Marinette walks into a room, forgets why she walked in, leaves.
Jason: Who was that???
Tim: Who was who?
Jason: That random girl in our house!
Dick: I saw her two!
Damian: You idiots don’t remember what our cousin looks like?
All three: We have a cousin???
Marinette comes back: Has anyone seen my favorite sweater, I have a date.
Despite not really knowing or remembering her, Jason and Dick: You are not going out.
Marinette: What! Why?
Jason: We don’t even know who this guy-
Marinette: girl.
Jason: This girl is!
Marinette huffs: Just think of Damian but a girl.
Tim looks at her horrified, Jason freezes in terror, Dick is trying not to think of the negatives about Damian.
Marinette: A lovely person that deserves recognition, for their dedication, and respect.
Damian: I believe Alfred is drying it currently.
Marinette thanks Damian and leaves. The others turn their heads to Bruce, who was sitting in the chair the whole time.
Bruce: Tim, I want a file on her “date” since yesterday and Dick, contact her family. I want you to find out what she likes as a bribe. Damian, I need her name so Dick can do his job.
Damian: While I am not inclined to rat out our cousin, I do like the position of power I now have. What can you offer me for my information?
Jason: For the name of our cousin, I am willing to buy you a horse farm.
Damian: Deal, her name is Marinette Dupain- Cheng.
Bruce: Dick, go now! Take the jet if you have to, hurry before it’s too late!
Dick leaves to gather bribe information.
Tim: I have gathered information! She lives in Paris!
Bruce texts Dick the information.
Damian: Anything else?
Bruce: I will dedicate a section of the research team to vegan and vegetarian dietary options for public schools.
Damian: and?
Tim: I will convert two supermarkets into animal hospitals.
Damian: and?
Jason: I will give up my favorite apartment in Spain.
Damian: Deal, her date’s name is-
A magic hole appears and hands covers his mouth. A minute passes and he’s smirking. The hole disappears and he gets up.
Bruce: Wait, Damian. You didn’t tell the name. What was that-
Damian: uh uh uh no can do father, I said it once. There is no reason for me to repeat myself, you know I hate that.
Damian leaves.
———-
Later Damian is paid for his cooperation in holding Kawami’s and feeding them and having them in his room for the night.















