#knife roomba

[oleander-to-oleandest]

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[torpublishinggroup]

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[lordsireno]

Zanzo making observations in the break room. Korsica tries to save her ankles

[non-cannon]

So, when I made the Roomba GLaDOS with a Knife meme post, I implied in the tags that I got there from a serious AU idea. And since no one asked, I've decided to explain that AU/my thought processes in a separate post here.

So, I'm not a nuclear expert or anything, but my understanding is that nuclear reactors have a point of no return when they fail, and that once you get past that point, it's going to fail no matter what, but there can be a varying amount of time until it does fail depending on the context of the reactor's failure.

So, I was thinking, what if at some point during Chapter 8 (maybe 9), while Chell and PotaDOS are in Wheatley's Aperture, while they're getting announcements about the imminent failure of the reactor, there's an announcement that says the point of no return as been reached, you have x minutes to escape until everything blows up. GLaDOS, gets all upset and moody, and admits that they may as well stop trying to defeat Wheatley now, because even if they put her in her body right this second, it's too late, it's going to blow no matter what.

Chell, of course, isn't the type to give up. She also remembers the test chambers with the plants growing in them that are clearly open to the sky. She manages to navigate to one of them, and acting purely on instinct manages to fling or climb or something herself and GLaDOS out of the facility in time. And once she's outside she starts running.

She manages to get far enough away to be able to survive the blast, and also curls herself around portal gun/GLaDOS to protect them. Chell may not survive unscathed, but she is alive, and is found by some humans who were curios about the massive explosion, and they're able to take her back to some kind of society and give her medical treatment. Chell keeps PotaDOS with her at all times as she's able, at least until she gets a place to live, then the portal gun and GLaDOS get put on a desk or something.

And when GLaDOS isn't blaming Chell and or Wheatley about the loss of her body and facility, or being distressingly quiet for long stretches of time, she's complaining about the fact that she's still a potato, so Chell, who does feel guilty, starts coming up with improvements. The first improvement is to replace the potato with a 9 volt battery, giving GLaDOS more than 5.5 times as much energy (if I did my math right).

Then GLaDOS complains about that running out of juice, and having to rely on Chell to replace it in a timely manner, so Chell then (either already having the know how, or learning it for GLaDOS) rigs up some small solar panels. Then GLaDOS complains about not having any mobility, so Chell decides to connect her to a Roomba. And then my brain went "Knife Roomba GLaDOS", and the rest was history.

No further thoughts about this AU could be allowed until the image was out of my head. But then I made the meme. So I was able to resume thinking about it seriously(ish).

So I decided that for whatever reason Chell doesn't live alone, lives with the people who saved her, there isn't room for solo living post apocalypse, she can't afford the rent, whatever. The point is, one of her roommates is the one who attaches the knife to Roomba GLaDOS while Chell was out. GLaDOS goes on to terrorize everyone in the house/apartment.

At least until the Roomba runs out of battery and returns to it's charger. At which point Chell disconnects GLaDOS and removes the knife. And reconnects GLaDOS to her stationary set up. Somehow GLaDOS ends up back on the Roomba with the knife, repeatedly.

And while GLaDOS does enjoy being a Roomba of Death, she complains about not being able to leave house/apartment. So the next step Chell takes is getting a baby bjorn and taking GLaDOS out on errands with her.

Eventually Chell builds GLaDOS a proper android body and Chelldos happens along the way. But yeah, the full AU idea that spawned knife roomba glados.

[thedanishcatgirl]

Local pub on the Danish island of Ærø shared a video of what they called a vacuum-rally and an electronic cockfight.

We would of course call it something else

[trans-beast]

We got a roomba and I chose to teach it how to kill

[meramori]

I think a knife roomba would be. A big problem for Achilles specifically.

[worstloki]

What if Loki’s buddy for the Funko thing is the roomba and he keeps it as a pet, names it and carries it around while he searches for his lost Tesseract?

:O!! Roomba would make a wonderful companion on such a quest!!