Sorry but this screams Otayuri “so are we going to kiss or not?"
“So are we going to kiss or not?“
Time doesn’t freeze, the world doesn’t tilt on its axis after Yuri has said the words.
Perhaps that’s what surprises Otabek the most. That’s what makes him stare at Yuri for a few moments, stare at him as if he’s seeing through him, and his focus is fully on him again only when Yuri’s expression hardens, when Yuri starts turning away without a word.
Otabek reaches for his wrist, still bare and cold from dried sweat, and in doing so he achieves his goal of making Yuri stay. Except now the emotions on Yuri’s face are too many for Otabek to discern.
“Whatever. I didn’t mean it anyway,” Yuri mumbles like he’s choking on his pride.
How Yuri can go from sex on ice to insecure fifteen-year-old is something Otabek has been struggling to find the answer to for about twenty-four hours, since he first saw him create his new exhibition skate in clothes that too often drew his thoughts very far away from the matter at hand.
He realizes he needs to get words out.
In the short time they’ve spent together, one question between them is their constant.
Are you going to be my friend or not? Are you going to help me lay everyone flat out at my exhibition or not?
Are we going to kiss or not?
That’s no question at all, Otabek thinks. It’s not, Do you want to kiss me or not?
And yet Yuri seems to think it’s up to Otabek alone, as if Otabek hasn’t been kissing him in his mind for days straight.
His hand is still holding Yuri’s wrist, he realizes, and even though Yuri is not looking at him, he’s not pulling away either.
“I want to,” he says. Not the question Yuri asked, but close enough.
Yuri’s eyes lift to his, waiting, hopeful and wary. Otabek can read it in his friend’s eyes, his next question.
But what happens when you find something more exciting? Am I a song you listen to on repeat for one full day and then never listen to ever again? Will you remember it on your next birthday if we kiss now?
“But I don’t want it to hurt,” he says. There’s no time for half truths.
“Hurt? You think-” Yuri starts, and stops. “You’re my friend and I want to kiss you and it’s going to hurt if we don’t. It’s going to hurt us both.”
His wrist slips away from Otabek’s hand when Yuri reaches to grab him by the front of his jacket, his face so close to his that his whispers are like explosions. “You waited for years. I don’t have that kind of patience. This program was me signing the contract on this thing we have, so get it out of your fucking mind if you’re scared that I’ll forget about you once we’re on different ends of the same continent.”
Yuri’s pupils are blown wide, and Otabek can’t help but feel like his are the same. He wonders if Yuri noticed. If he can feel his heart through his jacket.
Otabek realizes that in the short time they’ve spent together there has never been room for doubt, that their Yes is always absolute, irreversible, and fear is still there but so is hope and want.
“Yes,” he says, and it’s one more quad added to the second half of his program. It could win him a medal or it could cost him a broken leg.
He forgets about the danger as Yuri wraps his arms around his neck and pulls him down slightly to put his lips on his. Too brief, barely a ghost before they hear someone coming their way and they have to pull apart. Somehow, their hands remain linked, and he hadn’t even noticed they had found each other.
It’s his turn in their game of yes or no. “Do you want to take this somewhere more private or not?” He doesn’t let himself doubt.
Yuri is sex on ice again when he replies, “Now you’re talking.”
Babe! You always give me the best prompts, bless you ♥ I hope you liked this!
