#kinda diary

[theoliwier]

It's sad looking at ur mom who used to be the closest person at the time now she's going through sth she doesn't wanna share and she doesn't know me and my struggles at all.

Staring at each other with so many unsaid things. Looking at each others' worries without the courage to speak up and talk properly.

Well I know she's not the best supporter but I can't even find myself hating her cuz I'm too empathetic, tend to explain ppl's behaviour without the reason. I hate to see people I care about hurting. It hurts more than their actions.

[barkingallday]

I want to write a Rockstar & his fan AU short stories because I've been craving to read that AU as mentioned several times here and I think I'll have to do it myself if it's not here. But English isn't my first language, so it'll be in Japanese or maybe I'll try like hell to write it in English. Mmh.

[barkingallday]

Hearing Liam visited Tōdai-ji (東大寺) in Nara during the 2025 tour made me really happy, because Tōdai-ji is one of my favorite temples in Nara.

According to the fan who took a pic with Liam, he met him really early in the morning, so I’m guessing he went to see the Daibutsuden (大仏殿), since it opens at 7:30 a.m. I love visiting temples early in the morning too, so it’s easy for me to picture him there.

At that hour, there are usually only a few tourists, and the whole place feels solemn and austere. I can imagine the air being crisp and chilled, and the grounds being so quiet that he could hear only his footsteps on the gravel or along the cold wooden corridors. He might have caught the sound of monks chanting sutras as part of their morning practice from far away. And once he stepped into the main hall, I bet the October air felt even colder, but strangely clear. He might have seen a deer too. There are so many around there that I can easily imagine him saying hello to them.

Thinking that he was in that space, even just for a moment, makes me so happy.

[barkingallday]

RPF means creating a narrative in your head about other people's lives based on your own perspective, and then we end up dreaming of developments like "I want this kind of ending", "I want this kind of storyline" or "This must be the reason why they did that" based on what we see. That's why things like Liam and Noel not appearing on screen together, or Noel not mentioning Liam publicly, make some people feel like "I think they haven't reconciled as much as we're hyping up."

But we often forget that the people we're fangirling over are real human beings, and the aspects they don't show publicly are probably far more numerous than what we see—just like ordinary people, or maybe even more so because they're fucking rockstars.

They are the kind of guys who managed to hide the fact that they'd reconciled and were planning a reunion tour for so long, so there's no way regular fans can know what their relationship is like now or how close they've become. Maybe they're FaceTiming every night, or maybe they're just like co-workers who don't contact each other much on their days off (which might make Liam feel a bit sad). Either way, we have absolutely no idea until they reveal it themselves, but that time may never come, IMO.

the truth of their relationship won't be revealed until after both of them have passed away, or until all of their family members are gone. So let's just try to stay chill, watch Supersonic, and read archives here and fanfics on AO3.

[barkingallday]

Personally, I think the BRITs will be low-key: a video for Noel's legendary past works, a guest speech (Paul Weller, maybe?), and a classic cheeky but brilliant Noel Gallagher acceptance speech.

But the thought of Liam potentially attending has me so on edge. We’ve spent years digging through their past, but we've never gotten to see their dynamic unfold in real time. Yes, we saw them back on stage last year, but we were just watching them as tiny specks from far-off seats or captured in shaky fan-cams or official but short clips.

If Liam shows up by his side next week, we’ll be watching it happen in high-def, in real-time. We won't be looking back anymore; we'll be witnesses to the start of a whole new chapter. That’s wild, innit?

[barkingallday]

Just listend to the talksport interview. Sorry if I'm way off base, but I feel like Noel's way of speaking is starting to sound like Liam's. I have no idea how much time they've actually spent together or been talking, but it might be proof of all time they've been sharing time together, it really warms my heart.

[barkingallday]

Maybe it’s because of the similar drama happened here in Japan recently, but seeing the constant infighting between Liam-fans and Noel-fans feels hollow. I don’t understand how you can claim to love their dynamic or even "ship" them while simultaneously despising or looking down on one of them. Perhaps there’s some fandom history I’m missing as a newcomer, but...

[barkingallday]

It’s sweet that Liam wants to interact with fans on X, but some fans’ desperate attempts to get him to reply are starting to make me nervous. They might say they’re just interacting with Liam, who enjoys a bit of banter, and some fans do have relatively healthy exchanges. If it stays at sending warm compliments without crossing into stalker-like behavior, it’s fine and even cute. But lately, some seem to think that posting negative comments will get a reaction (and in a way, they’re right), so they’ve started deliberately replying just to mock him. At that point, they’re no different from paparazzi who shove cameras in his face or those fans who throw things at him on stage just to provoke him. Because they and the people replying to him on X basically want the same thing from him. It’s lame to keep teasing him while pretending he’s a wanker or stupid old fuck, all just to get that “trophy” of a reply from him. Liam seems to be sticking around on X and he definitely enjoys the hype himself. Even so, I’m worried this might just keep escalating, or rather, it already feels like it’s starting to.