood home. He knows your father takes his coffee black and your mother hums when she cooks. He knows these things because he loves you, and loving you means loving where you came from, even when where you came from keeps telling him no.
⏔⏔⏔⏔ ꒰ ♡ྀི ꒱ ⏔⏔⏔⏔
You just got out of the shower when he texts again.
jk: “omw saved you some dumplings. It was a coworker's bday today.”
Y/n doesn’t question anything. You don't know about the tea, or the conversation, or the way your father's eyes went soft when Jungkook finally laughed at one of his jokes. You have no idea that somewhere in your childhood home, there's a drawer where your father keeps the cards Jungkook has brought. And you definitely have no idea that your father talks about Jungkook to his friends, calls him "that persistent kid" with something like pride in his voice. You don't know that your boyfriend is learning how to be the kind of man who doesn't flinch. You don't know that his heart that's been broken so many times and still beats hopeful.
He thinks about you. He thinks about the way you look when you first wake up, he thinks about the way you laugh, he thinks about getting down on one knee and offering you everything he has, which is not much, which is everything. Because many months ago, he made a promise to himself that he would do this right, that he would have your father's blessing.
You text him
You: hurry up, I'm hungry, and the TV show just started!! <3
Three socks and a suspicion
You are standing in front of your open sock drawer when you realize something is wrong with your boyfriend. Not wrong-wrong, not cheating-wrong or lying-wrong or has-a-secret-family-in-a-whole-different-country-wrong.
Jungkook has been... off.
Not distant, if anything, he's been more present than usual, texting more, calling for no reason, showing up at your apartment with food he claims is "leftover from the guys" but is clearly freshly bought because since when does Namjoon eat salmon with lemon dill sauce? Since when does anyone in that dorm eat vegetables that aren't covered in cheese? (again, no shame)
You hold up three socks. None of them match.
"You're thinking loudly," Jungkook says from your bed, where he's sprawled on his stomach, scrolling through his phone. He always knows when you're thinking. It's one of his most annoying qualities as a boyfriend.
"I'm not thinking," you lie.
"Your forehead does this thing." He finally looks up, and his eyes… those big, dark eyes that you fell into like a well you never wanted to climb out of… crinkle at the corners. "It wrinkles. Right here."
"Maybe I'm just getting old."
"You're 23."
"24 in three months."
"Ancient," he agrees, solemn as a funeral. "Should I buy you a cane? Or maybe one of those chairs that lifts you up?"
"Jeon Jungkook."
"Yes, my elderly girlfriend?"
You giggle and throw a sock at him. "You've been weird lately," you say.
"Weird how?" he asks, and his voice is casual, perfectly casual, too casual.
"I don't know. Distracted. Happy distracted. Like you're not telling me something."
Something flickers across his face. Something that looks almost like panic, or maybe hope, or maybe a little bit of both.
"Maybe I am," he says, and then he smiles and pats the space on the bed next to him. "Come here. I'll tell you, angel."
You go because you've always been weak when it comes to him. After all, he could ask you to follow him into a burning building, and you'd follow. The bed dips under your weight.
"Tell me," you say.
"I can't."
"Jungkook."
"I literally can't. It's not my secret to tell…But I promise it's a good secret. The best secret, and when you find out." He stops and swallows… "when you find out, I hope you'll say yes."
Your heart does something complicated in your chest, a backflip, a small, confused seizure. "Say yes to what?"
"Everything," he whispers.
You should push. You know you should push, but he's looking at you like you're the only thing in the world, and you forget how to form words. You forget your own name. You lean in to kiss him because that's the only thing your brain will allow, you kiss him and he kisses you back.
Your mother knows.
She's known since week three, when she came home early from her book club and found Jungkook washing dishes in their kitchen while your father dried. They were arguing about baseball, and your father was laughing. She stood in the doorway and watched them.
"Mrs. Y/L/N" Jungkook had stuttered when he saw her, dropping a plate back into the sink with a splash that soaked his shirt. "I can explain."
"Can you?" she'd asked, one eyebrow raised.
"Not really. No. I'm sorry."
She'd looked at your father, who was doing a terrible job of looking innocent. Your father, who had told Jungkook ‘no’ 13 times at that time, showed no signs of stopping.
"How long?" she'd asked your father.
"13 weeks," he'd said, like he was proud of it. Like this was an accomplishment.
"And how many more?"
"We'll see."
Your mother had sighed then, it's the sigh of a woman who has been married to this man for 22 years and has learned that some battles are not worth fighting. She'd picked up a towel, started drying the plate that Jungkook had abandoned, and said: "He likes the almond croissants from Maison Blanc. But the chocolate ones are better."
Jungkook had stared at her. "You're not... mad?"
"Oh, I'm furious," she'd said, and smiled. "But I'm also hungry, and you two have clearly been eating without me, so you're taking me to dinner. Somewhere expensive."
That was week 13.
⏔⏔⏔⏔ ꒰ ♡ྀི ꒱ ⏔⏔⏔⏔
Now it's week 27, and your mother has become Jungkook's accomplice. She texts him recipes your father likes. She has, on two occasions, lied to you about where Jungkook is on Friday afternoons, which makes her feel slightly guilty, but she's never seen your father have this much fun. Not at your graduation, not at your sister's wedding, not when he finally beat his brother at golf after 15 years of losing. This ridiculous ritual of weekly interrogation is the most fun he's had in decades.
"He's coming today," your father says now, not looking up from his newspaper. It's Friday. It's 3:30. He checked the clock four times in the last hour.
"I know," your mother says.
"He's bringing those almond things."
"You love almond things."
"I tolerate them," he corrects.
She sits down across from him. "You know you're going to ahve to say ‘yes’ eventually."
"Do I?"
"Yes. Because, despite your best efforts, you like him. You like him more than you liked Minji's husband, and you liked Minji's husband enough to cry at their wedding."
Your father sniffs. "I had allergies."
"You had feelings." She reaches across the table and touches his hand. "When are you going to tell her?"
"Who?"
"Your daughter. The person this actually concerns."
Your father is quiet for a long moment. Outside, Jungkook's car pulls up, and your father straightens his shoulders and puts on his mask of indifference to become the man who says ‘no.’
"When he stops flinching," your father says. "Or when she figures it out. Whichever comes first."
"And if she never figures it out?"
Your father smiles. It's a small, complicated smile, the smile of a man who has spent his life teaching other people lessons they didn't know they needed to learn. "Then she's not as smart as I raised her to be," he says, "and Jungkook will have to keep coming forever."
The doorbell rings. Your mother gets up to answer it, leaving your father to his newspaper and his anticipation and his strange, stubborn hope.
⏔⏔⏔⏔ ꒰ ♡ྀི ꒱ ⏔⏔⏔⏔
Jungkook is not flinching today.
He's thought about it all week, actually, ever since your father said those words like a challenge.
He's practiced in the mirror. He's practiced in the shower. He's practiced saying ‘no’ to himself, which felt ridiculous but also necessary.
He stands on your parents' porch with lilies-of-the-valley in one hand and chocolate croissants in the other. He switched because he suspects your father is tired of pretending to like almonds.
I will not flinch, he thinks.
Your mother opens the door. "Chocolate," she says, looking at the box. "Smart boy."
"I have it on good authority that almonds are overrated."
"Your authority is correct. Come in. He's in his usual spot."
The living room is the same as always. The couch is waiting to swallow him. The armchair is waiting to judge him. Your father is waiting to break his heart, gently.
"Sir," Jungkook says. He doesn't sit. Not yet.
"Jungkook." Your father folds his newspaper. "You're early."
"I couldn't wait."
"Eager to be rejected?"
"Eager to try."
They sit. The tea is prepared, black today, not green, which Jungkook takes as a good sign, or maybe just as your mother intervening on his behalf. The chocolate croissants are placed on a plate.
"So," your father says.
"Sir," Jungkook says, and he sets down his cup, and he looks your father directly in the eyes, and he does not look away. "May I have your blessing to marry your daughter?"
Your father opens his mouth to say ‘no.’
Jungkook does not flinch or move, and your father notices. Your father notices, and something shifts in his expression like seeing a student finally understand the lesson.
"No," your father says.
Jungkook does not flinch.
"Okay," Jungkook says. "I'll ask again next week."
Your father leans forward. "Why?"
"Because I love her. Because I want to do this right. Because… because you saying ‘no’ doesn't change what I want. It just changes how long I have to wait."
Your father is very still. From the kitchen, your mother is listening, holding her breath, ready to intervene if necessary.
"And if I never say yes?" your father asks. "If I keep saying ‘no’ until you're old and gray and she's moved on to someone else?"
"Then I'll keep coming," Jungkook says, and he means it. "I'll keep coming because this isn't about you. It's about her. And she deserves someone who doesn't give up just because it's hard."
Your father looks at him for a long time. "You're not flinching," your father says quietly.
"No, sir. I'm not."
Your father sits back. He picks up his tea. He drinks it, slowly, thoughtfully, like he's tasting something new. "The chocolate croissants are better," he says finally. “Do you think I’m being cruel to you?”
"No, I understand you’re being careful."
"Do you?"
"I have a sister," Jungkook says. "She's younger, if someone wanted to marry her, I'd want them to work for it. I'd want to know if they were serious." He pauses, chooses his words carefully. "I don't think you're cruel, sir. I think you're scared. And I think that's okay. Because I'm scared too."
Your father laughs. It's a short, surprised sound, like a cough that turned into something better. "You're scared? Of what?"
"Of not being enough. Of messing up. Of all of it…marriage, forever, being someone's whole world. What if I'm bad at it? What if I hurt her? What if I try my best and my best isn't good enough?"
Jungkook realizes he's said too much, but your father doesn't attack. He just nods, slowly, like he's hearing an answer to a question he didn't know he was asking.
"So that's why you flinched," your father says. "Not because of me. Because of the fear."
"Yes, sir."
"And now?"
Jungkook thinks about the fear, which is still there; it will always be there, he knows that now. He thinks about the future, which is uncertain, which is terrifying, which is beautiful because it contains you.
"Now I'm scared," he says, "but I'm here anyway."
"Next week," your father says. "Bring the almond croissants. I changed my mind. I like them better."
"Yes, sir."
"And Jungkook?"
"Yes?"
Your father turns around and smiles, "Stop calling me sir. My name is Seojun."
⏔⏔⏔⏔ ꒰ ♡ྀི ꒱ ⏔⏔⏔⏔
You are eating a salad when Jungkook finally shows up, two hours late.
"Sorry," he says, dropping onto your couch with the boneless grace of a man who has been through something and survived. "A meeting ran long."
"Liar," you say, but you're smiling because he's here. He's always here, because even when he's keeping secrets, he's keeping them with such obvious love that you can't really be mad.
"Am I?"
"You're wearing a hoodie. You don't wear a hoodie to meetings."
He looks down at himself, surprised, like he hadn't noticed. "Huh. Guess I'm caught."
"Guess you are. Where were you, really?"
"I was," he says slowly, "learning how to be brave."
"Jungkook…”
"And I think," he continues, "that I'm almost there, almost ready., my love." He reaches out, tucks a strand of hair behind your ear. His fingers are warm. "Soon," he promises. "Soon you'll know everything.”
"Okay," you say. "But if this secret is bad, if you're secretly a criminal or you have a twin, I'm going to be mad."
He pulls you close, rests his chin on your head, and you can feel his heartbeat against your cheek. "I love you," he says, like it's a promise, like it's a prayer, like it's the only true thing in the world.
"I love you too," you say..
The Blessing
You are standing in the middle of your apartment holding a spoon when the world changes. Your mother calls, and her voice, when you answer, sounds strange.
"You need to come home," she says. "This Friday. Four o'clock."
"Mom, I have work-"
"Four o'clock," she repeats, "And honey? Don't tell Jungkook."
"Mom...?," you say slowly, "what's going on...?"
But she already hung up.
⏔⏔⏔⏔ ꒰ ♡ྀི ꒱ ⏔⏔⏔⏔
Jungkook knows something is different. He's known since Tuesday, when your mother texted him with instructions for this Friday that were more specific than usual.
Daeun: Wear the blue shirt, and bring the small box, not the big one. She's suspicious enough already.
He's been carrying the small box for four months. It lives in his gym bag, wrapped in an old T-shirt, tucked between his protein powder and his backup headphones. He's taken it to work, to the convenience store at 2 am, when you wanted ice cream. He checks his reflection in the rearview mirror. The blue shirt, your favorite.
Today feels different. Today feels like the last time, one way or another. He drives across town with the box in his pocket and his heart in his throat. He doesn't know you're already there. He doesn't know that your mother finally broke, finally told you everything, finally couldn't stand keeping the secret for one more day. He doesn't know that you're sitting in your childhood bedroom right now, listening to your mother's rushed explanation to you, “Every Friday, for 6 months, he…” with your hands shaking and your eyes filling with tears that you can't quite name.
Are you angry? You should be angry. He kept a secret. A big one. A secret that involved your father and pastries and some kind of ongoing test that you apparently needed to pass without knowing you were taking it. But underneath the anger is something else that feels like being chosen, over and over again.
"Why didn't you tell me?" you ask your mother, and your voice sounds small, like a child's.
"Because he asked us not to. Because he wanted to do it right. And because your father was having too much fun to stop."
"He's been rejecting him? For 6 months?"
"29 times," your mother says. "This will be 30."
"That's…" you stop, because you don't know what that is. Cruel? Romantic? "Where are they?"
"Living room…waiting."
You stand up. Your legs feel unsteady, and you walk to the door, opening it and hear:
"You're late," your father says.
"Traffic," Jungkook replies, and his voice is steady.
You walk slowly and silently down the hall. You can see them through the doorway. Your father in his armchair, the throne, Jungkook on the couch.
"So," your father says. "This is 30."
"Yes, sir."
"You know what I'm going to say."
"I think so," Jungkook says. "But I'd like to hear it anyway."
"You stopped flinching," your father says. "Week 26. Do you remember?"
"I remember."
"I thought that would be it. I thought I'd say ‘yes’ then, and we'd be done with this." Your father leans forward. "But then I realized… flinching was just the first test. The easy one. The real test is what you do after."
Jungkook is very still. "And?"
"And you've shown up," your father says. "29 times. Through my bad moods and my stupid questions and that week where I made you help me clean the garage because I wanted to see if you'd complain."
"I didn't complain, sir."
"Yes, that's right."
You are holding your breath. You realize this only when your lungs start to hurt, when the edges of your vision go blurry. You let it out, slow and silent, and you watch your father's face.
"Jungkook," your father says.
"Yes, sir?"
"Do you love my daughter?"
"More than anything."
"Will you keep loving her? When is she difficult? When she's tired? When she's been your wife for 20, and the newness has worn off, and you're left with just, with her ordinary flaws?"
Jungkook doesn't hesitate. "Yes."
"Will you keep showing up?"
"Every day," Jungkook says, and his voice breaks slightly, but he doesn't flinch. He doesn't look away. "Every Friday. Every Tuesday. Every day that ends in Y, I'll keep showing up until you believe me, and then I'll keep showing up so you don't forget."
"Jungkook," your father says.
"Yes, sir?"
"My name is Seojun."
"I know, sir. I mean — I know, Seojun."
Your father stands up. He walks to Jungkook, who stands too, automatic, respectful, ready for whatever comes next. He puts his hand on Jungkook's shoulder.
"Yes," your father says.
Jungkook's face crumples for a blink…the relief, the exhaustion, the pure happiness of finally being enough.
"Seojun," your father corrects, but he's smiling. "And you're welcome. Now…" he steps back, clears his throat "…you have a question to ask, don't you? Might want to get to it. She's standing right behind you."
Jungkook turns.
You are crying. You didn't realize you were crying, but your face is wet, and your hands are shaking, and you can't seem to make your mouth form words. You look at him. at your boyfriend, at this stubborn, persistent man who loved you enough to endure 29 rejections just for the chance to propose properly.
"You…" you start, and your voice breaks. "You idiot. You absolute…why didn't you tell me?"
"I wanted to- " he starts, and then stops, because you're walking toward him, and then you're in his arms.
"I would have said yes," you mumble into his shoulder. "Week one. I would have said yes."
"I know," he says.
"Ask me," you say.
"What?"
"Ask me. You came here thirty times to ask him, now ask me."
Jungkook's hands are shaking. He reaches into his pants pocket and pulls out the small box. It's worn from being carried, from being hidden.
He gets down on one knee. Your mother appears in the doorway, raising the phone to record this, to capture it, to prove that it really happened.
"Okay," Jungkook says, and he's crying now too; you realize the tears tracking down his face in the most undignified, most beautiful way. "Okay. I've been practicing this. In the car. In the shower. In my head, about a thousand times." He opens the box. The ring is simple, exactly right, exactly you. "I love you. I've loved you for two years and four months and thirty days. Your father told me I wasn't ready. But I think- I hope- I'm ready now. Will you…" He stops, swallows, starts again, " …will you marry me? Will you let me keep showing up? Will you be my family, officially?"
You look at him. You look at your father, who is wiping his eyes with the back of his hand and pretending he's not. You look at your mother, who is crying, who has been waiting for this for weeks when she first saw Jungkook washing dishes in her kitchen.
You look at Jungkook.
"Yes," you say. "Yes, you idiot. Yes, I'll marry you. Yes to all of it. Yes, forever."
He puts the ring on your finger. He stands up, and he kisses you.
⏔⏔⏔⏔ ꒰ ♡ྀི ꒱ ⏔⏔⏔⏔
Later, after the crying and the laughing and your father insisting on opening the good wine that he's been saving for something important, you sit on the porch with Jungkook, your hand in his, the ring catching the light.
"30 Fridays," you say. "You came here 30 times."
"29 rejections," he confirms. "One yes."
"Was it worth it?"
He looks at you. He looks at you like he looked at you the first time, like he'll look at you when you're old and gray and arguing about whose turn it is to take out the trash.
"Every single one," he says. "I'd do 30 more. 300. However many it will take."
You lean your head on his shoulder.
Inside, your father is telling your mother that he knew Jungkook would make it, that he never doubted, that he was just testing him to be sure. Your mother is rolling her eyes and pouring more wine and smiling in a way that says she knows exactly what really happened. That her husband has already accepted your boyfriend somewhere around week twelve, and has been pretending otherwise ever since.
But that's their story.
This is yours.
The future is waiting.
It's going to be exhausting and beautiful and completely worth it.
trope: pediatrician!jungkook x single mom!reader, neighbors to lovers, hot neighbor!jungkook, single mom!reader, pediatrician!jungkook,
genre/warnings: smut, fluff, angst, insecurities, girl mom reader, single mom reader, neighbor next door jungkook, stressed tf out reader, frustrated reader, trying to balance everything reader, my family left me reader, EXTREAMELY SOFT jungkook, kind jungkook, caring jungkook, they have a PHAT crush on each other, unsaid words, reader was avoiding jungkook for a while, doctor jungkook, he tells reader abt infant psychology but i wrote it and i have no idea abt it so it's very generic, kissing, eye contacts, making out, sitting on lap, grinding, thigh riding, humping, tit play, hickies, body worshipping, navel play, oral sex (f. recieving), clit play, pussy sucking, fingering, ass play, all of this on the couch while jk on his knees, orgasm (f), cuddling, after care, SIMP JUNGKOOK and SIMP READER.
author's note: Soooo, just wrote my first smut on here. Uhmmmm, it was exciting but also fucked my brain a little lmao. I may or may not have gotten a lil scared and stopped at just oral sex, hehe. Anw, i received this ask back in may, and i even started writing it. But idk, i guess i forgot abt it and then i found the page i had started writing this on while i was cleaning my room. So i thought why not continue this one and here we go... I really hope ya'll like, do lmk in the comments. Love ya'll, mwah mwah <3
"Ughhh!!!" You're very close to actually ripping all the hair off your scalp. You're even closer to the balcony of your 7th-floor apartment, and you really wanna jump.
You stare at Eunha, your 6-month-old daughter who's currently screaming at lord knows what.
You've done everything you could think of, you tried feeding her milk, but she refused. You tried to entertain her with toys, and she's still crying.
"What do you want, Eunha??" You can't help but get louder, and it only makes her cry even more.
This isn't the first time it's happened. Eunha would cry like this for hours and then fall asleep. The next time she wakes up, she's as cheerful as Jimmy Fallon on his show. You don't understand the psychology behind this, or what goes through her head.
And this horrifies you.
When you decided on keeping the baby, you didn't really know you'd turn out to be so bad at being a mother.
But can you really blame yourself?
You're only 22, working a great job with lots of workload, and parents who abandoned you because of the shame you brought them when you got pregnant at 21.
And not to mention, the father of Eunha, a 22-year-old boy who's just as dumb as a 14-year-old one. He still refuses to believe that Eunha is here, despite knowing he was the first boyfriend you've ever had. You really don't know what you did to deserve this.
It was 11 pm by the time Eunha finally fell asleep. You're currently trying to finish your tasks for the day before 12 am, and you curse the company while doing it. No doubt it's a good company; it supported you financially during your delivery, accepted you for the way you were, gave you the best colleagues ever, and pays you well. But why do they have to make you work while you're on maternity leave? You could really use some time to sleep right now, but no, you have to complete this bullshit work right now.
Around 45 mins later, you're done for the day, like done done. So you shut your laptop and make your way out of Eunha’s room, towards the bathroom to freshen up.
But the moment you start washing your face, oh lord, why's Eunha crying again?!
You quickly wash your hands and run to your baby girl. She already has her arms in the air as if expecting to be picked up. You keep cooing to her, singing lil songs she likes to listen to or swaying her in the living, but nothing works.
"What do you want, baby? Pls tell mommy."
At this point, you're crying too. Your eyes are filled to the brim with tears. And you want to cry just as loud as Eunha.
But your emotions come to a halt when you hear your doorbell go off. "Who could that be?" you think to yourself.
It was midnight, on a Wednesday, and you weren't expecting anyone.
You quickly wiped whatever tears had escaped your eyes and put down your still crying baby in her crib as you came to your living room to check the intercom.
And woah, what's your hot neighbor doing here?
You jump towards the main door and unlock it as quickly as you can. Once you do, Jeon Jungkook comes into view.
Well... to introduce Jungkook, he's a pediatrician who works at a lavish private hospital at the end of the street, turned thirty last month, and is super duper attractive.
You still remember the day you moved in here at the beginning of the year. He'd spent nearly an hour helping you haul those heavy ass boxes into your apartment without complaining once. As a thank you, you'd invited him over for dinner the next day.
Definitely a mistake, because ever since then, you'd been crushing on him like some lovesick teenager.
You'd run into him in the elevator, at the grocery store, at the chemist, even once at the neighborhood noodle place. And with every conversation, he somehow became a little harder to stop thinking about.
Oh, did we mention he invited you to his 30th birthday at a bar? Yeah, that night was crazy. He'd assured you it wasn't going to be some wild party packed with a crazy crowd and that you'd actually enjoy yourself. Well... you did. If it wasn't for your baby girl waiting for you to pick her up from your best friend's place, things might've gotten a little more interesting than just a make-out session.
The tension had been there ever since that night, and you may or may not have avoided him a little. But it was for both your sakes. You weren't entirely sure you'd be able to control yourself if you ended up alone with him again.
But there's no reason for him to be here right now; still, you greet him with a quiet hello, and he returns it with an equally soft one.
Another thing you've noticed? You don't know why, but you turn so fucking awkward in front of him while he looks like the calmest, most composed person you've ever met.
Though... the piercings on his left eyebrow and lip always say otherwise.
"Is Eunha alright? I, actually, could hear her crying for a while now, so I thought I should check on you. In case you need any help?"
His concerned voice takes you out of whatever observation of you had started building about his piercings.
So you reply to him with, "Oh yeah, well I don't really know what's up with her. She's been crying nonstop, and I have tried doing everything..." You move aside, making way for him to step inside.
As he slips off his shoes and walks into your apartment, he catches the panic and frustration you've been trying so hard to bury beneath your voice.
Though he's never been inside before, he barely spares your apartment a glance. Right now, his mind is occupied with figuring out why your baby won't stop crying.
"When did she last eat?" he asks once he reaches her room, standing beside the crib Eunha was in.
"8 pm, she ate properly, even burped 10 mins later and drank some milk cause she needs that to sleep."
Jungkook almost reaches to pick Eunha up before looking at you as if he's asking for your permission. You nod your head, giving him that.
And to your surprise, the moment Jungkook picks Eunha up, she stops crying.
Her small brown eyes, still filled with tears, are now staring at his handsome face, who just picked her up.
"Hunh?" The sound slips out before you can stop it.
Jungkook holds Eunha close against his chest, her tiny face already buried in the crook of his neck as his large, warm hand gently rubs circles over her back. Soon he's slightly rocking her body and gently swaying her left and right.
Your eyeballs almost leave their sockets when you see Eunha's arms reach around his neck. She doesn't even do that to you, what the heck.
Your daughter's a bit too comfy with this stranger.
And in the next 10 mins, Jungkook is already sitting on the couch in the room with your baby, sleeping peacefully in his arms.
You stand there speechless, completely dumbfounded as to how the fuck he managed to do that. Eventually, you walk over and take the seat beside him.
The moment you're about to bombard him with questions, he carefully stands up and lays Eunha back down in her crib. The two of you walk outside her room, into the living space of your apartment.
"How did you do that?" You couldn't control your tongue, brain buzzing with confusion.
Jungkook lets out a chuckle as he finally looks around your well-decorated apartment. He sits beside you on the larger couch, leaving only a small space between the two of you.
He smiles before continuing, "That's my job, Y/N. I'm a pediatrician, remember?" You nod your head at his words.
"No, but still, you gotta teach me that." He laughs at your words, trying to make the environment a little lighter.
"Hey, it's nothing much. You just have to hold them with all the warmth and love you've got. They tend to feel that comfort."
You raised your eyebrows at his words, wondering if he meant that you didn't love your baby.
As if he immediately caught the cue, Jungkook continued, "That doesn't mean you don't love her; you're the only person who will love her the most. But infants, they need to feel it. Because they don't really understand words or actions, so they need that assurance."
He turns his body towards you, his knees brushing against yours.
His eyes don't leave your face, quietly taking in everything you've been trying so hard to hide. The way your shoulders refuse to loosen, your fingers twisting anxiously in your lap, your breathing just a little too shallow. The exhaustion in your eyes wasn't just from the lack of sleep anymore. It was the kind that had settled somewhere deep inside your chest and refused to leave.
Jungkook watches you for a moment, his expression softening with quiet understanding before he finally speaks. "Y/N, I can clearly see how hard you're working for her. And it must be so difficult for you to be... you know, alone in this. So, I understand what you’re going through."
His eyes are full of concern. Not just for Eunha anymore, but for you too.
You don't remember the last time someone was genuinely concerned about you. Accepting that kind of comfort from your neighbor should've felt weird. Instead, it felt oddly natural.
"Yeah, I do wish I could be better at this. I don't want Eunha to go through a bad childhood because of me.
Your eyes were now fixed on your hands, noticing the chipped nail polish you put on months ago.
"I just feel like I'm not enough for her." Your voice was going soft with every word you were speaking.
"You're more than enough for her, Y/N. You feed her on time, you maintain her hygiene, and you do everything you're supposed to. So don't think any of that, okay?" You could only nod your head at his words.
He was right; you're doing everything correctly, so why does it feel like there's still something missing? That you still can't understand your own baby.
"I... I don't know why... why can't I give her the comfort or the safety she needs to feel?" You ask quietly, your face slowly lifting until your eyes meet his.
"Maybe because you're too busy trying to be her father," Jungkook says it gently. The words are blunt, maybe even a little cruel, but not once does his voice carry judgment.
"You know, Y/N... when a father raises a child on his own, he naturally grows into that role. He learns how to provide, how to protect, how to stay strong for them. And mothers... It's a little different.
He pauses, choosing his words carefully. "There's something people call a motherly instinct. It's not something you're born with; it grows. It grows every time you hold your baby, every time you comfort them, every time you simply exist with them. And society doesn't really help either. We've been raised believing fathers are supposed to earn for the family, keep everyone disciplined, make sure everyone follows the rules. The rules they set." A small smile tugs at the corner of his lips.
"That doesn't mean fathers love their children any less. Most fathers would give up their lives for their families without thinking twice. But their love often looks different. Fathers usually try to protect their family from everything outside those walls... trusting that the mother will protect them from everything inside them."
His eyes settle on yours again. "But in your case... you're trying to be both."
Silence settles between the two of you, as he watches your face, almost waiting for the pieces to fall into place.
"So..." you murmur, more to yourself than to him. "I'm only trying to fill that role for her. I'm trying so hard to replace what's missing... that I'm taking away the chance for her to still have a mother."
Jungkook slowly reaches for your hand resting in your lap; his fingers wrap around yours with surprising gentleness.
You suddenly understand why Eunha had fallen asleep so easily in his arms.
"Exactly. You don't have to stop being her father; you just have to let yourself be her mother too."
His voice is barely above a whisper, and his thumb gently strokes across your knuckles.
"Spend time with her without worrying about doing everything right. Let her see the love you already have for her."
Your eyes stay fixed on your joined hands and almost instinctively, your fingers weave between his as if seeking the same love.
God, you now feel what Eunha feels all the time. Cause you feel the same too. Your baby's exactly like you.
You chuckle at the thought. Jungkook notices that, "A penny for your thoughts?"
You look up to find the sweetest smile on his face. "Nothing, just little realizations."
Why? Why are his eyes full of so much comfort and something you can't point out? Why does he look so handsome right now? Why's he so fucking sweet?
You don't even notice your gaze drifting to his lips before dropping back to your intertwined hands. But Jungkook did.
He notices the way your shoulders have finally begun to loosen. The tension that had been wound so tightly into every muscle of your body slowly melting away beneath the silence.
"Y/N?" He calls your name in the softest voice.
"Hm?" Your eyes lift to meet his once again.
"You should take a break too."
You're too busy getting lost in his eyes to actually process what he'd said.
"What?"
A tiny smile ghosts across his face. "I said you should take a break too."
He lets the words settle before continuing, "You're still so young. You deserve to breathe too. Try taking out time for yourself. "
You blink, finally hearing him this time, "How, Jungkook?"
Jungkook's heart tightens at the genuine question from someone who looked as though she'd forgotten what it felt like to put herself first.
His eyes wandered across your face, the dark circles beneath your eyes, and the exhaustion behind them.
But you still looked so beautiful. So tender.
He felt this urge to protect you from everything that's gnawing at your mind, give you the comfort you've been lacking, and all the love you deserve.
A loose strand of hair falls on your face, which he tucked away gently. Gosh, He's so whipped.
He can't keep his heart under control anymore, especially when you're giving him those eyes. But he needs to control, cause he remembers the last time he kissed you and how you've been subtly avoiding him since.
He doesn't wanna ruin this for you. He just wants to be there and provide comfort in any form you want him to.
"You want me to help?" he asks, his tone making it clear that he wants you to be a hundred percent sure.
At this point, you don't even know where this conversation is headed. All you know is that somewhere along the way, the knot in your chest had begun to unravel. You're wrapped up in this weird feeling of... solace, and you don't want to let go.
You couldn't form words anymore, so you settle your response with a nod.
"Can I ask you something first?
Jungkook nods. "Anything."
You hesitate, but you still voice out your question. "Why... why are you so nice to me?"
You glance down at your hands as the question hangs between the two of you for a moment.
You really don't understand why he cares for you. You know that he's kind to everyone, but he still manages to make you feel special, like you are more to him than just a neighbor.
Though after the kiss you shared last time, you hope it's the latter.
A chuckle leaves him, and he shakes his head to himself. "I've been trying not to be. "
He lets out a small sigh, a smile tugging at the corner of his lips.
"Not like it's working, though."
His thumb absentmindedly brushes over your knuckles before he stills it.
"I don't know what happened or how it happened, but now that I think about it... I just started caring."
Your eyes widen at his words, and your heart races at the sight of a shy Jungkook, his ears and neck flushed red in front of you.
Now you feel so guilty for the fact that you've been avoiding him. Maybe it wasn't only you. Maybe what you felt wasn't wrong.
"That night... on your birthday..." Your voice comes out as little more than a whisper, but Jungkook speaks before you can continue.
"We don't have to talk about that night."
Your eyelids flutter before you continue.
"Still... I shouldn't have acted the way I did. I just wanted to tell you..." You pause for a moment. "That I don't regret anything that happened. It's just..."
Your voice trails off.
Jungkook lets out a quiet sigh before continuing, "Me too, Y/N. But I know you've had a thousand other things on your mind."
His voice stays calm. "The last thing I want is for you to feel like you have to carry my feelings too."
He shifts slightly, decreasing the space between the two of you. "I'm here because I was worried about you. That's all that matters right now."
He offers you a reassuring smile. "So tell me, Y/N, how do you want me to help you?"
The apartment falls quiet again.
For the first time that night, the silence doesn't feel suffocating. Eunha's soft breathing drifts in from the nursery, and the weight that had been pressing against your chest for months feels just a little lighter.
Gazing into his starry eyes now reminds you of that night. They hypnotise you in such a way that you just want to get lost in them.
Jungkook's eyes stare right back into yours, and he can't help but notice your shifting gaze between his own eyes and lips.
But he waits for you to make the move; he wants you to do it. He wants this to be about you.
As if some force was pushing you closer to Jungkook, you're now only inches away from his face. His soft breath falls onto yours.
You look him in the eyes again, only to find him staring at you like you're the only person that exists for him.
That look, that was it. You couldn't think about your actions anymore as your lips touch his.
You move your lips over his and Jungkook immediately syncs with you.
Damn, why's he so soft? He smells like vanilla and tastes like coffee. You can kiss him for the rest of your life.
When you break away to take a breath, Jungkook rests his forehead on yours. His warm hands separate from your interlocked ones, and he holds your jaw gently. Like you're the most fragile thing, and he wants to be very careful with you.
Before you even process what had happened, his lips find yours again. This time, it feels more real. You kiss him back with the same effort, both of you devouring each other.
His tongue teased your bottom lip once, coaxing your mouth open. It slides over yours as he tastes every corner of your mouth. God, it feels like you're floating now.
Your hands find their way towards his hair, and you tug on a few strands to stay a bit grounded.
But the kiss deepened as he tongued your mouth, his teeth grazing your lips and tongue, while you let out a needy moan, which he swallowed eagerly.
You fiddle with his lip piercing with your tongue, and Lord knows for how long you've been dreaming about doing that.
You tug at the piercing, making him let out the cutest yelp, and that's probably the best sound you've ever heard.
Jungkook's hand from your jaw slides down towards your neck and then to your arms. You pull away from the kiss for merely a second to climb over his lap, before continuing to make out with him.
His palms now settle on your thighs, which land perfectly on both his sides. He grips them slightly while you couldn't help but grind over his half-hard dick.
He breaks away from the kiss and looks at your completely flushed face. He tucks away the strands of hair that had fallen on your face.
You were already out of breath, body heaving from the intense make-out session. Your hands that were caught in his hair now find their way on his chest.
He lifts your chin lightly to meet your eyes before he asks you, "Y/N, are you sure you're okay with what we're doing?"
You nod your head at his words, already leaning in to continue. But Jungkook places his hand on your chest to stop you. "Use your words and tell me if you really want this."
Your lips parted at his words as you licked your lip nervously, "I want this."
But he still seems unsatisfied with your answer. "You want what, darling?”
You feel something moving in your stomach when he calls you that. Wait, are those butterflies? How old are you? 15? Why are you getting so flustered just by his words?
You blink a few times and take a breath before continuing, " You, I want everything you can give me, Jungkook."
Your words feel final. Like you're a hundred and ten percent sure.
Without wasting any more time, Jungkook kisses you again, and his hands start roaming your body. One of them traces up your spine, and the other hand finds your waist, thumb pressed against the skin.
He lets go of your now swollen lips as he presses chaste kisses down your throat. Each one is slow, tongue flicking against your pulse point. Your head falls back automatically, giving him better access.
The soft kisses didn’t last for long before his teeth scraped lightly, sucking deep purple hickies all over your neck.
“Ahh-ohh.” You let out a gasp at a particularly harsh bite, your nails digging into his shoulders. His tongue soothing the sting.
Your body arched, pressing your chest against him. Both his hands slide down to your hips slowly. Your breath hitches when his fingers slip under your hoodie, squeezing your soft skin.
He takes his sweet time bringing the fabric up; the contrast of his hands against your skin makes you shiver. His thumb brushes just below your belly button, and fuck, your eyes shut at the feeling. He pulled out the hoodie and threw it across the couch.
He pulled back slightly, his eyes running over you, drinking in the sight of your flushed skin. The way your tits heaved with each breath left him in awe.
“You’re so beautiful.” He said as he shifted you, now one of his thigh between your legs. It pressed against your core, making you squirm.
His fingers ran over your body before stopping on your bra strap, and he leaned in close, you could feel his breath hot against your ear.
"Can I?"
You manage a shaky nod, pulse thundering in your ears. With a quick flick of his fingers, the fabric comes undone.
The bra falls off, and the way he looks at you- Jesus, it makes your pussy throb. His eyes rake over your exposed tits in pure appreciation.
His hands cupped your bare tits, and you threw your head back at the feel of his warm palm. His huge hands practically engulfed you, his thumbs brushed over your nipples, and your back arched into his touch.
His finger rolled one of your nipples, and you mewled at the feeling. Your hips rocked against his thigh, and he pressed his thigh harder between your legs.
“Feels good?” he asked you while his thumb circled both your buds before tweaking them at a fast pace.
“Mhmm, ahh,” you pant, your cunt now dripping onto his thigh.
“Tell me how it feels, darling, wanna hear you.”
“So- so good, Jungkook,” you gasp. Your fingers find the hem of his crewneck, tugging impatiently. Soon the fabric joins your discarded hoodie somewhere.
He pulls you back against him, and the feeling of his bare skin against yours makes you grind against his thigh once again. His hands grip your waist passionately while yours run all over his abs and the hard planes of his chest.
When his mouth claims yours again, this time it's hungrier. His tongue sucks yours in a way that makes your heart quicken, and you can't help your fingers curling around his neck to pull him closer.
Soon you break the kiss to breathe, but you can't help but stare at the view in front of you. His lips are slick and swollen, that silver ring glinting with both of your saliva. His hair is a mess from your fingers, and his eyes shine with adoration.
He leaned down, breathing hotly against your tits, as his tongue came out, brushing against the hardened peak. You squirmed pathetically over him, pushing your tits harder into his mouth.
He finally took the right nipple into his mouth, and the wet heat of his mouth made you slightly scream.
He sucked hard, his tongue swirling rapidly, and your hips bucked seeking relief, pressing against his muscular thighs.
“Jungkook.” you moaned.
“Fuckk, darling.” He moved to your other nipple, giving it the same attention while his hand focused on the other one.
“You’re so soft,” he murmured. His voice vibrates against your nipple, and you bite your lower lip to contain yourself.
“I could suck these all day.” he looks at you endearingly.
“Would you like that?” You couldn't speak; his tongue lapped at your nipple before sucking hard, pulling a string of moans from you.
“Answer me, baby,” he urged.
“Yessss,” you blabbered. You pulled him closer, your tits aching due to his persistent attention. He twisted and pinched your nipple, making your clit throb painfully.
“Oh my god!” you screamed, he loved the way your nipples were all red and swollen because of him.
He kissed down your cleavage, his lips trailing over the soft skin of your tits, worshipping every inch of you.
“Just wanna make you feel good.” He groans as his hands slide down your sides towards your ass. He squeezes it hard through your silk shorts, and you couldn’t help but let out a whimper.
“So soft…” he hums in approval as he continues wringing your ass.
You lift your hips for him to tug your shorts down roughly, bunching them at your thighs. His palm slides up your inner thigh, his thumb slightly brushing over your clit through your panties. The pleasure makes you bite down on his shoulder to muffle your moan.
"You like that, darling?" His voice is soft and low.
You press a hum into the crook of his neck, his thumb drawing slow circles on your clit, making your thighs shake.
He pulls your panties to the side, grazing his fingers over your folds but never letting his touch linger for long enough. Your eyes squeeze shut as you ramble incoherent words against his skin.
Before you can even comprehend what’s happening, you feel your body being lowered onto the soft mattress of the couch. You open your eyes, only to find Jungkook on his knees, shuffling between your partly spread legs.
“Will you spread your legs for me?” he blabs against your panty-clad pussy, hands already on the side of your thighs.
You did exactly what he asked you to, as he sucked a spot just above your underwear before he went up again, circling his tongue around your navel.
You felt euphoric at how he was marking you all over with his saliva. His hands then reached for the last piece of fabric on your body, and his eyes met yours.
“Are you okay? Shall we keep going?”
“Yes, pleaseee.” Your hands reached for his hair again, nails scratching his scalp, making him let out such pathetic noises for you.
He kissed your clit over the panty before he slowly slid the fabric down your body, revealing your pussy.
Jungkook stared at you as if he found the seventh heaven. Your folds were swollen, clit peeking just beneath it, and he couldn’t look away from it, his tongue coming out to lick at his bottom lip.
Your breath hitched at how sensual he looked, his flushed cheeks and doe eyes making him look cuter.
Your wetness clung to the bottoms, and he could see the way your entrance clenched around nothing. He leaned down, pressing soft kisses against your inner thighs.
“You’re so beautiful, Y/N.” his eyes locked on your cunt and the way it was oozing arousal.
His lips brushed your mound, and a desperate whine escaped you. He placed a kiss against your pussy mound, “Look at you, so wet f’me…”
His finger strokes your outer lips, spreading your arousal, the sensations making you feel ecstatic. “Jungkook, pleas-unh.”
His fingers parted your folds, exposing your clit fully and blowing cool air on it. His eyes constantly checked you for any sign of discomfort but only found you sobbing out lewd noises at his action.
He spat on your pussy suddenly causing you to flinch, as he watched his saliva mix with your slickness. He parted your folds with his thumb, now exposing your clit fully.
“So fucking pretty,” he cooed.
He couldn’t hold back anymore, so he leaned in, his tongue licking you slowly from your entrance to your clit, and you cried out. He groaned against your pussy as his tongue lapped at your slit, his nose poking your clit.
“mmph-nghhhh,” you murmured curses as you bit into your hand, not being able to help yourself.
“You taste so sweet.” his tongue dived in, now entering your hole, fucking you in and out as your head whipped from side to side. He loved how you tasted, and you smelt sooo good.
He sucked on your folds, his tongue doing different motions until your arousal dripped onto his chin. His loud grunts vibrate against you, making your body quiver involuntarily. You closed your eyes tightly, lost in the feeling.
“Look at me, Y/N,” he coaxed, “Look what you do to me.”
His hands pulled you closer to him, and he pushed your knees until they touched your breasts, exposing your pussy fully in front of him.
“Jungkook- ahmm godd,” you chanted, while he dove back in, his tongue circled your clit before sucking hard and pulling a scream from you. Your hips grind against his face, chasing the pleasure.
“You’re doing so good, darling,” he urged.
He vigorously flicked your clit side to side, and you gripped tight on his hair. “Yessss, grind on my face, ffuck-let me feel you.”
Your thighs shook violently, “jungkook i’m—” you hiccuped.
Your hips rocking faster and faster against his face, seeking relief. “I’m gonna come, Jungkook, pleasee hahh.”
He started eating you out harder, all while his fingers fucked your cunt, making your body tremble violently.
“Yeahh? Then cum for me, darling.”
His tongue replaced your fingers, thrusting back into your entrance as his teeth slightly grazed your clit.
“Ahhh-Jungkookk!” You screamed, your back arching off the couch. Your body jerked against him, as your cum hit him in the face.
Jungkook lapped you through your orgasm, not stopping till he made sure you were licked clean.
“You did so well for me, darling.” He kissed your quivering pussy softly, making you whimper.
Your hands ran through his hair again as his eyes met yours, lips glistening with your juices. He licked his lips clean, his cock still twitching in his shorts.
You lay there still trying to catch your breath, and you tried pulling him towards you. Jungkook stood up, his knees burning from staying bent for so long, as he sat beside you.
He dragged your limp body into his arms, placing your legs over his, drawing little patterns on your back. He pressed chaste kisses on your forehead, nose, and cheeks. You wrapped your arms around his ribs, face already snuggling against his chest.
Jungkook caressed your hair before you spoke, “That was probably the best orgasm I’ve ever had.”
His body convulsed with laughter as he placed a finger under your chin to lift your face and spoke, “I’m honored, darling, though you deserve all the best orgasms in the world.”
And fuck- he feels a flood of butterflies in his stomach from the way you’re looking at him with such dreamy eyes and the shy smile appearing on your face.
He’d do anything if that meant he’d get to see that smile of yours.
You stretched your neck upward, capturing his lips in the softest kiss, making Jungkook get goosebumps all over his body.
You broke away from the kiss some time later while Jungkook continued caressing your back.
“You hungry?” He asked casually. “I can make you something while you freshen up.”
You couldn’t help but look at him in shock, your brows contorting with confusion. “But what about you, Jungkook? You didn’t get to…”
He chuckles lightly, pushing the strands of hair away from your face. “I told you, Y/N, tonight was all about you.”
‘’But Jungkook-”
“I didn’t do this just to get something in return, darling.” He cuts you off mid-sentence.
Your face softens at his words, but you still speak, “But still, I don’t like leaving you like this.”
Jungkook breaks into a smile, his eyes glinting with slight mischief. “Aww, don’t feel sad. You can give me my best orgasm ever the next time we do this, hm?”
“We’re doing this again?” You ask, voice laced with surprise.
“You wouldn’t want that?” He got worried if he accidentally crossed the line, but you reassured him with a shake of your head.
“I’d love that!” You giggled as he playfully kissed your forehead.
The two of you sat in comfortable silence; both of your hearts felt full and content as you simply breathed together, sharing the warmth of the moment.
A piercing noise of your daughter crying comes through her room as you jerk against Jungkook’s body at the sudden sound. You quickly get off his body, looking for your underwear.
You run to her in just your hoodie and your panties, picking her up from her crib. Just like how Jungkook told you and what you saw him do, you gently rub Eunha’s back. You coo at her with several ‘what happened, baby?’s and ‘I love you’s, while gently swaying her left to right.
She slowly stops crying and falls asleep in your arms. Jungkook joins you too, now wearing his own crewneck, and he’s left in awe at the sight in front of him.
“You’re a quick learner, aren’t you, darling?” You turn around to look at him, only to find him gazing at you and your daughter with so much fondness.
“All thanks to you, Doctor.” You say with a teasing smile on your face.
At that moment, neither of you knew that the other person had wished for a life just like this. So maybe the Universe is finally listening to you, and this was a start to your manifested lives.
Hence, moral of the story, keep manifesting bitches!! and do listen to everything dr. jeon tells you. Okay bye byee!!!!
it wasn’t hard when you had it all. you were the prettiest girl at your university by miles, paired with a good brain, a sweet personality and more importantly - you were genuinely nice to be around. every girl wanted to be you and every guy wanted you for himself, a combination that had you ranked queen bee on the social hierarchy, something you had never even tried to do.
it came naturally to you, and that was the part that had people who didn’t like you so envious. you didn’t try to be likeable, you simply were, making sure to befriend anyone and everyone despite their social status, or just going out of your way to be kind to people just because you could. the fact you were so beautiful only added a cherry on top. you were a full package.
even your circumstances had a way of working out. you came from a household where abuse was a norm, and so, you had left at the ripe age of 12, only to be taken in by your best friend, yejin, and her family who you now considered your own. you were treated as though you were blood, with lavish birthday parties, and a full ride to the university of your choice, which just so happened to be the same one your best friend attended - to which you both shared a lovely apartment on campus.
you were perfection defined to all, and yet, they failed to see your one fatal flaw.
obsession.
it was a disease, you knew this much, which is why you kept it under lock and key, a darkened secret only you knew about. it trickled into the darkest parts of your brain where it had begun to fester into tangent thoughts, things that coaxed your throat and soul into a never ending cycle of want and need.
no one understood, no one would, you knew that. how could you explain that you had never been able to look at someone normally without feeling the entirety of your life collapse before your very eyes?
you made it a a rule to never fall in love, not with anyone, not ever. a rule made to be broken it seems for only a few months into your university life, your eyes happened upon the one person that had brought every dark fantasy of your own to light.
jeon jungkook.
oh, that name. it unsettled you. it made you become a twisted little thing that wanted nothing more than to lock him away for your own selfish greed.
you felt pained at the prospect of him looking at another woman, even more pained when you realised he was the one person you couldn’t introduce yourself to - leaving you in a limbo where you couldn’t stomach him belonging to another, and doing exactly nothing about it. what was the point of popularity when it couldn’t even be used for your benefit, in your time of need?
being smart was one thing, jungkook was a genius. he was years ahead of anyone you’d ever met, with a brain so sharp it seemed to annoy him whenever he was sat in your shared physics classes. you sat four rows behind him, three seats to his left, giving you the prime spot to stare at him all lesson, doodling his name in your book whilst thinking of all the ways you wanted him.
it wasn’t sexual, not entirely - of course you often thought of him. you had been with other men on the mere basis that they shared a feature with him, whether it be his large eyes, his smile, his dimpled cheeks - one look and you were able to imagine it was him instead, though it never quite satisfied that deep itch inside of you. it was more than that, though. he represented something fucked up inside of you, something that had your hands shaking whenever you conjured it up in your mind.
he was home, and he didn’t even realise it.
he wasn’t particularly nice, with an ego too large to really make good friends. he had a few, all who were equally as smart, and they would sit at a table quiet, amongst themselves, where you would fight with every inch of your life to not look over despite feeling some of their eyes on you. you were pretty, popular and smart - every man’s dream, and yet it meant nothing if it wasn’t him.
you couldn’t even remember how this began, only that it had no end. he had no social media presence, went to his nerdy, stupid clubs, played his games with his friends and studied endlessly - you needed him like you needed air to breathe.
it was comical really.
hilarious, that you, despite your wit, were not able to see what was so clearly so familiar to you reciprocated.
how was it that jeon jungkook, object of your foul infatuation, had the same incessant need when it came to you?
it was sick, really, the way he felt about you. sweet little thing, shorter than him, smaller in every way, he knew that he could have cornered you months ago and you would have bat your big eyes up at him in that way you often did to others, rendering them weak, wrapping them around your pinky.
it wasn’t enough.
he wanted you in a way that wasn’t normal, it couldn’t be encouraged - he wanted you to belong to him, to own you, to have you so deeply intertwined into him that you wouldn’t know how to breathe without him. that’s how he felt about you, and he was sure you had never even noticed him.
every day, he’d wake, sitting in the same seat of his physics class where the reflection of his laptop monitor would show you sat a few rows behind him, to which he would spend the entirety of his time watching you. though he couldn’t see your face clearly, the muffled reflection of you was enough to have his heart beating out of his chest, as his hand would often crush whatever pen or pencil would have the misfortune of being in use that day.
the difference between you both was simple. jungkook had gotten here first.
he remembered the day his eyes had found you, simply studying in a cafe, his heart looping over and over and over and over. he had sat at the opposite end, watching you, for a straight hour before you had left, to which he needed another on his own simply to recoup.
he wanted to be good for you, throwing himself into his academics just so he could have something to show for. he was a genius, his brain working at a rate much faster than that of the average person, and it didn’t go unnoticed - his professors practically begged for his opinion, job offers going crazy at the prospect of managing to bag such an ideal student after graduation.
he kept them all in limbo, no matter the insane salaries. it would all depend on you; his sweet, angel girl. where would you want to settle? far away, near the coast, where sun and ocean were to be siblings? or would you prefer to stay in the city, where familiarity brought you comfort?
even the thought of you got him hard, his hand constantly having to adjust himself whenever he was even near you.
that’s when the stalking properly began.
first step in making his life easier were the cameras. he installed them mainly in your room, managing to put a few at different angles when you and your roommate were away on a holiday. he remembered that day fondly, having stolen multiple articles of clothing for himself, even going so far as to edge himself in the comfort of your own bed, breathing in the soft scent of your shampoo from your pillow.
second, the tracker on your car. what kind of guy would he be if he let his girl go anywhere, and everywhere without notice? he liked to make sure you were safe, after all, and how else was he supposed to enjoy his weekends if he didn’t know where you were? wherever you would go, he would come too, adorned in a hat and a mask, sat at a distance, but close enough to admire your sweet face.
thirdly? interference.
watching had become tedious, especially when the payout was beginning to become the same. he longed for more, craved to know you in a way that was completely out of bounds. he wanted something bigger, wanted to mould the situation further until it could unravel all on its own.
it started small. a window left unopened, despite you knowing with certainty that you had closed and locked it the night before. then, your lip gloss, a favourite where you carried everywhere diligently, suddenly disappearing. you weren’t forgetful, nor known to misplace things, so its sudden loss became confusing to you.
clothes weren’t being taken, but they were being moved. you liked your wardrobe coded, with summer and spring on one side, and your autumn and winter on the other - you knew once you started realising a few pieces had been messed around with, that someone was actively here. touching, misplacing.
you noticed - how could you not? you were observant, far too in tune with your things to not notice such small details that felt jarringly big to you.
he watched it all with bated breath, and his fist around his cock.
the way your features would pull in confusion, head tilting and pout ready, unaware you were on camera and being live streamed to him and him alone. god. he wished you could see what you did to him, how you had him breathing heavy at the mere sight of you - he yearned to know if it would scare you away.
the thing that began to dawn on him, however, was the realisation that it didn’t add up.
your lack of action, or perhaps your lack of reaction, was the first stickler. your acceptance, however, was a confirmation of something he had only ever dreamt of in his wildest, most fucked up dreams.
you understood.
you weren’t scared, or confused, or terrified at the prospect of someone breaking in. no, you were at ease, as though what you knew of yourself could no longer scare you, even if it stemmed from someone entirely different and this..oh, this. that was what he craved.
he couldn’t stop now that he was aware, and lord knew that his plan was beginning. no longer would he sit in the shadows, watching and bidding his time.
you were his, whether you liked it or not.
the first time he stayed, he didn’t touch anything, a clear difference to all the other times he had become comfortable.
your apartment was quiet, the soft hum of the fridge bleeding into the silence, yejin snoring somewhere on the opposite side of your shared place, all whilst jeon jungkook stood in your bedroom, watching you sleep.
you were so sweet to watch, all curled into the covers, cheek smushed against the pillow whilst you held something tightly to your chest. a little teddy he had left on your bed for you, a sign of his courtship that he could see for his own two eyes you had accepted readily. the sight had him smiling.
his tongue pressed into his cheek as he stepped closer. the sight of your panties, forgotten on the side, had him grunting lightly, his hands reaching out for them almost immediately before pulling them up to his nose, and breathing them in hungrily. his favourite scent.
he had seen you through screens regularly, stolen so many pairs of your underwear just to smell them - this all felt like routine.
you, however, asleep. no, this was out of the norm.
he had never seen you so adorable, so sweet. his girl, he whispered under his breath before backing away quietly.
it wasn’t time. you couldn’t see him just yet, not until you were ready, because he knew once he started, he couldn’t stop.
and so, he gently placed your panties into his pocket, cock hard, shoulders rolling before slowly departing, his heart thumping out of his chest.
he wasn’t ready for you to see him. not like this.
not until you understood.
—
the party was loud. excruciating for some, but the alcohol in your system left a dull hum in your ears as you sipped from the red solo cup, your hair pulled up into a sweet ponytail. bodies were packed so closely, with laughter echoing against each wall, a bright and illuminated swimming pool at the heart of the party where everyone stood in either bikinis or shorts.
this was the kind of place that chewed people up and spat them out whole - a place where you dominated. you fit right in, perched against a corner of the pool with your feet in the water, too small bikini barely covering your tits whilst a scrappy pair of shorts sat on your body. the essence of a university pool party was to be as promiscuous as possible for the night, whilst completely disregarding any man that approached you.
you only had eyes for one anyway.
you were used to the eyes, the attention, the way heads turned when you and yejin walked into a place, but even this felt a little too much. frat parties weren’t to your taste personally, but they were where the vibes were - everyone knew if you wanted to party, you had to attend a kappa pi event, no matter how annoying the guys were. it was simply an opportunity to see and be seen, to get a buzz in your system, let loose and what not.
secretly, you had tried your hardest not to come, but yejin wasn’t having any of your excuses. you had done something, something that felt so inherently fucked up, and yet your stomach was buzzing in a sort of excitement that you knew if anyone ever found out, you’d be demonised for life.
you had hacked into jungkook’s phone.
fuck. it felt thrilling to even think about how you had done it, and a small sense of pride filtered through you veins at the recognition you had done it all by yourself.
many often dismissed you as a pretty girl, but you were incredibly smart. it didn’t take long to figure out the coding needed to hack into his phone, especially when you had been eyeing it for so long - you had spent your last physics class doing exactly that, managing to infiltrate it directly, and now being able to access it in real time on your own.
you could see what he was doing, what sites he’d access, what he’d watch, what he’d do, who he’d text. your body shook in excitement at the thought, brain completely somewhere else as yejin giggled at something a guy whispered into her ear, sipping quietly.
she had begged you to come, unaware of the fight inside your chest, and considering the way you were gripping your phone, she figured you had met a new guy. she was never one to push you, knowing you were oddly private about these things, always respectful of your boundaries - but she couldn’t come to a party like this alone. she won in the end, knowing you couldn’t say no to her.
“we’re gonna get some more drinks. want anything?” she asked you sweetly, to which you shook your head with a small smile, wiggling your eyebrows about the man who had turned his back momentarily.
she let out a small giggle and nod, before standing up, walking away and into the house, leaving you to soak in the water and party for yourself.
water splashed from different sides of the pool as condensation clung to your bare stomach and legs, the slight chill in the air pebbling your nipples, all whilst you tipped your head back in soft thought.
it was exhausting the way you couldn’t think, or exist without him tumbling into your thoughts, demanding your attention, grabbing it without permission. you could feel a constant ache in your stomach at his absence, wanting nothing more than to simply fixate on him from afar. you couldn’t even imagine what he’d be like up close.
you were too caught up in your own delusions to realise the very object of your affections stood only a few metres away from you, chest heaving.
you see, jungkook knew.
he had known before stepping foot into the frat house, phone heated in his palm as his fingers practically crushed it, screen glowing with something that shouldn’t have made sense. it couldn’t be.
he noticed the abnormality almost immediately.
a delay, at first, hardly noticeable to a large majority of people and yet he was different in every way. a man like him, savvy in ways that were not deemed normal, determined something was wrong almost immediately - code didn’t falter unless someone had interfered.
unless something, someone, was inside.
it took him less than 10 minutes, fuelled by anger at first. who the fuck dared to hack him? what could they even want? money? extortion? did someone know about his psychotic obsession with you? his chest flipped at the thought of being found out before he could monopolise on it, before he could have ever even watched your reaction up close. it pained him.
and thus, queue ten minutes of silence in the car as jin, his friend, drove the 20 minute journey to the off campus party, all whilst he sat in the backseat, decoding, deciphering.
he traced lines, rerouted access, digging deeper and deeper and deeper and deeper and deeper until he finally got exactly what he wanted.
once he had found it, he dropped his phone into his lap with a silent, shaky exhale.
you.
it took him another 40 seconds just to be able to pick his phone up without his hands betraying him weakly, his eyes widened, lip caught between his teeth.
he couldn’t stop staring - far longer than what was necessary, or logical. it was as though neither his eyes or brain could comprehend what was in front of him.
your name. you. your access. you. your fingers swiping through apps and looking at things. you. he watched as you entered his photo album, lingering on gym photos, and random pictures he would take of things he needed to remember. you.
he broke the silence in backseat, his friends paying no mind as they chatted amongst themselves, only for him to laugh quietly under his breath in disbelief.
you.
you?
his sweet, angelic girl. you? with your big eyes and pouted lips, so precious it made his heart ache with a need to ruin you. dressed in your baby pink’s and blues, constantly attaching cute little keychains to your bag, an aura emitting from you that he long wanted to get his hands on.
oh, he had misplaced you entirely.
to do something so wrong, perverse..so filthy. hacking into his phone? for what?
his brain had rewired in the span of the remaining ten minutes of the journey to the party, a soft understanding filtering through his body.
he didn’t know you well at all. in fact, he was appalled. here he was, a man priming himself to be your future, and yet he barely knew you it seemed. he had fallen right into your trap of innocence, as though you were free from any of the filth that plagued his mind - only to find out you too were a victim of it.
he could have shut you out. your work was sloppy, too out in the open, it had taken him mere minutes to discover you, and yet he couldn’t bring himself to ever do such a thing.
oh, sweet, sweet y/n. his heart bloomed at the thought of you, a small, genuine smile on his face as he watched you rummage through his phone, even going so far as to sneak through his notes app. his cock pulsed painfully whenever he’d see you linger on one of his photos, a confirmation that you too were so sick in the head.
once the car stopped, he knew the game had finally begun.
jungkook didn’t belong here. it was obvious to anyone that knew him, and to himself - this wasn’t his usual scene, despising loud gatherings as though they were an insult to him personally. his closest friends, all who were as nerdy as him, stared wide eyed as they took in their surroundings, trying to place themselves somewhere that typically excluded them.
he wouldn’t have come, not usually, but he had a very clear objective.
you.
he salivated at the prospect of having you out in the open like this, tits practically on show, tiny bikini whilst you sat so sweetly as you always did, completely oblivious to the way every man had their eyes on you. he was jealous by nature, possessive to a fault - what kind of guy would he be had he not come?
he was in a pair of shorts, forgoing his t-shirt somewhere at the entrance, and he knew he had caught the attention of a few girls himself. he was bigger than most of the guys here, with muscles rippling every crevice, a chest so broad and shoulders so wide they had you closing your eyes tight in thought most days.
one look at you, and his very soul fell aflame.
his jaw tightened, hand crushing his phone slightly as his chest flexed. not through a screen, not through hidden glamours under a cap and mask, no. he was out in the open, watching, staring, salivating.
you were on your phone now, a hidden little smile forming on your lips, almost giggling. one look at his phone and he could see you were still looking through as though it was the most interesting thing on earth, despite being sat alone with multiple people yearning for your company. he was of course one of them.
he couldn’t stand this feeling in his stomach any longer, the excitement, the thrill. the game had shifted entirely now he knew you were a willing participant. you were one and the same, equally as fucked, equally as messed up. he couldn’t think of anything more romantic even if he tried.
his tongue pressed against his cheek just as a girl walked past him, fingers trailing over his chiseled abs in a way to get his attention. he looked down at her, almost feeling an excruciating sense of disgust at the sight of her - another girl touching him, someone that wasn’t you?
his face remained stoic, mean even, despite the sultry smile on her lips as she passed him, no doubt figuring it would be easy to bed the nerd, something that nearly had him scoffing under his breath. once she had properly walked away, his eyebrows furrowed, frowning slightly, before returning his attention back to you.
his sweet girl.
only, this time, you were staring back at him, eyes wide, lip jutted out in a pout, a look of clear upset painted on your features. you weren’t even trying to hide it, your emotions stronger than anything you could conjure up.
he was yours. all fucking yours, and here he was, chiseled and hardened in a way you had never seen in real life, tattoos cherishing much of his milky skin, your chest almost heaving at the sight.
that green, ugly emotion in your chest was fluttering all over you at the sight of him being touched by someone else, so much so that you broke eye contact with him after a few moments, your brain not comprehending the way he too was staring at you, so much deeper than simply looking. you looked to your left, hands turning your phone off as you tried to regulate your breathing.
you felt like you had been punched in the stomach.
you couldn’t even fester on your feelings, as yejin tumbled over to you, grin wide, drinks in hand, her new boy toy following like a lost little puppy, though she paid him no mind, no longer interested.
“got you a drink anyway.” she hummed, sitting beside you on the edge, putting her feet into the pool.
she peered up, noticing your far away expression, the way you were nibbling on your bottom lip, hands slightly shaking.
“you okay?” she asked, voice immediate, eyes furrowed as she examined you.
“yeah.. sorry. just got a bit of a headache, the musics too loud.” you lied smoothly, praying she would believe you.
to further convince her, you took the drink she handed you, wincing only lightly as you drank it all in one go, completely ignoring the burning stare from just behind her.
you couldn’t think. it wasn’t like your brain worked like the average girl’s anyway, you were clouded with this parasitic obsession that clouded every normal thought - how could he? how dare he? were you not pretty enough? smart enough? did you not warrant enough to capture his attention entirely?
your chest only pained further, as yejin began conversing with you, and you kept up, of course, to appease appearances. the thud in your throat was heavy in itself, chaining you to where you were sat, your shoulders hunching up with every wave of deep jealousy.
“i’m gonna go to the bathroom.” you murmured to her. “okay, want me to come with?” she asked, eyebrows furrowed in slight worry, knowing you were being a little different.
“don’t worry, i’ll be down soon.” you shook her head, giving her a small sort of smile, before getting up.
the hallways of the house felt much narrower when you were walking through absentmindedly, thoughts completely adrift, stomach aching in horrible self doubt. too long, too packed, bodies brushing past you as you made your way to the bathroom with the sole intention of locking yourself inside and simply overthinking.
your fingernails dug into the palms of your hands, leaving bloodied crescents as your breath continued to get more and more uneven the more you thought.
how could he?
over, and over, and over, and over.
it didn’t make sense, it shouldn’t have mattered, not to this extent, even you recognised how abnormal this was, but he was yours. jungkook was all fucking yours - you had done the work. you were the one hacking into his phone, invading his privacy and his right to anonymity. it was you, all you, and to have someone else see him when he belonged to you was fucking enraging.
you felt humiliated when you took into account he didn’t even know you.
you barely recognised the heavy footsteps behind you. not until a harsh hand grabbed at your wrist, all but forcing you against the cold wall. a sharp gasp tore from your throat as your body made contact, your shoulders hunching upwards immediately at the hiss of coldness against your skin, a wild difference to the bubbling heat simmering inside of you.
him.
your eyes widened for a fraction.
jungkook didn’t give you time to hesitate, no time to run or turn, your hands being grabbed and forcibly pushed above your head, pinned against the wall. your eyes were large, lips parted with small puffs, whilst he stared at you openly.
you had never been this close to him.
to look at his features directly, with every opportunity to trace the slope of his nose, the soft skin of his lips, the furrow of his brows and the harshness lined in his eyes. he was everywhere all at once, his bare chest emitting a sort of heat that had you almost curling towards him, your own chest lost of any air and comfort.
you couldn’t think, your shaky breath stopping for a moment only to release a quiet whimper that seemed to hit him directly as he too let out a shaky breath.
“where are you going?”
his voice. oh, his voice. so quiet, meant only for you, and yet firm.
like he already knew the answer, only asking to hear his own suspicions confirmed.
your lips parted, your chest still heaving as you tried to pull yourself together. you couldn’t show him how undone you were by his presence, never mind his burning touch - something you know you’d replay over and over until your mind split in half.
“bathroom..” you managed, barely above a whisper.
the weakness in your tone compared to the firmness of his own was visibly jarring, enough to have his eyes trace each and every one of your features. your nose, to your lips, cheeks to your eyes, all down the panels of your neck.
he acted as though he had all the time in the world, as if this wasn’t highly inappropriate given you were both technically strangers. oh, how ignorant you were to your own surroundings.
“you look upset.” he murmured, tone void of any concern. instead, laced with recognition - as though he knew to read you better than he could himself.
you swallowed harshly, jungkook watching your throat with his own bated breath.
“i’m not,” you said quickly. too quickly. “it’s just loud, i..it’s just..”
his thumb pressed into your pulse, feeling it jump.
lie.
“you’re a bad liar.” it felt like a warning.
a beat.
you exhaled through your nose as he eased the pressure on your wrist, gently rubbing his thumb as a means to ground you once more. you wanted to relax, wanted nothing more than to ease in his touch but all you could think about was how close he stood to you, his cologne, both of you scantily dressed, your bikini top doing nothing to cover you modestly.
“look at me.” he whispered, your eyes having fallen to his bare chest as you began to space out into your own thoughts.
you peered up through your weighted lashes, breath still uncontrollable. the intensity, it had your stomach jumping painfully, the eye contact both too much to handle and yet you never wanted him to look away, feeling scared it would be ripped from you before you could think.
“what’s wrong?” he asked again, softer, body inching closer, thumb pressing into your pulse once more.
you simply shook your head in response. you couldn’t bring yourself to say it. how could you? he let her fucking touch him. her hands, rubbing over the same skin that was now beginning to press intimately against you, as though he wanted it branded in his bloodstream.
the silence between you stretched, as he pushed, and pushed, and pushed. your chests were openly touching, his head dipped low to capture your eyes properly, legs intertwined now. had anyone walked past you both, they would have naturally assumed you were making out given the intimacy of the stances, the sheer nature of the way you were pressured into the wall.
you were suffocating from it. you couldn’t think. you couldn’t comprehend. not when the only thing you were seeing were her hands, a flicker of genuine anger and a roar of jealousy holding you hostage.
the words slipped out before you could really do anything about them.
“you let her touch you.” you whispered, voice fragile.
the three seconds of silence between you felt like a lifetime multiplied. your eyes widened as you comprehended what had just left your lips, a streak of fear gripping your heart. you watched his eyebrows furrow, head tilting just slightly as he absorbed your words.
the quiet dropped like a weight, as you watched in real time his features completely transform from that of someone intense to a man who felt too dangerous to be good. he darkened, eyes growing lidded, lips growing slack.
“what?” he calmly asked, as though your response held more power than anything else physically possible.
too calm. far too steady.
you shook your head immediately as it dawned on you what had truly left your lips. you had let out your deepest, darkest self in front of him simply because you were overwhelmed by his presence. stood, forced to the wall, body against body, breath mingling with breath.
“i..didn’t..no..”
“no.”
his hands left your wrists, slowly easing them down whilst maintaining eye contact. once your hands were down, immediately, his own brushed up to your face, both palms cupping your jaw possessively, pulling your chin upwards.
“say it again.” his voice was breathless.
his grip was neither gentle nor cruel, but you could feel it in every facet of your stomach. you couldn’t move, made to feel every inch of his darkened stare, whilst your own fingers gently gripped his wrists, shaking.
he knew exactly how much pressure to use against you. knew exactly what had you spiralling, and what grounded you, opting for a gentle mix of both.
you couldn’t help your emotions, feeling your bottom lip begin to tremble, eyes growing glassier by the second.
“you let her touch you..” your chest rose sharply, voice breaking at the end of your sentence. “she was..and you just..she was all over you.”
your lips pressed against one another harshly as a means to silence yourself, heart spiralling whilst your brain begged you to see reason, to quieten in front of him in fears of such harsh rejection.
you tried. you truly did. you didn’t want him to know, didn’t want him to see.
but you were already gone. your voice had cracked, your eyes were already glassy, lip already trembling. it was as though he had cheated, indulging in another woman with his heart and soul when it had been nothing more than a fleeting touch, a norm for a place like this. you couldn’t rationalise that though, not when you were so deeply obsessive, so intensely fucked up in every way.
jungkook let out a loud, shaking breath.
you were heartbroken. over him?
he couldn’t believe it. he couldn’t fucking believe what he was hearing, what his eyes were seeing, what his heart was bouncing to. you? his sweet, gorgeous girl, so hurt because of a fleeting touch from a woman who he hadn’t even spared a proper glance at? he hadn’t reacted to her touch because he had barely computed it, as she meant nothing. was nothing.
to know a 3 second interaction had you about to cry, so bothered you had to physically remove yourself from the environment, shaking with each passing step. fuck, fuck fuck.
oh, you were the world and more. look at you, he thought, his head coming down to press against yours so gently, such a juxtaposition to the way he was holding you so firmly, so harshly as though you were ready to run away. a part of you was prepared.
his thumb pressed against your shaking bottom lip, as you tried so hard to hold your tears back, looking like a pathetic little baby. his baby.
“you didn’t like that.” he confirmed. not a question, but a clear cut statement, whispering it down at you to show you he understood.
you simply nodded, letting out a shaking breath, sniffling lightly. you felt fucking humiliated, your mental illness out for him to see in the ugliest of ways, all the whilst he cradled you like this wasn’t absolutely absurd - no one normal would have reacted the way he was reacting.
fingers began spreading over you, one hand leaving your jaw and travelling down to your neck, lightly wrapping. not squeezing, but merely holding.
you felt anchored.
“hey,” he nudged his nose against yours, breaths beginning to mingle from how close your faces were. “look at me.”
you listened, watery eyes meeting his.
the way he was looking at you confused you entirely. you were used to men looking at you because they wanted you, or because they wanted something from you - this was completely different. jungkook looked down at you as though you represented something deep inside of him, a look that you knew you held for him and him alone.
a look of full, unadulterated obsession.
“i didn’t touch her.” he promised, lips grazing your skin. “she touched you..” you corrected shakily, eyes begging to close at the feel of his touch.
“and i let it pass.” he promised, shaking his head lightly at you. “didn’t let it go on, didn’t give her nothing.”
your lips parted but you couldn’t bring yourself to say anything. he watched you think, watched it click in your brain, as though you were stranded in the desert, thirsty, whilst he brought you a pitcher of water.
“you think i’d let someone think they could have me?” he almost spat, as though the words were offensive. “when you’re there? sat there?”
your breath caught so sharply it hurt.
“what?” you whispered.
his gaze didn’t waver. “you heard me.”
he leaned in closer, his nose brushing openly against yours, nuzzling as the corner of his lips began to graze your own, your eyes falling shut immediately.
“i saw you. smiling at your phone.” he murmured, feeling your pulse quicken underneath his hand. “you think i wouldn’t notice? all my pictures, my notes, my text messages, my fucking call logs.”
your eyes shot open in shock. your lip began fully trembling now, a hardened noise leaving your chest as you held back a soft sob, scared at having been discovered. you knew this would ruin you, make sure you’d never even be able to have a friend again, never mind exist.
more importantly, you would lose him, jungkook, the object of your infatuations.
“hey. c’mon baby. it’s just me.” he shook his head at you, cooing. “it’s okay.”
a heavy tear escaped, dribbling down your face pathetically. “i-i..”
your body was shaking.
“it’s okay.” he reiterated, eyes deceptively kind, warmth plastered over you as he kissed over where your tear trailed. “i liked it.”
you let out a noise of confusion, a whimper paired with a shake of your hands.
“i like knowing you’re in there, looking at my stuff. i like it so fucking much.” he breathed, his own eyes closing momentarily. “just how i like knowing where you are.”
a sudden stillness enveloped you.
no longer were your limbs rattling, or your eyes widening - the tears remained, fresh and hot as your orbs began to overflow as though the words leaving his lips could have only been conjured in the faintest of dreams. jungkook was speaking, and yet your brain was barely comprehending, not quite understanding. he liked knowing where you were.
he liked knowing where you were.
he liked it.
the knowing.. what did that mean? what did that represent? what was he referencing, symbolising, alluding? your brain was failing you, and as bright as you were, you felt smaller than you had ever in the entirety of your life simply trying to keep up.
tears were streaming easily now, and he couldn’t help the soft coo he released, soothing you with gentle eyes as though what he was saying was normal, casual even. none of this was healthy, not from your side, especially not his and yet you felt your crumpled hands faintly touch upon his chest.
you couldn’t help the bloom of romance in your stomach.
how sweet, how romantic.
“what does that mean?” you asked him through your tears, fingers digging into his chest as a means to feel closer to him, almost shamelessly.
your question didn’t land lightly with him.
it didn’t drift between you, didn’t penetrate the clawing tension between you by softening the air or easing the lump in your throat. no, instead, it sank. heavy, thick, debilitating, you could almost feel your legs ready to give out despite the fact you were bordering on sobs, the fear of being found out slowly being replaced by something so much bigger, so much more compelling.
he didn’t answer you immediately.
instead, his hand on your throat tightened. slowly, not enough to cause you any semblance of pain, but enough to show you he was there, to remind you, to rid your brain of any thought that was now clouding your judgement. this was real. he wasn’t a figment of your sick fucking imagination, something to soothe the illness deep inside of you, the parasite that claimed you head from toe. he was real. this was real. you were real.
his thumb pressed into your jaw, harsher now, tilting your head up just a fraction, causing you to look into his gaze. his heart gave him away, however, as you felt it thud meanly against his soft skin. you felt so exposed, so on show, seen in a way where you could feel him inside of you.
his eyes dragged all over, committing each inch to painstakingly detailed memory, as though you were a prized jewel and he a mere sailor.
“you don’t know?” he murmured, voice low, laced with a somewhat sense of amusement - not mocking, but in a way that was clear he found you endearing. as though your tears and confusion were the cutest thing he’d ever seen.
your brows pulled together as a hiccup left you, tears still streaming with no intention to stop. you shook your head then, small, uncertain, and it finally had something inside him snapping.
“fuck.” he exhaled harshly, more to himself than you, his forehead dipping to gently brush against yours once more lingering as though it was hardly enough. like he needed to ground himself before the cracks in his very soul were laid to bare in front of you.
“it means,” he started slowly, “that i’ve been watching you a lot longer than you’ve ever even looked at me.”
your breath hitched.
a sharp involuntary noise, something you couldn’t control no matter how hard you tried, your fingers now digging into his chest as a means to regain some sense of control.
he noticed. of course he noticed. his lips twitched just fucking looking at you.
“don’t do that.” he whispered with an almost accusatory tone, head shaking. “don’t act surprised now.”
you shook your head, so much faster this time, as though you were fighting to prove your innocence despite it being the furthest thing from the truth. the shame inside you hurt, but he was here too soothe it.
“i don’t..i don’t understand..”
“you do.” he cut in firmly. he leaned in close to you, your breaths mingling as your lips sat mere centimetres away from one another. “you’re too smart not to.”
your lips trembled. he was right.
you did understand - perhaps not entirely, not in a way that had you deciphering his words, but the strain in his voice. the harshness that came with it. he was telling you something your brain often echoed over and over to you. he was showing you the same disease up close, and your mind recognised it, saw it for what it was, what it could be.
home.
you were a cocktail mix of thrill and fear, your fingernails digging so harshly into his skin that he was sure you’d break it, with small tiny cuts beginning to form, not that he minded. he felt branded by you, a fucking dream come true.
“the windows,” he continued quietly. “things that went missing, your clothes..fuck, your panties are my favourite. you started leaving them in places i’d find. started making it so much easier for me.”
you breathed harshly.
“you noticed all of it. i know you did, because i watched you, studied you. yet you haven’t said a word to anyone.” his words were a jumbled mess, as though he was making sense of it in front of you. “why?” he asked, so softly, so gently.
it was a question with only one answer - you were smart enough to know that. it seemed that he already knew, and yet, with the way he was holding you, the way you clung to him, he yearned to hear it from you. not for it to be coaxed, but for you to sincerely say it.
your chest rose and fell once more, eyes leaking beyond control as a horrible sob left your lips, finally broken, entirely ashamed. the words slipped out before you could stop them, before you could ever dampen them down from a mixture of embarrassment and pure humiliation at being caught, alongside a dangerous streak of want that truly couldn’t have lessened even if you tried.
“i..” your voice barely audible. “i didn’t want it to stop.”
you closed your eyes as your hands finally let him go, cuts in the shape of crescent moons tight into his chest as your hands flung to your face, cradling your features away from him through quiet cries.
you prepared for him to push you away, to sneer at you in disgust, into disappointment, into anything that resembled any form of sanity that any other person would have gladly shown you. the thought of losing something you had never truly even gotten to have despite needing it more than anything was enough to have your knees buckling, your body shaking.
what you didn’t expect, however, were the large hands on your body to cradle you so sweetly, pulling you into an even larger chest, so that your face was engulfed entirely by jungkook. both arms held you delicately, causing your brain to malfunction as your now reddened orbs looked up only to meet his, your breath stolen by the look of pure yearning.
oh, sweet y/n, he thought to himself.
it was as if you had written him a sonnet.
a soft smile was directed down at you as his beefy biceps caged you into his body, even softer kisses placed against your forehead. your hands were still hiding your face slightly, and though you couldn’t stop your crying, the look of confusion that he was met with was so endearing, he couldn’t help but let out a shaky sigh.
“there she is..” he whispered down at you, eyes filled with an emotion you couldn’t place.
“hm?”
“i was wondering how long it would take until you finally showed yourself to me.”
“what?” you hiccuped.
your fingers slacked around your face as your body racked with a mixture of both half sobs, and harsh hiccups, your chest fighting for breath, all whilst your brain struggled to keep up, his touch intoxicating, burning into your skin. it was hard to comprehend this was even happening.
“you liked it.” he repeated, smile so earnest you would have thought you’d given him the greatest gift on earth.
his arms loosened around you, though his touch only got more and more daring. one hand slid up to your cheek, pulling you closer to him whilst the other took a hold of the back of your legs, sweeping you up in a notion that was far too easy, as though you weighed nothing.
the shock of suddenly being suspended into the air had you leaning into him immediately, arms flying around his neck as he simply led you into the bathroom, closing the door with his foot. instead of putting you down, you watched as he sat on the edge of the tub, sitting you down onto his lap, manoeuvring you like a doll without thoughts.
soon enough, your legs were on either side of him, your arms still wrapped around his neck, both of your barely clothed bodies pressed in a way that had you hiccuping again, a loss of air in your lungs now causing you to become light headed.
your chest was rising and falling, but he too matched you. it was like neither of you could believe this was real, that you were touching, existing, talking, holding one another like it hadn’t just been revealed you both liked to stalk each other.
the thump inbetween your legs got louder and louder until it was all you could feel, and from the way you were sat, you wanted more, wanted to sit a little forward until you were seated right against him, but the fear in your chest kept you rooted.
“don’t cry, baby.” he whispered, the quiet sound of music from downstairs echoing against the walls. “don’t be scared.”
you sniffled, eyes meeting his, fingers gently daring to brush against the back of his head where hair sat ready to be touched. his thumb pressed into your pulse on your wrist as his head pressed against yours, his body cradling yours as though you were the sweetest thing he had ever seen, his girl. his, sick, stalker girl.
“you just wanted to see me, right pretty girl?” he cooed down at you, causing you to nod through a hiccup. “nothing wrong with that. it’s just like i wanted to see you.”
your lips parted slowly, nodding, breathing still difficult. his words felt so comforting, the sickness inside your brain soothing now that it had been assured. you felt at home, so at peace.
your heart strummed harshly from the skin to skin contact as you peered at him almost nervously, your chest jolting from hiccups, your makeup utterly ruined. his words were also rattling in your brain, echoing from side to side as you tried to comprehend them, tried to understand them in a way that felt rational. instead, romance bloomed in your chest, the woman from earlier a distant memory as the same thing rolled in your mind over and over.
he just wanted to see you.
you.
all you.
for a moment, the world narrowed down to that simple truth.
you.
jungkook watched it in real time. your eyes began to droop, soften as you sniffled, lips still quivering with each passing moment. your hands on his neck lessened in grip, a sort of acceptance, a gentle comfort in the way you realised everything you had ever wanted was possibly here, right now.
this wasn’t fleeting, not like the attention you received daily from others. it stayed deep inside of you, wrapping around your ribs, curling around your heart until it suffocated you, precisely like what you had wanted.
“yeah,” he whispered, breathing in your scent, your perfume mixed with alcohol, eyes tracing your own. “that’s it, sweet girl.”
“i wanted it to be you.” you admitted in a small voice, no longer afraid, but still hesitant. “i knew things were being moved and taken in my room but..i didn’t want it to be anyone else.”
silence spanned between you, a moment of quiet in what had felt like an admission of the century.
your words hit him hard visibly, as he let out a shaking exhale, eyes shutting so tightly you could see the strain in his jaw. his hands shook as he held you, holding you much tighter suddenly - you couldn’t think outside of him. you watched him with bated breath, sniffling as your hands slipped from his neck, and instead slid down his chest.
“not anyone else.” he repeated finally, processing your words.
his own hands moved, no longer cradling you as they now moved to the back of your head, fingers threading into your hair, neither gentle nor rough. possessive.
“say that again.”
you blinked up at him softly. “hm?”
“say it again.” his voice sounded heavier, harsher, as though finally, your admission had undone him entirely.
your lips trembled. “..i..didn’t want it to be anyone else but you..”
and in that moment, you had ruined jungkook completely.
a broken sound left his chest, a cross between a laugh and a shaking breath, his head dropping forward as his grip on you tightened so much harsher, pulling you flush against him. you were pulled forward, pressing both of you against one another in a way that you could feel him against the flimsy denim of your shorts, the two of you unable to look away.
“fuck..” he whispered again, but for the first time, he sounded wrecked. overwhelmed. his nose brushed against yours, frantic now, like he didn’t know where to put himself. “do you know what that does to me? what you’ve just said to me?”
you broke the eye contact, peering down at how you sat so directly against him, brain pulling you in a million directions as you both lightly grinded your cores against one another. the action felt so natural that neither of you were even doing it consciously, your bodies simply doing it for you. the pleasure was low, but you could feel it heavy in your stomach.
it grounded you.
“i’ve been in your apartment for fucking months.” he admitted, no shame now, no hesitation, just honesty. “been watching you. installed cameras in your room, got one in your shower..fuck. my girl, aren’t you? my sweet, sweet girl.” he rambled, breathing in your scent.
you heart bloomed so softly, your eyes watering once more.
“waiting for you to notice..wanted you to notice so badly, y/n. i needed you to know it was me. didn’t even think you knew i existed.”
your quivering lips parted to let out a noise of rejection, as though the notion was insanity in itself. you had noticed him immediately.
“i see you, see all of you, and i want it. i want all of you, i want that sick fucking part of your brain because mine is sicker.” he admitted, voice so much harsher than before. “you’re all i think about, all i can ever see, i wake up, study, and watch you. that’s it. i orbit you.”
his other hand gripped your hips, grinding you harshly against him as his actions began to become readied, assured. he was playing with you purposefully.
“i like following you too. i know your coffee orders, know what sizes you wear, know where you like to study.” he whispered this, as though it was a secret only for you to hear. “you’re branded on me. took your panties every chance i got because it’s the only thing that gets me off anymore. need to feel you, need to feel close to you.”
a strangled noise left your throat, as you clung to him tightly, your own hips moving in unison as you tried to hold back your tears. your heart was ready to explode out of your chest from a mixture of overwhelming joy. the man of your dreams was picking you, the real you, openly because he too was like you. sick in the head.
“i didn’t touch that girl.” he added suddenly, tone suddenly filled with venom, a tone you had yet to hear from him. he was offended beyond belief. “i’d never touch another woman other than you, y/n. not when you’re right here.”
his words finally broke you, as you once more, burst out into deep sobs.
you were being seen.
you were being chosen.
every negative emotion that chained you to gaping hole in your mind was brushed away, letting the darkness exist finally within its own right. others would have demanded it to close, to hide away, to make sure they never even caught a glimpse of it.
jungkook wanted to nurture it. he was picking you, choosing you, based on it, because of it.
“you hacked my phone because you went looking for me.” he whispered, his own eyes glistening lightly, cooing as he wiped your tears earnestly. “baby..i..i’ve been building my life for you.”
“really?” you desperately asked through your cries, body shaking in his arms.
he nodded, chest rising and falling at the sight of you, his sweet, gorgeous girl.
“you’re not too far gone.” he promised. “you’re just finally catching up with me.”
the movement between you began to slow as you began to hold one another, finally giving in to your desires, your cheek against his bare chest, openly breathing in his scent as you sobbed, and sobbed and sobbed.
minutes later, when you had finally managed to calm, and his chest sat glistening from your tears, he pressed a soft kiss to your head, causing you to look up through sniffles and hiccups.
“you’re tired.” his thumb brushed under your eye, catching the dampness that still remained as though it personally offended him.
you didn’t think to argue. he was right.
not physically, more so something deep inside you. you could feel the exhaustion in your bones, deep inside your stomach, through the ridges of your brain - you felt both alive and dead all at once.
you simply nodded at him, causing a soft grin to form on his face.
“i want you to go home.”
your brows pulled together faintly like you didn’t quite understand.
home?
his hand slid down to your thigh, squeezing once gently. “go home, get in bed, don’t wait up, okay? just go.”
you stare at him. it felt like an instruction, felt like care.
“but..what about you?” you asked, voice croaky from your earlier cries.
his lips twitched into something small, a sense of assurance lifting in his shoulders, relief clear on his face from the way you pulled at him.
“i’ll watch you.”
you knew those words should have felt wrong, and yet, they settled inside of you like a kiss to the soul. your breath managed to steady for the first time that night.
“okay.”
no hesitations. no questions. no thoughts. no concerns.
his eyes darkened at the thought of you so pliant for him, as though you wanted him to simply think on your behalf, a role he was more than happy to fulfil.
within the next ten minutes, jungkook cleaned your tearful face of any mascara streaks, you had spoken to yejin who jumped up to take you home immediately, as a good friend should, and you were already in your apartment.
it took another half an hour to properly prepare for bed, but once you were, dressed in nothing more than tiny little panties and a tank, you felt safer than you had ever in your life. wrapped in the plush of your covers, your cute teddy bear sat somewhere on the bed, your washed hair pulled out of your face - it was the assurance that jungkook could see you right now that ultimately led you asleep.
he too had managed to get home, preparing for a nightly visit to his laptop. he had gotten it out, positioning it on his lap as he watched you sleep like a baby, all curled up, so sweet, so darling.
his weepy girl. he had just begun in telling you his feelings, but now, he knew it was time to actually show you. the thought had his stomach bouncing in knots.
—
life after the confession remained oddly the same. you were sure that a big tsunami of change would come, a pit of anxiety in your stomach forming at the unknown, and yet everything felt eerily familiar. once you realised it was because he had been a constant in your life, whether you realised it or not, from day one, it all became clear. you woke up each morning, knowing he was watching you, showered knowing he was watching you, ate your breakfast, brushed your hair, got dressed - all of it. you did it with the knowledge that he was watching you.
you didn’t expect it to feel so safe, so comforting. a constant state of surveillance would have upset anyone else, but to you? each time you woke up, knowing he was there, it felt like a declaration of unadulterated love. your heart bloomed to know jungkook cared for you so much he couldn’t ease a waking moment without you, even using you in the background when you slept just so he too could relax.
anytime you would catch him in the hallways, neither of you pretended anymore. you simply looked, stared even, fingers grazing secretly as an act of acknowledgment. you wanted him, he wanted you more but alas, the game was not done.
oh, not at all - why would either of you stop when he had just began?
to have you so willing was merely a bonus on top of everything.
the quiet between you and jungkook grew with each passing day, but with it, an assured comfort - you wanted more, as did he, but taking the first step was difficult when all you had known was one another in a different state. to hide in the shadows felt safer.
the announcement came on a grey, dark thursday, with misted clouds collecting in the sky, condensation heavy against the windows of your university campus. it was the sort of afternoon that made winter feel heavier, quieter. slower. students were half sleeping, half listening, whilst the scratch of pens and and laptop keyboards echoed throughout the lecture hall.
your professor droned on and on as you continued to doodle, as you had been doing for the past hour. his monotone voice filled the space whilst you peered over the dark screen of your laptop, positioned in its usual way to glance at jungkook any chance you got. again, though you couldn’t see his face, it didn’t deter you.
you continued marking your notebook as you long abandoned your physics work, instead opting to draw little loops of jk, jungkook and tiny hearts you blacked out, with the intention of doing more and more. all this whilst pretending to make notes on quantum states, a content look on your face.
pathetic, you knew, but there was a sense of security in knowing you didn’t have to hide anymore. there was comfort in it, and that made you feel good enough to not care anymore if anyone watched what you were doing. the guys who sat beside you were curious enough, always trying to flirt, always trying to get your attention - one look at your battered notebook and they got the message loud and clear.
you were halfway through tracing his surname next to your own name for the twentieth time that session when professor choi cleared his throat, demanding everyone’s attention.
“now, onto the research practicum. i don’t want to hear any of you whining about not being able to find someone to partner up with, so i’ve taken it upon myself to put you into pairs.” he said, adjusting his glasses. “no changes. no swaps. you’re all adults now, and i expect the best of your ability.”
everyone groaned around you, causing you to sigh quietly underneath your breath. you were sure you’d be paired with someone who barely knew anything, in hopes of supporting that student - you couldn’t be bothered to pick up the slack for two people, and so, you sat there, eyes closed, already feeling the low buzz of annoyance.
names were called, people either happy or hiding their frustration, causing you to cringe when you realised your name was up next.
you braced.
“y/n y/l/n, you’re with..ah, yes. jeon jungkook.”
a beat passed in the room.
your pencil dropped from your fingers, clattering against the table loudly before you moved to collect it instinctively, your shoulders raising high in a mixture of shock, confusion, alarm and suspicion. your body went still in a way that felt violent - not butterflies or nerves, but instead, something so much darker.
you could feel your stomach cave in itself as your professor continued rattling off names, heat rushing to your cheeks, chest, fingertips. shallow breaths left your lips as you nervously peered over your laptop screen to gauge something, anything.
only, he wasn’t there.
not in front of you, three rows down. not where you felt most safe seeing him, in the blur of the back of his head, face obscured and figure present. not where he always sat, broad shoulders hunched over a screen, fingers tapping in that restless, impatient rhythm you could sometimes hear if you strained hard enough.
your heart stuttered, almost pained.
was he..not happy?
immediately, your brain went into overdrive as your now shaking hands cupped one another, lip bitten hard to hold back the intensely overwhelming waft of emotions in your head, toying with the idea that he didn’t want to be around you. the game was over. he realised how deeply messed up you were. he hated you. he was disgusted by you. he thought nothing of you.
an almost whimper left your lips as you considered that you may have imagined it all entirely - that perhaps your brain, so primed to have everything circle back to him, had merely conjured it up.
your hands were shaking harder now as you tried to relax your restless body, the onslaught of your demeaning thoughts beginning to take over you, feeling the emotion rise in your throat and pull at your eyes. you looked down at your notebook, adorned with his name, almost ready to weep.
a chair scraped next to you.
slow. deliberate. purposefully harsh.
the sound cut through the room like a blade, a few people even turning to look at such a loud noise, some grumbling in annoyance and others turning away.
you, however, looked up, with teary eyes, letting out a small exhale of what could only be described as relief.
there he stood, jungkook, laptop gripped, bag slung over his shoulder whilst his notes sat comfortably in his notebook in his other hand. he was maddeningly calm, as though he had every intention of taking up all of your personal space, like it was his and his alone.
your entire nervous system felt ablaze as you watched him sit down, not bothering to spare anyone around you both a spare glance, ignoring the professor ahead, attention on you and only you.
he noticed the beads at your waterline, the way your lip jutted out gently in a quivering pout, all against your will. his chest tightened, half in awe and other half absolutely enamoured by how sweet you looked - there was nothing he loved more than seeing you up close and personal like this, but seeing you so visibly emotional?
he wasn’t a fool, especially when it came to you. he knew you inside out, knew that you liked to stare at him all lesson just above your laptop screen, and figured once you hadn’t seen him after being paired, your brain began assuming the worst.
his silly girl.
he knew, of course he knew.
the second he had sat down and caught the dew in your eyes, and the way you hid your trembling lip in that telltale way you had when emotion threatened to overspill, his very fucking soul tightened at the mere sight of you.
you had thought he didn’t want this. didn’t want you as his partner.
didn’t want you.
the idea alone was offensive to his personhood, a concept that felt both foreign and false - he couldn’t even fathom it. he knew you were different, and despite being equally as fucked up, you were still his angel girl who processed things differently to him. he knew obsession manifested in different ways but his heart genuinely pained at the thought of you so delicately upset at the thought of it being a reality.
his jaw flexed once. twice.
his things were put out properly, his laptop beside your own, as the other students in the room began to copy him, walking over to their partners. this gave a moment of private reprise between you as he looked, properly looked at you.
jungkook swore something animalistic stirred in his chest at the sight of you. so soft, so devastated, all for him.
he leaned in closer, inappropriate even, as your perfume wrapped around his brain so harshly he felt as though he was in your room, engulfed in your scent.
“hey.” barely a whisper.
your big eyes lifted, wet. so ruined.
he nearly folded. “look at me.”
he wasn’t commanding you, no. he couldn’t bring himself to do that when your brain was already being unreasonable, his voice carrying a tone of hurt that had you meeting his gaze immediately despite how you felt. you obeyed, of course you did, no matter how damp your lashes were.
you felt so embarrassed. you were emotional by nature, but this was different. he was different. you had never wanted anything more in your entire existence, and you were still grappling with the fact he knew about your filthy obsession for him - so much that your brain often failed you whenever you’d think about it for too long, rendering you useless. thus, the negative thoughts came running in.
“did you think i left?” he asked.
you couldn’t bring yourself to answer him.
that, however, was answer enough.
his eyebrows furrowed as a flash of hurt ran over his face, only making you nibble on your lip further as a means to stop the quivering, looking away momentarily before meeting his gaze once more.
“sweet girl.” he breathed, a reprimand heavy on his tongue. he sounded like heartbreak personified. “just moved so i could come sit next to you.”
the words landed heavily inside your chest, falling all the way into your heart and dripping down to your stomach, a sense of reassurance you weren’t expecting engulfing you. unfortunately for you, you felt your lip quivering so much more, as you desperately blinked the tears away, so embarrassed to be crying in front of him again.
you nodded a little, hearing his words, the relief soothing every crack you had created within mere seconds of overthinking. he watched you, watched your cute face, the way you sank into your chair, the way your hands clutched the messy notebook on your lap.
his eyes did a double take.
your notebook.
his lips parted as his gaze settled on the book inbetween your hands, and more importantly, the page you had been doodling in for god knows how long. you snuck a glance at him, eyebrows furrowing a little by the intense stare at your hands until you realised exactly what he was looking at.
your blood ran cold.
all those stupid hearts. his name. your name. both of your names together. his last name with your first name, decorated and coloured, worshiped as though it was the prettiest thing your fingers could bring yourself to spell. they were dreams in black ink.
your hands instantly moved to shut it, but you were way too slow. his palm covered the page before you could shield it from him, hand touching yours openly, both warm and possessive. you were struck by his touch, your entire body stilling once more as you felt the sparks ignite in your stomach, all whilst he pulled it away from your lap, and into his own.
he kept his hand against you, now sat in you lap, whilst his other hand flickered through the pages almost eagerly. too eager.
his hand on you traced your thighs, touching your fingers, holding them against his in a warm embrace, grounding you, feeling the rush through his veins just feeling you. he could see from the corner of his eye your shoulders had relaxed massively, but the anxiety on your face was still evident as he flicked through pages and pages and pages and pages of his name.
jungkook stared and stared and stared, fingers tracing jagged paper from where you’d gone over certain letters a hundred time to tattoo it to the book. a shaking breath left him as he looked over your name matched with his last name.
y/n jeon. fuck.
“looks right.” he whispered, under his breath, but your hypersensitive body caught it immediately.
you looked at him immediately, gaze intense as you watched him, listened to him. his tone had become so much rougher, a hint of desperation tinging every last sentence. your chest rose and fell harshly as you absorbed his words, every inch of your very soul clinging to it like a lifeline.
jungkook took a hold of your pen, letting go of your body for a moment, to which you almost chased it back with a whine. he angled it on the paper, on a completely new page, and began doing the same as you, writing out your name along with his last name, the action bringing him more pleasure than anything he had ever done in his life yet. he was breathing heavily, hands slightly shaky as he traced and traced and traced and traced.
bravely, you reached out for his arm, fingers pressing into the skin gently as your large, teary eyes brought him back to you. the small action of him affirming you only nurtured the growing parasite in your brain, confirming to you why he was worth obsessing over - he was everything.
instead, he took a hold of your hand once more, before slyly bringing it to his lips, kissing over your knuckles one by one. then, kissing your ring finger, as though it was an act of promise, his darkened eyes never leaving yours.
“that name,” he tapped against the book, “i’ll make it yours.”
you were relieved that the room was chaos, with people chatting loudly, moving around, the professor still looking through his notes, allowing you both to converse freely, as you took a sharp intake of breath.
what better gift to a sick mind like yours and his, than a promise of eternity?
“really?” you managed to choke out, desperately fighting tears back as you begged yourself not to cry, not again. you just couldn’t help it. you felt so weepy around him.
“the plans i have for you, y/n..” he shook his head lightly, as though offended you would ever even think otherwise. “gonna get us a house, a ring on your finger. our kids, our pets.”
with each word, you watched a look of genuine bliss overcome him, as he shifted in his seat, as though the thought of such a dream life, his guaranteed future, aroused him to a scary degree. you could see the tent in his sweats begin to form, as he rolled his shoulders, legs wide enough to carry no shame. you, on the other hand, had shifted so much closer to him, your bodies now sat side to side, your hips touching, his hand intertwined to yours and pressed into your lap.
“i want all of that.” a tiny wounded noise left you at the end of your sentence, as you finally looked down at your hands, holding his tighter. “so badly..”
jungkook was fucking enamoured by you. his sweet, angel girl - your heart was too big for your body. look at the way you got all upset at the prospect of everything you had wanted confirmed. god, it had him hardening by the second, moving your tied hands over his bulge as both a means to hide it and to simply feel your touch.
you nuzzled against it immediately, though the action was hidden by the notebook by any prying eyes. his jaw hardened as he looked down at you, watching, observing, the two of you a sight for sore eyes indeed.
in the background, your professor dismissed you all as he gathered his own things, but neither of you made an effort to move, too busy caught up in each other’s feel, as your fingers caressed his hardened bulge. not enough friction to get him off, but your curiosity, your light touch - it felt better than anything. paired with those teary eyes? fuck, jungkook was ready to scream.
the room emptied pretty quickly, and no one, again, speed either of you a glance. the two smartest students paired together? it was obvious you just wanted to situate yourself in your partnership, and so, soon enough, you sat alone in a large, echoing room.
he couldn’t stop staring at you.
he moved the book, pushed it onto the table before letting go of you entirely, though your touch remained on him. he grabbed your chair and yanked, pulling it until you all but practically fell onto him in proximity, grunting lightly under his breath at the feel of you all over.
“mm. my girl, aren’t you?” he whispered lowly, as his thumb reached out to trace your bottom lip. “my soon to be wife. it’s inevitable, baby. it has to happen.”
you nodded through his words as you sniffled a little, your emotions catching up to you. “and you’ll be my husband, forever and ever?”
“always. fuck.” he nodded immediately, eyes closing for a second at your words. “why do you think i work so hard, hm? gotta give you the life you deserve, y/n, gotta make sure you get everything you ever want.”
silly boy, you wanted to scream into his face, as your lip quivered once more, a lone tear finally escaping as it rushed over your cheeks. all you fucking wanted was him. you didn’t care if you were in a run down shoebox for the rest of your life - as long as he was there, and he was yours, then it was fine. he belonged to you.
you felt overwhelmed. you felt like you were barely together.
jungkook’s expression changed evidently - not soft, never that. he seemed determined.
his hand tightened against yours, as though he was trying to understand how you had ever even reached your original conclusion, as though he genuinely couldn’t understand the way your brain worked despite it mirroring his in so many different ways. how had your brain turned the inevitable of him and you, into a mere possibility? you had no choice in this, didn’t you understand?
and so, without really thinking, his hands darted out for you. one on your waist, the other on your hip, lifting you with a practised ease and straight onto his lap, hearing your strangled gasp and not caring a second. his girl crying over him? a concept that typically would have had him snapping his hips into yours meanly, but this was different. how much more did he need to do, to get you to understand?
your legs sat on either side of him, your cute skirt flowing on each side of you too. he pushed you right against him, your lips parting in shock as you could feel him directly against you, bulge against damp panties, your teary eyes now forced to look up at darkened ones peering down at you.
“your brain is making you think stupid shit, y/n.” he said, almost meanly, though the way he was caging you in, the way his head dropped to yours was anything but. “what part of this made you think i don’t want you?”
“no..it’s just..you moved and..”
he sighed a little, thumb pressed onto your lip once more as he lightly shook his head at you. he was pushing, and pushing, until it slipped into your mouth, resting it on your tongue.
the heaviness had you wrapping your lips around it instantly as you stared at one another, your tongue lapping at it gently, though you teary eyes remained. it felt charged, sexual by nature and yet given the circumstance you were in, it was so much deeper.
“listen to me.” his tone dropped as his eyes darkened, earning him an obedient nod as you continued to lick and suck lightly, all whilst he cradled you into his lap like you were the sweetest thing on earth. “there isn’t a scenario, a factor. anything. that could make me not want you, y/n.”
his voice felt mean, harsher than you’d ever heard it, but with the way your shoulders slumped, it was exactly what you needed.
“no scenario could stop this. you could change your mind tomorrow and decide you don’t want this, baby, and i still wouldn’t fucking stop, you understand me?” he pushed his thumb deeper into your mouth. “there’s no escaping me. no escaping any of this.”
you nodded again, just as he removed his thumb from your mouth, panting lightly at the sight of a thin string of saliva connecting you and his digit. he’d replay that memory tonight.
“need you stop thinking.” he whispered then, just as your arms clambered up, wrapping them around his neck to pull him in closer, breathing in his scent. “keep working yourself into circles that don’t exist..i’m right here.”
your entire body eased, like a switch had been flipped and all of your negative thoughts had finally been eradicated. his voice, his presence, that heaviness to his voice - it all softened the hardened edges of your brain, causing you to practically slump in his arms. he could feel it too, from the way your tightened grip lessened, but you grew more comfortable in his arms.
you looked so pretty, he thought, as he properly took his time in examining you. a touch of makeup, your sweet pink jumper, a cute shirt peaking out from underneath and white skirt, you were the epitome of adorable - he wanted nothing more than to preserve you like this forever, all flushed cheeks and gentle eyes. this was why he was so deeply infatuated, how could he not be?
“this is new.” he muttered quietly to himself as his hands tugged at your jumper, fingers playing with the hem before sliding underneath, just to touch against your skin directly.
you blinked up at him. “hm?”
he was taking it in, looking at the way your skirt had bunched due to the way you were sat so intimately against him. he could feel the dampness from your panties, and though he was obsessive, he was a gentleman first - he simply pushed his bulge firmer against you to offer some relief.
the pretty sigh that escaped you was enough to have him offering you a slight smile, so enamoured by his gorgeous girl.
“you didn’t have this before.” he tugged at your jumper.
your heart boomed at his attention of detail - no doubt after months of breaking into your bedroom and going through all your things. fuck, it was so romantic it hurt.
“i just got it yesterday. do you like it?” you asked a little shyly.
“fucking love it, baby. love it so much.” his response was immediate, causing a big smile to form on your face almost instantly.
now that. that floored him.
he couldn’t help but match the grin on your face with a huff of amusement, enjoying how quickly your mood had changed from a single compliment. he’d be sure to do it more often.
“been staring at you the whole lecture, couldn’t focus on anything else.” he admitted through his own grin. “you look so cute.”
your hands met at the back of his neck, playing with the stray hair that had grown too long, your smile doing enough to brighten his entire day. the mood had shifted between you, something akin to playfulness as you quietly conversed, despite your intimate position, small giggles leaving you whilst he whispered things, allowing for a moment of ease. this was new, and outside the realm of heavy emotion you were both used to.
it felt fresh, rewarding even, to be able to just talk to him without your brain whizzing a million miles per hour. it felt good, and just looking at him, you could tell he the felt the same tenfold. he made a comment that had you giggling even louder, your head thrown forward towards his shoulder to which he too, matched you, laughing quietly, ego skyrocketing from the way he could make his girl laugh.
fuck. knowing all of these months of such meticulous stalking had led him to here, right now? he’d do it again in a heartbeat.
his laughter softened first.
not fully gone, but quieter, like it had gotten caught somewhere in his chest whilst admiring you, his sheer emotion for you so much bigger, suffocating it down. his hands beneath your jumper, holding onto your skin so firmly stilled as he tilted his head back, listening.
footsteps.
voices.
faint at first, but growing louder in the hallway outside.
you didn’t notice, not when you were too busy tucking into him, too comfortable, too content. you felt settled in a way you had never felt before, breathing in his scent whilst mumbling something about the project, light little comments without thought.
he noticed though, of course he did. his blood boiled at the thought of someone interrupting you when you were so soft, so relaxed - jaw tightening. you were in your own world, completely unaware of reality that sat just behind double doors metres away.
fuck.
he didn’t want to move you.
didn’t want to shift you when you were so happy perched on him, lightly grinding your core against him for relief, all the whilst keeping up normal conversation - you were the epitome of sweet, all warm and soft and exactly right.
but he wasn’t about to allow anyone see this. see you like this.
“hey.” he murmured, quietly.
he watched as you hummed, not pulling away, not even bothering to look up from your position - just nuzzling closer like you hadn’t heard a thing.
his mouth twitched with fondness.
“baby.”
that got you.
you lifted your head slowly, blinking at him, dazed, as though you had been pulled from a dream like state.
“we gotta move.” his thumb traced your cheek.
you shut your eyes tight immediately, with an almost bratty shake of your head, going back to your position immediately. “no..i don’t wanna.”
that did something to him.
he bucked his hips into you, causing a low whimper to get stuck in your throat. he nuzzled his nose into your hair, breathing in your scent intimately as he rubbed your back.
“yeah..i know.” he said, more to himself than anything.
unfortunately for you both, the voices outside the room were only getting louder, meaning people would be walking in any moment now. he made the decision then.
one hand slid from under your jumper,smoothing it down properly - almost subconsciously. he knew you didn’t like to look dishevelled, always appearing perfect no matter where you went, and despite your dazed brain, he would keep that up for you of course.
“c’mon.” he whispered, watching your arms tighten around his neck with a frown as he picked you up just as he stood, easing you back down onto your feet himself.
the pout on your face had him almost groaning out loud from how cute you looked, with a face of genuine upset lining each of your features at having to leave such a soft state. you felt so good, and now it was all over, a horrible sinking feeling filling your tummy at the thought. he couldn’t bare to look at you like this, not when he was half hard and sporting a small wet patch on his crotch from where you had been lightly grinding, and certainly not when you were looking at him like he was capable of hanging the moon and stars.
“you wanna go home?” he asked you, quiet, as he gathered both of your things.
you nodded, dejected at the thought of the day coming to a close with him, unsure of whether to reach for his fingers now you could actually hear people outside. you weren’t sure what to do now you had broken another wall between you.
your fingers twitched at your side, like your body was fighting an internal battle - one half desperate to grab him, the other half still battling the normalcy you had both been playing into for weeks.
jungkook noticed, of course he did.
his eyes dropped to your hands, the way you were shuffling them, before he shifted closer, arm sliding around your waist with ease. he held all of your things in one hand whilst you slipped your half empty bag over your shoulder, one hand on him at all times, holding him tight to you.
his jaw flexed, subtly, thinking too much for a man who had spent his entire life finding answers coming naturally to him.
“i’m coming with you.” he said, with a tone of finality.
your breath caught.
you looked up at him, eyes lighting up more than he had ever seen, face filled with a level of excitement that had him softening in front of you. his shoulders slumped lightly at the sight, a faint smile forming at the way you looked up.
“really?”
“yeah.” he nodded, laughing lightly. “come on.”
his hand slid down to properly intertwine with your own before he pulled it up to his lips, planting a soft, buttery kiss so faintly on the back of it, you wondered if he had done it at all. he led you to the doors, large back almost hiding you completely due to your size difference, something that had your brain leaking with every chance.
the hallway was much busier than either of you had expected, confirming his decision to get up when you did. the thought of anyone else seeing you so pliant truly made him angry, the deep, sadistic part of his brain igniting at the sheer idea.
you couldn’t help the soft smile that was present on your face as you looked at your intertwined hands, biting back a bigger grin as he led you through, not sparing anyone else a single glance. you were the most popular girl on campus, someone who rarely dated, never gave anyone a chance, especially not people that were deemed to be on your social calibre and yet here you were, hand in hand with a nerd from your physics class.
to say people were staring was an understatement.
your heart was beating out of your chest as you felt jungkook squeeze your hand, offering you a look as he pulled you flush against him. the both of you walked beside one another, all whilst people whispered, some gawking, others analysing you both in genuine confusion. none of them knew.
none of them understood the sick fucking idolisation you both had interlaced into each other’s minds.
he dipped his head as you walked to the entrance, this thumb still caressing your head. “you look so fucking pretty.”
your stomach flipped.
“you already said that.” you flushed with a gentle pat to his arm, something that had his dimpled cheek on show.
“and you deserve to hear it again.” he said almost casually, causing you to giggle behind your hand, flustered beyond belief.
by the time you reached the exit, the air around you felt so much different. it felt charged, both cold and sharp, and yet it did nothing to cool your overheated body. if anything, you felt even more aware of him as you left the safety of your shared campus and out into the real world, out into reality where things were so much harsher - more real.
his hand. you were hyper aware of it now.
the way it refused to let you go even as he pushed the door open for you, guiding you through like it was an instinct. despite the heavy stares, he remained dismissive of everyone else, it meant little to him after all. he wasn’t used to the looks, but it came with the territory - you were the hottest girl on campus, and you were all fucking his.
you both slowed on the steps. not completely, but enough to have you coming to a pause.
you looked up at him, all starry eyed. “my place..or?”
and there it was. jungkook’s jaw twitched, his eyes darkening instantly as he took a heavy step towards you.
“mine.” no hesitation.
your breath hitched, lips parting.
“it’s closer.” he explained. “and i don’t feel like waiting.”
your stomach was flipping violently as all you could give him was a pathetic nod, fingers clinging to him harsher than ever.
and this time, when he pulled you close, leading you to his car that was parked relatively nearby, there was no hesitation whatsoever. jungkook was a man starved, finally about to take his fill - every inch of you. all his
—
stepping foot into jungkook’s apartment was exactly what you assumed it would be.
he was a meticulous person by nature, and as a result, his living space depicted that clearly - rows of bookshelves all neatly arranged, whilst the decor remained minimal and clean, tones of navy and cream throughout. there were little things, things that didn’t quite match if anyone else had walked in, but to your eye, you understood immediately.
a pink and white throw sat on the edge of the couch, folded. you recognised it to be the exact one you had conveniently ‘lost’ two weeks ago. rows of candles sat among the bookshelves, some completely used, scents you recognised as the exact ones you’d often buy. it wasn’t until you looked closer that you realised they really were the candles that were once in your own room.
you turned to look at him, a small smile pulling at your lips.
he met your gaze, quiet, simply watching, examining even, to see your reaction. to see the romance flourish from behind your eyes felt assuring in ways he didn’t realise he could feel, and yet here he was.
he watched as you put your bag down, tucking strands of hair behind your ear, already feeling comfortable. you couldn’t explain it, but being here felt the epitome of safety, and you knew that was his exact intention, a soft sigh of content leaving your lips as you took a few steps forward, your shoes by the door.
“smells so nice.” you murmured quietly, looking over your shoulder as you walked into his space properly.
“i bought the diffuser you like.” he responded smoothly, watching a smile pull at your features in real time.
“you’re so cute.” you squeaked, hands rushing to your own cheeks as though you couldn’t take it. instead, his darkened eyes narrowed. “don’t call me that.”
you ignored him, letting out an exaggerated sigh of fondness as you walked into his kitchen next, fingers brushing against his clean counters, peering at the snacks on his dining table.
“these are my favourite sweets.” you hummed absentmindedly, picking up the pack of sour cherries.
he didn’t respond, causing you to turn on your heel, to peer over and see where his attention lay. upon looking at him, you noticed a gentle dusting of pink on the tops of his cheeks, his ears stained red. it wasn’t that he had any shame in stalking you, non whatsoever - this just felt different. it felt domesticated, or as domesticated as it could get between people as fucked up as you both.
your scents, your candles, your blanket, your favourite snacks. it was like his space was curated in mind of you and you alone. as though his only thought process was that everything in his life went back to you anyway, and so it naturally made sense to come home to something that felt like you. of all the things he had done, all the things he had said, it was this. this that truly made you feel wanted.
and so, once you stopped your thinking, you found yourself walking back over to him, all as he watched, stood, examining you. his eyebrows lifted in partial shock as you immediately wrapped your arms around his waist, holding him to you as though you were a koala desperate to be held.
he immediately reciprocated.
his arms wrapped around you also, holding you close to his chest as you snuggled deeper, breathing in his scent almost hungrily. as your eyes met, he couldn’t help but stare at the freckles held in your eyes, something choking him from the inside from the mere look you gave him.
you were transcendent, beyond belief and theory - he knew in his heart of hearts he wasn’t worthy of one inch of you, and yet he would never let you go. you were all his, until his dying breath.
“it feels different to what i thought it would be like.” you admitted, in a small voice, eyes cast down to his stomach momentarily before resuming your stare at him.
“what?” he rasped, voice tight.
you let silence settle between you for a second.
“i’ve always wanted you. i just..i don’t know, i guess i never thought of there being a reality where this could actually work, i mean.. i didn’t exactly think you’d be like me.” you confessed, eyebrows slightly knitted.
it was his turn for his eyebrows to furrow.
“you could have had me,” his voice sounded rough. “you could have had me the moment you saw me.”
“not in the way i wanted.” you immediately shook your head.
he looked confused.
“it’s hard to explain, okay? i don’t know.” you sighed a little as one of his hands lifted, cupping your cheek. “just always thought that i’d have to hide this side of me so i wouldn’t scare you away, and now that this is real and it’s happening, i just..i never expected it to be like this. it feels different.”
he absorbed your words.
he understood them, of course he did. he differed from you openly - he had always known that if he was to get a taste of your company, he’d keep you shackled to his obsession under lock and key. you, however, were so sweet, so darling - how could he listen to your words without his heart aching so gently?
“no matter how disturbed you feel by your own brain,” he whispered then, thumb tracing your cheek. “no matter how fucked up, just know that i’ve done it too. i’ve done worse and just because i have you, it doesn’t mean i’ll stop. you know that, right baby?” he almost cooed.
your eyelashes fluttered gently, as though you were being told a fucking lullaby.
“promise?” you asked.
instead of responding, jungkook released your face, instead planting the sweetest of kisses to your forehead, breath slightly shaky as he pulled away. taking a hold of your hand, intertwining your fingers, he stepped back slowly but surely. your eyebrows knitted as you watched him edge towards another door, one you assumed was his bedroom.
he didn’t rush you. never. it wasn’t in his nature to make you despite his certainty - so used to being unyielding in every other aspect of his life. every move felt measured, calculated, as though whatever sat behind the door of his bedroom held more weight than anything you were able to conjure.
“c’mere.”
you followed without question.
his room was dimmer than any other part of his apartment, with blinds drawn to only allow for small slivers of sunlight to bleed over his oak flooring. everything sat in its place meticulously, almost too well, with his large bed made to perfection, his clothes cung, ironed crisply and his desk.
his desk sat in the corner of the room, and though the space was large, it took up a considerable chunk considering the three monitors that sat idly, waiting to be turned on.
his space was odd. you couldn’t quite put your finger on it, but a small part of you assumed that he kept it pristine on purpose - perhaps in hopes that it would be ready always for you. you nibbled away on your bottom lip, eyes taking in everything as he continued to lead you inside, your scent seemingly everywhere. it mingled with his own.
your brain went blank as he turned to face you, properly now, leading you over to his chair, rolling it out lightly before taking a comfortable seat. you watched him, head tilted, almost ready to question what he was doing before his arms darted out at you.
large hands grabbed at your waist, pulling you back until you were being pushed onto his lap. he situated you so your back touched his chest comfortably, a position you were very quickly enjoying as you could feel his hands quite literally all over you.
you felt secure, safe. you felt entirely whole in his arms like this, so much so that you let out a soft sigh, just as his head dipped. his lips began grazing the skin of your neck, letting out his own deep exhales, breathing in your scent so openly it had your thighs trembling. he could feel it. could feel all of you. you on his lap, snuggled into him, his aching cock already nestled against you. you felt like home.
the shaky breath that escaped you pleased him greatly, as it acted as direct confirmation of how you felt. just like he did.
“eyes on the screens, baby.” he whispered down at you, catching you staring at him over your shoulder. “c’mere. got something to show you.”
you properly rested against him now, watching as one of his hands darted out to the mouse, his computer finally turning on.
the shy smile that formed as you watched him type in his password, your name, to access his desktop was beyond anything. he could feel the way you curled into him deeper, even going so far as to grind against him lightly. enough to have him bucking up at you, but also not enough to ever claim anything other than mere innocence.
you watched as the screens came to life, jungkook clicking a few things, moving others around as he took his time in whatever he awaited to show you. you were beginning to get restless, moving around on his lap, nibbling away on your lip a little more - you had all of his attention and yet you wanted so much more of it, until you were fully overwhelmed.
“stay still.” he let out a sudden hiss.
you flushed.
you hadn’t realised that your panties were practically stuck to you, skin to skin, from how wet you were getting. from the moment in the classroom until now, you had been horny, that was for certain, but this was different. jungkook had yet to even kiss you, and yet you were grinding yourself on his cock like it was the most normal thing in the world.
suddenly, you were brought out of your haze, your hips stilling for a second as you tried to comprehend what your eyes were seeing before you on the screens.
was that..?
your gasp was loud enough to echo around the room, as jungkook’s hands now sat firmly against your stomach, refusing to let you go, despite what was directly in front of you.
your room.
the camera angle was situated to the top of your wardrobe, tilted so it had the perfect angle of your entire room, most notably your bedroom. your bed still sat in the way you had left it, done, with your teddy sat comfortably in the middle. your makeup station was as messy as always, as you had ran slightly late, causing you to assure yourself you could just clean it when you were home.
the flashing red dot in the corner was what had you struggling to breathe.
live?
“jungkook.” your breath caught, sharp and fragile, like it might shatter had you moved whatsoever.
he continued planting kisses to your neck softly, guiding upwards until he reached your jaw and cheek. “keep looking, baby.”
the second screen shifted. your bathroom. notably, your shower.
this one sat high, connected to the ceiling of your shower, tilted downwards so it was all it could see. that had you gasping even louder as you lurched forward, his grip breaking on you as you examined the screen from up close. a sick part of him wanted to punish you for leaving his arms so easily, but he draw an exception - you were too cute when you were shocked.
your heart began pounding out of your fucking chest. not out of fear, not quite - something else, something much heavier. something that made your skin tight with want, the very parasite in your brain singing loudly as it interpreted this in the only way it knew how.
jungkook loved you.
you could see it now, see it clearer than ever, as your throat began to constrict, holding back a wave of emotion you truly weren’t ready for. you leaned back into his arms after a few moments, to which he simply watched you watch the screens, as though this was the exact moment he had waited for.
it was.
god. jungkook had never been harder watching the realisation settle into your face, into your body. he told you, he had told you from the second he had revealed himself to you that he liked to watch you. you had no idea to what extent, but of course the following you around grew tired after a while.
no, see, he needed something else. something entirely his, that infringed on your very personal being - he wanted to take something from you so it could become his too, shared. he chose your privacy.
you turned to him then, eyes filled with teary wonder, a shaky smile forming on either side of your lips.
“you watch me?” you asked, desperate to hear it confirmed on his lips.
to that, he simply tugged you closer to him, firmly pressing you on his cock once more. “all the time. always.”
you shuddered, fingers clinging to his own that clutched your body. you didn’t know what to say, didn’t know how to voice the utter devotion trapped in your throat, not when he was so openly displaying his own. you genuinely believed this to be the most romantic thing anyone had ever one for you, and with the way your pussy soaked him through multiple layers, he knew.
“when you sleep,” he murmured almost thoughtfully, “you curl into your pillow. “cutest thing i’ve ever fucking seen.”
you couldn’t speak. not when your heart was pounding so hard.
“and when you shower..” his eyes shut for a moment, as though imagining. “fuck, baby. you can’t blame me, right? all that water over these tits.”
he was whispering into your ear, rough hands suddenly travelling up to cup your breasts, both engulfing as though it was his every right. you breathed out, immediately closing your eyes at the feel of him massaging, pulling, cupping, squeezing.
you couldn’t speak, couldn’t think. you were staring at your own bedroom, your most intimate space, all whilst he sat, all but worshiping you within the four walls of his own. he continued planting kisses to your neck, your cheek, your head, breathing in the scent in your air whilst long fingers began to unbutton your shirt, pushing your jumper up to your chin, revealing skin with each passing movement.
you let him. of course you did. this was every dream and fantasy all in one.
cold air brushed against bare breasts as he pulled your lacy bra down, just enough to release them, his hands immediately returning to them to provide the attention you deserved.
you let out a smooth whine, all whilst he too huffed under his breath, as though he couldn’t fathom he was touching you like this. he nuzzled his nose into your hair, just as your head tipped back, his fingers circling your nipples, pulling at them gently.
“like watching you play with them..” he whispered then in your ear. “kills me every time.”
“hm?” you let out, watching him toy with you.
“never enough though, is it? need me to do it for you.”
you nodded at that, albeit slightly desperately as you felt your mouth salivate. his hands started to toy with you harder, pushing his hands against your skin as a means to brand you. you could feel it, his silent, invisible mark - it was tattooed onto your very soul, something you were beginning to wear with pride.
“how much..do you watch?” you asked through a breathy moan, as you felt his body shift.
one arm slipped down to your waist, continuing the grinding with ease whilst one hand remained on your boob, pulling, cupping. his mouth dropped to your shoulder, planting kisses on bare skin before sinking his teeth slowly into a bite, marking you physically.
“mm..” he grunted, feeling pleasure up and down his body as all of his blood rushed to his cock, forcing it to strain uncomfortably against his sweats. “every night, i like watching you play with your cunt. your fingers are so small though, never quite hits where you need it, right?”
his words had your brain swimming as you let out a loud moan, fingernails digging into skin. he was spewing filth into your ears, feeding that dirty disease inside of your brain, fostering it. nurturing it.
you shook your head in agreement at his words, only getting wetter and wetter with each passing minute.
the thought of him watching you every night as your fingers plunged in and out of yourself, your thoughts plagued with him and him alone. what he would do to you, how he would treat you, all before you had ever even exchanged a word with him. the frequency of your secret masturbation escapees only got higher and higher after the party, knowing he too was attracted to you.
it all felt like too much and not enough, causing you to turn in his hold. his hands on you dropped as you slid, moving your legs so you were now straddling him, face to face, his eyes finally meeting yours.
you didn’t want to wait, not when he had just shown you the most romantic thing you had ever seen, whispered heartfelt secrets and touched you intimately - enough was enough. you had played the long game, he even longer, and it was time for something to give before your brain shut down completely.
and so, you grabbed jungkook by the face, before pressing your lips against his.
the kiss was unlike anything you had ever experienced, or expected. at first, you took charge, as shock filtered through every running vein of jungkook’s body, his brain unable to compute his reality. that only lasted a few seconds, until he sat up properly, grabbing you with haste and pushing you against his desk, kissing you back with a reverence.
it was neither soft nor gentle, but rather everything you needed it to be.
you tugged him closer as he too did the same, your mouths moving in unison, bodies grinding, using one another. you couldn’t keep your hands off of him and he didn’t bother even trying to fight it, yanking your jumper and shirt off of you completely now, letting it fall somewhere onto the ground, the cool air hitting your skin. you were left in your skirt and underwear, but you watched as he yanked your bra off as though it was a nuisance, finally freeing you completely.
only then did he part from your lips, lowering his head to properly ravish your breasts.
he couldn’t help the loud groan as he bit against your nipples, sucking on them to soothe, only to do it all again. fuck, you were so sweet, even the taste of your skin was enough to have his mind race. he couldn’t bring himself to decide what to do, going between one breast in his pith, to kissing you once more, passionately pushing you further into the desk until it was beginning to bite, only to return to your other breast.
purpled hickeys were beginning to form all over you as he created a constellation, a physical declaration of his feelings for you, a masterpiece made entirely of you and him.
“please.” you begged him, grinding harsher and harsher.
it wasn’t enough. the pleasure would catch, only to be subdued, causing you to faster and faster and yet it wasn’t enough stimulation to get you even close to orgasming for him. he was genuinely breathless at the sight of you, grabbing your hips and lifting you immediately.
he led you to his bed, dropping you in a far gentler manner you were expecting - you, however, grabbed him by his t-shirt and tugged him down before pushing it off of him.
your breath caught as he watched your expression, your shaking hands tracing the tattoos on his arm, the chest and shoulder piece that felt fresh, you fingers trailing over him hungrily. you remembered seeing him like this for the first time at the pool party, how undone you had been at the sight as though it was beyond your wildest imagination - now here you were, underneath him, ready to be ruined.
“look at me.” he panted, nose pushing against yours to get your eyes on him. you obliged. your gazes met, heavy and heated, hands still running over him. “after this..there’s no going back.”
“i know.” you whispered, nodding, knowing the implications of what was to come.
“you’re mine. publicly. visibly. everyone will know.” he fought the burger to capture your lips as he watched you exhale so sweetly, as though what we was saying was music to your ears. “need you to think baby. is that what you want? honestly?”
at that, you pulled him down once more, your lips capturing his in surprise for the second time that day. he melted against yours as your lips moved softer than ever, a gentle but knowing kiss shared between you.
you pulled away slowly. “you’re all i want. i don’t wanna hide how i feel anymore.”
jungkook closed his eyes, still hovering over you as he let out a shaking breath, chest visibly shuddering at your words. god, you were like his personal brand of drug - he could feel you in his blood stream, infusing.
seeing the effect on him had your eyes almost watering, but the need in your stomach was so much bigger. so much harsher.
and so, you tugged at his joggers, as a means to get his attention once more, to which you succeeded as he immediately caught your jaw with his mouth, instead leaning down to remove your skirt immediately. you were left in nothing more than your utterly soaked panties, your legs wide and spread, unable to look away from him.
he let out a loud groan as he parted from your arms, not with resistance of course as your nails dragged against his biceps. he moved down, until he was sat on his knees between your legs, grabbing your thighs and yanking you down the bed with his hold.
you squealed at the sudden movement, only to squeak again when you suddenly felt his nose push against your sensitive clit, all through your clothed cunt. your chest began to rise and fall at the sight of him doing the one thing you had dreamt so regularly of, the way he was openly breathing you in.
god, it was so messed up. he was freaked out beyond belief but he didn’t give a fuck, breathing in his favourite scent. “you know how many panties i’ve stolen from your hamper just to be able to smell this? fuck.”
his words had you flushed from your cheeks to your toes.
“d-don’t say that!”
his eyes met yours.
“used to wrap them around my cock thinking of you, baby.” he practically cooed at you, as he planted pepper kisses to your clit, before finally pushing the material to one side.
you couldn’t even let his words sink into your brain as he finally launched. his mouth attacked your weeping pussy as though you owed him something, and a part of you acknowledged it - he had been sniffing your panties, wrapping them around his cock, pumping in your bed to the thought of you and your scent but now? actually tasting you? he thought he was going to die.
the moans you were letting out echoed onto the walls, and jungkook smirked, knowing they were thin as paper. his friends all lived on either side of him, all in shared apartments whilst he lived alone. though they were not privy to the extent of his perversion, they were well versed in the knowledge of you and his utter devotion. they knew he’d never bring any other woman other than you into his home.
he continued his attack. sucking on your clit to begin with, tracing letters, humming, teeth slightly grazing which had you jolting out of pure stimulation before he pinned you back onto the bed. your hands rushed into his air, desperate for a semblance of comfort that only he could provide.
it took you a full minute to realise what he was spelling out on your poor pussy.
he was telling you he loved you, with v’s and o’s and i’s all curated to bring you closer and closer to cumming on his tongue, all whilst a finger began to prod at your entrance. within seconds, he inserted, letting it go as deep as you could take it, causing you to let out a loud whine.
you were being forced still on the bed, with one hand on your stomach pinning you down, all the whilst jungkook attacked. he pumped and licked, only to insert another finger whilst you were still getting adjusted to one.
you had been with other guys, sure, all before jungkook was even a thing in your mind. none were very good with their hands, or anything for that matter, and so you had come to terms with the fact sex would always be boring for you.
having him inbetween your legs, pleasuring you, all whilst he rutted into the bed himself, moaning between your legs as though he could feel the pleasure in your stomach - it was beyond anything you could conjure.
“fuck, you’re so tight. gotta loosen you up, baby, or you won’t be able to take my cock.” he hissed against you, curling his fingers inside.
you jolted again, legs restless as your thighs clamped around his head, all but suffocating him. not that he gave a fuck - he would happily die right here if given the chance.
“jungkook! i-i..” you could barely speak.
your hips bucked into his mouth after he sucked particularly harshly, causing a squeal to escape you before you pulled at his hair a little too roughly. he groaned loudly at the shot of pain, liking it more than he expected. the feeling of pain by your hands turned him on beyond belief.
he could feel you clenching, tightening around his fingers. could feel the pulsations straight to his cock which was practically weaping, begging for your attention but he needed to be patient. he was confessing his love to you against your sweet core, tasting you as if you were the only meal he’d ever be granted.
you realised very quickly that jeon jungkook was the definition of a fucking munch.
he was lost between your legs, hissing the dirtiest things you’d ever heard, about how you were made to take his tongue, how you needed to loosen up or else he’d have to fuck you open, something about how good it felt to be suffocated by your thighs. your brain was malfunctioning officially as you sunk deeper and deeper into the bed.
“close..” you managed to choke out, though he could hardly hear you, blood rushing to his head as he continued his actions, tongue laying flat to lap you up as much as possible.
you didn’t last much longer, his fingers curling into that spongy part inside of you that had you cumming, your back arching harshly, your hands pulling at his hair as you squealed loudly enough for the entire apartment complex to hear.
jungkook fucked you through it, large digits chasing the remnants of your high as he lapped up your slick, grunting about “how sweet you tasted when you cum.”
by the time your orgasm died down, jungkook had to be forcibly removed from between your thighs as you patted and pushed until he finally pulled back. his mouth was a mess, but it was his eyes that unnerved you - they looked entirely black, as though what he had just experienced was enough to take him to an early grave.
unfortunately for him, you hadn’t even had a chance to start.
your eyes fell to the large tent now in his sweats, the wet patch that had angrily formed. you could have cum again just from the sight of it, a measly sigh escaping you as you sat up on your elbows, hand darting out to message it firmly.
his jaw dropped lightly as you both kept eye contact, watching the way your hooded eyes only got drowsier and drowsier, falling into cockdrunk territory without even having it inside of you. it didn’t take long nor much before your positions were switched, with him now sat up, and you inbetween his legs, pulling down his sweats as though they were personally offending you.
you watched his cock spring up, slapping your cheek as it rested heavy on your face, a sight jungkook swore he could never forget even if he wanted to. his sweet girl.. to think he had once thought you were entirely innocent, and not at all privy to the perversion that plagued him so fully. if only he had known then that you too were a proud victim of it - he would have fucked you sooner.
he watched as your hands immediately took a hold of him, pumping up and down slowly, your eyes meeting his and refusing to look away.
“i won’t last.” he whispered down at you, to which you offered him a sly, coy smile. “just want a taste, kookie..you won’t deny me, right?”
fuck.
a girl like you needed your throat fucked.
instead of responding, he simply brushed your hair out of your face just as your tongue darted out, licking a large stripe up his tip. he was bigger than any guy you’d been with, and so much thicker, needing both hands just to wrap around him. you knew a cock like this would ruin you for life - no one would ever compare again, not when it was so pretty.
you watched as he shuddered, your tongue circulating his slit before tracing the vein down his cock, giggling lightly as you felt his hands in your hair tighten.
“don’t fucking tease.” he hissed at you, cheeks flushed red.
you obliged, though the cheeky smile on your lips, alongside your leaking cunt, proved you were up to no good.
you wrapped your mouth around his tip entirely, lips stretching wide as you began to bob your head immediately, pumping the rest of his cock that you couldn’t reach with both hands. he threw his head back in pleasure, grunting loudly as he returned to watch you.
neither of you could look away as you took more and more of him down your throat, until you began to gag too harshly, releasing him for a moment only to return to your actions. you could feel spit dribbling down the sides of your mouth, continuing to gag, continuing to pump, chasing more and more.
jungkook needed to stop you. he wanted his cum inside you only, knowing it would be such a waste if it sat inside of your stomach instead of your womb but fuck. you were a minx. just the way you bobbed your head so eagerly, as though this was all you’d ever wanted - how could he deny his sweet girl?
and so, with both hands on your head, jungkook began to push it down.
he watched you whimper, forced to take more of him down your throat, but he was uncaring, secretly loving the way you desperately scrambled to accommodate him. he began to thrust lightly, your eyes rolling to the back of your head as you felt him use you in the exact way you would often daydream about.
he released you for a moment, watching you pull off of his cock with a choke, coughing for air for a few seconds. he pulled up your chin once it subsided, pulling you in close until your lips connected once more. you could both taste each an other on your tongues, a moan leaving you at the thought.
“can’t wait any longer, baby.” he huffed, grabbing one of his pillows and situating it under your head comfortably.
your heart sang as you watched him prioritise your comfort before grabbing another pillow, placing it directly under your hips, your pussy now elevated for him to fuck exactly the way he wanted. your legs were still shaking, your throat sore from the way it had just been toyed with and yet there was nothing more than you wanted than him.
“no condoms.” you immediately said, as he began inching towards you.
jungkook wanted to laugh. he had every fucking intention of cumming inside of you, you knew that. he knew that. you were the cutest thing he had ever seen, asserting your wants just the way he wanted you to - despite his selfless nature when it came to you, he was a man with needs. he wanted you round and plump.
“no condoms.” he repeated, watching the way your eyelashes fluttered up at him before he pressed another kiss to your lips, passionate.
your tongues lapped at one another, all whilst he began to rest his cock against your core, moving, pressing into you so you’d feel every inch of what was about to penetrate you. he loved the way you moaned into his mouth, allowing for him to swallow every noise as though it was his favourite song.
as he pulled away, a thin string of saliva connected you both, a lidded look on his features.
he sat up from his position, grabbing onto your legs once more, pulling you slightly closer before continuing to rub his cock against you, beginning to push the tip in.
your eyes widened, a gasp loudly tearing into the space once more as you felt him push, push, push. his cock was breaking you in real time as he inserted inch after inch.
you couldn’t breathe.
this was the last barrier separating you, the one, final thing to make your relationship whole and now he was fully inside of you. you could feel him deep, your breath caught as your arms wrapped around his neck, all whilst he pulled himself down so his own arms were at either side of your head.
he could see it was too much, could see it in the way your eyes kept opening and shutting, your chest rising and falling, your legs parting and closing. he wanted to have you like this always, so sweet - his angel girl. god, he’d give you the world now that you were his, all soaked and clenching on his cock like he knew you would be.
he began to thrust slowly, whilst you let out gasps, whines, hums of both pleasure and pain. for every ounce of ache, you felt thrill tenfold as he made you keep your eye contact, gaze locked entirely on him.
“feel that, baby?” he cooed gently, so loving, so sweet. “you can never get rid of me, now. not even if you try.”
in response, you clenched around him hard. he choked.
“you can’t leave me either.” you whimpered up at him, his forehead coming down to connect with your own. “not allowed.”
“leave you? i’d sooner die.” he hissed immediately, as though the notion drove him insane to think about. at that, you felt your bottom lip quiver slightly. “my weepy baby.”
at that, his thrusts finally began to quicken.
they picked up in pace and pressure, as his thrusts now landed harder. faster. meaner.
the sound of skin slapping against skin echoed off of the walls as your name was chanted on his breath, all whilst you clawed at his cheeks, neck and shoulders. he could feel the pain come in waves as the scratches you left on him began to bleed lightly, not that he gave a fuck - he wanted you to mark him in every single way.
by the time he was pounding into you, you were openly crying up at him.
you were so overwhelmed, tears pooling on either side of the pillow as you begged him not to stop, desperate to keep him inside of you for as long as he could, your hips coming up to meet his thrusts. it just felt so good, so whole, nothing had ever felt so right before.
was this a taste of heaven, jungkook thought, as he leaned down to kiss you through your blabbering, all whilst you tried to keep your sobs at bay. god, you were driving him insane. to know you were crying out of pleasure was akin to his wildest dreams, his eyes shutting tight to ward off any thoughts of cumming too soon.
“my girl, my girl, my girl.” he chanted down at you, heaving lightly. “fuck..don’t know what to do with you. need to give you the world but it’s not enough.”
“just want you. you’re my world.” you whimpered at him, all whilst clenching down hard causing him to hiss loudly.
your words were fucking him up. his head swarmed with flashing images of you knocked up, thick diamond on your left hand, cute little dress stretched over your stomach as he cooked for you. a house on a suburban street, with a nice garden and a white picket fence. fuck. he had to give you it all.
“open.” he growled down at you, to which you opened your mouth immediately.
he spat inside, watching the way you swallowed almost instantly, tongue lolling out of your mouth to show him.
“good fucking girl. my stupid baby doesn’t wanna think no more, huh? just needs me to tell her what to do.”
“mhm.” you confirmed, pussy throbbing at his condescending tone. “that's how i want you, all fucked out. need to get you pregnant soon, can’t have this pussy empty ever again.”
at that, you felt your eyes roll to the back of your skull as your legs began to shake. he knew you were close, but he wasn’t done with you yet.
you let out the loudest whine of the night, protesting as he slipped out of you, cock soaked from your juices as it slapped against his stomach. he laughed lightly at how bratty you sounded, the pout on your lips paired with the tears streaming down your face enough to drive any man fucking wild.
he pulled you up by your arms, almost harshly as he rested against the bed frame, pillow behind his back to support you both before pulling you into his lap. you felt his cock prod at your entrance before he all but pushed you down onto it, forcing you to take every inch once more.
the moan you let out would forever remain imprinted onto his memory as he watched your face squeeze in pleasure, feeling him so much deeper in this position. he pulled your legs on either side of him, so you were properly sat, all whilst he cradled you to him.
he began picking you up and dropping you, both of you hissing at the feel of you so much tighter this way, if that was ever possible. he was practically using you, with the way he was manhandling your body, your arms wrapped around his neck as you let him do whatever he wanted in the name of pleasure.
“don’t want t..this to stop..fuck, kookie.” you moaned, watching the way his skin bled lightly from your earlier attacks.
“won’t stop baby.” he let out a breathy exhale. “gonna do this to you every chance i can. fuck you, watch you when you’re not with me, gonna break in like i always do. hm, you want that? you want kookie to stalk you, still?”
“yes.” you sobbed at him, nodding desperately as you began matching his thrusts, it bordering on masochism with the way he was pounding into you. “please don’t stop.”
“sick fucking girl. makes you wet thinking about me stalking you, huh?” he hissed, fingers rubbing at your clit for you, to which you continued to nod. “that’s why we’re a match, baby. that fucked up part of your brain is just like mine, it makes my cock hard too.”
“don’t want anything to change.” you whimpered through a sob, watching the way his eyes rolled back. “don’t worry..fuck..just like that. gonna make sure you feel it this time, hm? make sure you see me everywhere.”
the pleasure, the thought, the promise. it was too much and not enough.
“promise, kookie? promise me.” you begged through your tears, watching as they streamed down your face, falling between you and straight onto where your bodies met, causing jungkook to fuck them back into you. “promise baby. gonna stalk you until you beg me to stop and even then, s’not your choice, huh?”
his words ripped you over the edge as your breathing stopped, cockdrunk and orgasming on his too fat cock. your body convulsed, his arms caging you in as he fucked into you, riding out your orgasm in a way that had your feet wrapping around him tightly.
jungkook watched your eyes shut tight before you squeaked from overstimulation, as he too chased his high, following you closely as he felt his orgasm wash over him. he grabbed onto your body, clutching you tight as he came and came and came and came.
he captured your lips with his own as he rode out his high, feeling you quiver with the way you milked him for every last drop. your mouths moved in unison, his tongue lapping at yours once more as you twitched around him, collapsing in his arms from exhaustion after.
you both panted, both unable to comprehend what had just happened, and yet neither of you made any effort to move. he pulled you closer, still inside, holding you tight, kissing every inch of your face, whispering sweet nothings.
“so good to me.” he whispered down at you right as you closed your eyes, exhausting taking a hold of you as it slowly seeped into your bloodstream.
—
the cafe off campus was home to you by now, and home to the relationship you had fostered with jungkook. this was where he had first seen you, where he had first tasted the sweet, familiar sensation of obsession.
now, he came here with you, hand in hand as he ordered your favourite drink and a cookie, all whilst you rested your head on his bicep as though you were finally comfortable. people around you would stare, half in confusion and other curiosity at the sight of the most popular girl on campus so smitten with her nerdy, know it all boyfriend who was known for his dry attitude. it seemed it was only you who he bothered with, and that confused everyone else even more.
what did you see in him, they wondered. was he rich? did he have a trust fund? sure he was attractive, with his large frame and tattoos, piercings glinting in the sun but you were on a whole other league. they simply couldn’t work it out.
such fools, you often thought, scoffing at the way they’d think. they had no idea what jungkook was to you, and what he represented. a physical manifestation of every deep, twisted desire in your darkened mind - wholly accepting, entirely loving. he was the love of your life, and you. oh, you were the very epitome of life itself for him.
he liked when you’d both sit in the corner, where he’d sit across from you, laughing quietly at whatever you’d tell him as though anything you said was intensely humorous. your cheeks would flush pink as he would take his time in complimenting you, from your hair to your outfit, all the way down to the cute ballet flats that adorned your feet.
“c’mon, finish your cookie.” he’d remind, voice soft despite his darkened demeanour, only for his gentle tone to drop whenever someone would ask him a question, or even look his way.
the only other person he was even remotely as nice to was his own personal circle, and of course, yejin, who you adored more than words. she’d often sit with you both, just so you could both talk and gossip as you’d often do, whilst jungkook merely sat and admired you.
sometimes he would tell you he couldn’t join you just to have an excuse to stalk you. the thought had your panties damp in a second, as you would peer from the corner of your eye, noticing a shadow, a cap and mask, all hidden away in the corners of the room. fuck.
now you were able to spot it, it made the game so much more thrilling.
you were at his home every chance you could get, or him at yours, but on the off chance you would fall asleep on your own, you’d be sure to find the most risqué underwear you could find, all so you could perch on your bed at an angle you knew he’d enjoy. from waking up in the middle of the night to touch yourself to openly addressing him, you took full advantage of his voyeuristic tendencies.
sometimes, you’d wake up to find him in bed next to you, bulge nestled right against where you needed him most, a reminder that he was able to break in when you least expected. of course, that also meant you were constantly undergoing a shortage of panties as he’d steal them.
that didn’t mean you had stopped, however, as you too felt your mind fall deeper into madness.
he had been paired with another girl for a physics project, to which they had shared contact information to divide tasks. innocent enough for most but it had you falling into a deep, dark jealousy, as you hacked into his phone with every chance you got, reading his messages, nibbling away at your lip despite knowing he knew what you were doing.
considering the messages so far consisted of “i’ve done section 2.” and “please do section 4 before monday.” you knew you had nothing to stress about, but you couldn’t reason with someone with a parasitic brain. even after the project was over, you found yourself looking through his phone almost excitedly, it bringing you a sense of entertainment and joy.
you’d leave little snippets of yourself there to remind him you were always watching him - ranging from little i love you’s in his note apps to full on nudes of your body in his photo album, to which he’d go feral for once he’d find them.
neither of you were healthy. neither of you were normal and yet you were happy beyond belief, living a life you were sure that no one else could have given you.
it wasn’t until yejin started hanging around with jungkook’s friends, all of you interacting, that you realised his tendencies were beginning to rub off on his own circle - his oldest friend, seokjin, staring deeply at her with a look of pure and unyielding devotion. she, of course, being a smart girl completely fed into it, making him her little boy toy almost immediately.
“nothing better than an obsessive man.” she had hummed to you with a wink, watching him scramble to go get her the drink she had asked for.
if only she knew how deeply you agreed with the sentiment.
“you’re sick.” you murmured at her with a coy grin, though there were no bite to your words.
yejin only grinned with a small giggle, leaning back into her chair as she crossed her legs, entirely unbothered. “hm, and you’re not?”
you didn’t answer. you didn’t need to when your grin gave you away.
the scrape of the chair beside you was familiar now, and expected, as jungkook hand found its usual place on the back of your neck, thumb pressing gently to ground the both of you to one another.
his drink sat down beside yours, your typical matcha cookie following.
this was routine at its finest.
“eat.” he simply muttered, a small kiss placed to your head before he slid into the seat next to you, as opposed to opposite you this time.
you leaned into him without thinking, breathing in his scent almost hungrily before lifting your drink to your lips, all the whilst curling into him instinctively. yejin’s eyes flickered between the two of you, a sense of candied understanding settling behind them before she let out a hum of amusement.
“i’m gonna go steal jin’s wallet. i wanna go shopping.” she hummed, already standing.
“it’s not stealing if he’d thank you for doing it.” you replied through a glance, causing her to tilt her head before nodding.
“exactly! he has to carry the bags too..”
she disappeared, walking over to the counter where he was collecting her drink, eyes already trained on her as she slid her hand into his back pocket, batting her eyelashes up at him. you watched his jaw slack, completely enamoured before nodding immediately, guiding her to the door without even bothering to spare anyone else a glance. the sight had you giggling.
you didn’t notice the shift beside you until it impacted you directly.
his hand moved from the back of your neck to your jaw, pushing it towards him gently so that you were facing him properly. his sweet girl, you looked so pretty today, he thought. what, with your hair all curled.
“you didn’t sleep.”
not a question, but rather an observation.
you blinked at him, a little dazed, before shaking your head slowly. “i did..”
this thumb pressed under your eye, amused by your lies. “no you didn’t.”
you huffed, your bratty nature to the surface now you were completely comfortable with him. “okay, fine. woke up early, that’s all.”
“what time?”
“…three.”
he watched you for a second longer than necessary, something ticking behind his eyes, before he leaned back slightly in his chair. he was observing you openly as he often did, with his attention on your gaze, momentarily dropping to your lips that he wanted nothing more than to defile, before returning up.
“next time call me, baby.”
you nibbled at your lips at his sweet response. “you were sleeping, didn’t wanna disturb you.”
“call me.” he responded again, firmer this time, as though he’d hear nothing else on the matter.
your stomach fluttered.
a beat of silence filled the air as he pulled you in close once more, pressing his lips to your forehead, looking down at the way you sipped on your drink, humming quietly about how yummy it tasted. he found you so endearing - loving how anytime he’d bring you here, you’d do the same thing, always making the cutest of noises whilst telling him he needed to try how good your drink was.
he reached for your cookie, breaking off a piece before holding it to your lips. you immediately opened up your mouth, taking a bite, cheekily swiping your tongue on his finger before innocently batting your lashes up at him.
you knew he’d get you back later.
you chewed slowly whilst he breathed in your scent, lips grazing against your neck, jaw, nose and head. it wasn’t until you had completely finished your cookie that he pulled back slowly.
“i’ve been thinking about us.” he confessed, softly.
that got your attention. you stilled slightly, as you peered up at his face, trying to determine what he meant.
“about what we’re doing after this.”
you stilled. not visibly, or in a way anyone with an untrained eye would notice, but in a way that only a man like jungkook could be well versed in. he watched you like a hawk.
“after what?” you asked almost shakily. he brushed your lip with his thumb. “after graduation, after everything.”
you watched him more carefully now.
“i’ve had multiple job offers now, different places…different cities.” he murmured gently down at you, only to watch the way your face fell slightly.
it was like he could see your heart straining.
“okay..” you whispered softly, unsure of what to say.
“we need to talk about where we’re going, baby. not taking anything until you decide where you want us to be.”
you blinked.
“what?”
“i’ll go wherever you wanna go. or you can come with me, i don’t really mind.”
your eyebrows knitted together. you weren’t confused, no - you were catching up. it was like a decision had been made for you, and you were finally privy to it.
“kookie..”
“i’m serious, y/n.” his voice remained the same tone, neither raising nor getting too excited. it was like this was fact. “i’m not building anything without you in it.”
your throat felt tight all of a sudden as you swallowed, your chest beating out of your chest at the casual sweetness he displayed for you and you alone. you felt so loved. always so, so loved.
“i don’t even know where i wanna work after this.” you confessed, voice small.
“that’s okay. we’ll figure it out.” he assured.
no pressure, no impatience. just a gentle assurance that whatever you picked, whenever you did, it would be done with him by your side.
“and if it’s somewhere shit?” you weakly asked, attempting some kind of humour despite your heart beating out of your chest.
he huffed out of amusement, easing your shoulders. “then it’ll be shit. doesn’t matter to me.”
you couldn’t stop staring at him, looking deeper and deeper into dark chocolate orbs where you could see nothing but yourself reflected both in and out. you tried to find the exaggeration, or the joke, but you came up short each time.
there wasn’t one.
“i’ll get us a good place. been saving for us.” he murmured almost absentmindedly. “somewhere big enough for you.”
your heart lurched hard.
“and then?” you asked, voice so soft it sat barely above a whisper.
the side of his lips quirked up.
“then, i marry you.”
he said it as though it was fact, as opposed to a wish for the future. you couldn’t breathe. you couldn’t breathe. you couldn’t breathe.
“..and..then?” you choked out, with large eyes.
he grinned, gentle, soft.
“then…no more birth control.” his voice melodic, soft, as though it wasn’t a warning to come. “then, we start our family together.”
jungkook’s hand slid under the table to intertwine with yours before he pulled it up to his lips, watching the way your eyes quickly filled with unshed tears ready to implode at any minute. he huffed out another breath of amusement at the sight of his girl, always so sweet and always so so teary.
the constant tug of war between you to get closer and closer all made sense in that moment.
jungkook wasn’t just your person, he was the only route home. he was everything and more, and you were his sole purpose.
you were both inevitable.
———
i love my creepy little stalkers so much, they’re such weird freaks
my silly babies, i loved writing this one, sorry it was so long omg, 25k words is crazy even for me but i hope you guys enjoy and love it so much!!
if you enjoyed this fic and want to support me in paying my ugly london rent, i have my kofi here ❤️
While your older brother’s away overseas on business, he asks his bodyguard, who’s also his best friend, to take care of you on his behalf. All his bodyguard knows how to do is fight and protect, while you know absolutely nothing of that nature. And during the months he spends lurking in your shadow, he’ll come to learn that he was never just reporting for duty.
( 𝓑𝐎𝐍𝐔𝐒 𝐌𝐎𝐓𝐈𝐕𝐀𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍 ) 𝗷𝘂𝗻𝗴𝗸𝗼𝗼𝗸 𝘅 𝗳𝗲𝗺!𝗿𝗲𝗮𝗱𝗲𝗿. ˖Ი𐑼⋆ sfw +++ suggestive. you try to trick your boyfriend into restarting his entire push-up routine for a few extra kisses, but he decides to ditch the workout entirely to pin you to the floor and claim his reward.
it started because your boyfriend was complaining about needing to get a quick workout in before the shower. and you, being the incredibly helpful girlfriend you are, casually suggested you could provide some bonus motivation.
now, you were lying flat on your back on his plush rug, and JUNGKOOK was positioned directly over you in a perfect plank. but the real challenge wasn't the workout; it was the rule you’d established. every single rep required him to drop all the way down and steal a kiss from your lips before pushing himself back up.
"twenty," you murmured, his lips pressing firmly against yours before he pushed back up.
"twenty-one," another sweet, but quick kiss landed on your mouth.
jungkook was a beast by the time you reached ninety. it was a very hard achievement, while holding himself back from completely ravaging you was taking a toll. his breathing was hot against your cheeks. his veins were popping beautifully along his forearms, and you could see the defined stretch of his chest muscles under his tight tee every time he lowered himself down. you had been leisurely gazing up and down at him the entire time, thoroughly enjoying the view.
"ninety-eight," your voice a soft hum as his lips pressed firmly against yours, before he pushed up again. his biceps were trembling slightly, but nothing he couldn't handle.
"ninety-nine," his mouth lingering a little longer this time, pulling back and holding himself in a plank as he waited for the final count. instead, you sighed, your bottom lip jutting out into a fake pout. you looked up at him through your lashes, tilting your head innocently. "hmm... seems like we're one short of a hundred."
jungkook raised a pierced brow in confusion, his chest rising and falling heavily. gazing down at you, and he did not like that look. it meant trouble.
"what do you mean one short?" he panted, completely wrecked from the exertion. "i just did ninety-nine. the next one is a hundred."
you hummed, tracing a finger up the ink on his forearm in a very teasing manner, "you know the rules, baby. if it's not a full set, you have to start all over."
jungkook chuckled, his head dropping for a second before he looked back at you. the audacity of his pretty girlfriend doing this to him. he was exhausted, and you were sitting there playing mind games.
"oh, really?" he whispered, a playful smirk tugging at the corner of his lips.
suddenly, his arms gave out on purpose. he didn't drop hard, but he let his entire heavy and warm body collapse directly on top of you, burying his face in the crook of your neck. he groaned loudly, pinning you to the rug with his full weight, his nose nuzzling into your skin.
"kook! you're heavy, get off!" you giggled, tossing your head back as his fluffy hair tickled your chin.
"never," his hands coming down to grip your waist tightly to prevent you from squirming so much. "you want a restart, baby? fine. but we're doing it my way."
propping himself up on his elbows to look down at you, trapping you beneath him, because you are not running away until his motivation to do better goes away, or if he decides he is done playing games.
"rep number one," and before you could even count yourself, his lips crashed into yours, completely abandoning the workout for something much, much better.
your boyfriend is possessive to the point of obsession. and when jungkook feels like he’s losing you — he doesn’t know how to be gentle.
𝗽𝗮𝗶𝗿𝗶𝗻𝗴: jungkook x fem!reader
𝘁𝗿𝗼𝗽𝗲𝘀 / 𝗮𝘂: established relationship, possessive boyfriend, extreme jealousy, angry sex, obsession, argument to sex.
𝘄𝗮𝗿𝗻𝗶𝗻𝗴𝘀: toxic and possessive behavior, jealous rage, um lowk he's just an asshole lol sorry, smut: rough kissing, oral — a lot of prolonged .. pussy eating 😺 (seriously, like half of the smut is just him on his knees eating her out over and over), spitting, ass slapping, wall sex, breast play, unprotected sex, rough sex, overwhelming orgasm, degradation, obsessive language. 𝗽𝗹𝗲𝗮𝘀𝗲 𝗻𝗼𝘁𝗲 𝘁𝗵𝗮𝘁 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝘄𝗮𝗿𝗻𝗶𝗻𝗴𝘀 𝗮𝗽𝗽𝗹𝘆 𝘁𝗼 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗳𝘂𝗹𝗹 𝗼𝗻𝗲-𝘀𝗵𝗼𝘁 𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝗻𝗼𝘁 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝘁𝗲𝗮𝘀𝗲𝗿.
𝘁𝗲𝗮𝘀𝗲𝗿 / 𝘀𝗻𝗶𝗽𝗽𝗲𝘁 𝘄𝗼𝗿𝗱 𝗰𝗼𝘂𝗻𝘁: 1.3k
𝘁𝗼𝘁𝗮𝗹 𝘄𝗼𝗿𝗱 𝗰𝗼𝘂𝗻𝘁: 6.1k
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The front door slammed so hard that it felt like even the frames on the walls shuddered. You flinched before you even heard the footsteps.
Heavy thuds. Coming straight for the bedroom.
The door flew open and Jungkook filled the frame like a storm given a body. His broad chest rose and fell in angry pulls. Jaw locked. Dark eyes burning with something that looked too close to obsession to be safe. The veins in his forearms stood out stark against the rolled sleeves of his shirt, and the loosened tie around his neck looked like it had already lost a fight.
“Don’t. Move.”
You stood there.. near your bed. Confused.
He stepped inside and locked the door behind him without looking away from you. The click of the bolt felt final. Then he reached up, ripped the tie free in one hard yank, and threw it aside like it had offended him.
“You thought I wouldn’t find out, princess?”
You blinked, heart already climbing into your throat. “What are you talking about?”
He closed the distance in three long strides. You backed up on instinct until your shoulders hit the wall. His hands slammed against the surface on either side of your head, caging you in. The heat rolling off him was almost physical.
“Don’t play dumb with me.” His voice dropped even lower, rough and shaking with barely leashed rage. His face hovered inches from yours, eyes wild, searching every tiny shift in your expression. “That guy.”
“Huh? What guy?”
“The one who sent you flowers.” His free hand came up and caught your chin, firm enough to force your gaze up to his. Thumb pressing into the soft underside of your jaw. “I saw the note. The fucking love note.” His breath brushed your mouth as he leaned closer. “And you never said a word.”
The silence between you stretched taut.
“You didn’t tell me,” he repeated, quieter now, but somehow worse. The anger hadn’t left — it had simply folded itself into something darker, and more personal. “You let some other man send you flowers and you kept it from me.”
His grip on your chin tightened just enough to make your pulse jump. Those dark eyes stayed locked on yours, burning with the kind of possession that didn’t know how to be gentle.
You exhaled sharply, trying to twist your face free. “It’s not a big deal, Jungkook. I don’t even like him.”
His laugh was short and humorless. “Not a big deal?” He released your chin only to plant both hands on the wall again. “You’re keeping secrets from me, ___. That’s the big deal.”
“I’m not keeping secrets—”
“You didn’t tell me!” His voice rose, sharp enough to cut. “Some guy sends you roses with a fucking love note and you decide I don’t need to know? What else are you hiding? How many other men think they can touch what’s mine?”
You shoved at his chest, but he didn’t budge. “Don’t start with that bullshit. He’s a friend. He was being nice after I helped him with a project. That’s it. You’re acting like I cheated on you.”
“You let another man write that he wants you.” Jungkook’s eyes flashed. “And you kept the note. I fucking read it. You think I wouldn't find out? You left it in the car and Ive read everything. Even the part where he wrote that he gave you flowers. And you walked around me all this time — knowing some other guy was thinking about you and you said nothing to me, ___. That’s you deciding I don’t get to know what’s happening in your life.”
“Because I knew you’d do this!” Your voice cracked as you raised it to match his. “I knew you’d explode and turn it into some huge betrayal. I didn’t tell you because it’s not worth the fight. I don’t want him. I don’t think about him. I come home to you every night, you stupid fuck!”
He leaned in closer, breath hot against your cheek. “Don’t lie to me now, princess..”
You groan.
“You’re fucking impossible when you get like this.” You glared up at him, chest heaving. “You see one thing and suddenly I’m some unfaithful liar. You’re so fucking insecure you can’t even handle a friend being kind without turning it into a crime.”
The second the word left your mouth, the air in the room changed.
Jungkook went completely still. The rage didn’t disappear — it turned.., colder, more dangerous. His jaw flexed once. And when he spoke again, his voice was low and deadly quiet.
“Insecure?”
He repeated the word like he was tasting it. Like he was deciding exactly how much damage it deserved.
“Say that again, ___.”
You let out a long, shaky sigh, the fight suddenly feeling too heavy to carry. Your shoulders dropped as you tried to soften your voice. “Jungkook… I’m sorry, okay? I shouldn’t have said that. I was just—”
“No.”
The word landed like a slammed door. He didn’t raise his voice, but the quiet in it was worse. His hand came up again, fingers closing around your jaw with deliberate pressure, tilting your face back up so you had no choice but to look at him.
“You don’t get to call me insecure and then try to walk it back the second you see my face. You meant it, princess. So own it.”
You swallowed hard. “I didn’t mean it like that. I just—”
“You hid something from me.” His thumb pressed into the soft skin beneath your jaw, not hard enough to hurt, but firm enough to keep you still. “He wrote that he can’t stop thinking about you. And you decided I didn’t need to know. You protected it. You protected him.”
“That’s not what happened at all, Jungkook. You're—”
“Then explain it to me.” His voice stayed low, but every word was sharp. “Explain how a ‘friend’ decides it’s appropriate to send you roses and a confession.”
Your chest tightened. Heat rose in your cheeks — anger, frustration, all tangled together. “He was just being dramatic after I helped him with something. I didn’t tell you because I didn’t want a war over something that means nothing.”
He leaned in closer until his forehead almost touched yours. The heat of his body pressed against you, overwhelmingly. “It means something when another man thinks he can write those words to my girl. It means something when you decide I don’t get to know. You don’t get to decide what I’m allowed to feel about it.”
You stared at him, heart hammering, then something inside you finally snapped.
“I give up.” The words came out raw. You shoved both hands against his chest hard enough that he actually shifted back a step. “Fuck you, Jungkook. I’m done with this conversation. Actually— I’m done with you!”
You ducked under his arm and walked straight toward the door, bare feet silent on the floor, pulse roaring in your ears. You only made it halfway across the room before his voice cracked through the air.
“Where the fuck do you think you’re going?”
You didn’t stop. Your fingers closed around the lock, twisting it open with more force than necessary. Over your shoulder you threw the words like a match onto gasoline, reckless and mean and designed to cut.
“I don’t know. Maybe my friend would love to help.”
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hope you liked the snippet :) this one-shot is patreon exclusive only! you can find the full one-shot here: [ ALL MINE ] under the [ ARCHIVE ] tier where you'll also find early access posts and additional bonus exclusive content! (one-shot is also available as a single product) <3 thank u for ur support! x
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You were eighteen years old when Jimin's name showed up on your hand.
The day is fresh and clear in your memory: early December, the winds stronger than ever as they threatened to pierce through the windows of your room, hints of snowflake dancing in the air as the first snowfall augured an even sharper winter. There was a smile on your face that didn't match the unrelenting coldness of the month, and even though the night was falling and the air felt icy on the tips of your fingers, there was only warmth in your chest as you went through the pictures of your phone.
Pictures of you and Jimin drinking hot chocolate, of clumsy iceskating, of funny faces that made you laugh out loud in the quietness of your bedroom.
The feeling sparking in your chest could be considered somewhat dangerous - after all, you were just a girl that didn't have any marks on her skin, a girl whose fate was yet to be decided. Something as enigmatic as love could be a treacherous thing, too risky for someone that couldn't decide their destiny on their own.
✦ orange tulips by @kainks ☆ㅤ♡ ⏾
soulmate!au, reincarnation au | wc: 10.2k
You’d remember Jungkook with every life you lived. Only he’d never remember you, never recall how your fates were written in the stars since the beginning of time.
✦ the train of lost souls by @inktae ☆ㅤ♡
fantasy au, f2s2l | wc: 13.6k
You can choose to live, to be given a second and a last chance in life, in exchange for your memories and your previous existence. You can choose to be alive again, but it can only be an entirely new life. Everyone you've ever crossed paths with would forget your name. All the pain and the love you knew, all the ups and downs that made you hurt and made you smile - all of it, completely gone.
Or you can choose to move on, to give your life away while keeping your memories until the end of time. To step out of the world of the living and to embrace a new kind of loneliness, but with the warmth of your past always safe between your cold hands.
You are dead, but it's up to you to do something about it.
jungkook and you are soulmates. so says the matching crescent moons on both your wrists. however, things are never as easy as they seem, and you are quick to learn that falling in love with someone who does not believe in love is a one-way ticket to heartbreak.
alternatively,
"You still are, you know. Worth it." You release a shaky breath. "But I was stupid to think that I am too."
✦ cold nights & blurred lines by @awrkive ☆ㅤ♡ ⏾
fwb!au, college!au | wc: 26.6k
jungkook and you have been in a sexual relationship with each other for four months now, and it's casual for the most part. but as time passes, you can't help but feel that some of the lines suddenly got blurred in the process. is it a cliché to blur the lines with your fuck buddy? it definitely is. will you do something about it? both of your emotional constipation have a hard time saying yes.
✦ idealizations concerning real life relations by @venusiangguk ☆ㅤ ⏾
fwb au, s2l | wc: 40.9k
jungkook loves to be loved, but he doesn’t love in return.
✦ chasing butterflies by @ddaenggtan ♡ ⏾
coffee shop & college au | s2l | wc: 12.8k
you never meant to be a jock in school. the volleyball team had just needed people and you were there and then you had a knack for it. you just happened to be good at it and went with it. similar to how you saw jeon jungkook in your friend’s orientation group and thought he was absolutely radiant and just went with it. for two years. you’ve spent the entire time pining from afar, mostly because you always seem to make a fool of yourself when he’s around, but also because jungkook is part of that exclusive crowd, the ones that you never can seem to penetrate: the weebs. that is, until your friends get sick of your hopeless pining and decide to do something about it.
✦ graveyard shift by @darkestcorners ☆ㅤ
horror, yandere au, vampire au | wc: 8.3k
When you take the graveyard shift at your new job, you expect things to go rather boringly but the quiet night soon turns deadly when you realize you aren’t alone
✦ stars behind waves by @taegularities ☆ㅤ♡ ⏾
vacation/beach!au, f2l | wc: 22.7k
With a decade’s distance between Jungkook and you, your paths cross on the same island you deemed your second home years ago. And you realise once again – the ocean can never compare to the twinkle in his starry eyes.
jungkook, lucifer and king of hell, has been cast out of the crimson underworld for a reason he’s unsure of. embarking on his journey for the answer should’ve been easy, if it weren’t for you, the human that nurses his wounded body in her home, and accidentally witnesses the truth of his identity. kickstarting a hellish adventure with the devil himself, you discover lucifer is the most infuriating company ever; and jungkook finds out that maybe his answer to returning home lies within his annoying human confidant.
✦ one night stand by @buryhny ☆ㅤ♡ ⏾
pregnancy au, e2l | wc:200k
as if the unexpected twist of a one-night stand turning out to be your CEO boss wasn't surreal enough, the situation takes a more challenging turn when both of you discover that you're expecting his child.
✦ practice by @chryblossomjjk ☆ㅤ♡ ⏾
fwb au, fuckboy au, college au | wc: 32.6k
you usually spend friday nights on your own. tonight, however, your friend and campus fuckboy, jungkook, decides to pay you a visit.
✦ wife trap by @wintrbears ☆ㅤ♡ ⏾
twins au, brother in law au, f2l | wc: 79.4k
Your husband and his identical twin brother are complete opposites, but when the pair are in a horrific car accident together and the nurse asks Jungkook which twin he is, he decides to spare you the heartache of losing your beloved husband by becoming him.
✦ fight for you by @ahundredtimesover ☆ㅤ ⏾
bodyguard au | wc: 80k
Working at a private security agency has its perks. The downside? Being the personal bodyguard of spoiled, rich heiresses like you. But there are things that Jungkook didn’t expect, like rejecting you, falling for you, and realizing what he’d been missing all along
✦ to tame a god by @jeonstudios ☆ㅤㅤ♡ ⏾
supernatural au, wolf au, adventure | wc: 50.4 k
jeon jeongguk is the youngest alpha his pack has ever seen, and they all trust him with their lives. one day, a strange wolf enters his territory. they know it’s not a regular wolf, because just like their own, its eyes shine with the supernatural powers from within. but it won’t shift back to its human form to reveal its intentions.
✦ please love me by @ahundredtimesover ☆ㅤ♡ ⏾
arranged marriage au, childhood friends, ceo kids | wc: 64.3k
to symbolize your unbreakable bond that spans generations. But despite developing an affection for Jungkook growing up, he never returned it; he never seemed to like you, actually. You’re okay with the proposal, but surprise surprise, he isn’t.
✦ an abundance of luck & sprinkle of hate by @borathae ☆ㅤ♡ ⏾
ceo au, sex worker au, bdsm, s2l | wc : 172.2k
When two souls, with different reasons for why life has broken them, find together, it needs a whole lot of a luck and a little bit of fate to make them see that maybe healing together isn’t as bad as it sounds.
these fics are so, so good! absolute masterpieces. huge shoutout to every author for creating them! i love y’ll so much!!!🤍 also guys, is the format okay? lmk below what you'd prefer!
