WHEN IT ALL COMES TO AN END (pt.1)
pt. 2 section one.
pairing :: ald1 x fem!reader
includes :: angst
JUNSEO walks into the living room, shutting the door after him rather harshly. you were sat stoic, at the dining table with the candles still burning, scenting the room with lavender. you watch him lie down on the couch, and immediately get to scrolling. he didn't even notice. you try to push away any sorts of thoughts, walking slowly to him. you pat his shoulder and he jolts up from the soft cushion and looks at you. "y/n you scared the shit out of me!" it's almost 1 am and the lights in the room are dim.
"you forgot, didn't you?" junseo's face shows a split second of confusion and turns into and oh. he knits his eyebrows together and mutters, "why today out of all days?" followed by a sigh. maybe it wasn't meant for you to hear those words or maybe he said it loud enough so you could hear it on purpose.
"do you even care, jun?" he doesn't answer. the silence was deafening. you patiently waited to hear his voice. more than two minutes passed in absolute hush. he couldn't see your face but the light on one side of the room illuminated half of your face, enough to see a tear run down your cheek. you let out a quiet sigh, picked up your things and walked away. and the worst part was he didn't even follow.
⟡
JIAHAO walks next to you, his body rather stiff and unusual. your hand is linked with his as you both pass through strangers among a huge crowd at his company's event. he keeps fidgeting, looking around and stealing glances at you.
just when you have a seat for dinner, he clears his throat.
"uh y/n?" your eyes darted to him. "when are you gonna move out? i mean have you found a place to stay yet?" you have been staying at jiahao's place for time being, as you simultaneously looked for a place to stay after your graduation. the landlord didn't know you were there without rent and it was a shared space between two people, so it was a secret from him.
you raise an eyebrow at him. "i mean- my new flat mate is gonna move in soon and she needs the place empty by next week. she wouldn't like you there." she? "do you know her, hao?" his face drops hue as he says, "uh no not really, but i think her name is jiah?"
the name was oddly familiar. you told him that you would soon move out, but you kept rummaging through your memories to recall where you heard that name. the dinner was silent and as you took the last bite of your food, it struck you.
"bro why is jiah back in your dms damn! does she perhaps want you back?" leo's voice rings through your ears.
"oh."
all you did was smile through the night, his hand resting on yours but every subtle touch felt like a thorn knowing he wasn't yours anymore.
⟡
LEO was acting quite out of character for almost two weeks. staying at sangwon's place most of the time. 'work' was his excuse, but it seemed too off to be just work. you might be an overthinker but this time the gut feeling was too strong and loud.
So one day you were just on a date, which he seemed to be quite uninterested in. you both were taking a walk at the park, staring at the greens and barely talking. hands were held but he let go after a kid ran through between you both and you extended your arm. it went unnoticed and he didn't make an effort to hold it again.
A huge sigh left his lips.
"y/n, i can't go on like this."
"what's wrong?' your heart pounded against your chest so loud.
"i don't feel the same towards you anymore. it's so suffocating to be with you. it's not like i dislike you but... i just am not able to do this anymore. I tried i really did."
you were prepared for the worst but you didn't know the worst would hurt this bad. it felt like you lost everything that was at hand. everything that you loved. you had to say something but words wouldn't come out so you just stared at him.
He could sense that you were broken. he leaned forward, pressed a soft kiss on your forehead, muttered "im sorry" and all you could see was the love of your life walking away from you, disappearing into the grey path which you didn't seem to know the end of.
⟡
GEONWOO sat on the couch which was sitting right at the middle of the frat house, laughing and drinking along with his friends. he has been avoiding your calls and texts and it's been more than three days that you've seen each other. you missed him a lot and it was rare that you guys went three whole days without talking.
seeing him laughing and smiling softened your heart despite the hurt that creeped at the edges of your chest, when you learnt that he's been partying and avoiding you. you walk to the front of the couch awaiting his reaction to see you there.
instead, his lively gaze snapped to annoyance. the change of demeanor was quite evident and it stung. he grabbed your arm and guided you outside, his grip quite harsh on your skin.
"why are you here?"
"what do you mean sweets we haven't even talked in a while and i miss-"
"oh that again. you're so fucking clingy and im tired of you." tears came rushing from the back of your head to the brim of your eyes. you saw annoyance written on his face and you could hear your heart break little by little. you were sure he heard it too.
no other words were uttered. your tears that dripped down your face made his eyes roll with displeasure and he walked away from you, leaving you all alone with a broken heart and the saddest story.
⟡
SANGWON stood in front of you drenched in midnight rain, panting and tired. it looked like he had something to say. something unpleasant. it was around 2 am and you were a little shocked to see him in such a state at your front door, and the absence of words from him made you anxious.
you whispered to him that you'd get him a towel for him to dry himself, but he held you back by his palm on your wrist, shaking his head no. you raised an eyebrow in question and that's when he sighed.
"y/n i need to tell you something, it's really important and... heavy." you nod as your stomach churns because of the anxiety.
"we need to break up." need? his voice started to break as he spoke. "my mom is sick, right? we need to go to new york for her treatment. my brother has called and all the arrangements have been made. including college."
"i get it. i understand. it's fine you know i can wait for you how much ever long. all i have to do is wait right, we can do long dista-"
"y/n im not coming back." huh? "we're moving away to live with my brother. im not coming back." this wasn't even remotely close to what you wanted to hear on a friday midnight. you couldn't utter a word. sangwon murmured something which you didn't even take notice of. he stepped back, and out of your main door, shutting it gently so as not to startle you.
even in times like this he is gentle. you knew he didn't mean for this to happen, but sometimes slow poison hurts worse than a blow on the head.
⟡
XINLONG stands still while you let out a puff of your 4th blunt for the evening. situations made you an addict and despite all that he loved you. well, he thought he could fix you. fill your voids with his love and corner you away from all the bad things that made you the way that you are. he knew you weren't a bad person, but little did he know that you were stubborn as hell.
"i can't be with you." your hand pauses as you are about to near the blunt to your lips. "what?"
"i cannot be with someone who isn't willing to become a better person. being with you makes me anxious because you're never safe, getting high and into trouble. there is absolutely no change in anything you do. i understand you need time but i think we've had ample of time for almost a year. i don't expect you to flip around completely but you're getting worse. you're ruining yourself, along with my efforts to be there for you and also my will to be there for you. you're ruining us." what he said was true, but hurtful. it was true but you had no strength to revive yourself. wounds too deep, mind too messed to even try.
and so you let go.
"fine. im sorry. i understand where you're coming from and i wouldn't want to hold you back. hope you live a better life, genuinely." you turn away, trying to light another blunt but the fucking lighter won't work.
snap. snap. snap.
it finally lights up. you hear footsteps getting farther and your mouth parts with a sigh. the blunt falls to the floor and it feels like your chest is being ripped apart. the guilt and the helplessness make you feel like trash, but you decide to live with it, because how does it matter when you've managed to lose the only person that ever cared about you.
⟡
ANXIN barges into your room, tears filled in his eyes and his face red. you wonder how he even reached up here. your mom might've let him in but you get diverted as he holds out a photograph in front of you.
"is this real?" it's you and another guy from class 1c, holding hands. how did he even get hold of it? you don't answer and just sigh.
"how did you get that?" he looks baffled by your words. "is this real?" his voice shows urgency laced with hurt and anxiety. you brush your hair back with your left hand. you start to panic.
"who gave it to you, zhou anxin? and who is this person who's taking pictures of me-"
"really? THAT is your concern?" he sounds betrayed and extremely in despair. tears start pooling in his eyes and drop down like in a race.
you stay silent, eyes never meeting his. you had no explanation and the message got across to him. he let's out a wavering sigh, dropping the photograph on your bed, walks out of your room while wiping the tears on his cheek with the sleeve of his sweatshirt.
all anxin felt was sorrow and he didn't even know if he could handle it. his chest ached so bad as he kneeled in front of your main door, immediately after shutting it and let out a wail. never has he ever cried so bad. afterall, he loved you the most.
⟡
SANGHYEON didn't know how to explain it to you. not that he was guilty. it was just a game with his boys. the school rooftop air was chiller than expected and it wasn't helping at all.
"so this was all a bet?" you choke out, the lump in your throat hurt enough for it to be shown in your words.
sanghyeon just nodded, straightening his body while slipping his hands into his pocket. no remorse to be found on his features.
"do you understand how hurt i am?"
"hurt? y/n it hasn't even been than long since we've been in the so called 'relationship'. what's there to get so hurt over?"
"sanghyeon, i liked you. for real." he looks uninterested and quite done with you.
"take a damn joke y/n. it was a game with the boys. aaaand i won the bet. if you like me so damn much, be happy that i didn't lose to them."
"so fucking mature of you chung sanghyeon. you're an asshole." all you could do was walk away. hurt and anger weighed heavy in your chest but what can you even say to an imbecile.
