It's getting better. Sometimes it needs some days, some weeks, but it's getting better.
A week ago my whole world broke down again, and I was so so afraid and now I am sitting in the garden hearing music. I am at ease.
Maybe a little bit happy, i don't know. But it isn't everything terrible at the moment.
My problems are still the same.
I am still not allowed to work,
I am still broken up with that person that isolated me from the world, my friends, my family
I am still sorting out my life
My new flat is still a mess
I still haven't got a fitted kitchen
I have still some sort of heartbreak because of a short situationship
I am still afraid what that did and does to the friendship with that person
I am still afraid that my friends will leave again
I am still afraid that I can't be a good friend, that I leave the alone when they need me
But I decided that quitting is no option. I decided that I have to save myself. Nobody else can.
I have the privilege that I have people that don't leave me alone. People that stay with me while I save myself. People that walk this way with me.
I am here, still sorting out my life, but I decided not to quit.
It can only get better. Believe in yourself.
A week ago I thought I couldn't do it. Here I am now. Somehow there is always a way.