idk man I'm just some kinda beast

Nonbinary (They/Them) 26 and horny for monsters with big sharp teeth no thoughts head empty just vibes

[trans-beast]

I receive useless visions from a relentlessly bored idiot god and only in the liminal space between dreams and the waking world does the meme culture of R'lyeh come to me in ways mortal grey matter can only loosely grasp

[pukicho]

Be not afraid, I am going to get you

[pukicho]

I would name my child grub grub and he would be a freak

[trans-beast]

I support you

[trans-beast]

hey guys whats it mean if beautiful women pick you up and say youre gonna get fixed

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

woe! texted a casual acquaintance "I've been considering getting into knotting"

[jaguarguard]

Why?

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

KNITTING TYPO

[i-suggest-murder]

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

thank you faithful henchpeople of tumblr. you do my bidding well...

[adhd-faith-interpreter]

In the spirit of penis

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

*nods sagely* in the spirit of penis

[disappointedwaffles]

[trans-beast]

new form of Big Dick Energy just dropped

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

insane some people don't use ad blockers? babe why r u rawdogging the internet

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

it's a CESSPIT out there. wrap it before ya tap it babes!!!

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

the notes are insane

"im on mobile" adblocking exists for mobile

"im broke :(" ADBLOCKING IS FREE

"im lazy" i truly sympathize with executive dysfunction, but this is one of those quality-of-life things you need to prioritize. 3 minutes of research/installation will save you a thousandfold in time and energy. it can even help with brain fog (most people don't realize how much mental energy ads actually steal)

"i like ads" my jaw is on the fucking floor. you chose to live in a sewer, yet you will never be a ninja nor a turtle. you do not have a warrior's heart.

[sickviking-fr]

"adblock exists for mobile"

"Adblock is free"

That doesn't sound real but okay.

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

*inhaling deeply and reminding myself that Shaking The Baby only endangers the baby, and does not assist it to learn or grow* in spite of everything there are beautiful and important truths within this world that you must learn, and i must help you to learn

[enby-opossum]

Adblock DNS is easy to install! Works for all phones! It works on most ads, but not video or tumblr.

Settings → Network → Private DNS, paste in dns.adguard.com

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

⬆️⬆️⬆️ Can confirm, I use this method (alongside others) on android. for iOS the steps are different (and it may be easier to install the AdGuard DNS app instead)

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

the above will decrease the amount of ads you see system-wide. however: hands down the BEST ANDROID ADBLOCKING feature is the ability to install Firefox with uBlock Origin enabled.

Install Firefox -> Settings -> Extensions -> uBlock Origin

this only blocks browser ads, but HOLY SHIT does that matter if you try browsing websites over apps when possible. which you should bc it's awesome and gives you SO much more control. E.g. blocks youtube.com ads and you can play videos in the background. works with spotify.com too

Pro tip: toggle on 'Desktop site' to avoid mobile sites that are purposely designed to bully you into using the app. Desktop mode fixes a surprising number of problems

Note: for iOS users this isn't available bc Apple hates your guts, but there are other browser options with built-in adblocking, e.g. Firefox Focus, Brave

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

not doomed by the narrative but certainly disciplined

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

put in timeout by the narrative

[bramblepatch]

dommed by the narrative

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

i can't post anything

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

this isn't a hellsite it's a hellhome

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

huh. so it turns out my religious trauma doesn't prevent me from enjoying catholic aesthetics in horror movies. BUT it does make it significantly less natural for me, the viewer, to root for priest characters. turns out there's an innate part of me that sees a church uniform and just starts booing. i see a priest and i want him to fail miserably.

how did i learn this about myself? well recently i watched the popular horror film The Exorcist

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

anyways this website has rotted my mind because the entire movie the only two thoughts echoing back and forth in my head like pong were "god forbid women do anything" and "hell yeah white baby!"

not the first time i've watched an exorcism while rooting for the demonic entity. i do consider this film a comedy though. straight up started cheering when she walked down the stairs backwards

that's my girl!!! she's so mean to the priest character but he deserves it for being a narc

in conclusion: i love her your honor

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

more characters with superpowers who look into the whole superhero thing and decide "hm no i do not want to participate in this actually"

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

to be clear i'm not saying they turn to supervillainy. they just look at their superpower-based career options and decide to go in an unrelated direction. dental hygienist. supply chain management. HVAC technician in surprisingly high demand

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

some of them do superpower hobbies on the weekend, but a good portion of them are just "eh. my body could technically do it but this is not fun for me?" like it's literally just excercise. why spend your free time training for a marathon when you could be crafting

a lucky few have highly marketable powers which make for extremely well-paid gig work (standard teleporter hourly pay is insane), but it's not exactly a passion driven career. yeah speedsters can make bank working production lines but that gets repetitive real fast. also that shit is tiring. yeah the agricultural industry is paying you big bucks to control the weather during harvest season but you're going to have back spasms for months after.

[whotooklortan]

One time at my manufacturing job I got asked about what superpowers I would want and I concluded that the most passion driven power/job I could imagine was just knowing the precise location of all sharks. I would be unable to control them or communicate with them. But I am invaluable to conservation work, ocean photography, zoology, lifeguards, etc. I have no idea if I could or would want to profit from this, I would probably still have a 9-5, but I like to think of spending my spare time just answering texts about Greenland sharks and doing horrifying guest appearances on weather broadcasts.

[pukicho]

The peaceful deer lives her whole life not knowing what war is

[hurtmitcrab]

Wrong again, piss boy.

[pukicho]

Okay those deer knew war, but most don't

[draconym]

Fordite from the artisan dildo factory

[draconym]

I'm not calling it Dragonite because it's not from Bad Dragon. It's from @alchemistechidna. I think we should call it Johnson Agate.

[draconym]

[pronouncingitwang]

at some point in your life you will be boiling fruit, water, sugar, and lemon juice in a pot to make a syrup or jam. the instructions will tell you to simmer for a certain amt of time. your timer will go off and you will look at the pot and go, "hm, this doesn't look thick enough. maybe i'll let it go for another 10 minutes." this is the devil speaking. it's only so liquid right now because it is at boiling point. it will thicken when it cools down. learn from the follies of my youth and do not let this happen to you

[yokowan]

at some point in your life you will be making a sauce or a stew in which you need to add cornstarch to thicken it. and you will prepare a slurry of starch in cold water and think "this looks like way too little starch to thicken this amount of liquid." this is the devil speaking. cornstarch instantly polymerizes at 95°C and if you add too much it will turn into an impossibly thick goop.

[le-jardin-inculte]

at some point in your life you will be making some sort of cream based dessert that requires gelatin to thicken it. and you will soak some gelatin sheets in water and think "this is too few gelatin sheets for this amount of cream." this is the devil speaking. it will thicken in the fridge and if you add too much you will end up with milk jelly

[shithowdy]

at some point in your life you will be baking cookies. you will take the sheet out after twelve minutes as the recipe instructs and the cookies will still be glistening and soft. "these don't seem cooked enough," you will think to yourself, "i should place them back into the oven until their edges are nice and golden." this is the devil talking. this is how you get dry, overdone cookies. the cookies will continue to bake on the warm sheet for several more minutes and then harden up after sitting on a rack for a while. trust the process. trust the process.

[trans-beast]

at some point in your life you will be making french toast sticks in your oven. in five minutes you need to flip them over or they won't be fully cooked all the way through. "it's been a busy day. i could use a nap. surely i can take a quick snooze and just ask my friends to wake me up." this is the devil talking. all your friends are either somewhere else or manifest as tumblr mutuals. you will sleep through the text-based shrieks as people beg you to wake up. your sticks are still in the oven burning to this day.

[ammnontet]

my nothing

[crafblr]

btw I’ve found these stretches from the WAK blog very helpful when knitting a lot:

Plus make sure to take breaks regularly - and stop if anything starts to hurt!

especially with gift knitting I know it can be tempting to push through it for a deadline, but it’s really not worth causing long term injury. (And anyone knit-worthy should be understanding of that, imho.) Stay well :)

[gingersnappish]

Also good for artists drawing with pencils/on a tablet/with a pen!

[not-poignant]

Also good for writers

[sageiswherethemageis]

And crocheters (that word looks wrong)

[eyesinthecrypt]

Say hookers coward

[movementnudge]

Movement nudge! More hands!

[trans-beast]

Can't wait to share this one with the wizards who specialize in casting spells with their hands

[calebwittebane]

ok everyone time to start laying eggs

[the-frightening-ghoul]

‎

[calebwittebane]

time to start laying eggs, frightening ghoul

[the-frightening-ghoul]

‎

[the-frightening-ghoul-jr]

‎

[calebwittebane]

this is how blogging can have a huge impact on the lives of people and ghouls

[hellsitegenetics]

String identified: t t tat ag gg t t tat ag gg, gtg g t ggg ca a a g act t a g

Closest match: Cephalopholis fulva genome assembly, chromosome: 18 Common name: Coney

(image source)

[footlongdingledong]

had a dream that there was this new tiktok trend called "scrubbing" where people would take images of fictional characters and put them in images of bathtubs and drag around transparent pngs of soap and brushes with their tiktok art tablets and like liquify tool their hair down to mimic giving them a shower. and people would get into flamewars in the comments of every single video over the types of soap they picked and if the images had decently removed backgrounds and if they got soap in their eyes. and it got onto the news because it turned out everyone doing the trend was doing it compulsively like they physically couldn't stop and each video was a solid few minutes long because they were just collectively obsessively recording themselves fake-showering these fictional characters and arguing about it online

[footlongdingledong]

for the record I have never used tiktok and like explicitly in the dream I learned about it secondhand from a discord server so there's that also which is funny I think

[hellsitegenetics]

String identified: a a a tat t a t tt t ca "cg" ta ag cta caact a t t ag att a ag a taat g a a t t tt at tat a t t a t c gg t a . a gt t aa t ct g t t a t c a t ag a ct acg a t gt a t . a t gt t t ca t t t g t t a g t c t ca c't t a ac a a t g ca t t cct cg t a-g t cta caact a agg at t t c a tt a ct t a a at t ca a c t' tat a c t

Closest match: Mya arenaria isolate MELC-2E11 chromosome 1 Common name: Soft-Shell Clam

[passionpeachy]

year of the horse